The moment that changed everything..

Monday, April 29, 2013

There is a picture that my daughter took of me. I was in the kitchen, and when I saw the picture...it was the moment that changed everything. For the last year, I'd been wishy washy with weight loss. I'd tried to get back into WW but, quit twice. I tried SparksPeople...then quit. I felt defeated. I felt overwhelmed. I felt that maybe 250lbs wasn't THAT bad, and then I saw that picture.

Call it denial, but I'd removed the full length mirrors in my house. So, just seeing my head..I didn't think that my weight has really gotten that out of control. When I saw the picture, I was shocked, horrified, and MOTIVATED. I refuse to look like this, feel like this at 40.

I rejoined WW. My weight was 243.5. The first week, I lost 6lbs. The second 2.5lbs. This week, I was down 3lbs. My goal is to lose weight EVERY week, no matter how small...I'm determined the scale will go down.

I watched a video where the trainer said to say "I am (first and last name) and I am going to weight (blank amount) by (Monday..it's my weigh in day). You have to actually SAY it while you are working out, whispering is allowed, especially if you are in a busy gym! However, the louder the better...I have found that while I'm walking...this mantra makes me want to walk farther, to move faster. I become empowered, determined. Try it, it works.

I don't want to be 50..then 60...then 70 if Lord willing I live that long...and still battling my weight. I've decided to cut my portions, but eat what I really want. Move in some capacity everyday, most days it's walking..but I just started a beginner's Spin class that is fun. Weight loss isn't rocket science, it's about good choices, and a plan. It's about knowing in yourself that the time is NOW..not tomorrow, not next month...it's NOW. It's about realizing that it's an on-going forever process, not a diet to be abandoned in a month.

Like I said, that moment changed everything...it changed me. It changed how I look at myself, what I want for myself and for those people that love me. It changed my mindset and that is really where weight loss starts.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MICHELELYNN777 4/30/2013 7:38AM

Your motivation is contagious! With your determination, you will reach your goal before you know it! Congrats on your success so far! Report Inappropriate Comment

KONRAD695 4/29/2013 11:34PM

A new commitment to weight loss. " I'm there too" Many of us had to go through a few of these. Glad you're back here, and best of luck to you. One ounce a day is 23 pounds a year. Just keep taking that little bit every day. Keep talking to yourself, you're the best cheerleader you've got. There are all these tricks to do, just pick what works and stay with them. Fist we build our habits- Then our habits build us. Sorry this is quick, short, and choppy. Doing it quick at work. Report Inappropriate Comment

LESLEE33 4/29/2013 11:20PM

Well it sounds like your in a much better place now, and really taking the correct steps to make life long changes. I wish you all the best! Report Inappropriate Comment

FENWAYGIRL18 4/29/2013 11:15PM

I'm glad your daughter unknowingly opened your eyes with that picture , someday you can tell her that she was the reason that made mommy think healthier and move more so she could enjoy you longer! Good Luck sounds like your doing great keep it up! Report Inappropriate Comment

SHELLEYWILSONAZ 4/29/2013 11:12PM

Keep it up! It's posts like these that inspire me to keep moving. Report Inappropriate Comment

RENATA144 4/29/2013 11:10PM

You are beautiful . Report Inappropriate Comment

The hardest part is the first step

Thursday, November 15, 2012

I can think of 1000 reasons why I shouldn't get on the treadmill...I can literally put it off for hours, with valid excuses. I can tell myself that I'll do it later, that I'll do it tomorrow..that I'm too tired, to irritated, too busy.

However, once I actually put on my shoes and take that first step..then I'm in it to win it baby!! I get my music pumpin' and my feet moving and suddenly, I wonder why I tried to talk myself out of it.

I will admit, I'm not actually a "happy" exerciser...if you try to talk to me while I'm in the middle of my workout, chances are..I will bite your head off. Because, I hate stopping and then trying to rebuild that momentum/motivation...so my family knows that life or limb best be at risk if they interrupt me! lol

I need to remember that even if I don't feel like it..do it anyway. It's a sparkpeople reminder that I got on my cell phone one day and it really stuck with me. I just also need to remember that the first step is the hardest, but once it's finished and I'm done...I'm glad I did it, I feel a sense of accomplishment and dare I say it..happiness.

Like most things..the hardest part is getting started, but once you get going..nothing can stop you!

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUSUSUZZZIE 11/17/2012 10:58PM

Taking that first step to put the shoes on and get on the treadmill IS the hardest step of all. Good for you for getting it done! Report Inappropriate Comment

LORIMAR42 11/15/2012 9:54PM

It is easy to put things off I know. I keep putting off walking. Report Inappropriate Comment

KATRINAKRAUT 11/15/2012 9:54PM

Rock it! Not everybody loves to exercise but everybody likes the way they feel AFTER they exercise! Sigh.... Report Inappropriate Comment

Trickle down effect..

Monday, October 15, 2012

Today, I was tracking my blood pressure after my recent health scare..and my 13 year old daughter asked me to take hers as well. The results were rather startling...her number was slightly above the "normal" range. I realized then and there, that there is a trickle down effect.

My daughter is 4" taller than I am..and weighs almost 200lbs. She is so tall that she doesn't look overweight, howevever I realized that I am setting her on an unhealthy path. I have decided to make changes to MY health...but, what I need to do is make changes for my FAMILY'S health.

When there isn't junk food in the house, the kids will eat hummus and pita...apples and pears. They will eat what I serve and I am going to make sure that everything I serve is going to benefit not only me, but my family as well. I don't want to pass my struggles with weight/health on to my children.

So, I have more motivation than ever before. As a mother, I will do things for my children that I won't do for myself...well this time, I'm going to do it for all of us.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IAM_HIS2 10/26/2012 12:56PM

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KONRAD695 10/16/2012 1:31PM

Great plans for the family. I have a couple ideas that might help, they worked wonders in my household. First is "Wellness Wednesday", (kids named this one). Pick one day of the week and make it a fitness day. We do NO soda, candy, fast food, fried, fattening, ...etc... Activities focus around movement like cleaning, laundry, walking dogs, yard work, parks, museums, or whatever takes movement. Everyone sleeps great and wakes up feeling good the next day. Second idea is "Help With Health". This spawned from my total elimination diet (gluten problems) and me trying to get healthier. I exposed my kids to some food info like TED Talks, Fork over Knives, and healthy lifestyle articles. Then informed them that I had to do this and I needed "Their Help" for me to get it done. So one days worth of food has to be my diet. I broke up the breakfast, lunch, dinner onto different days. Children want to be good and help, so they did. In turn, I got to expose them to many different foods and healthy choices. Turns out that they like about 80% of it and didn't even know. Maybe these ideas can help transition the family into a leaner, healthier, happier group. Best of luck to you. Report Inappropriate Comment

DEDE824 10/16/2012 10:04AM

Great insight! You'd like for them to live long, healthy lives! Report Inappropriate Comment

SUSUSUZZZIE 10/16/2012 6:31AM

Awesome blog and great plans to help yourself and your family! Report Inappropriate Comment

NANCYRUBIO 10/15/2012 11:58PM

Beautiful to read. on your plans for your family. Report Inappropriate Comment

Hospital wake up call..

Saturday, October 13, 2012

So, I spent the last two days in the hospital with a health scare. In the ER..I was poked and prodded numerous times as they tried to take blood from my chunky arms. Being fat makes it harder to take blood apparently, they have a more difficult time judging on how deep the vein is...which results in multiple sticks and a whole lot of digging around with a needle! OUCH!!

One of the things I learned was...after numerous tests and I'm pretty sure thousands of dollars....my cholesteral is almost 500...FIVE HUNDRED!!

I decided..laying in that bed, miserable...fat...unhealthy..that I am done. I am absolutely and unequivically DONE with being fat. Life is too short to spend it wishing for a better body...wishing for the ability to walk up a flight of stairs without gasping for breath..and a million other things that being overweight causes me to miss out on. I'm tired of being embarrassed, tired, sick....I'm tired of being fat. I've never felt such a feeling of NO MORE, than I did that night.

So, today..I decided to use what I've learned from all those diets...all the books I've read on how to lose weight...what I know about my body, and change my lifestyle. Not to fit in smaller jeans, but to be healthy enough to enjoy my children and eventually (in the future) my grandchildren!

I am not changing anything but portion size. Instead of eating off a dinner plate, I'm eating off a salad plate. I am keeping only healthy snacks in the house. I dusted off my treadmill. I'm going to be AWARE of what I'm eating, because being aware of what is going in your mouth is half the battle right there. I have been down the path of mindless eating, you know where you don't remember eating something 10 minutes after you put it in your mouth.

I did do one thing that I've never done before..I bought a Ninja Professional Blender. My breakfast is now going to consist of Vanilla Soy Milk, Almonds, Flaxseed, kiwi, spinach, frozen berry smoothie. (There are tons of recipes for them, so anyone can find at least one that they love!) This is about improving my HEALTH not just getting skinny.

I am going to let go of my self doubt...I'm going to let go of my negativity...I am going to let go of punishing myself with food. It doesn't have to be complicated, it doesn't have to be miserable...it just requires knowing that things have to change and that you are prepared for them to change. When that moment strikes, I think you just know it...everything is different, it's not about motivation...it's about a feeling. It's a feeling of I AM READY. I hope today, you are ready too. Let's go on this journey together.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUSUSUZZZIE 10/13/2012 11:33PM

I'm so sorry you've had to go through such a terrible experience. Sometimes we have to hit a really bad bottom before we can move up and it sounds like you were there and you have some great plans to get healthy! Like my dear SparkTwin CRISSA1669, I too was on the verge of health problems and it has taken a lot of work but it has been well worth it. I know that this fight will never truly be over but I am worth it and I'm prepared to keep fighting. You are also worth it! I love that you set small goal to start! Soon you'll see the results those changes are making and it will help motivate you to keep going. On days when you don't feel motivated, just try to do it anyway and know that the motivation will come back. Report Inappropriate Comment

CRISSA1669 10/13/2012 9:36PM

I am wishing you the best with this weight loss journey.......unfortunately sometimes it does take health scare to move us in the right direction....but I'm telling you right now, it will be worth all of the effort you put in... I was 273 pounds last year March, I didn't have any health problem........yet, but I know they were coming...so I practiced portion control, tracked my food consistently(still do) and exercised like it was going out of style...about 100 pounds later...I've changed my life, gained stamina, fitness and muscles on top of all the superficial benes like new clothes and boots and wearing layers...you really can change your life...one day at a time, one choice at a time!!! Go for it!! Report Inappropriate Comment

LINOVER 10/13/2012 9:25PM

Hang in there! Report Inappropriate Comment

KSCHRAUT 10/13/2012 8:32PM

You can do it! Report Inappropriate Comment

ALIHIKES 10/13/2012 2:54PM

I am so sorry for your health scare. That cholesterol number is very frightening. You CAN make the changes you need to lose weight and be healthier. I haven't lost all the weight -- but weight is down. And more important, my cholesterol is better, and my blood sugar is no longer borderline. Report Inappropriate Comment

DEDE824 10/13/2012 9:43AM

Sorry you had to take a trip to the ER, but it will be worth it since that has motivated you to change. Remember you are doing this for your HEALTH, and it will change your whole life. We're supporting you! And I love your background pic! Report Inappropriate Comment

Weight gain :/

Saturday, September 29, 2012

So, I gained 3.5lbs last week....ugh. I knew it was going to happen, I hadn't counted my points. I just want to stop my guilt relationship with my food. I eat it..then I feel guilty about it. I beat myself up over that second helping, or why I didn't choose a salad instead. I am so sick of of regretting everything I put in my mouth. I am want to have a HEALTHY relationship with food.

I don't know what it is..but, if I make something and there are leftovers, I keep going back until it's gone. I have no idea why I do this, I know it's not normal. I know that no one is going to take food from me, so why can't I just eat until I'm satisfied and then stop.

I'm sick of the struggle..but, honestly...if this is my biggest struggle then I should consider myself blessed. I think about what other people go through in their lives and I think if my biggest problem right now is my weight, then I'm lucky, because I can change it...I can...I will.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KSCHRAUT 9/29/2012 7:39PM

You will get there! Report Inappropriate Comment

YOBOELI 9/29/2012 1:11AM

It's hard until you can take it one day at a time take it one meal at a time one snack at a time. If you dont keep it in the house you wont see it then you wont want it. Good Luck I know that it is difficult. Take it easy on yourself. Just start over it will get better Report Inappropriate Comment