Thursday, May 30, 2013
Yesterday I was faced with situations that were dangerous for me. I was exposed to foods that would probably trigger a binge.
First, I went for an oil change. The good thing is that I wasn't even going there thinking of the Krispy Kreme donuts they keep for people who are waiting. FREE. I usually have one or two (I go in the morning while they still have some.) Then I have the mentality of "well I've blown it on calories today, so who cares if I go for everything I desire." Once I was there I saw a man taking a bite out of a donut and was reminded that they were available. I told myself a firm no and forgot about it. That wasn't as hard as it would have been earlier in this binge-free streak.
While I was waiting for the car, I walked over to the nearby Starbucks. I decided on my treat to be a skinny vanilla latte (iced). While I was waiting to be waited on, I saw their sweets display and eyed up the rice krispy bars. That is a rather low calorie choice, I told myself, but shook my head and told myself no. Made my order for my latte and moved on.
After the oil change, I talked a while with the salesman. Got some numbers on a car purchase war were thinking of making later that day. No food problems there, except it got to be 11:30 and I was getting hungry. I had to go to the grocery store and thought i should go home and eat something first.
But I decided I would wait so my lunch wouldn't be so early. I went in the store and the walk from the door to the produce department takes my right through the bakery. I scanned the ad for their sales when coming in and saw that they had a special on pound cakes, so when I was going through the bakery I came right past the table with the cakes on it. I stopped, and spotted the sour cream pound cake and gazed at it, debating with myself if I was going to get it. Thought about how moist it might be. Then I glanced up and took in the sight of all the other goodies and caught myself in the act and asked myself "what are you doing?!!!! WALK AWAY!" I went and got my baby carrots and thanked God for helping me see what I was doing. I made it out of the store with my groceries which included a planned treat. I had seen a few days ago a kind of vanilla biscuit made in Israel, that are 35 calories for two. Just a perfect treat for after a meal. Not heavy on sugar so it doesn't trigger binges for me.
I went home, had a healthy lunch and two biscuits.
Again I had to expose myself to food. After lunch I went to Trader Joes to get my wild blueberries for my oats in the morning. I picked up a few things and the cookies caught my eye, but not for long. I was satisfied from my biscuits. I was full from my lunch.
I managed to get a 45 minute walk before my son asked me to meet him for coffee. I wasn't even tempted by treats.
One more issue came up that day. We were buying a car after we'd eaten at Firehouse Subs. At Firehouse I bought the sandwich as a combo so I could get a bag of chips to take home for some evening with supper. I put them in our truck, which we proceeded to trade in for a car. (YAY! I finally have another corolla...I'd given mine to my son a few years ago, and boy did I miss that car.) When we cleaned out the truck my hubby gave me my chips. I walked around carrying them while we waited for the new car to be prepared for us to take home. I worked hard to not eat them. I was really tempted. I told my hubby that I was struggling to not eat them. That diffused it and I realized that I really didn't want them.
I'm surprised that I'm finding it easier to say no. I am not out of the woods, I know. But I feel if I continue in the prayerful mindset, I will do well. One thing I read recently is to not make such a big deal if you have a hiccup and mess up one day. Feeling like it's so terrible and that it's the end of the world if you blow it only sets you up to perpetuate the cycle of binges/restriction.
So that was DAY ELEVEN. SUCCESS!
Right now I'm happy with my calorie level and exercise routine, and I don't feel so stressed with "OH NO when is it going to happen next?!!" I"m a lot more chill.