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I Kicked My Own Butt This Week

Sunday, January 31, 2010

Yep, I did. And I am super proud of myself. I have been sort of off track since the wrist injury and it is still not perfectly healed. I did not do any weights or break any rules regarding the wrist, and I eased off on the stress I was putting on my hand when I felt the pressure seemed to great in spin. I even pulled back to back classes on Wednesday night for Spin and Spice It Up dance. (OMG, I was so tired by the end of that! I couldn't even manage to get on the floor for the last part of the dance routine the last time we did it.) But still this was much less effort put out than before the injury. Only 5 hours of exercise this week instead of the usual. This slacking (in my mind) in the exercise department meant I had to be extra diligent in the food area, which was complicated by the lack of funds for a variety of healthy foods. But I did it! And I have a loss of 2 pounds for the week to show for it. :)

I am not going to say it isn't tough. Between the random sub jobs that I may drive 45 minutes to at 6:30 in the morning, my boyfriend in treatment, doctors upon doctors visits, and the random stuff that happens when you own a house (oh how I sometimes miss having a landlord to call and tell them the problems to fix), it is not always easy making time for myself. But I am not that angry little dwarf named "Grumpy" as often when I do, and it is the time when I don't have to worry or think about anything but what I am doing in that moment. I think it is a glorious, even if I am a hot, sweaty mess!

That being said, I have started closing my eyes when I spin during certain routines. Instead of thinking of myself a hot, sweaty, chunky monkey, I imagine myself with a better body, seeing those parts that bug me reformed, trimmed and sculpted. I even imagine myself wearing clothing that last year at this time I would have never considered wearing. But things change don't they? I don't have to hide in clothes chosen to make me look thinner. Someday soon I will just be, wearing clothes I like, and not just because they make me look thinner and hide enough of the flaws. ;) I am even considering something new for Valentine's day, since I have so little that fits. R is taking me out...what to wear, what to wear LOL How nice to be excited to get dressed for a change!

But, I cannot wait for next week! I know it is going to be as good of a loss as this week, if not better. I just need to stay focused and think about that awesome dress I saw today in the boutique. It showed a lot of skin, and frankly I have too much skin that would be showing at the moment on the upper half of me. :) But by summer, I will be ready to wear that dress!

Until next time...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MISSSHAWN01 1/31/2010 1:24AM

    Isn't that feeling, of knowing you're ARE transforming your body, so wonderful?

I remember the first time I bought new clothes. I'll admit... I was a 22/24... the next time I actually purchased new clothes, I had to buy a 16!! I was soooo afraid of shopping. I was terrified!!

Now, I am still nervous about trying on clothes, because I never know what's going to fit... but at least I know I'll never be back where I started!!

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My Best Intentions Were A Bust

Thursday, January 21, 2010

I tried, really I did. I wanted more than anything to make this week my "power up" week, getting everything back on track. After my injury, I got cleared to do everything but weights. Last week I made it 3 days to the gym. This week the goal was all 5 days, 6 classes, and just have a blast doing what I love. When I couldn't work out, I got really bad headaches. I checked B.P. etc. and it was all fine. Apparently my body got so used to working out, it became physically painful by the third week to not do it. I really wanted this week.

I made it to the gym Monday and Tuesday with no problems. I had a blast at spin, pushing myself and sweating a small bucket. By yesterday the storm had hit hard. My intention was to hit my back to back classes of spin and Spice It Up, my dance class. But my roof leaked into my spare bedroom, my door knob broke (momentarily locking me in my house) and the bathroom door actually fell off it's hinges. Oh, the joys of home ownership! So long gym.

Interestingly and quite proudly I can say I did not turn to food. I turned to cleaning. Yea me! I even rearranged my big room (giant conjoined living room, dining, kitchen area). I have not lost any weight, but my 8s are loose on me. Not sure what is going on there, but I am not complaining...yet. ;) So last night the plan was to go early, since all the buckets are in place and diversions to funnel water correctly, etc.

I awoke to snow. Okay, go now, I thought, before it gets anyworse. I figured I could hit the grocery store, etc. before getting snowed in. Yeah, no such luck. The car was frozen. :( All dressed up and no where to go. But I'm still smiling. God is keeping me safe at home for a reason.

So what did I learn? Sometimes even when you make time and plan it all out, it just doesn't work out. You just have to do your best and continue your eating plan. It's not the end of the world; there is always tomorrow and always next week. Just because mother nature is stopping me this time, I am not going to give up on my goal or on myself. There's no throwing in the towel and tossing back the chocolate and soda for me! I am still in the race with myself to be the best me I can be. My status is just postponed due to weather. ;) But when the sun comes out, you can bet I'll be off and spinning... or dancing!


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JENNIFER0807 1/21/2010 3:15PM

    yea i thought the same thing everyone else did...that inspite of every plan seeming to fall apart you kept yourself in good spirits. Next week will be better!

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HHILDE99 1/21/2010 2:50PM

    You have a great attitude! I hope the sun comes out soon for you!

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DRAGONFLY_RUN 1/21/2010 2:41PM

    Awesome attitude. emoticon Sending some sunshine your way.

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OFORTUNA 1/21/2010 2:38PM

    I love your attitude! And like you said, your reactions to having your plans thrown off are victories in themselves. Congratulations! emoticon

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THOMS1 1/21/2010 2:37PM

    Good Attitude!! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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I Have Been Spinning Wrong...But It Paid Off :)

Thursday, January 14, 2010

So yes, I am a dork. That lovely little tension knob where you are supposed to turn it one way and then turn it back to your correct amount to start (generally newbs start at 1 1/2 and then move to 2 turns and so on), I have been doing the opposite. My b.f. informed me of that today. I was closing it all the way (tension full on) and then releasing it to the 2nd turn, instead of opening it to no tension and then turning it to add some. LOL (In other words, my tension is higher than average.) It does explain how I have consistently managed to drop jean size and have kick a$$ legs and a decent butt though. ;)It also explains why I can do the StairMaster like nobody's business. Well, everything else is easy now, so I am not going to change my tension to an easier one. I just thought I would admit my DORK status for all of my spark buds to see.

Spin on!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BLUETIGGER33 1/23/2010 3:28PM

    Even if you've been doing it the "wrong" way it has obviously helped you tremendously. Good for you for keeping it set to the "wrong" tension level.

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DAWNWS1 1/21/2010 2:34PM

    Wellll, that sounds like something I would do, so I'll admit to being a dork right along with you!!!!! Never been on a spin bike, wouldn't have any idea what to do with it (other than pedal), so yea, definitely something I would do...

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MOTHERBEAR4 1/15/2010 11:58PM

    Oh That's a hoot! Even if you did it wrong - and the tension was hard - ya didn't quit or slow down.

My teenager likes to call me a dork - sometimes. emoticon

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JENNIFER0807 1/15/2010 11:43AM

    i dont know much about spinning but how great is that! You pushed yourself harder without realizing it! Glad ur seeing results. emoticon

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GETTO10 1/14/2010 2:52PM


That is great!! Maybe I should try this also. hahaha. I love spin class. It is really work though even if you try to slack you still get some benefits.

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I Love My Sister But...

Monday, January 11, 2010

So, I met up with some friends this weekend. One of them (Amy) was back from her law school studies in Indiana and I agreed to join her to a trip to see UCLA law school, a possible transfer location for her. She is uber smart. I am also not opposed because that brings one of my best friends back to me. Currently she is my IM/phone/email buddy who returns to shop with me because when she comes back every couple of months it is apparent I need new clothes in a new size LOL. Amy is very patient. Then on Sunday I saw my girls from grad school, Shabnam and Kim, mixed with some Weight Watchers tortilla soup, The Proposal on DVD, some Wii action (296 on the hula hoop, TY) and of course girl talk since one of us prego. All in all a good weekend. Except...

Amy rents/shares her house since she is away so much to my sister and her family. (Big house, and it worked out well since the economy crapped out.) So when I see Amy, I also see my sister. It is all good. I like my sister. She is funny and talented, and as many sisters are, can get on my freakin nerves. She has been a big supporter of my "get healthy" motives. She herself did an excellent job of losing her baby weight that stayed on a little too long, but that really was the only time she had a weight issue. I think I have said before, she is about 5'8, so even as my little sister, she is my 4 inch taller sister. :) Tall, thin, long legs, nice olive toned get the picture. In contrast, I have always been the short, chubby or fat, pale, fair-skinned big sister.

I appreciate her nice comments. None of them are backhanded or a slight against me. But this weekend, it became apparent that she thinks I should be done. Huh? I have only just reached the "overweight" mark on the bmi chart. I am a long way from being done on the weight aspect of my journey. I tried to explain that I have this (touching various parts of my body) that still needs to go away, etc. She proclaimed she has that too and that is just our build. But that is just it! We are not built alike! We contrast in almost every way with the exception of our big blue eyes and other minor things. The only thing we have every worn the same is our shoe size. (Yes, I have giant feet for a littler person LOL) I just do not understand it. I know that I cannot necessarily see every change in myself in the mirror. But how can she think I am already small enough? I aim for healthy, and this is not healthy yet. It is healthier than where I was; I will admit that. But don't try to stop me now.

I also had not realized it, but the next size down for me is one she is not wearing. She is a 7/8 at the moment. (She has gained about 10 pounds in the last 6 mos.) I am on my way to a 6, and plan on going even further. I will be physically smaller than her for the first time in my life in every way...with the exception of the bra cup size, which still ticks her off. (Sorry, I think that is funny.) Hmmm...She has held the title of the thin, pretty one for a long time. I know she will always be that. She is my sis. It is an absurd thought, but is it possible for her to be threatened or jealous of me? I know that all of the changes are an adjustment for me, but I had never thought that there would be an adjustment for her. Maybe it is my own naivety. I did not have to adjust when she lost weight; I was still the fat sister.

I suppose time is the only thing that allows for adjustments. And it is not as though she sabotages me or anything. She is still a big supporter of mine. It just makes me less comfortable to share certain things, you know. And that is unfortunate, since I don't have hardly any family as it is, and it is always nice to have a support crew.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

UFCCHICK 5/15/2010 3:11AM

    I'm sorry your sister acts that way towards you. I'm thankful to have a lot of support around me. My sister is 10 years older than me but she used to be very tiny due to ulcerative colitis when she was 16 had her entire colon removed. After having her 1st child she kept the weight on pretty much loss some then had baby #2 and after him had weight too. She lost it but then gained some back. I was supportive to her and she is very supportive to me I'm thankful. My mom I would have to say is my biggest supporter even more so than my husband. It's just a slight difference lol She knows I can do it now I'm starting to believe that myself

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KELPROC 1/12/2010 12:25PM

    I have two sisters, one is 5 years older, one is 5 years younger. We take turns being the "fat" one... and to tell you the truth, I am starting to weigh less than both of them, and I hate the feeling that one of them is going to take their turn as the "fat" one. I'd rather be the fat one and have those feelings on myself, than to have them take their turn. It's a horrible feeling, and we all look so much alike, other than height, which I got screwed on... that it's easy to tell which one of us is packig on the pounds. I have had these same discussions with them, not about being done... but about them being irritated with my obsession of my weight. So, I have to choose to ignore them. It's also really easy to get sabotaged (indirectly) when we go to lunch or have a party because they are not watching their weight, it leaves me less options without being obvious that what they're eating is not healthy for them or me. I say that as long as you are trying to be healthy and not 'skinny' that you are headed in the right direction, and it's possible for someone who has known you for your entire life (never at this size before) to look at you and say... wow... that seems drastic, I think you should stop. She has known you your entire life, and has neve seen you as a '6', that might take some adjusting for her. You should invite her to spark with you, maybe she'll realize that you are taking a healthy approach to it! :)

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JENNIFER0807 1/12/2010 10:03AM

    It is very possible that she is jealous and at the same time not be aware of it herself or imagine that you are picking up on this. Sibling rivalry is not a new concept. Most likey it is not with malicious intent that she is saying these things so just shrug it off and like NRLB75 says give her some more time to adjust to the new person you are becoming. Even though you didnt have to "adjust" we are all different and react differently. It seems you are a good person and are trying to avoid an uncomfortable situation without hurting your relationship with your sister but i think in this case you might have to be deaf to her remarks and keep the peace and be the bigger person even though it will irk the heck out of you ...but whatever..its only her opinion and hey...she'll get used to it! emoticon

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NRLB75 1/12/2010 9:41AM

    I'm sure I don't know enough about your sister to comment on her jealousy, but I do think you're right that your transformation will be an adjustment for her (& probably all of your other friends/family too). Certainly your self image & confidence have improved, so you are not the same person anymore. It's like different flavors of vanilla ice cream, they're all vanilla but homestyle and vanilla bean are not same, both good but different. Your sis just might need some extra time to adjust to your new flavor!

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My Boyfriend's Crush on Rachel Ray and How That Plays Into My Diet

Friday, January 08, 2010

Yep you read that right. My boyfriend has this unusual crush on Rachel Ray. It doesn't really match his other crush list. I think it has to do with the fact that she makes food and he envisions her serving it to him. LOL The boy does like food...and growing up in a rather traditional hispanic home where his mom served the boys, he thoroughly enjoys the whole women cater to men thing. Too bad, so sad, but he picked me. LMAO I can cook and bake, but I am not a fan of serving. I cooked so get off you butt and serve me! Or at the very least, serve yourself.

Anyhow, he was watching her and she was talking about Shirataki Noodles. (I was not home. I was at the library researching my little nonprofit business thing I am thinking about.) Has anyone tried them? Supposedly you can replace them with any noodle you use. They are tofu and have 20 cals. a serving. Hungry Girl uses them in recipes for Alfredo and such as recall. He was so excited when I got home about it that I did a search. I found this link that compares noodles:
Then I wondered why so much better (other than calorie content). There is a whole site dedicated to them, and this page tells what specifically is in them that helps lose weight.

He is just super excited about this whole thing. And since I am not a buzz killer, I will give it a go. So this weekend, I will be purchasing some to try them out next week, replacing the noodles to use in regular pasta dishes and such. Let the great Shirataki experiment begin!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ROCKIN_LIFE 1/12/2010 2:22PM

    I've had those noodles a few times, but they are too nasty! I keep thinking I'll try them again since they have such low stats, but then I remember the texture (rubber), smell (fishy), and taste (combination of rubbery fish and tire tread). I hope you have better luck than I did!


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PINKAMINGO 1/11/2010 11:00PM

    I love Rachael Ray. She seems really genuine and has a lot a great recipe ideas. I'm surprised she talked about the shirataki noodles since she has always been moderation instead of low fat. Read the Hungry Girl directions as you have to really drain the noodles well or they are slimy. Another substitute are noodles you can get at a health food store. I know this isn't helpful because I can't remember the name of them. My local health food store discontinued Shirataki and had these. Closer to a real noodle as opposed to tofu. And they are high in fiber.

And in this day and age, your BF should learn to cook and serve you! That would be awesome. Guys that cook are sexy.

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DAWN788 1/11/2010 9:28PM

    oh boyy don't worry there's nothing wrong with your bf - i know a TON of guys with cruses on rachel ray. at least she's not some stick figure, right? lol

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OFORTUNA 1/9/2010 11:43AM

    I have used them before. I'm not a great cook, so maybe I just didn't use them right, but they were a little bit slimy for me. The consistency were good, and they held up well in sauce, but they probably needed to be drained better or cooked longer or something. They're relatively tasteless, so that wasn't an issue.

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HPYGRL09 1/8/2010 9:09PM

    I read Hungry girl all the time and she talks about these in a lot of recipes. I haven't tried them yet. Please post about how they taste and how you used them (red sauce, alfredo etc..)Hey, and if you haven't already check out the website, lots of great recipes and food substitutions.

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DAWNWS1 1/8/2010 9:06PM

    Let me know how you do with them. I haven't been able to find them yet at my grocery stores, thinking I'll have to go to a health food store or Whole Foods.

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