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LORILEEPAGE's Recent Blog Entries

New goals, new freedom to schedule workouts

Saturday, May 12, 2012

Now that I will be having more flexibility in my schedule, more freedom to schedule workouts when I want, I have to set a few goals.

Lately, I've only been swimming once a week, which is the only thing I've been doing at the Y. I want to go twice a week to swim, and start using the elliptical now that my back is strong and i'm not in pain. I could make that my third trip to the Y each week. I'm working on doing some writing, so I could couple my workouts with a trip to the coffee shop near the Y to work on that.

The most important goal in my thinking, is for me to increase my ST times to 2-3 times a week. Lately, I've only been getting it in once.

I've not been walking as much and I know how important that is for me. I still need to figure out how I want to get back on track with that. Maybe once around the block (12 minutes) at the least each day.

I like to write goals on paper with check lists assisting me in reaching my goals. I will go and do that now. I'll be ready to go for the new week starting tomorrow, though I have plans to work out today and have already walked to the grocery store this morning with hubby.

I'm off to write those goals, and bike for a half hour.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHERIO5 5/12/2012 8:38PM

    I'm glad you are adjusting your goals to suit your better fitness and back health, it sounds like it is a great time to rethink things. I know walking is super important to good back health, as are all the other things! I hope you enjoy your new schedule, how nice to be able to move things around to suit you!

I hope you have a lovely Mother's Day!


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BABY_GIRL69 5/12/2012 5:33PM

    Soon as get these things all under control you might change them. So make a list add a few new things & then change it again...whatever you do have fun!

God bless,


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BJPENNY70 5/12/2012 2:56PM

    Lorilee this is wonderful! Don't overwhelm yourself by trying to do everything at once. Ease yourself into it until you are finally doing it all. Have fun.

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AUTUMNBRZ 5/12/2012 2:00PM


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SIPLE3 5/12/2012 1:33PM


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Changes taking place in my life

Monday, May 07, 2012

After feeling down for quite some time, I realized my job was getting me down, working with a very negative person. I felt poisoned and I'm tempted sometimes to get involved, but not wanting to this time. I also felt more drawn to spend time with my grandchildren on weekends, which wasn't possible with working most weekends. I think since I went and spent time with my son's little family in Hawaii, I realized that I wasn't appreciating the fact that my other kids live closer and I was missing seeing the grandkids grow up. When I did have a day off on the weekend, I was in need of time to exercise of just do stuff by myself or with hubby. But now I feel like sharing that time with them, too. By quitting, I have freed up precious time. If I search for another job, it will be daytime hours in the weekdays. Preferably part time so I still feel like i have time to myself. I don't know how people manage to work full time and not get stressed out.

For now, I am going to spend a bit of time each day working on the book I've always wanted to write about my journey in life having struggled with bipolar disorder. It's something I hope will help others in the same situation, though the most important reason to write about my life is for my own benefit. Just like the reason we should be keeping blogs...to have something to look back at and see how far we've come.

Now that I quit my job, though I have two weeks to finish up, I am not feeling so depressed while on the job. I feel relief and am counting down to the end. I will miss some people, but may keep up with them. I will miss elements of the job and I know I'll probably never find such a flexible situation. My boss always was willing to take into account days we may want off. I could even take time to go to Hawaii in the spring and go to see my parents for a week in the fall. Where in the heck will I ever find another job like that???

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHLOE-D-CALICO 5/10/2012 11:50PM

    Congratulations on making the right choice for you. I know you will enjoy the time off with your hubby and the grandkids

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YIWEN39 5/9/2012 9:46PM

    Sounds like you know what's important for you, that's what matters the most :-) Enjoy the time you get to spend with your family!
When you want one, who knows, maybe you will find another very accomodating boss ;-)

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_JODI404 5/9/2012 9:04PM

    Hi Lori,

How wonderful that you are able to leave this job that is no longer meeting your needs and open up precious time with your family. "To love and be loved is the greatest happiness of all." NOTHING beats quality time with the ones you love, and also time alone to take great care of yourself as well. You are very blessed to be able to make this decision.

If you decide you need to replace this job, I hope you will find something that totally works for your schedule and doesn't bring a lot of stress.

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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DREAMINGSMALL12 5/9/2012 8:39PM

    Congrats on making a difficult choice I made a similar to spend time at home with my childern, I feel the same way how did I work full time and get anything done. Im glad your not depressed anymore and I hope you make the most of your new found freedom. :D Have a wonderful day

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BABY_GIRL69 5/7/2012 5:53PM

    It may take some doing but if you REALLY wanted to find another you could? Or if you really wanted to keep that one, I'm quite sure they may make some concessions? You never know until you ask. lol I know exactly about going to visit relatives far away but can hardly make to see the ones that are like 45mins to an hour away from me. I have gotten a little better but I need to make a plan to visit one family member once a month & not rely that they know where I live & visit me all the time.

God bless you on your journey....


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BLUE42DOWN 5/7/2012 4:09PM


For the freedom from the negative stresses and to open your time to what is truly important to you - WELL DONE!

Let yourself enjoy that freedom, then visualize and create your idea of what sort of job you want to replace it. The more clearly you know what's important, the more easily you'll know which opportunities to walk away from and which to explore.

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SHERIO5 5/7/2012 9:56AM

    It sounds like you are taking care of yourself, which is very important!!!

Sometimes we have to make that leap of faith before we see the "perfect" solution, praying you take time to enjoy exactly where you are right this minute. emoticon

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Blues and feeling lonesome.

Monday, April 30, 2012

This is mostly just a blog I'm writing to try to talk myself out of how I'm feeling.

Sure, last time I wrote I talked about the positive changes in lifestyle. Today i did something I'm not proud of. After not losing any weight this week, I felt empty, and tried to fill the hole with candy. 700 calories worth. Why? what a stupid mindless thing to do! I felt like "WTH" I'm just going to go ahead and eat what I want to right now, since i didn't lose anything this week anyway. Instead, I should have been elated that I didn't gain anything.

I think there's more going on with me than the weight issues that I think I'm having. Truly I am slightly depressed still about missing my children and grandbaby in Hawai'i. I want to be there still and am not accepting my current situation of being back home.

I try to convince myself to be happy that I had the time with them. I try to remind myself that we will go back eventually. I try to be thankful that I can spend time with my other children and grandchildren here. I'm trying to pray about it, too. I have a void and I'm lonely. Today I've texted and called anyone I can think of that might be available to talk. I think talking to people would help me feel less lonely, but it only leaves me hungering to be back in Hawai'i.

Maybe spending a little time on SP will help me get my mind off this funk.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHLOE-D-CALICO 5/10/2012 11:52PM

    Dont beat yourself up about the Candy you cant undo it , just move on and take it one meal at a time. Sending cyber hugs your way

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SKINNYPAT62 5/1/2012 11:05AM

    Hugs for you! I know what sadness and loneliness feels like. I hope you feel better soon! I miss seeing my son and he is in Colorado! emoticon

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AUTUMNBRZ 5/1/2012 7:38AM

    Giving you a big giant mental hug.

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_JODI404 4/30/2012 11:09PM


Sorry you are having a sad day and feeling depressed, missing your family.

You are keenly aware of the problem though... so that is helpful.
"not accepting" or resistance.
"tried to fill a hole."

I hope that you were able to shake off some of those feelings.
I read this blog today, I really liked it.
Don't know if any of it would help or not.

I hope tomorrow will be a better day. Be gentle with yourself. Don't beat yourself up over that candy. Fall down seven times... get up eight. Tomorrow is a new day to start again!!

Hang in there. Sending you lots of positive energy, positive thoughts, and a big hug!

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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HDHAWK 4/30/2012 8:59PM

    I'm sorry you're missing your family. I hope things are better now. emoticon

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SHERIO5 4/30/2012 8:10PM

    Sorry you are missing your loved ones. I know a little about that with my kids several hours away and lives of their own...but it doesn't help you feel any better so just know someone cares, and it's ok to miss them. Keep an eye on your sadness, I know you will. emoticon

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KAUAI-CAROLANN 4/30/2012 4:09PM

    Hey, you - would txt/talk with someone in Hawaii help or just make the funk worse?

I'll be here if you need....and will send a # if you want...sometimes having a not so familiar person listen is more comfortable or easy.


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Lifestyle Changes are something to notice. . .

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

I did something I've only done a few times since I started Sparking. I was having my breakfast and was only going to have a banana and chocolate greek yogurt. I wasn't really any hungrier for anything more. Plus, I was trying to have fewer calories in the earlier part of the day, since my hubby will probably want to eat out tonight.(I hope I can get him to go to Subway so I can get satisfaction with fewer calories.)

BUT, in a little while I plan on going for a swim, and for that I need more energy. A carb load so to speak. While there are carbs in a banana, I thought maybe I should eat some whole grain cereal with soy milk. That's what I did different. . . I made a choice to eat an item for the purpose of taking care of my body.

Well, now that I think of it, I do, on a regular basis, make choices that are putting my body's needs ahead of cravings or emotions! I've actually made a change that may now be a permanent part of my life. A lifestyle change like we talk about all the time on SP.

Now, that's something I can feel great about! I bet we all are making lifestyle changes that we don't recognize nor acknowledge. Think about it; in what area have you made a permanent change?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

YIWEN39 4/25/2012 8:39PM

    That is great :-) Isn't it fantastic to realise how far you've come? Congrats!

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_JODI404 4/25/2012 8:09PM

    Glad you are making great choices for your body and feeling good about it!!

I've made SO many awesome changes along this journey... and all are very natural so I can maintain them.

emoticon emoticon emoticon

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BLUE42DOWN 4/25/2012 6:54PM

    That's a great idea - to think about the positive changes that we make and cheer them.

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BABY_GIRL69 4/25/2012 6:07PM

    I love your blog! Isn't it amazing when your body decides to follow your mind on a healthier path of life!

God bless & thanks for sharing!


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SHERIO5 4/25/2012 2:23PM

    Isn't it great to discover you ARE becoming a better you?!!

I'm glad you had that realization today!!! It reminds me to notice my changes for the better!!


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Back on track in more ways than one.

Monday, April 23, 2012

I am on top of the world. . .

for more than one reason...yet foremost on my mind is the way my moods settled down now that a bit of time has passed since our trip. I'm sure the emotionalism I had related a lot to how sensitive my system is to taking my Psych meds on a strict time schedule. The changes I made for a week effected my mood, and now after 11 days, I can say I've officially settled down. Moodiness may not be a big deal to some people, but when you have bipolar disorder, you learn to tune in to all the little things, to be sure you catch a depression or mania before it gets full blown. I believe I'm out of the woods. I can safely say that I wouldn't hesitate to make the trip again. This was a big test and I passed!

Also, I gained weight on the trip. Around 5 pounds, and I have lost all but 1 pound of it again. I'm super happy about that. It's taking discipline and getting back to my regular routine.

My sleep schedule finally righted itself, but it did take until yesterday to feel like I'm back on my regular schedule. It was definitely worse than the Spring Ahead, Fall Back time changes which are hard enough!

I've struggled with motivation to exercise, but I'm getting encouragement from my hubby and all of you. I got so darn much walking done in Hawaii that I'm having to do other things beside walking to keep my interest up.

I hope you all have a great night, and a sparking good Tuesday!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FRANCIE-N-BELLA 4/29/2012 8:39AM

    You are such a motivator!!!

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SPARKLED146 4/25/2012 6:54AM

    One step back, two steps forward! emoticon

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CHLOE-D-CALICO 4/24/2012 6:19PM

    I am so glad you got the meds back under contol I know how important that is.Great job on losing that weight

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_JODI404 4/23/2012 10:52PM

    Wooo~Hooo Lori!!!! I *KNEW* you would get that weight right back off!
I just knew it.

Congrats on all these wonderful happenings~ feeling emotionally calm and re-settled; weight just one pound to go!; and being back on track with sleeping. Sleep is HUGE in our success. I think far too many people underestimate the power of getting truly awesome sleep.

I'm pretty sure you'll be back in the exercise groove pretty quickly too. I know you like to see that pedometer registering at least 10,000! emoticon

Great update! I hope you have a great week ahead!

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REDHATSHAPELY1 4/23/2012 9:14PM

    It's great to know that you have learned to make your needs a priority and that you
are getting back on track after a big trip. It's so easy to let one little change in our routine lead to getting completely off track and yet thinking it doesn't matter. But it does! Congrats for being such a good example for others!

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BJPENNY70 4/23/2012 8:00PM

    It's great you got a handle on so much. You are a strong person. I still have problems with my sleep. I have had insomnia for many years. I have been doing some better with it, though. I bet your trip was magnificent. Jet Lag will get the best of us. I went to California to visit a friend several years ago. That was the first time I experienced Jet Lag. Not fun! I am so glad you shed that weight right back off. You should be very proud of yourself with all these accomplishments. Keep it up, girl. You are doing great! emoticon emoticon

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