LEXIBELLE715   5,962
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Back and ready to get going again...

Sunday, April 26, 2009

So, I survived the cold that knocked me on my rump last week, though I do have my battle scars to deal with. Thanks to the cold I've got a deep, hacking cough that's still lingering, along with some head congestion. Under different circumstances I might choose to wait until the cough became more of an occasional inconvenience instead of an every-hour occurence, however I don't have that kind of time. Why, you might ask? Well, because for me these coughs tend to linger a very long time. Thanks to battles with asthma and allergies that span back to my early years, anytime I catch a cold, I also catch a cough that will last anywhere from a few weeks to several months. So far my record was a cough that stuck around for over a year, but there was nothing the doctors could do.

That said, I'm not willing to wait that long to re-start my fitness program. This past week has been extremely inactive and I can feel the effects it's having on my body, on top of those of the cold. I know that I'm going to have to go back into it slowly, allowing myself to work at a lower intensity than normal but as long as I'm doing it I'll be happy.

I think for this week, I'm going to attempt to go back to basics. The temperature here in Florida is starting to climb, but I want to fight through it and do at least 10 minutes of walking each day. If I'm physically able to do more while still benefiting from it (basically, not feeling like I'm going to pass out...) I will. On top of that I'll also supplement with indoor workouts that are a little lower intensity than my Belly Dancing or Strip Tease videos. I'll probably fall back to my favorite Spark Cardio Kickboxing video and find a few others online that will fit the bill. My goal this week is to slowly increase the intensity as I feel my lungs can take it.

I'm also going to be sure to do my strength training. I've gone ahead and put together a Lower-Body standing workout and a Core Workout through my fitness manager. If I'm able to, I may throw in some ball work but that's contingent upon being able to find my exercise balls in the garage. I know they're there, just not sure which box. Thankfully the garage got reorganized this weekend, so it should be easier for me to find them.

Nutrition this week and next is going to be a huge challenge, unlike normal. Our food budget for the next 14 days is extremely small, so I'm going to have to get creative. I know I need to find a way to budget in some 'snack' vegetables and fruits because I was going NUTS this week not having something to go to. My goal is to keep things as healthy and 'whole food' as possible.

I think as long as I'm able to keep my meals from getting too carb heavy (i.e. resorting to eating too many pasta-based meals) I'll be okay. I've become the master at bargain shopping since becoming unemployed, I'll just consider this a challenge to keep my skills sharp.

Really, it would be nice if I could push some of the due dates on some of these bills to the middle of the month instead of at the end. I think this week I have to pay a total of 7 or 8 bills, including necessities like rent and electric. In this case I can't really push any of them off either, which sucks. I've got to sit down with Excel and see if there's a better way to handle them...

One last thing before I close this extremely disjointed entry. I would like to ask everyone to send as many good thoughts and luck our way as possible. Ray interviewed for a job about two weeks ago. Last week he went in for a second interview, background check and drug test, which to me is a good sign as companies generally won't do a drug test on people they don't plan on hiring. Right now we're sitting in limbo, PRAYING that the phone will ring with a job offer. So if any of you out there could find it in your hearts to send some 'phone ring' and 'job offer' thoughts our way that would be spectacular. If we can at least get Ray working again it will be a HUGE help.

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.DUSTY. 4/27/2009 9:20AM

    Good thoughts coming your way! emoticon

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Monday, April 20, 2009

Somewhere along the way I picked up a nasty cold bug last week. Not sure if it was at Aquatica (water park) or while we were at DSC (college), but I'd really love to return it, thank you. It all started innocuously as a tickle in my throat and a cough. I should've known, but didn't think anything of it. Yesterday morning I woke up and wanted nothing more than to go back to bed. Sore throat, hacking cough, minor congestion. I'm fairly sure that I'm running or was running a temperature. Last night was a combination of freezing and sweating. The animals loved me because I was warm. Damned opportunists.

On top of that, Thursday I managed to do something to my back. It wasn't an exercise injury or even a house-cleaning injury. I hurt it getting up off of a couch. Yes, you read that right. A couch. We were at Keiser University waiting for Ray's meeting with the Admissions Counselor. When he came out and we got up to follow him into an office and as I stood I felt something 'pop' or 'pull' in my lower back, and that was it. I was able to accompany Ray through the rest of the meeting and the tour of the campus, but I definitely wasn't comfortable.

Thanks to running errands, my back and then this cold, I think I got a grand total of two days of exercise last week. Definitely a long way from my goal of 5 to 6 days. Unfortunately this week isn't getting off to such a great start either. The way I feel right now I can't even imagine doing much beyond sitting on the couch or laying in bed. Hopefully, this won't linger long and I'll be able to get back into my routine tomorrow or Wednesday.

And to end this on a more positive note (two of them actually):

- I'm only about two steps away from starting school in the fall. Right now I'm waiting for my HS transcripts to make it to the Financial Aid office. Once those are in I'll take care of applying for aid/loans and then go on and register for classes. I'm hoping that all goes well - this is the first thing in a while that I'm this excited about.

- I finally passed the 40lbs lost mark. :) As of this morning I'm down 42.4lbs. Not too shabby, if I do say so myself. Only 11lbs more until I enter two-ville. I've got to say, I can't wait. :)

Okay, my head's starting to spin now - time to go lay back down.

Hope everyone has a wonderful week.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TRACYZABELLE 4/21/2009 4:42AM

    Hey Lexi,

I too have a cold-- day one was a brutal sore thoat but now it is a runny nose and a cough, arghhhhhhhhhhh feel better soon!

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.DUSTY. 4/20/2009 1:56PM

    Hi Lexi! I'm so sorry you're sick and that you also hurt your back! It's time to take care of yourself and not worry about exercising. It'll only add to your stress of being sick. You just have to wait it out and you know as you start feeling better you'll get back to it!
42.4 lbs. lost is so fantastic! emoticon
Take care hon! emoticon

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It's the little things...

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

That make this hard journey worth it. :)

- Finding out I not only did 40 minutes of exercise MORE than required last week, but I beat out most of the other Boot Camp participants. YAY!

- Doing the Spark People Boot Camp Day 1 Kick boxing video at a MUCH higher intensity than ever! I had to pump it up ... it was too easy going at my old pace!

- Knowing I'm light enough for some of the slides at Aquatica again!

and finally, the QUOTE OF THE MONTH (that made all the pain worth it...)

"Whoa, wait, come back here! Cute! You've got a butt now!"
- My darling husband, said as I was walking past him in underwear and a tank top while looking for my MP3 player

Odd as it is to admit, reaching back and feeling the difference was pretty cool. Other than my clothes fitting slightly differently, it was the first REAL difference I've noticed in my body.

Granted, at 300+ pounds still, there's quite a long way to go before I've got a butt (or anything else) that's worth writing home about.

Still, on a journey this long we really need to learn to celebrate and rejoice in the smallest of victories and accomplishments. They're the ones that keep us going. :)

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WAYLAID 4/14/2009 3:47AM

    Girl, I am so with you on that! Without these small victories, it would be impossible to keep going. So yay for having a butt again, and thumbs up to your man for noticing. You must be so proud of yourself, and rightly so...you're kicking some booty! Congrats on doing so well, and don't forget to keep those eyes peeled for more accomplishments, because they're there and sometimes we need to cherish them more than other times. ::High Five!::
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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Changes over time

Saturday, April 11, 2009

So the boot camp I've joined requires participants to take their starting measurements. I was going to skip it, but on a whim I decided to pick up a tape measure. I remembered that back in December I signed up for a website that had me input my measurements to figure out my 'body shape'.

So here's a comparison of my measurements.

Waist: 58.75
Hip: 58
Thigh: 28
Bust: 60
Under Bust: 52

Waist: 53.5 (-5.25)
Hip: 57.5 (-.5)
Thigh: 28 (0)
Bust: 55 (-4)
Underbust: 49.5 (-2.5)

Total inches lost: 12.25

Not too bad if I do say so myself. :) Oh, and another 'milestone' of sorts - I was able to go into WalMart today and actually fit into jeans. It's been over a year since I was able to fit into jeans from any store other than Avenue or Old Navy Online. I was also able to fit into a 26/28 shirt as well, comfortably with some room to 'grow' so to speak. LOL The button down one I tried was still too tight, but even when I was smaller, I always had to go up 1-2 sizes in button down/form fitting shirts because of my stomach.

Maybe one day that *won't* be an issue. :)

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

UNIQUEGIGGLES 4/11/2009 10:50PM


It gives me hope.

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BIZZY240 4/11/2009 4:17PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Keep it up! Did you buy the jeans? That could a good reward!

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TITUS2MOMY 4/11/2009 3:07PM

    Just had to comment- Wow! You rock! Imagine, you lost 12 inches of yourself. Keep it up! I'm very impressed. emoticon

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On perceived 'failures' and restarting....

Sunday, April 05, 2009

Several events this weekend got me thinking about this life-changing journey many of us have chosen to embark upon. Deciding to live a healthy lifestyle that includes fitness and proper eating is a huge decision and a long road pitted with many, many obstacles. Whether it's illness, depression, a birthday, a celebration or simply a day where we want to be pampered, something will always pop up that we have conditioned ourselves to view as a 'temptation' and 'bad' and a 'mistake'. That piece of birthday cake, that slice of pizza, that hamburger or that donut will always be there, presumably lurking and just waiting for us to give in to a moment of weakness.

When that happens of course we're going to have to beat up on ourselves. We're going to get upset and feel like we've 'failed' or 'fallen off the wagon'. Now, granted, indulgences like that should be dealt with in moderation which is sometimes hard when you're trying to avoid them like the plague. Yes, things like french fries and Snickers bars really aren't part of the healthy diet we need to follow to reach our goals. However, here's a question for you...

Where does it get us? That feeling of failure and that certainty that we've fallen off the wagon? What does it accomplish to chastise ourselves for making a mistake?

From my personal experience it gets me one place - further off the path I'm wanting to follow. It may start out with a simple voice in the back of your head saying "well, today's shot - might as well make it my 'free' day for the week", but before you know it things are spiraling out of control. Since today's shot, why not indulge in that banana split I've been craving? And that double cheeseburger with bottomless fries? Well I polished those off yesterday, there's no reason not to indulge in some all-you-can-eat pizza followed by a few marshmallow peeps and chocolate eggs. Then guess what? Yesterday and the day before were horrible, I'm feeling horrible. I'm a big slob that can't stop eating ... I'm going to have a bowl of coco puffs and a jelly donut for breakfast because it obviously doesn't matter.

Then, eventually we crawl out of that sugar, carb and fatty-food coma and a light goes off. Wow, I really went off plan - I need to START OVER! Today's a new day and this is a new week - I will make myself feel so guilty for what I did last week that I'll barely eat and workout like crazy this week to make up for it.

Then guess what? Sure, you have a good week or two or three but eventually you slip up again and guess what? Lather, rinse repeat.

By perpetuating the cycle of being 'good' and then 'falling off the wagon', which is inevitably followed by 'starting over' we're not LEARNING anything.

The whole point of this journey is to make a life long change in ourselves, isn't it? It's to learn to break old habits that got us to where we are and develop new ones that will allow us to live healthier, longer lives. If that's the case, why do we allow ourselves to continue repeating this damaging cycle of success, failure and restarting over and over again. Wouldn't it make more sense to take those moments of weakness and instead of looking at them as failures and beating ourselves up over them, look for the positives and look for a way to learn from it?

Let's take that birthday cake you ate at the office - whether it be one or three slices (two of them in secret, hiding behind your desk). First, prior to the start of your journey would you have stopped at one (or two or three?), or would you have gone back for more? Really, sit and think about it for a minute before you start getting upset. If two months ago you could have easily gone in there and polished off half of what was left then PAT YOURSELF ON THE BACK! You did GOOD! You've managed to limit yourself (somewhat) even when you're totally indulging. That, or maybe it's that it just didn't taste as good as it would have two months ago. Again, be happy! This is a sign that your body and taste in food ARE changing. This is a good step. Now that you've thought about that one, instead of being upset with yourself, why not take that energy and invest it in a way to make sure this doesn't happen again? If your office is anything like mine was, I'm sure you know someone's birthday is coming up at least a day in advance, right? Generally word of any sort of free food is the most popular gossip at least 24hrs prior to the blessed event. This is a good thing! This means you can PLAN! So you know there's going to be an ooey, gooey, chocolate truffle cake for your bosses birthday tomorrow. Well then when you go home that night why not make a plan to pack something sweet that you can reach for INSTEAD of that piece of cake? Bring a bag of frozen grapes or your favorite fruit. Or even indulge a bit and get a chocolaty snack bar if it's the chocolate and not the sweet that you're REALLY going to be craving. Pack that in your lunch and save it for after you all sing happy birthday and partake in the required slice of cake. Then, when you find yourself back in the break room, go for the fridge and your secret snack instead of that piece of cake.

Now you've taken that perceived 'failure' and instead of allowing it to eat at you and lead you further down the path of binging and temptation you've turned it around and made it a beneficial learning experience. Yes, you may gain an extra half of pound from that cake you ate, but it's a lot less than you would've gained if you'd allowed yourself to start down the damaging path of "I messed up..." which ultimately leads to "I'm starting over".

Doesn't it make more sense to make a situation like that a learning experience rather than an excuse to beat up on yourself? Especially when all that negativity does is discourage you more and make it even easier to stray further and further from the path you want to be on.

I don't know, maybe it's different for me. Maybe I don't look at this journey the same way that many others do and I'm willing to accept that. I guess I just can't believe that the negativity that we continually breed by allowing ourselves to fall into the cycle of straying off plan, to binging, to perceived failure and finally to 'restarting'. Not only is that damaging to your momentum, but I can't imagine it does a whole lot of good to our state of mind. I mean, how are we supposed to find long-term success when ever time we make a mistake (even the big ones that result in a full week of eating poorly) we make ourselves 'start over' to clean the slate?

In the long run wouldn't it be more beneficial to be able to look back on this weight loss journey and see that you KEPT GOING no matter what happened? Wouldn't it feel better to be able to say you've been following this lifestyle for 6 months instead of only a week because you had a bad moment/day/week/month? I would think it would do be greater motivation to know you're a year into this journey than thinking you're just starting all because things slowed down and you found yourself not being as strict and sometimes making easy choices.

Again, maybe that's just me and it only make sense in my head; if that's the case, pardon my rambling. On the other hand, if anything rings even the slightest bit true, please, please, please the next time sometime less than healthy passes your lips (no matter the quantity), before you start beating yourself up afterwards, think about turning it around. Think about shedding a positive light on it (no matter how small) and turning it into a learning experience. Wouldn't it be great if my crazy theory worked and instead of finding yourself needing to 're-start' you simply found yourself pushing forward and continuing on your incredible, wonderful, life-long journey?

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TRACYZABELLE 4/8/2009 4:27AM

    **hiccup** my computer double posted

Comment edited on: 4/8/2009 4:28:20 AM

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TRACYZABELLE 4/8/2009 4:27AM

    ** Sorry I have not osted lately- just getting caught up since I jut got my laptop back!**

SUgar messes with me so bad! Once I let a little in I can not stop! But I need to put my foot down before I have no feet left! I have type II diabetes and already have what my PT thought was a mortons neuroma (Look it up in spark pages)It is scaring the crap outta me! WHen my eyes are blurry I think it is the diabetes and I tell myelf I nee to stop treating myself so badly! I have way too much of lif ahead of me and I do not want my poor daughter to have to bury me! Lets make a pact-- lets kick the sugar to the curb!

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