Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Had an appointment with my Dr today to check BP and get a lab sheet. My BP was great! 116/60. Walking and losing weight must be doing a lot of good! Tomorrow I should go to the lab to get my fasting cholesterol test done. It usually runs around 200, but was up a little last time, 5 months ago.
Have had some thoughts about my goals. At church this week, I got a motivation to not be so wrapped up in what others thought about my body. That's not what the talk was about, but I did get an impression that the way I put so much focus on my weight and how I think others are thinking about me is not relevant to the big picture of my life. Yes, taking care of my body and treating it with care is vital. Taking care of the body that God gave me is important to him. But I don't need to be focused on my weight since I am in a healthy range. My BF% is on target, and I'm feeling strong. I'm happy with my weight. Sure a few more pounds could go, but I'm deciding whether that is as important to me as eating well and keeping fit.
I will probably go on tracking food since I have done that since the year 2000. It's a habit that keeps me honest about what I'm putting in my body and helps me see where I can improve if I start gaining back the lost weight. Is that being obsessive? I don't have the confidence that I can guess or instinctively eat at an appropriate level. How many of you plan to continue to track food after you lose the weight? How do you effectively do that? I'd love to know.
I don't want to have in the back of my mind the thought that "if I continue to eat well, and exercise, I will probably lose more weight." Then I will get all wrapped up in that facet which I'm trying to avoid. My husband actually said I should keep trying to reach my goal. When I started SP I set my goal at 140. Then as I started to lose, I got greedy and wanted to get skinnier. As you get older. skinny may not look good on everybody. I'm talking about model skinny. A fit person has muscles, not bulk but I mean is filled out in just the right places. My adjusted goal became 130 and now I'm thinking of readjusting it to 140 or 135 at the lowest.
I tried to think about whether I'm just settling and feeling ready to quit losing out of being weary of hoping every week that I've lost another pound. But I think everyone needs to come to the point where she or he is happy with the progress they've made and with the person they've become. I finally can look in the mirror and see a normal body. One that is taken care of. I no longer am letting myself go, as I had been.
The new me cares what goes into my mouth and has developed healthy habits. It's normal for me to consume what I used to consider mass quantities of water. I don't obsess over the scale, I responsibly get on weekly to keep myself in check. To top it off I don't get down on myself if I don't lose or if I have a slight fluctuation.
I think I'll be ok now. I'll keep Sparking. I want to enjoy this family. I want to be encouraged and be an encourager.
A note to those who have prayed for my friend Coan, who's leg was crushed by a car; She is now in Rehab after having had three surgeries. She's getting her sense of humor back and I've seen her getting back on Facebook. I went to see her twice, and am encouraged to see her looking better. She has a long road ahead of her. But I thank you for your prayers and concern.
Wednesday, March 07, 2012
Just a note to update you on Coan's progress. She had surgery Monday to get plates and screws put in her femur. The dr was pleased with how well she's healing, but after surgery she had a hard time breathing and ended up with pneumonia. I visited her this morning, and found her to be really out of it. I had called and asked her if she wanted any visitors, and she said yes, but once I got there she was having difficulties, and I only stayed a few minutes so she could rest.
She is a fellow Sparker. She hadn't been on in a few months, but what does that matter in the grand scheme of things?
I am sad for her and trust that God will answer our prayers for her and her family.
Thank you for your continued support
Monday, March 05, 2012
I was off track since Saturday. Ever since I heard about my friend Coan's accident. While I was off track it felt like I was messing up for a week rather than just those two days. The days seemed endless, when my mood was "off" and my eating and effort to exercise sucked. But they were only TWO DAYS!
I can do this. I can get it back together. I woke up with resolve to move on. My weight was up a little, but I'm not going to let that get me down. I can get back to my healthy lifestyle and continue on making progress, and I WILL reach my goals.
Today, so far I'm
ON TRACK with water: 12 glasses by 2:oo pm.
ON TRACK with exercise: had a 30 minute swim and the motivation to get my walk after typing this.
ON TRACK with ST: I've done 4 sets of 55 push-ups, as well as some planks, crunches, bicep curls, etc.
ON TRACK with my pedometer: about 45oo steps so far, almost half of my goal for the day.ON TRACK with eating: no sweets yet, (I allow 1 per day so I won't binge) Calories, between 550 and 900 left for the day, which is great considering it's date night and we'll eat out.
ON TRACK with my sleep: had my usual 9 hrs last night.
ON TRACK with mood: I'm not down or lacking motivation. I'm feeling great!
Here I go, Off to take a walk!
Saturday, March 03, 2012
I got such horrifying news yesterday that I actually nearly passed out. I never react so strongly to news like this and I never had something like this happen to someone I feel so much love for.
My young friend, in her 20s, was at an IHop waiting outside for her dad. A car (put in forward instead of reverse,) jumped the curb and sidewalk and pinned her to the wall!!! She almost lost her leg. She has had two surgeries by now, but I just heard about it at work, where I know her from. The girls there were like "didn't you hear what happened to Coan?" and then they told me. That's when I had a strong emotional reaction.
I hurt for her and will go see her now that she's out of ICU. I will feel better once I see her, I think. Please pray for her to get full use of her leg. She has a wedding planned for next spring, just started grad school and just started a new job as a deputy clerk at the courthouse.
I just had to share all that with people who care about me.
The repercussions of this were that I, at 9:30 last night on my way home from work, got chick-fil-a chicken strips and a shake. I had already had all I needed calorie wise for the day. I never eat at night, and I certainly didn't need it. Emotional eating at it's worst. I slept fine, though I would normally get heartburn from an indiscretion like that. I woke up in less than 8 hrs and couldn't stop thinking about Coan. She's a strong girl, and has faith, so I'm sure she'll be alright. But I woke up with an attitude of "who cares" about my breakfast. I ste some of my usual, minus the protein in yogurt I usually have. I've had 6 glasses of water by 8 o'clock. That's a good sign. I took a 5 minute walk, then it started raining so I walked 5 more min. to get home. 10 minute walk that started out to be planned for 30. I'm in a funk.
I'm thinking about what I can bring to her when I visit her this afternoon. Something from Hallmark, since I have to work today until 3:30.
Love that girl...
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