It is not really about the loss but about the gain!

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Today was a revelation to me. I recently returned from a two week vacation where I was certain that I had lost weight. My pants were loose and falling down making it a sure sign to me. I had been at the beach and walked each morning 2.8 miles to the nearest dock and then back again. Sometimes I did it more than once. I had three active grandchildren with me (ages 7,9,10) who were up with me at the crack of dawn and went to bed with me either 10, 11 or 12 at night (it was just the four of us alone). We were on the beach in the surf, playing, running, digging until mid afternoon when we took a break for lunch. Sometimes we went sightseeing (one was a lighthouse with 203 steps going up and then down again). We were always in motion. If we weren't sightseeing we'd be at the time share's pool for the late afternoon and evening (again always in motion). Not once did the tv come on or any other electronic device. I had planned my meals ahead of time for at the time share and for going out so there shouldn't have been too many surprises. Imagine my surprise when I got home and discovered I had gained a pound. This truly disturbed me. Then a coach of mine from the YMCA aerobics class spoke with me. Did you know that muscle weighs more than fat? Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! lol I had lost almost an entire inch off each thigh and my waist. I have to go shopping for new pants. Imagine that! lol I not only gained a pound, but precious bonds and memories with my grandchildren. I gained self confidence and I gained knowledge and wisdom along the way. Even part of new wardrobe was gained. I gained support and respect from my YMCA exercise groups and staff as well as my Spark people. I love this kind of gain! Life can be so good! Keep smiling Sunshine, and keep gaining!

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MEADSBAY 8/19/2009 9:07PM

Also, our weight can fluctuate 2-3-4 pounds for hormonal or sodium reasons so weigh yourself a few days in a row and pick your favorite. elizabeth Report Inappropriate Comment

KEAKMAN 8/1/2009 9:23PM

Now you know the secret! It's less about the scale and more about how your clothes fit and how much better you feel about yourself! Congrats! Report Inappropriate Comment

WISTFULVISTA 7/31/2009 11:13PM

That's the right attitude, Loretta! I can see you've gained a little muscle on your vacation...and a LOT of wisdom! Report Inappropriate Comment

ALMMOM 7/30/2009 10:03PM

Excellent. Yep, muscle weighs more!!!! It was neat you cold enjoy your grandkids. Report Inappropriate Comment

A plea for prayer and a fresh tomorrow ...

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Yesterday I attended a wake for a young man of 24 years. I watched him grow up from a young child into a responsible and caring man. He spent many days and nights at my house with one of his best buddies (my youngest son). I had been his babysitter, Sunday School and Vacation Bible School Teacher for over half his life. He played paint ball in my yard, raced up and down my stairs, and licked beaters in my kitchen. He became a friend as he entered adulthood. He had hearing aides since childhood but was in good health other than that. So we thought. In the middle of the night he had an aneurysm in his heart and died physically alone in his new apartment. I have been feeling a great loss as if he were my own. I am having actual physical pain. I have lost many close family and friends in my life. But for some reason I can't seem to relate to the feelings I am having now. The tears keep coming and I have little control of myself. God forgive me for I feel weak and unable to function as if I were under an evil spell. I have tried to stay in my routine of exercise and Bible study but have been unable to focus. I nearly ran off the road today and am now afraid to drive anywhere. Someone please pray for me because it doesn't seem to be working for me by myself. Perhaps I will sleep tonight and awaken fresh and focused tomorrow.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ANGELLYN 7/30/2009 10:10PM

I too was touched by your post Loretta. Your response is natural not over blown at all given that this death was so totally unexpected and happened to someone the age of your beloved son. Sometimes past grief also comes up and we just plain need to let it all hang out so to speak. I hope you will let yourself grieve fully in whatever way calls to you. Be good to yourself during this time and don't forget that exercise is a great way to deal with anger and sadness. Report Inappropriate Comment

MOMMY242009 7/29/2009 10:12PM

Loretta my heart goes out to you in your time of need. I know the pain of having someone so close to you pass, and my only words are wisdom are pray. The Lord will help you through this.Lean on those close to you. You can help each other remember the good times you had. I know te pain will never truly go away, but it will become bareable, Please know that you are in my thoughts and prays. Hugs we ae here fot you. Report Inappropriate Comment

SNOWYOWL56 7/29/2009 9:43PM

Cry your tears and don't try to make yourself stop. Grief deepens you. Read to this young man something beautiful and out loud. For the next 10 days allow yourself to focus on his passing, praying for him and speaking out loud to him. I know a song: When you were born you cried and the world rejoiced. Leave your life-soul that when you die the world cries and you rejoice. Blessings to you. Report Inappropriate Comment

The best and worst of vacation ... ?

Saturday, July 25, 2009

I just got back from a two week vacation at the beach in Florida. There was family from Texas, and several from around Florida. The best of the vacation was "family". The worst of the vacation was "family". Go figure? Can anyone relate to that one? LOL

  

My heart is not in it

Thursday, July 02, 2009

I am known as the "Sunshine" lady or teacher. I am a morning person and love to shine in the beginning and throughout the day. Whenever persons I know are in crisis they seem to come to me always. I don't usually solve anything but I do listen and try to be encouraging. I took my granddaughter to an open house with me and introduced her to some adults I know. One of the people there said to her that they hate me because I am just too bubbly in the morning and always have to have something nice to say even when things are sad. My granddaughter told them that they were right about me being bubbly and nice but that is why so many people want to be around me. It really hurt me that an adult would say what they did to a nine year old child. They may have thought it funny but it really wasn't to me. Yet I was so proud of my granddaughter and how lovely she handled herself. It has seemed to me that a lot of people around me seem to think they can say whatever they want and because of my personality it is okay. Or maybe just because society today has desensitised them. Well I'm here to say "It is NOT okay!"Just because I have a positive outlook does not make bad manners okay. It is my habit to use the "Golden Rule" (treat others as you would want to be treated). There seems to be a climate today that life is all about "ME" and nothing else matters. Everywhere I look and am someone is slamming me in the face with rude, crude and insensitive. I'm tired of it! I'm weary of it! I love being the "Sunshine Lady" but my heart is not in it the same anymore. A young man I don't know came up to me a couple days ago (while I was in the middle of an aerobics class) and pretended to kick me in the behind. He then said "Hey grandma, shake that booty! What a target!" This teenager had just slid into the back of the gym when no one was looking with a couple of friends. No one heard what he said but myself. My reply to him, not missing a step, was "Quit being rude and stay out of my way, I am in a class!" He and his friends left. It unnerved me. Not because of what he did but because of what I did. Granted what I said was warranted but the curt tone and manner that I addressed him is foreign to me. The "Sunshine" Lady's heart is just not in it anymore! I feel I have lost myself and am feeling discouraged like I've not felt in many many years. This is so ironic since my last blog was about being happy with yourself and not relying on those around you to make you so. Funny, .... but not really. Perhaps it is time that I go back and read what I have written all along. Even the "Sunshine" lady can have a cloudy day ... or more. lol

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SONSHINE1948 7/28/2009 10:32PM

Continue to be yourself. Perhaps the lady did not mean that in a critial way. She may have meant it as a compliment by saying she was jealous. She probably regards you highly because you are what she'd like to be. Keep being cheerful and kind. You will draw others to youself and in the long run point the way to Jesus. Report Inappropriate Comment

DOLPHINNUT 7/6/2009 8:08PM

Hi! Sorry you have to put up with those things. Its hard when people make fun of you but if we give up we are just hurting ourselves, not them. There are some people that I know that make fun of me a lot, an adult male and his teenage children, they can be very rude some times and its frustrating. I can't get away from these people because of my job and I just got really mad one day and told him "I can lose the weight, you will always be a jerk." Not very nice I know but like I said they can be very frustrating and you should have seen his daughters jaw drop and her eyes got as big as saucers. They haven't been as bad since then and for that I am thankful. As far as people saying you are too bubbly, I would prefer to be around someone like that than someone who is rude and obnoxious. I used to have people tell me that I smiled too much so I started trying to quit smiling so much and then people started asking me if I was tried or having a bad day soooooo what gives, I guess we can only be ourselves no matter what. Your granddaughter sounds like a very mature young lady, maybe she gets it from Grandma!! I hope you keep that sunshine attitude!!!!!! Comment edited on: 7/6/2009 8:16:44 PM Report Inappropriate Comment

MOMMAGRAMMY 7/5/2009 10:15AM

I don't normally read other people's blogs or comment much but something drew me to yours and I have to comment. I'm dealing with a similar thing. I've always wanted to be thought of as the nice person and through circumstances where I finally stood up for myself, I'm realizing that some of my neighbors are possibly upset with me. Speaking up for myself does not come naturally and I find myself going over my own words and feeling horrible, even if I was justified. My story isn't important but I wanted you to know I am feeling the same way as you and yet I think it's important for you to be true to yourself. You like being the Sunshine Lady and, if others are jealous of you or just have an ornery streak, shine on! Report Inappropriate Comment

CHAIRUL 7/3/2009 10:25PM

Keep being yourself Sunshine!!! WE NEED YOU!!!! I know what you mean though...I drive down the road singing to the radio on a beautiful day and people in the car beside me at a red light make faces and give me the finger. I gave them the deaf "I love you" sign. They drove off without knowing how to respond to that. Just be true to your own values...and remember the quote from Abraham Lincoln..."If you look for the bad in people-you shall surely find it". There's a ton more nice people out there than yukky ones. Report Inappropriate Comment

GONE2BEACH101 7/2/2009 11:01PM

I am so sorry you had to put up with those rude remarks. There is no need of that!! Your grand daughter was right in what she said and KUDOS to her for being honest and polite!! And to you for speaking out!! Don't lose your positive attitude for the words of a few....My favorite saying is. "I refuse to do a battle of wits with an unarmed person." Report Inappropriate Comment

You can be happy ...

Monday, June 29, 2009

If you don't like yourself there is nothing in the world that will make you happy. Don't look for others to change to improve your life. You will be sadly disappointed. You have the power to change yourself and no one else can do that for you. If you want to change it can happen. If you don't want to change it won't. Definitely look to others for encouragement and support but remember that when it comes down to it, it is all up to you. Don't look at how far you have to go but how far you have come. Every journey starts with that first step, so make up your mind and start. Baby steps to begin and grow. You can be happy ... if you choose to be so.