Thursday, February 25, 2010
After doing an extra long walk last night (for me), my legs are KILLING me! I have been wearing those new Shape Ups workout shoes for several weeks now whenever I go out walking, and they work those leg muscles just as much now as they did the first day I put them on. I know it's good for me, but I am sooooo sore. My husband says that the part of my leg that I have been complaining about all day is my quadricep. And although my calves don't hurt, I can REALLY feel them working during the walking. I am endlessly thankful for the fact that these shoes have all but eliminated my back pain when I walk (which is something that even the doctors failed at), but it makes the rest of your lower body muscles work as if you're doing a marathon! They have been soooo worth the investment.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
I forced myself out the door again last night after dinner, and I even pushed past my comfort zone to do 40 minutes instead of my usual 20. I didn't do anything on Wednesday, because it was freezing cold and pouring rain.
While I was out walking last night, I came across a woman who was normal sized, pushing her baby in the stroller, and wearing a 10 pound weighted vest. I felt a little...defeated. But, I got over it quickly. A lot of people who weigh as much as I do either can't or don't make the effort to exercise. It isn't easy to put yourself out there in front of people. Some stare...a few snicker...I have been lucky so far in the fact that I haven't had anyone say anything negative to me. And I recognize that it is always very obvious how much I am struggling to keep moving. It doesn't take long for me to be panting like a dog and sweating bullets. The 20 somethings run circles around me. But that's ok. I could do that too when I was 20.
Monday, February 22, 2010
I did it! I walked around the block after dinner! You guys don't know what a big deal that is for me these days. AFter I wrote that last blog entry, I really started racking my brain about what was keeping from getting out the door to an evening walk after dinner. Aside from the general fatigue and lack of motivation that I have by that time of the day. I think I figured it out. I am a person that needs to go for that walk IMMEDIATELY after I finish eating. No down time, no letting my food go down. If I let my butt hit an even mildly comfortable surface like the couch, my bed, or my favorite chair...that's it. I am down for the count. So, as soon as I finished eating tonight, I got up before my husband and kids had even finished eating and headed out the door. It takes 20 minutes for me to walk around the block, and since I am 200 pounds overweight, it always feel like I am scaling the side of a mountain on my face! The unfortunate thing about never being successful at consistent weight loss is that exercise never gets any easier if you are always the same size. It has health benefits in general, but I don't feel like it's getting any less grueling. Sometimes I get a glimpse of my shadow as I am lumbering down the street at the pace of a toddler (which is all I can handle). And there are times when I start to think...what's the point? Why do this to myself? And the answer is always the same. I don't EVER want to be a person who wakes up one day and discovers that they can no longer take care of themselves or of anyone else for that matter. Those people would give any amount of food to be able to walk again, or go to the bathroom by themselves again, or have any resemblance at all of a normal life again. May that never be me.
Monday, February 22, 2010
I spent some time in recent months figuring out what would be the best times for me to go walking in order to keep weight gain at bay. Since weight loss itself has proven to be...elusive...I wanted to at least stop gaining. So, aside from the walk that I take every morning, I experimented with walking before dinner versus walking after dinner. When I walked before dinner, I sometimes still gained weight that day, depending on what I ate for dinner. But on the days when I walked after the evening meal, as long as that was the last thing I ate for the day, I rarely gained weight. The problem is my non existent energy level at that time of the day. I am always ok once I get out of the house and start walking, but forcing myself out the door is something else all together. I suppose it is as much a problem of motivation as it is with energy. Because I just can't seem to give myself that mental push that I so badly need. A while ago, I was doing the after dinner walks most days. I can't think of what happened to change that habit. So, how can I re-start this very necessary healthy habit?
Thursday, February 18, 2010
My daughter called me today after she took my 2 grandsons (ages 2 and 6 mos) to their doctor appointment. She was told that she needs to keep an eye on their weight, because they are on the high end of where they should be. I always tried to tell my daughter that the older one almost came out of the womb looking...husky. Not fat...but kind of like a shrunken football player. The baby, however, whom she has fed WAY too much from birth (even though up until now it has only been formula) is too big. He's adorable, and cute, and I love him dearly. But that child looks like the Michelin man in a diaper! She's about to start feeding him solid foods, so I warned her not to go crazy with it. I don't want the little guy to look like Jabba the Hut before he has his first birthday. I am hoping that as the boys get older and become more active that this won't be an issue. But my daughter is the type that feeds them whenever they act up in order to quiet them. I have tried to caution her against it, but like all young mothers, she doesn't really listen. Maybe she will now that the doctor has expressed concern about her children becoming the toddler equivalent of Sumo wrestlers before they even get into kindergarten.
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