Thursday, March 29, 2012
I'm barely hanging in there.
I mean barely.
This week has been a huge struggle with me. I have had huge family drama. I got into a stupid argument with my sisters and nieces. It was stupid, I didn't cause it, and I am not going to apologize for something I didn't cause. Then I found out that my boyfriend who is the breadwinner, by a landslide in my house, is going to lose his job within a year. The factory he works for is closing and moving to Alabama. He has heard rumors that they are going to offer him double his salary now to move and work at the new factory. I say no. I have lived here all my life, my entire family is here, my friends are here, and all my children's friends are here. We know nothing and no one in Alabama and I refuse to move. The company is also rumored to give him a nice severance package, but he is only thinking about the money he would be making if he takes the AL job, and not how such a move would affect us all. It's been stressful, and caused 2 arguments so far, and I am really not looking forward to the next few months.
Plus, it's TOM.
I have started reading Joyce Meyer's "The Battlefield of The Mind" and I am really trying to rid myself of negative thoughts. I am also trying very hard to study the Bible everyday and make God a part of my daily life, through bible study, and prayer.
I also am job hunting for a teaching job. It takes a great deal of time to search, fill out applications, contact superintendents and Principals, put together and distribute your portfolio....It's endless.
It's soccer season, and I have been gone 3 nights this week in addition to working during the day, which means my house looks like a tornado went through it. :
I also am wanting to start writing again. Not just in my little blog here, but to write down the stories I have bouncing around in my head.
On top of that, I am a mother to 4 kids.
I am feeling overwhelmed and don't know how to deal with all this stress....and workout too!
My food intake has been horrible. I have been eating out more since I am not at home as much and I haven't always make the best choices.
My goal for the next week is to make better choices, workout more, stay on plan, and be here every single day!
Monday, February 27, 2012
I have been off track for the last week.
Follow-up: I went to the doctor and was indeed diagnosed with exercise induced asthma thanks to my newly found allergies. I have no insurance, so my doctor had me fill out papers for a program from Merck that will provide my medications (An inhaler, singualair, Nasonex) for free. I still haven't heard back from them or received any medication. Last week I got really sick. My head hurt, had a horrible runny nose and head congestion. At first I thought I was getting the flu, but it turns out it's my horrid allergies! I found some really, old, nasonex of mine in the medicine cabinet and I have taken a few of my son's singulair to feel better. (I have to get my singulair soon so I can replace my son's meds.) I am doing better though I still have the runny nose and occasional headache. Having no insurance and being "poor" sucks!
So for most of last week I did nothing. I didn't track my food most days and because I felt bad I ate comfort foods. I haven't weighed because I am sure I gained. I am getting back on track today and making sure I run and do 30 Day shred, and stick to my diet so that I can get below 220 before Friday.
Hoping that I can get my motivation back. I have been sooooo unmotivated. I have noticed my lack of motivation has been in line with my lax in reading weight loss themed books, stories, and magazines. Need to find some on my Kindle today!
I am also starting my new job hunt. Year #3 trying to get a teaching job. WIsh me luck!
Have a great day Sparkers!
Tuesday, February 07, 2012
It's been awhile since I have blogged. Don't know why I haven't...it just hasn't happened. Basically I have been doing well. I am down to 224.4 pounds. I have been doing my best to stick to my diet. I have been following my C25K running plan and have started 30 Day Shred.
Last night was Wk3 D1 of C25k. Basically for a part of the workout time last night, we had to double our running time which SUUUUCCCCKKKEEEDDD. Well I noticed while I was running, even during the walking portion, I was having a hard time catching my breath. I finished the workout just as planned and went back home to do 30 day Shred. I could barely do it. I felt awful. I was wheezing some. I have had small bouts of exercise induced asthma (I self diagnosed) before. But this was the worst yet. I really felt like I was sucking air through a straw. Afterwards I was so tired and MEAN (I didn't sleep well the night before) that I blessed my family with an early bedtime for myself, took 2 melatonin, and went to sleep. This morning my back, near my right shoulder blade feels as if it is in knots, and it hurts through to the front of my chest. I am not sure if it's from my wheezing workout last night or if it's from the way I slept. (I sleep on my sides which put a lot of strain on my shoulders. I have had problems with that before.) I have taken 2 ibuprofen, and am trying to work through it, but it's no fun at all.
I have no health insurance so I am going to make an appointment with the free clinic (Which is run with the help of my own doctor) and see what they can do for me about this exercise induced asthma. I don't want this to stop me from working out, or to hurt my workouts in anyway.
So I am pretty bummed...
I am in 2 different Biggest loser competitions. One is with my family and I am pretty sure I am not winning it, and the other is with one of the schools I work at and I am pretty sure I am not winning that one either. Lol! Aunt Flo is visiting again and I blew my diet yesterday, so I have to be extra vigilant with what I eat the next three days to make sure I lose weight again on Friday for BL Competiton #2.
Workout today is suppose to be strength training. I feel like such crap, i am not sure I will get it in. I will do what I can do and that's all I can do...
Everyone have a great day!
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