What I Have Learned While On My "Sabbatical"

Monday, May 21, 2012

I am back. I plan to be spending a lot less time on SP, but I NEED to be here every day!

As some of you know, I took a leave from SP to spend more time with my DH and to try to make my days a little less stressful. DH has had a fistula put in his arm to prepare him for eventual dialysis. He has been holding his own and giving the fistula some time to get ready for use, thank God. However, he has suffered from some other complications. He was hospitalized for close to a week with congestive heart failure and while there they discovered he was severely anemic. So, more Specialists, more pills and more restrictions. He tries to remain optimistic because that is who he is. I am the Stress Queen!

My weight has fluctuated up and down but tends to level out around the 175 mark. In other words, I have not lost any weight since I have been away. The good news is I have not gained any that stayed with me for long! I know the only way I am going to get this remaining poundage off me is to go back to my tried and true routines again. My exercise has been erratic and I even started smoking again.

So, I turned the big 60 in April and quit smoking (again!) on May 1st! I have started to get myself back to the gym on a more regular basis and my goal is to go at least 4 times per week. Since DH has very restricted exercise options, we plan to walk more and do some swimming together. My nutrition has been erratic too. I cook great for DH on his restricted diet, but it is so bland that I have been sneaking in some extras. A lot of the foods that are healthy for me are actually not good for him at all. He can't have any dairy, broccoli, spinach, brown rice, whole grains, bananas, oranges and most other things we think of as healthy. I know...no excuses!!!

Back to the title of this blog, "What I Have Learned While On My Sabbatical":

1. I need to keep my routines, no matter what.
2. I need to stop making excuses for making bad choices.
3. I need to take time for my needs if I expect to be able to help my DH.
4. I need to keep in touch with my SP friends. The support here makes all the difference!

A little extra information for my friends: I finally went and had my long overdue full body scans and I remain cancer free!!!!

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Goodbye For Now & One Year SparkVersary!

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Dear Spark Family,

It has been an amazing year thanks to this wonderful website and the equally wonderful friends I have made during my time here. This is the most success I have ever had at losing weight and keeping it off. Not to mention, developing a fitness schedule which works well for me. I feel that I have built a firm foundation to move forward with for the rest of my healthier life. Although I have not reached my weight loss goal yet, I am sure I will this year. I have gone from 240 pounds to 175 pounds and am feeling better about myself and healthier than I have in many years. Having said that, it is with some sadness that I need to say I must move on.

I will miss all of you and will try to stop by once in a while to say "hi" and see how you are doing. You are all wonderful people and I couldn't have done any of this without your support and caring. Now, I will step out on my own and see if I have the strength of purpose to continue forward or not. I know if I don't have the strength, I would be welcomed back with open arms by the most supportive group of people I have ever had the pleasure of knowing!

The time has come for me to spend less time on my computer and more time living in the "real" world. With my DH's recent medical issues, time has become a problem for me in trying to accomplish all I need (and want) to do on a daily basis. There have been occasions where I have used the excuse of, "I don't have time to go to the gym today. I am behind on SP and need to catch up." Or, "I can't sit and watch TV with you right now (to DH). I have to post in SP." I cannot let my "virtual" world overrule my "real" world and until I can find more time or more balance, I have to sacrifice SP.

I will continue to use the nutrition tracker, because I KNOW I will fall by the wayside if I don't! I know I will have to measure my food and count calories for the rest of my life and I don't mind. I have developed good, sound habits here and they are second nature by now. The same for my gym schedule. This is my way of life now.


P.S. If you need to get in touch with me directly, send me sparkmail and I will respond as soon as possible.

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Life Is Like A Box Of Chocolates...

Tuesday, January 31, 2012

That line from the movie Forrest Gump keeps running through my head lately. The rest of the quote goes, "You never know what you're going to get."

The problem for me is how I REACT to what I get! Oh sure, I can be the life of the party when things are going right. No problem. But, when things get a little dicey, the Stress Queen boots the Party Queen out the door!

Looking back on my life, I think I see why I have always had problems with my weight. I am definitely an emotional eater. I love food under normal situations and I love to cook. But, during the bad times in life, I want to eat everything in sight. No matter if it is something I really like or n0t. Just anything.

Those of you who know a little about me, know I have been dealing with my DH's decreasing kidney function for the last few months. I have spent most of this last week stressing about his appointment with the specialist yesterday. To the point where I think I actually made myself sick. And, didn't feel like going to the gym. And, did not eat as well as I should. The good news is that I did NOT go overboard and start binging on everything in sight! That is progress and I will take it!!!

As I suspected, DH's kidney function continues to decrease and is now at 21%. We have an appointment with a vascular surgeon next week to schedule his surgery to create a fistula in his arm for his eventual dialysis. The doctor said it takes 3 to 4 months to heal and they want to get it ready now. We have been advised to have him do the in clinic hemodialysis instead of the home peritoneal dialysis we had originally planned for. In many ways, this is a relief to me. He has a lot of other medical issues including diabetes and is on a bunch of medications for blood pressure and heart problems also. I think we are both feeling more comfortable with the idea of having medical professionals with him during his dialysis.

We went to the gym together today and had a great workout! It felt so good to be doing something normal together. We will get through this time together as we have gotten through everything else life has given us over the past 32 years. Life is like a box of chocolates....

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2 Year Anniversary - Cancer Free!

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Two years ago today, I had major surgery for a rare form of uterine cancer called MMMT. Today, I celebrated my DH's birthday (2 days early) by surprising him with matinee tickets to see the Emmy & Tony Award winning show "Blast" at the Cobb Energy Performing Arts Center!

Despite the torrential downpour and tornado warnings as we traveled to the venue, we enjoyed an outstanding and entertaining performance by multi-talented young people. If this show ever comes to your area, I highly recommend it!

The weather cleared for our drive home, so we stopped for a pizza and a beer at Mellow Mushroom, one of our local favorite restaurants. Just got home and relaxing for the rest of the evening together. What a wonderful day!!!

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Well Linda, That's What You Get For Showing Off!!!

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

I went to the gym yesterday and did 20 minutes on the elliptical and a full lower body strength training.

After that, I returned home and started watching that new TV show The Revolution with DH. To make a long story short, this is a new makeover/fitness/weight loss show hosted by Ty Pennington of Extreme Home Makeover fame! I thought that was an interesting choice for a host.

Anyway, they have this personal trainer to the stars guy who was showing some exercises to do at home. The first was simple enough, so of course I jumped right up to do it. Just take a regular kitchen chair sit down and get up. Then repeat. For 30 times. For 3 sets. OK, I did it, but it was harder than I thought it would be.

A little later in the show, same personal trainer guy shows some exercises for 2 people to do together. So, of course, I say to DH, "Stand up and do this with me. I can do that!" Reluctantly, DH stood up while I laid on the floor. He then stood behind my head (following trainer guy's instruction), while I raised both legs up so he could grab my ankles (lifting my butt off the floor) and swing my legs forward and back!

Fast forward to today...I can barely move! DUH!!! My quads are like rocks from doing the up/down chair thingy and my lower back is less than pliable after doing the leg insanity! To make matters worse, my BLC 18 team is doing a last chance workout today and we are supposed to be hitting the cardio hard! Translate that to walking in place for me at 10 minute intervals to try to get something in to add to the team's count.

Lesson Learned!!!

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