Saturday, September 18, 2010
Well it's been over a week since I've blogged, probably due to my lack of energy and motivation this week. I wasn't quite sure what the heck was wrong w/ me until a dear stopped by to lend some advice. Seems after I declared "my purpose" I got overwhelmed. It was like, okay now I've said it so I must do it, right?! Well thanks to the awesome advice of Kendra, (JUSTDUCKY1405), I'm not going to let myself stress! If it's meant to be it'll be, all in good time.
I've also made huge strides in making family peace! I had taken some necessary steps to achieve this but was still so angry inside. I pretended like I didn't care my sister was not in my life, like it didn't affect me, but it did. I can now tell how big of a weight I was carrying on my shoulders. My sister finally reached out and opened the lines of communication again, [awesome], and I was almost too angry to allow it. Not only had she not apologized but she did not acknowledge the abandonment I felt and expressed when she was not there for me during an abusive relationship. I was wanting my sister to rescue me and she didn't. I finally expressed how it made me feel and not only did she deny it, but she shut me out. At last, she has reopened the door. It took all I had and A LOT of convincing to let this go for now and respond with out anger, open the lines of communication and WANT to mend fences. Thanks to my great therapist and boyfriend, (MTLHEAD86 ), I reached back out to her...and guess what?! Come to find out she DOES care. She DOES love me. I DO have a complete family!
I'm officially out of my funk and feelin' ready to CONQUER ANYTHING! I WILL MAKE GOAL, I WILL FOLLOW MY DREAMS...and I'll do it with the support of my WHOLE family!