LINDY2013   5,191
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LINDY2013's Recent Blog Entries

October Already????

Monday, October 07, 2013

Yikes. I have not been on Spark for 176 days. When I am not on Spark, I am not only not successful, I actually go BACKWARDS. I have not stepped on scale yet today, but I know that I have gained weight. Even as I write, I know I am struggling with staying on track. I am struggling with eating right. I am struggling with staying focused. So today, I will work on drinking all of my water. I will also start with prayer.
I know that I was struggling to stay on Spark even before I went to Maui to help a childhood friend move there and spend some time with her. A couple days after I returned, I fell off of my horse, hurting my ribs. That was in July. I could barely move for a couple weeks. My ribs still hurt when I move in a particular position. This doesn't give me the right to start eating again, I am just writing about what I know right this moment. I am on Spark, but haven't FELT the Spark. Last time I FELT the Spark, was in March....just before my granddaughter died days before she was to be born.
So...I start again. I know and have realized that I do not like to feel PAIN, especially emotional pain. Physical pain did not make me want to eat, it just made me not want to move. But emotional pain is different. It HURTS in a different way, and I cannot control the pain, except to numb it. Which unfortunately, has meant eating for me.
Today, I will pray. I will pray each and every time I want to eat when I am really not hungry.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BJUMPINGFORJOY 10/7/2013 8:54PM

    Sometimes it takes pain for us to know we are a live and that we have to do this for our loved ones even if they have gone on before us. They are watching us. I know that you will get back on track.

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LINDAM.1 10/7/2013 6:23PM

  Water to begin with. salad before meal. Move if it is sitting up in bead before standing , before walking, before running.

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Habit Forming Charts

Monday, April 15, 2013

I guess I need something posted where I can see it....like those habit forming charts I downloaded yesterday from this site for the four things I want to work on for at least 21 days. I walked yesterday and today, so I get to put 2 red marks on my chart, and I created 3 other charts for the water, tracking, and sugar, though I have not started the sugar one yet. I wonder if I just bit off too many things at once?
I shall see.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUGARSMOM2 4/15/2013 6:38PM

  yes you are doing a good job . proceed with care . you can do it . good job . charts are the way to go . emoticon

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MJ7DM33 4/15/2013 4:37PM

  Just take it one day at a time!

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KACEYSW 4/15/2013 3:34PM

    Those charts sound like excellent tools I could use to help myself, as well. Where did you find them?

Be kind to yourself...you are worth it!

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Walk/Jog/walk with my Brittany named Bailey

Sunday, April 14, 2013

He loved it, and so did I! I got on here and after watching my SparkCoach, decided to re watch some of the old videos to get myself back on track! Thanks, Coach Jen, for giving me some pointers for getting back on track! I am back to tracking my food, NO MATTER WHAT I EAT....I will use it as a tool to learn from...something that makes me go....hmmmmmm!!!!! How interesting!
I also learned today that 6 tsp of sugar is all women should have each day! And 6 tsp is equivalent to 24 grams!
I am going to become a super sleuth this week....checking out my foods for sugar!
I KNOW I am addicted!
So...goal for this week....TRACK, drink my water, WALK/JOG my dog every day, and check out the sugar grams in the food I eat! I even downloaded the habit forming chart that Spark has in its FIRE system, and I am going to check to see how often I can stay true to these goals!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MJ7DM33 4/15/2013 3:34PM

  emoticon emoticon

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KLAD_COCKERS 4/14/2013 4:06PM

    Good for you! That's a great way to start your week!

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Recovering from Tragedy

Thursday, March 28, 2013

My month has certainly been roller coaster. On March 1, I bought an APHA Palomino named Trigger, my first horse to buy since I was 19. However, on March 10, my darling daughter lost her baby girl who was due to be born at the end of this month. We were all devastated. It has certainly been an emotional month. So many highs, so many lows.
Today is my birthday, and one of my friends lost her mother to cancer earlier this morning.
I lost 5 pounds this month, only to have gained three of them back. It is time to get back to SparkPeople on a regular basis, and stay focused once again. That is not easy.
But I am on today. I can only say what I am going to do today...this minute, this hour...
I will try to stay in the moment.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LINDY2013 4/14/2013 3:56PM

    Thanks for all of you who posted encouragement after this blog. I appreciate it very much.


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RAKASHA 4/9/2013 11:18PM

    I'm sorry for your loss.

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SOPHIEMAE2007 4/7/2013 9:55AM

    When it rains, it pours. Sorry for you losses.

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CHERIRIDDELL 3/29/2013 10:02PM

    So sorry for our losses.

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LIVELYGIRL2 3/29/2013 7:58PM

  Lindy,
This is heartbreaking. I know from experience first child was stillborn. This was in the 1980's. At that time, people wouldn't acknowledge it and allow you to freely discuss it.

Another child someday won't replace that one, but it will meaningful and and precious when the time is right.

And you will be there to assure your daughter and son in law, it has nothing o do with them.

|My next pregnancy I had gestational diabetes , but he was safe and happy.

Spark People here are wonderful. I believe it is a great community and positive resource. emoticon

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ADEWYN 3/29/2013 7:25PM

    we will do this together!.... let me know if i can help in anyway.. even if it just a hug :)
Have a better month week day moment....

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_LINDA 3/28/2013 5:52PM

    Oh how terrible :((( So very sorry for your losses :( Not a birthday to remember :(( Condolences to your daughter, can't imagine losing a new life before it even has begun :( Cancer has taken so many lives prematurely :(
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SMILES_CAN_DO 3/28/2013 5:13PM

  Oh, that's a lot to handle. So, so sad, your poor daughter and grandchild, and you, grandma. So many people to be there for and then to have to take care of yourself too. So sorry to hear this. Hopefully the time with your new horse will bring you some peace and thoughtfulness that you'll no doubt need. You and your family is in my thoughts! Take care.

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STEVEN_D 3/28/2013 4:13PM

    That's the hardest thing for me is to be in the moment. The worry, the greif, the whys in life can take me very far away from the present. Be there for yourself, daughter and friend.

And stay with Sparkepeople, everytime I leave I gain weight!! Best wishes

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Staying focused

Saturday, March 02, 2013

Staying focused is NOT easy when life gets very busy! I just experienced it! I subbed for a teacher friend of mine who teaches in an area that I have always felt a bit intimidated...music. He ends up teaching every student in the building in a two day period, and also teams up once a week with ANOTHER teacher who teaches in another area that I feel a bit intimidated...PE! I am retired after teaching 32 years in a 4th, 5th, or 6th grade classroom...or a combination of 4/5 or 5/6...but never all day in Music or PE! I was always thankful for the fact that our school district had two excellent specialists to teach full time in our building.
So to say I was out of my comfort zone when I subbed in my friend's Music class for 3 weeks...I guess you could say...MOST DEFINITELY! Though I totally enjoyed it, I also had to spend extra time preparing so I felt confident in front of students.
Busy was hardly the word, and exhausted at the end of the day was a given, ESPECIALLY on the Friday when we taught the entire school Physical Harmony...with the PE teacher. EVERY class period was full of physical activity, that we modeled. The bouncing and hopping was the hardest for me, and at the end of that day I felt crippled!
You would think that if I stayed THAT busy, I should lose weight, yes? NO. I actually gained 2 pounds! The only thing I could think of was that I was not focused. I was not focused daily on making sure I got in all of my water. I was not focused at the end of the day to make sure I tracked all my food...especially the stuff I ate at the end of the day! I think being dehydrated and tired caused me to eat more....because I did not stay focused on the fact that I was probably tired and dehydrated!
I know I did not drink enough water because as the music teacher, I started getting classes every 45 minutes from the beginning of the morning until noon. Then a half hour later, I was getting students again until close to the end of the day, when I finally got a preparation period to get ready for the next day. There was really NO time to go to the bathroom until noon! And drinking water while teaching might have been a great idea....but holding it when you had to go didn't seem so enticing. As a regular teacher before I retired, I could slip out and ask another teacher to watch my class if I really had to go, but as a Music Teacher, you only have 45 minutes to work with each class...all eyes are on YOU during that time...no slipping out. Come to think of it...as a regular teacher before I retired....I didn't drink enough water either! My poor kidneys!
Now that my short term sub job is over, I need to get my focus back where it was the beginning of February. I was on a roll then....losing weight every week! I want that again...So STAYING FOCUSED is my mantra this next week.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SMILES_CAN_DO 3/2/2013 7:12PM

  First of all, you do not look old enough to be retired after teaching 32 years! And your blog makes me realize how talented you are! You are awesome! Congratulations for tackling music and phy ed with the gusto you did! I can relate to so much of what you went through. I work in an office with just two people. Our office is located in a building where the restroom is down the hall and I need to lock the door when I step out. There are times when it's very hard to leave. I've also come to realize that being tired is my number one reason for not being able to stay on track. My second is I immediately want to turn to food the minute I get upset. The "I don't care" voice speaks very loud. I've learned to recognize what's happening, now the hard part is to learn how to deal with it, which I'm sure is what you're going to do too. You have a good handle on what's going on! You're doing well!

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ALICIA214 3/2/2013 11:16AM

 

They say that muscle weighs more than fat with all that PE you have probably toned up yours ... emoticon

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WISHFULDREAMING 3/2/2013 11:05AM

    Staying focused is a challenge for me also. Especially when life gets busy. That's good that you identified where the issue was and it will help in trying to find a solution if you are in that situation again.

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