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Day 7

Sunday, October 07, 2012

What a beautiful (but chilly) fall day in Wisconsin. Considering I've spent the last three hours reading, I actually got a lot done.

I got a batch of oatmeal raisin cookies made, the laundry done and I got bonus points for putting it away! I also made a fabulous Sunday dinner of home-grown spaghetti squash topped with canned pasta sauce from this summer's tomatoes. It was delish, if I say so.

Most weekends, I like to get a long run in. I had signed-up for a 5K held in a small town south of where I live. It's a fund-raiser for the local ambulance and the route is along the Wisconsin River. It was so cold yesterday and very windy and I was actually contemplating not doing the run. I had done 4 miles on the treadmill and was going to call it a day on running. But, I felt like I was letting myself down if I didn't at least attempt this 5K. So, I went. When I got there, I picked up my 'goodie bag' with my t-shirt. OK, I got the t-shirt, lets just go and be down. But, I stuck it out. I'm so glad that I did. I had a fantastic run. I pushed myself and went at a faster pace than I normally do. I actually placed in my age group! I was second with a time of 28:10 (and yes, I checked, there were 10 of us in my age group) I was so proud of myself. I set out and accomplished a challenge that was unexpected. What a wonderful feeling.

Here's my closing thoughts for this blog entry. Have a wonderful Sunday and truly find the good in everyday! It is there, we just need to look.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MUSHCAT 10/7/2012 7:45PM

    I love your attitude! emoticon on taking 2nd in your age group and achieving a personal best. emoticon

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Saturday, October 06, 2012

Day 6 of my 30 day blog challenge. Here's today's question:
What has been most challenging about maintaining a weight loss (now or in the past)?

Iíve encountered a few challenges while losing weight and maintaining the weight loss. I have to be consistent. The mind set of once the weight is off, the hard part is over, is so wrong. Losing weight is easy. After numerous times losing, I can certainly attest that I have that part of the equation down pat. I get that part. The hard part has been maintaining. It truly is a lifestyle of eating and exercising.

Iím a different person now than when I was 76+ pounds ago. Which leads me to one of my unexpected challenges: friends. Or should I say, people who I thought were my friends. Before I lost the weight, I had two girlfriends who I would do things with on the weekends. They too, are overweight, and like I was at the time, always looking for an easier way to lose weight. Who wants to take the time to fix and eat healthy foods? Who wants to sweat (a lot sometimes) while exercising? There has to be some magic pill, right? Wrong? Once I realized that, the division in our friendship really started to grow. Iíve learned to stand up for myself, my body and my self-esteem. I actually had them question my eating and when was I going to stop this healthy eating, enough is enough. They also questioned, why was I running? Didnít I have arthritis? How can I run with arthritis? I must be lying about that? Iíve learned to be a little bit selfish on this weight loss journey. If a person is being toxic, I will not allow them to take me down with them. It was a painful decision but, Iíve learned that I need positive, nurturing and supportive friends and family in my life. Do the same for me and I will return the love and support ten-fold.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NIKKIV2 10/8/2012 9:48AM

    It is hard when the people you thought to be good friends seem to want you to fail. You are so right about having to be somewhat selfish on this journey to succeed. Good for you and keep doing what works for you!

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Friday, October 05, 2012

Today is Day number 5 of the 30 day blog challenge.

These are today's questions....

What is your weight history like? How old where you when you first 'went on a diet'? Have you lost and regained? How is this time different from others?

My weight history spans a few decades. I honestly canít remember when I first started dieting. Maybe junior high. I knew that I didnít have Ďtheí look that all the Ďpopularí girls had. My thought process, even at that 13, was that if I lost weight, I too could be Ďpopularí. Thus, started my unhealthy relationship with food. If youíre old enough you certainly remember the otc diet drug dexatrim? Did you know in the 70ís if you were 13 years old, you could buy it. No questions asked. For those of you too young to remember, it was a legal mild form of speed. No wonder a person lost weight! If you took those and followed their diet plan, you were like the little Energizer bunny. You just kept going. You burned calories and you lost weight, along with muscle and a certain amount of sleep. The sad part, as soon as you stopped, the weight came back. Well, if the weight came back, it certainly wasnít the fact that I wasnít exercising (properly) or fueling my body correctly. Nope, it was my fault, I was weak, I had no control over my eating. Thus, I would severely cut my calories. I remember in college cutting my calories to no more than 800 a day and I would exercise for no less than an hour a day (7 days a week). I lost weight. A lot of weight but, again, I couldnít maintain that loss. I couldnít maintain that lifestyle. It wasnít healthy and I knew it. I tried the more mainstream diets such as WW and Nutri-System. They worked until, I stopped the Ďdietí.

It wasnít until I realized that I didnít need another Ďdietí I needed a new lifestyle. A diet is something, that in my mind, has a beginning and an ending. As soon as the diet is done, the weight is going to be coming right back. A lifestyle is just that, a for life way of eating and exercising. It hasnít been easy. Iíve had to learn a whole new way of thinking about food. There is no Ďbadí or Ďgoodí food. Some people can be like that; I canít. When I start restricting a certain food because itís Ďbadí, I instantly want it. Iím trying to really balance my eating to be able to allow myself the occasional treat while still eating plenty of fruits, veggies and whole grains. Iíve increased my exercise level and do it in a moderate way. I allow myself two rest days from exercising to allow my body the necessary time to heal from the impact of running and biking.

Iím slowly learning that I can have my cake and eat it too. Just not as big of a slice.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NUTRON3 10/6/2012 6:18AM

    Good blog

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Fears and Demons

Thursday, October 04, 2012

Today's question for the blog a day is about fears

What are (or were) your fears about weight loss?

My greatest fear about losing weight was (still is), of course, gaining it back. Again. I had a significant amount to lose and keep off. You know, you start off on this journey with all the determination in the world. But, all the determination in the world wasnít keep the weight off until I got at the root of why I was overeating and sabotaging my health. That lead to the real fear I had about losing weight. In order to keep this weight off permanently, I'm forced to confront those demons from my childhood. The ones that I like to keep buried underneath my fat. I was emotionally abused by my mother, I was bullied at school. I had no safe place. The only time I felt safe and secure was when I was eating. This lead to a lifetime of emotional eating. It's been a lifelong lesson in the making but, I'm finally starting to get it.

Itís hard to face these fears and demons. I donít believe they never go away but, Iím getting so much better at putting them in their place. With my faith in God, and my loving supportive husband by my side, those demons don't stand a chance.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NUTRON3 10/5/2012 6:17AM

    Love your attitude!

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Wednesday, October 03, 2012

Day 3 of my posting challenge. Today's question is who have I shared my weight loss goals with and what has been good about sharing those goals.

When I initially started the weight loss journey this time, I didnít share my weight loss goals with anyone; not even my husband. In the 18 years that he has known me, I have loss a significant amount of weight no less than 3 times. And like the previous 5+ times before those 3, I would gain the weight back. So this time, I didnít say anything. I didnít want to set myself up for failing by not achieving any specific weight loss goals. So, instead of weight loss goals (remember, Iím more than a number on a scale) I set out with different goals in mind; eating healthier and exercising more. If the weight came off as a result of those goals, so be it. If nothing else, I would be healthier and be in better shape. I shared these goals with my husband and supportive friends. One of my eating goals was to eat healthier so I set small but, attainable goals. Increase my water intake, reduce my consumption of diet soda intake to twice a week, increase my fruit/vegetable consumption to 6-7x/day, eat less processed food. These little goals and many more, by themselves, didnít really mean a lot. Itís what happened when I started doing them all together, thatís when the magic started to happen. I started to lose weight. One of my exercise goals was to be consistent. I had to find something I liked and could do year-round; so I started walking. I walked all over the place. I walked so much that I completed a walking event of 13 miles. After I did those 13 miles walking, something Ďclickedí in my mind. If I could walk a half-marathon, certainly I could run a half-marathon. So the goal of being able to run was one that I shared with a co-worker. Sheís a runner and I knew that I could trust her to help me along. With her guidance I started setting small goals of being able to run a complete mile without stopping. From that first mile, I worked up to 3 miles. Without her help and encouragement, I feel that my goal of running a half-marathon would have been harder to obtain.

By sharing my goals with positive and nurturing friends and family, I have found the support and encouragement that made achieving them possible. I probably would have achieved these goals with out their support but, it would have been harder and not nearly as much fun.

Before I close I wanted to post this link. It's a very powerful message and one that a lot of us could possibly relate to you. When I was a child, there was no awareness of bullying. I was bullied so much that I truly believe that it did affect my self-worth. I'm working on that but, 40 years later, it's still an issue. I hope that some day everyone will be seen for whom they truly are - a mirror image of our Heavenly Father.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WONDERWOMAN 10/3/2012 9:35AM

    This is a really cool blog. It shows how far you have come in your understanding and acceptance of yourself. Keep at it; there's only more good to come.

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