LOSINGJESS   15,736
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wake up call

Friday, April 16, 2010

well I weighed in this morning and although I had already eaten breakfast and had not used the bathroom yet I weighed 4.4 pounds more than I did last week.

Its really amazing how much you can gain in just one week, I wish it was that easy to lose.

It really shows me though that its very easy to gain it all back and its very easy to slip back into old habits.

Im glad I desided to weigh myself this week... Im glad I dident wait untill next month because It would have prob been devestating if I had of gone a few more weeks like this.

Gaining 4 1/2 pounds sucks but Im going to turn this into a positive... Im going to use this as a huge learning expereince and a wake up call to myself. If I do what I have been doing Im gonna continue to gain weight... and I would rather stay the same than gain. Im going to go back to doing exactly what I was doing before and stop all the little things that have got me in the downward spiral I have been in for the last couple weeks.


-things I will not do-

* I will not eat out more than twice a month!
* I will not nibble mindlessly throughout the day
* I will not obsess about how much I lose or gain on the scale
* I will not make excuses when It comes to my workouts


-things I will do-

* I will make smart and healthy choices when I do deside to eat out... which means no more buffets!
* I will put everything I eat on a plate and sit down to eat it
* I will plan out my meals and not let myself get to hungrey
* I will workout at least 20 minutes a day - 5 Days per week
* I will drink 8 glasses of water per day
* I will write in my blog every day to keep myself accountable
* I will write down everything that I put in my mouth!!!

......

Im going to turn this into a possitive and by next month I will be back to the weight I was at last week and the month after that hopefully I will be in the 180's..... but if Im not Im not going to go crazy.

Have a great friday everyone!!!

~ Jess emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BECKYCOLVIN 4/20/2010 4:29PM

    Jess--
I look at my friends' SparkPages every once in a while, and I noticed your weight was just slightly up. (I've gained 3-5 lbs in the last few weeks, too, which is frustrating because it put me back up over 200 again.)
I also am having to reassess, figure out what I've been doing wrong, and get back on track before losing any more ground. Like you said, even if I'm not LOSING weight, I certainly don't want to gain any more. If maintaining is all I can manage right now, then that's what I'll do.

Keep it up!
Becky

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BIZENMO 4/20/2010 12:04PM

    I love how you never get so far down that you can't pick yourself up, brush yourself off and figure out some other way to conquer your goals! You are simply AMAZING!! Keep it up, Girlfriend!!! You CAN do this....YOU WILL SUCCEED!!!
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SPARKYJEANIE1 4/16/2010 3:20PM

    Aw, Jess -

You're so amazing! I love how you're always able to target what may not be going so well with your routine and you switch it up, and aren't scared to do so! You're fearless - and that 180lbs range will appear right before you eyes before you know it! You look amazing to me, already!
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I can totally identify with the whole eating out-thing. I caught myself eating out twice this week already because I procrastinated in grocery shopping, and I really felt bad about it, although I didn't overdo it - guess that's the trick. Knowing when to say "when" and keeping all that to a minimum.
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I think your new goal of 20 minutes 5x/wk will make a ginormous impact. Remember to keep nice and hydrated since summer's around the corner and it just helps in general to flush out all the bad stuff.

Chin up, lovebug! I think you're MARVELOUS!!! Keep up the wonderful work and try to cut yourself some slack. After all, none of us became overweight overnight, so it'll take some time to get to where we need to - BUT GIRL, we WILL make it there!!!!

*hugs*
Jeanie

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YESITSDEB 4/16/2010 11:11AM

    You'll get back on track - no worries! You've got the plan and we know you've got the motivation and ability to make it happen. Go get em. emoticon

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BECKS79 4/16/2010 11:10AM

    It is good to have a plan and to figure out where and what went wrong .. sometimes reality checks are what we need! Great job recognizing and making things into a positive! Keep up the great work!!

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MORETHANWEIGHT 4/16/2010 10:52AM

    Well we all know I can relate having gained 10 pounds just a week ago
Your approach to this whole situation absolutely amazes me
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SARAHJ19 4/16/2010 10:46AM

    emoticon I am right there with you! I had to give myself a wake up call yesterday! It is good you can pin point what you need to change and focus on! Accountability is the main thing I am trying to work on for myself! Way to be so positive! You have such a great attitude! emoticon Keep up your great work! You have sparked me to refocus on a few more things! emoticon Have a great weekend!
~Sarah emoticon

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JESSSPARK 4/16/2010 10:35AM

    emoticon Here's to hoping some of it is water retention! :)

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MESSYJESSY22 4/16/2010 9:58AM

    I'm in the same boat as you. 3lbs in 1 week ouch! But at least we're seeing what can happen when we don't stick with it! Keep going with your plan and you'll be there in no time!

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MG3KDZ 4/16/2010 8:48AM

    I just went through the same thing myself and I know that it is very disappointing..But like you said at least you have realized it and are going to make a change emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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DELILAS 4/16/2010 8:42AM

    You're still doing amazing! We all need a wakeup call sometimes - and you've got a great attitude towards it! emoticon

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MICHCLEARY 4/16/2010 8:38AM

    Sounds like a good plan. Keep us posted on your success! You can win with a good plan.

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HULLAF 4/16/2010 8:30AM

    This past month (well, frankly, most of this year so far) I have gained and lost the same 10 pounds. I feel your pain! Hang in there - we can do it!

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MALEXANDER4 4/16/2010 8:28AM

    I'm sorry to hear about your gain. But I can understand so the feelings. shoot hun, i've passed the same weight now three times. We are going to do this. we just have to plan, think, and act. Notice I said we, this is a team journey.

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blog

Thursday, April 15, 2010

It sucks how bad a time I am having getting back on track. I did pretty good for a few days and then I let myself get too hungry yesterday while out at the store and ended up making the choice to go to cici's pizza and eat like a pig. hungry plus an un-ending supply of pizza is not a good idea, ever!

I made the desision a few days ago that I was going to stop weighing myself every week to keep myself from getting so disapointed when I dont lose very much. Ever since I told myself that though I keep getting thoughts running into my head that say " oh its ok to eat a little more because your not weighing yourself till next month" .... "its ok to eat out again for the 2nd time in less than a week because, your not weighing yourself till next month"....

Maybe weighing myself weekly is disapointing to me when I dont lose very much but I think it keeps me on track more than I realize. I think If I do it montly I will end up gaining weight back... or not lose any at all. I really dont want that.

I was looking through some pictures of myself, the fat me and me now.... I really have come a long way. I was thinking about how sad it would be if I quit right now, if I fell off the wagon so to speak and never got back on again. I could just see me in the future looking at pictures of me now and pictures of me all fat again after gaining all the weight back. It would be really sad if I never reached my goal and just threw in the towel.

I have kinda been feeling lately like I have been slipping that way, becoming more lax in what I eat and how I track my food. I do not want to stop here, I want to continue and reach my goal and then stay a healthy weight once I am there.

I know the only way that I am going to be able to do that is if I find a way to get out of the funk I am in and get back on track.

I think I might go back and start small again... maybe start my spark program over again, doing all the small things and working on keeping track of them to get my momentum going again... like drinking all my water and eating enough vegetables.

Im going to make things better again.

~ Jess

Ps... My sister went to my parents house this weekend and they found a picture of me when I was at my biggest. Its crazy to think I was once that big. I refuse to go in the upward direction again. Its so easy to slip back into old habits... Im not going to let myself become that person again though.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LOSINGJESS 4/26/2010 9:29AM

    wow blog spam... not cool

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KENNYWHEELS 4/15/2010 10:32PM

    i think you might need to set up some motivational things around like even that picture as a reminder of what you are doing this for. it might help you. and keep on sparking , it helps
kenny emoticon

and always remember you are worth all of the hard work

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JENNIFER0807 4/15/2010 4:31PM

    try mustering up motivation when you GAIN weight after trying so hard to lose...lol. and still im here. You on the other hand have had fabulous results. Better an ounce lost than gained. LOL i guess i have to be glad they dont have a CiCi's around where i live. Only the commercials to tease us chubby folk! emoticon

Comment edited on: 4/15/2010 4:31:12 PM

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LAWRALOO 4/15/2010 4:27PM

    I feel ya. I've been scared lately about the same thing. what if I quit? What if I end up right back where I started.
Honestly...I don't think I'd ever let myself.

I decided to start focusing on something else. Muscles, not weight loss.
Because with building muscles, comes burning calories comes weight loss right?
I'm going to start paying better attention to really 'eating clean' rather than just watching calories. If I watch calories....I can still sneak in crap.
If I eat clean....can I really? Probably not so easily. lol

Maybe just try to find something else to focus on rather than weight loss?


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JESSSPARK 4/15/2010 4:06PM

    Any loss is loss! We are not on the biggest loser and we cannot expect to put up "big numbers" every week- we are not working out 8 hours a day every day! Small numbers add up over time!

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SLOADMAN 4/15/2010 4:02PM

    It's always easier to slip back into old habits than it is to keep the good ones... Personally, I need to weigh in every week, whether there is a loss of one pound or five, a loss is still a loss... or at least staying the same. It keeps you accountable. Like you've said, if you know you're not going to weigh in until next month, you'll eat this and put off that work out, because "you'll make it up" but we've all been there, and obviously it didn't work or we wouldn't be on this website! Good luck getting back on track, you can do it!! emoticon

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SWEETNEENI 4/15/2010 4:02PM

    You are not going to go backward! You are an incredible woman who is stronger than any craving or self-doubt. Look at you! You are an inspiration.

Do exactly what you said - start small, stay accountable.

I believe in you. emoticon

Comment edited on: 4/15/2010 4:03:01 PM

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bad weekend

Monday, April 12, 2010

well I had a really rough weekend. I was kinda in an "I just dont care" mood... I dident workout at all, I ate like sh*t.... I mean really really bad. I think saturday I dident even have a set meal... I just snacked the entire day.

I would sit here and hang my head in shame but I know from expereience that dosent get you anywhere. Im just going to admit that I had a bad weekend and start over.

Im off to a really great start this weekend. I got up at 5:30 after having like 10 hours of sleep and had a bowl of old fashioned oatmeal with peaches and a half an orange. Ive had 2 cups of water already and got my cardio in for the day already.

I have been cleaning my deck for the last few days. It was black and green with crud and alge and general moldy funk... It was not pretty. You couldent even see what color the wood was suppose to be. Its never been sealed, the people that lived here before us I geuss just slapped it up and never did anything eles to it.

Anyway it took me around 6 hours of hard core sweeping and scrubbing, 2 gallons of deck cleaner and a bottle and a half of straight bleach. Now you can see the wood color and there is no more funk on it. My arms feel like jello too, which is another good thing. :-)

Today Im going to be staining and sealing it and Im looking forward to lounging in the back yard with the kids this summer and basking in the glory of all my hard work.

:-) Hope everyone has a happy monday!!! Lets make this week awesome!

~ Jessica

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUDITH1654 4/13/2010 4:15PM

    Awesome job! And great attitude. We can't undo the past, but we can shape the future! Good for you for not giving up! emoticon

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COCOMODEAN 4/13/2010 9:20AM

    I had a bad weekend too. I didn't go too crazy, but crazy enough. Yesterday, I got right back into the groove of things. One still has to keep their eyes on the prize. emoticon

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HULLAF 4/13/2010 7:53AM

    Good job getting back on track! Everyone has a bad weekend, or day, or week. The best you can do is get back on track. Hope the deck turns out great!

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BIZENMO 4/13/2010 12:21AM

    It's hard keeping your nose to the grindstone EVERY day! Glad to hear you've cut yourself some slack! It's only one day of the many that will make up the rest of your life....if you can't allow yourself a little "joy" and "freedom," what's the point?! Sounds like you've recovered and are back on track! You go, Girl!!!

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BELUGA20 4/12/2010 6:45PM

    I had a bad weekend too. Nothing to do but to make the week go better.

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SPARKYJEANIE1 4/12/2010 11:26AM

    HEY!! Well I'd say that all that scrubbin away has definitely got you burning some MAJOR cals, so don't worry about that "I ate like sh*t weekend"....

That's what I love about you, you acknowledge where you have gone wrong and immediately pick yourself back up and get right back at it! That's my girl!!!

Now...imagine how great it'll feel when you're able to see that deck in all it's beauty with the knowledge that YOU did it!!

Yaay, buddy!!
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YESITSDEB 4/12/2010 10:12AM

    Great attitude! What happened over the weekend is over and you're already moving forward. WELL DONE! The hard work you did cleaning that deck certainly counts as fitness! Enjoy the fruits of your labor and have a great week! emoticon

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JENNIFER0807 4/12/2010 10:11AM

    ooh i wish i had a deck...and a house for that matter. I am apartment living in the city! ughh... good job on getting back on that horse! emoticon

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MONTANA_ED 4/12/2010 9:09AM

    That is great that you just got back into it after your "bad day". I too have had bad days and will even tell people that I'm having a bad day - but tomorrow I will be better. Besides, having a bad day once in a while is probably a good thing! Keeps your body wondering just what the heck is going on...

Keep up the great work!

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SWEETNEENI 4/12/2010 8:58AM

    You may have had some setbacks this weekend but the deck was a major achievement! WTG! Just set your train back on track and don't look back. Happy Monday emoticon

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JULIEQ2011 4/12/2010 8:53AM

    Great attitude! We've all had those weekends but what makes you a success is getting right back on track. Sounds like that deck gave you quite the workout! I hope you have an amazing week. You should be very proud of yourself :-)

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MIGHTYFINEWINE 4/12/2010 8:41AM

    You go girl! I love the "I did it. It was stupid. Let's move on." attitude. I think dwelling in mistakes is what got us all here in the first place.

Awesome job turning things around!

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motivation & weigh in

Friday, April 09, 2010

Last week:192
This week:191.8

loss for this week: -0.2

..................

I want to be mad at point 2 pounds but the truth is last week I lost over 2 pounds and thats a big number for me... I geuss I am due for a down week.

I have also been slacking on my workouts... I did ellipitcal twice this week and the truth is that elliptical is pretty easy for me now... its my lazy workout. I geuss I have just had a general lack of motivation to workout this past week. I havent been wanting to get up in the morning and then I use the excuse that the kids are up so I cant workout and then by the time they go to bed at night I still dont feel like it... well even more so.

This week I need to pick up the pace on my workouts while still watching my food. I know motivation is not something you have or dont have, its just a choice you make for yourself... you choose to workout and how hard you workout, you choose to eat right. I need to start making better choices for me.

well hopefully next week will be better overall for me. :-) I hope everyone eles has an awesome week as well!!!

~ Jess emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HULLAF 4/9/2010 9:33PM

    A loss is a loss! You will have a better week next week. Keep up the good work. emoticon

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ANALYZETHIS1 4/9/2010 11:16AM

    Keep up the good work Jess

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YESITSDEB 4/9/2010 10:09AM

    hey, .2 lbs is nothing to be ashamed of. Any loss is a positive thing. Keep up the great work! emoticon

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CRK910 4/9/2010 9:30AM

    I hear ya Jess.
I have found sometimes, especially with a new baby in the house that the only time I can fit in my workouts are during my lunch hour, so I come home and jump on my treadmill for 30 minutes, take a shower, pack a lunch and head back to the office.

I have found that even when I dont really feel like excercizing and I start to make excuses I just have to force myself to do it. To quote one of the guys at my gym... the hardest part of excercize is actually getting to the gym lol.

best of luck on your motivation this week, and let me know if you need anything :)

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RITAROSE 4/9/2010 9:08AM

  Can you set aside some time to make a plan for next week? Things to consider would be what you can do when you are faced with a lack of motivation and a desire to be lazy? I had that problem big time in the beginning, but hardly ever now that I've come to love exercise. I walk everywhere I possibly can now and even when the weather isn't good as long as I'm prepared for it, I enjoy my walks. This journey is a process. Don't beat yourself up when you don't do what you should or do what you shouldn't, just go on after reviewing why the slip up happened and how you can avoid it in the future. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticonRitarose

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WATCHMEGO2 4/9/2010 9:06AM

    It may be 'only' .2 but it is .2 in the right direction!! I think a lot of people struggled this week but we have to just keep going and things will work out. emoticon

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MG3KDZ 4/9/2010 9:01AM

    I hope next week is a better week for you and me..I seem to have lost that motivation that you speek of=( I will find it..lol Have a great weekend...


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Friday Weigh in : Week 4

Friday, April 02, 2010

History for 2010

1/2/10 : 204.6
2/2/10 : 200.0
3/2/10 : 196.4
4/2/10: 192.0

Total lost for the year : 12.6 lbs.

........................................
...............

Last week: 194.0
This week: 192.0

Im happy with this weeks weigh in. 2 pounds is awesome! I can see a difference in my body as well so Im pretty sure its not water weight. Im hoping to continue dropping this next week. we will see though.

Im losing an average of 4 pounds a month, which isent so bad I guess. I wish it was more but, my body is not going to go any faster than it wants to go. I was really hoping to get to goal this year but if things keep going like the current trend, then I might have to settle for reaching my goal summer 2011. No big deal. If I keep going like Im going I will be around 170 by christmas... and Im sure I will still look pretty awesome at 170!
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So Im back on track... fad diets aside.... and ready to work really hard to get another pound or two next week. :-) Im feeling really really great about myself right now... well when I have my clothes on (its getting quite devestating on the loose skin battle ::sigh::) .... My arms are looking better in tank tops, something I have always wanted .... and My size 16 jeans are starting to look looser. Im also getting close to wearing one of my mini goal shirts... Its a size girls large tshirt from my favorite band MAE... Im wearing it in my profile pic, its super tight though so Im not quite there yet... another 6-10 pounds and it should be good on me.

Well, gotta go! Time to rock next week!

~ Jess emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FLYSOHIGH 4/9/2010 8:57PM

    I find this post very comforting. I am happy for you! But you are also giving me hope, so thank you!

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BELUGA20 4/2/2010 11:26AM

    Yay! You are going great!

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CANTON01 4/2/2010 8:43AM

    Congrats!! You're doing a great job!

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ANNISSAT 4/2/2010 8:30AM

    Way to go! Keep it up! emoticon

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