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2nd Epidural

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

This one hurt a bit more than the last. He went higher in the neck as he thought, after taking all the pictures, that that was where the main problem was coming from that was hurting my back so much. He thought if we could alleve the pain there, it would stop radiating into my back. He said we may need to do one more round.

The problem with this part of the neck is it is harder to get to. I just kept thinking to myself, "Please don't miss." They kept telling me I was doing really good and I was thinking that I was more concerned that the doctor was doing really good. I couldn't understand how someone couldn't do really good. Like anyone would move when someone is sticking a needle into your spine. Apparently, it does happen. I don't move a muscle as I just want it over.

So far so good. The pain is better than it was when I went in. That was better than it was when I went the first time. He said that it could be a three step process. To be pain free, I may have to go once more.

Right now, I have full range of motion of my neck. My back is still sore, but not like it was. I am planning to ride on Friday so we will see what happens then. Keeping fingers crossed that this works emoticon

The scale went down again today. I am so close to the 160's. Just half a pound away. I've been eating a lot of fish and turkey. For exercise, I have been getting in a lot of walks with young dog. These are not normal walks. This are calorie burning walks especially the training part. Hoping to get to those 160's on Friday when I weigh in. emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

1BEACHWALKER 5/23/2013 1:55AM

    Those kind of things are scary. I know when I just got a steroid shot in my knee the first time it was a Dr.. and it was pain free, no problems. Next time about 6 months later the phys. ass't did it and it hurt like crazy and I was very sore afterwards, couldn't even move. I complained to the Dr. about it. Never went back for another one! Although the first one had me pain free and could move very well, I took the 2nd one days to feel good! Darn woman must hit the muscle wrong, she was really distracted that day and kept talking like a blue streak to me.
When I got my laser eye surgery last fall, that is another time when you don't dare move while they are in your eye! That was so hard! Even though they put a special contact in it to keep it open, you still could move your head! emoticon
Glad you're feeling much better! Take it easy! Be careful when you go riding!
Good for you on the weight loss! That walking does take off the pounds! That is how I lost 40 pounds-mainly just walking a lot! emoticon emoticon emoticon

P.S. Thanks for commenting on my blog! I am doing much better after my fall! Arm still problematic, but I have hope in another week will be good to ride my bike again! emoticon

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BBONET 5/22/2013 10:22PM

    Hope you continue to do well!! emoticon emoticon

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SVELTEWARRIOR 5/22/2013 5:49PM

    I hope the injection works!!!! I have no doubt you will meet that 160 goal!!!!!!!

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SEPTEMBERSPIRIT 5/22/2013 5:41PM

    Good luck on your weigh in... I bet you'll be there!!

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TWNOMWE 5/22/2013 5:31PM

    emoticon with the walks and down ward numbers. Great news for your back /neck pain. I hope the pain stays away for good.


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GLC2009 5/22/2013 5:27PM

    i had an epidural for childbirth and the needle broke in my spine when i had a contraction, so, i got a spinal tap instead. i almost died....really. then once they saved me and baby was born, i had to lay for 3 days in one position on my back with sand bags around me so i could not move. after i was out of the hospital i had terrible headaches for months

it was very unpleasant.

so, yeah, not moving is a very good plan emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 5/22/2013 5:17PM

  Well, wishing you luck! It sure is no fun to go through! HUGS and quick healing to you.

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WALKSINLIGHT 5/22/2013 5:07PM

    Congratulations on your attitude with the epidural - it sounds very promising and so does your weight situation - great job !
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HEALTHYGRAMMY49 5/22/2013 5:03PM

    emoticon glad you're feeling better.

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CAPECODBABE 5/22/2013 4:20PM

    emoticon

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TXGRANDMA 5/22/2013 4:07PM

    So glad that you are feeling better after the second epidural! It would be disastrous for you to move during the needle being inserted, that's for sure! I think anybody would lie still! Very good though, the doctor sounds as if he knows what he is doing.

Good job on the weight loss! It feels good to pass yet another milestone! emoticon emoticon

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ENDUROVET 5/22/2013 4:04PM

    Well, that sounds cautiously optimistic! (even if you have to get a 3rd inj)

And of course I think the riding will be your best PT of all!

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Updates

Monday, May 20, 2013

Things have been pretty good. Sales are steady. Just got another accepted offer so I have 5 closings coming up. I am grateful it is not as crazy as it was with showings every night. This is just kind of slow and steady. I also re-listed a condo I had listed last fall.

The dog has been keeping me busy. She is a great workout in and of herself. We go for long walks and she never tires. The good thing is that she passes out when we get home and she's quiet. Sydney, the older dog, is still hanging in. The stairs are becoming a big problem for her, but we help her. She hung out with me at a neighbor's house Saturday night. So, she gets her time too.

Haven't been able to get back out to the barn. Saturday I had showings all day and yesterday was just too hot. The bugs were really bad.

Tomorrow is epidural #2. Actually, I am doing well from #1. I think it is a combination of the epidural and I read the bottle of Celebrex and realized that I am supposed to stay on it. Duh. I doesn't realize that refillable until October of 2013 meant I was supposed to keep taking it. It really helps a lot and it doesn't seem to have affect the Colitis at all. I'm hoping the 2nd epidural will leave me pain free. I wouldn't know what to do.

My son just dropped off two job applications so I am hoping he gets one of them. I still do not like his current job coach. She is extremely nice just not tough enough for the job she has. I listened to his DVR counselor and gave her the 60 days and we have accomplished nothing. Now, I get to change to the job coach that my aunt knows.

Things are pretty good. Nothing earth shattering going on which, for me, is a good thing :)

  
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1HAPPYSPIRIT 5/22/2013 8:39AM

    emoticon

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FLORIDASUN 5/22/2013 8:36AM

    GREAT job on the closings...you work so hard at your job you certainly deserve for things to come through for you! Hang in there fellow teddy...we can DO this together! emoticon

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JAZZEJR 5/22/2013 3:31AM

    Hang in there; things are looking up! :)

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IAMBIZI 5/20/2013 8:14PM

    I hope you are pain free soon!
bizi

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LASARRE 5/20/2013 8:09PM

    I had the same thing happen when I was about 8. I had a horse fall over on top of me. Didn't feel a thing at the time. Got right back up. I felt it 10 years later when they discovered a fractured bone in my spine.

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1CRAZYDOG 5/20/2013 5:47PM

  Well, hope the epidural goes well for you.

REALLY hope the job apps results in a job for you DS. **SIGH**

HUGS and hang in there.

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TXGRANDMA 5/20/2013 3:20PM

    Glad things are steady for you at work. You are doing so well! I guess your new dog was meant to be with you, she seems to be fitting in perfectly, and the old dog getting along well, too. I hate it when there are a lot of bugs to bother the horses. We really don't have that many here, not anything like the ones we had in Michigan that used to swarm the horses when we tried to ride. No such thing as deer flies down here...........sure don't miss them!

I had to laugh when I read Connie's comment. Lets see, I have fallen off more times than I can count, but mostly when I was a kid at home. Even had a horse rear up and come over backwards on me once, very blessed to have survived that, with just a bruised tail bone and scrape on my forehead from where a hoof grazed it! I guess that's the worst thing, when the horse falls with you on it! emoticon

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1BEACHWALKER 5/20/2013 2:26PM

    Glad all is good with you! emoticon
Things aren't so good for me. Took a spill off my bike on the 10th (details on my blog)-no broken bones thankfully. Have you ever fallen off your horse? Chris (Txgrandma) says she has. That would be awful to fall that far to the ground. That is why I got my 20 in. bike, not so far to fall if I did.
Have a great week! emoticon

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My Stars Must Be Misaligned

Friday, May 17, 2013

I don't know what I did to upset someone, but it seems like nothing is going right. We all know about my aunt's funeral that I didn't know about. Of course, facing a second epidural doesn't thrill me, but if the Celebrex helps, maybe the 2nd epidural will.

Yesterday, I decided to go and ride. My back has been better the last couple of days and I have a really busy weekend so I decided it was beautiful out and a great day to spend time in the saddle. The barn didn't go so good. I walked in and noticed something was wrong with JC. He wasn't eating. With JC, that is a huge red flag. He usually has everything gone within 20 minutes. He was colicking again. I walked him for 50 minutes which was pretty good exercise in dirt with a horse. At least this time, we didn't have to call the vet. All he needed was a mouthful of medicine and, within 30 minutes , his eyes were bright again and he was himself. He wasn't too thrilled to see me leave with his carrots.

I also need to mention that when I arrived, I saw an Illinois license plate. I knew it was my sister. She was in for my aunt's funeral which no one told me about. Mimi has two horses retired where JC is. My husband wanted to turn around, but I said absolutely not. I am not going to let her run me away. I didn't do anything to them. I walked in and said hi to the farrier who was there. I noticed one of the owners was in the barn which is unusual at that time of the day, but her daughter, who usually runs it, is off until Tuesday so Carrie worries. She was talking to my sister.

I noticed JC wasn't right and called Carrie over. I left to walk JC. My husband went back to his stall to get my phone and I noticed my sister talking to him. I couldn't believe after everything she had the gall to speak to him or him to her. He told me that she just said, "My horse colicks all the time." I need to remember how narcissistic Mimi is. Whatever happens to you or one of your pets, she has had it ten times worse.

All I kept thinking to myself is what a gutless human being. She let my brother do all the speaking and doesn't even have the guts to face me. I was willing her to come in the ring. The only thing she did was shout out asking if I wanted her to walk JC. Excuse me. Really! Are you f'ing kidding me. You can't speak to me in close to a year, you can't call me when our aunt passes away, you let our brother come to my house demanding everything that is my mother's and all you can ask me is if I want you to walk JC? Huh? What planet does she live on. I said no and kept walking.

I am proud of myself however. I didn't get angry or stressed. Normally, in a situation like this, I would find myself shaking, but I didn't. I just didn't care. She chose to be nothing in my life and she is nothing in my life.

I am sorry. I am not a hypocrite. I don't play games. I could not go through all I have been through with her and then act like we are best buds. NO not in this lifetime. She made her choices and she can live with them!

Well, maybe I have had my three fer. With JC alone, 2 colicks and an abscess, we should be done.

Things have to get better.

I will throw in a positive. I did get relist of a property I had last night and the dogs are doing great together!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

IAMBIZI 5/20/2013 1:34AM

    hugs to you for being strong and not letting her get to you.
bizi emoticon

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JAZZEJR 5/19/2013 10:21AM

    Keep the faith. You're right--things will get better. Hang in :)

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FRENCHSEAMS 5/18/2013 7:31PM

    Well, I'm glad you got the relisting..

I had a similar mom who would listen to my complaints about people and say "consider the source" and I do believe she's right. Narcissism is a personality disorder that people often don't have any insight into or control over. Even professionals say it's hard to treat. It is horrible and stressful to have any type of relationship with such people, but much of the behavior isn't intentional but more a lack of personal development.





Comment edited on: 5/19/2013 7:48:00 PM

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FLORIDASUN 5/18/2013 5:56PM

    Some people just aren't happy unless they are raining havoc on another. Siblings seem to be especially good at this. Makes me happy sometimes I'm a 'lonely only'...sometimes.

I hope that some day you and your sister can realize that the stupid hateful things that she has aimed toward you only boomerang and fling dirt back in her face double time!

I also am so happy that you didn't back down and let her intimidate you the way that she seems to have been able to in the past.

As far as I can see...it's her loss!

Hugs and happy JC is better...I'm sure he misses his momma and was so happy that you came to be with him.

That's the whole problem with a horse...I'd want to move it right into my house and tuck it in each night! emoticon emoticon

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JUSTME29 5/17/2013 9:11PM

    I'm sorry JC wasn't doing well, but I'm glad you were there and able to address the problem immediately before it got worse.

I won't even mention your sister because she doesn't deserve a mention. Well, I guess I did huh? Just goes to show how invasive some people can be.

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LOPEYP 5/17/2013 8:13PM

    Stay strong and focused! You handled it correctly.

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CAPECODBABE 5/17/2013 7:39PM

    emoticon Things will get better emoticon

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GRACEOMALLEY 5/17/2013 6:14PM

    I'm sorry things were a bit hinky, but life tends to go that way. I blame it on that Murphy idiot and his law.

As to your sister, when I was a child my very wise mother used to often remind me to consider the source when I couldn't make sense of another person's bad behavior or meanness. That advice continues to serve me. The responsibility for what your sister or brother (or anyone else, for that matter) chooses to do or the way they decide to behave is neither your fault nor your responsibility. If they are over 5 years old and have not the brains nor the class nor the courtesy you expect, that's on them. Same with your children - you can teach them when they are young, but as they age and become individuals if they choose to ignore or violate those teachings, that is not your doing.

Yes, it stinks that people can be so mean and thoughtless and manipulating and manipulated and cruel and generous and kind and hateful and all the other stuff. Unfortunately, you and I can't make it so that all those negative human aspects suddenly vanish.

Breathe deeply and be glad JC wasn't too bad and you could walk it off. Let your sister have no more of your time or energy than she deserves and/or earns. If that is ZERO - so be it. Life is way too short to intentionally waste any of it on people who diminish your joy and happiness.
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SVELTEWARRIOR 5/17/2013 6:14PM

    emoticon

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TXGRANDMA 5/17/2013 3:30PM

    Things will get better, Nina! I just know it! JC is such a sweetheart, so sorry he had to go through colic, that is why I always keep a vial of Banamine in my horse ER kit! Usually 10 cc's of that, IV into a 1,000 pound horse, and they are as good as new! Usually give at the rate of 1cc per 100 lbs, though I rarely have given more than 10 cc's, even in a horse over 1000 lbs. Glad that he is better, whatever you used must have worked.

You did the right thing in dealing with your sister. Like you said she is nothing to you anymore and I don't blame you for that. She acted like a cowardly vulture and all you can do is pray for her! Just treat her like a stranger with respect and nothing negative. Good for you! emoticon emoticon

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PEPPYPATTI 5/17/2013 2:30PM

    Sorry to hear about your problems with your sis. My sister Judy did not speak to me for 10 years & I have yet to know what I did that pissed her off-lol! That is family for you! So glad to hear JC is OK!
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ADRIENNIE 5/17/2013 1:18PM

    emoticon

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My Son is at it Again

Thursday, May 16, 2013

I think the last time I wrote about him, I wrote that I was so proud that my son was working and getting all these jobs. Well, I found out that he is helping this guy out, but he isn't getting paid. He is just using our car to schlep the guy around.

When I called him on it, he got in my face telling me what he was and wasn't going to do. I told him if he couldn't follow the rules here, he could go live with that guy. They can be bums together. We pay for everything for my son and he has the nerve to look us in the faces and lie? Believe me, I don't deal with that well.

His job coach has really been working to find him a job. She sends in his applications and resume for him. Of course, as has always been his wont, he does nothing. He does go once or twice a week and work at my friend's house, but that is definitely not enough to support himself.

The other thing I find weird is why this 50 year old guy wants to hang around a 19 year old. Speaking to him, he seems to have a lot of the same mentality as my son, but I do believe he is taking advantage of Ben. Ben spent all day helping him fix a bathroom and now Ben says he will get paid on the 3rd. Yeah when the guy gets his disability check. I'm really not liking this. I especially don't like being lied to!

If it is not one thing, it is another.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GLC2009 5/22/2013 5:34PM

    my first thought is, i wouldn't let him use the car. period. or if he does he has to put in fuel, oil and wash the car. or pay you a certain amount of money in advance to use it. also, i know he's 19 and technically not a kid, but, if things keep up it might be an idea to talk to the 50 year old man??? i don't know if that would work, but, i'd want to tell him to not use my son for free labor. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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ENDUROVET 5/22/2013 4:07PM

    Catching up on my reading - oh my, it's always something, isn't it???

I guess you never finish raising 'em - getting bigger & scarier as my son approaches DRIVING AGE... He's gonna hafta EARN the privilege of that vehicle; otherwise he is stuck riding his mule ;-) !!!

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LYNCHD05 5/17/2013 10:04PM

    A very worrisome situation.

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SVELTEWARRIOR 5/17/2013 6:10PM

    I find this 50 year old very creepy. Maybe we need to take the car away from your son. I am sorry you are going through this.

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GRACEOMALLEY 5/17/2013 3:30PM

    Good you can vent here, but your son needs to find a new friend/job/social scene/etc. There is something out of kilter in this scenario and this older dude does not sound like anyone that might inspire the younger set to higher aspirations or greater things in life. This is a relationship that just doesn't sound right in any way. Are there other folks or things your son likes that you may be able to hint around and move him toward? At his age, he won't likely take well to being told what to do or who to see, but maybe there is a way to re-direct his attentions? I wish you all the best in this. emoticon

Comment edited on: 5/17/2013 5:54:48 PM

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KELLI9001 5/17/2013 12:24PM

    So sorry to hear your family is going through these problems.

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JUSTME29 5/17/2013 9:08AM

    I'm sorry to hear that. I hope the job coach is able to turn something up for him. I just wish (mostly for your sake) that he would put forth the effort himself.

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FLORIDASUN 5/17/2013 8:42AM

    Oh...my dear friend this makes my heart sad. Ben is definitely under a BAD influence...my mother's heart tells me this. I'd make sure that those ties are broken and quickly. I wrote a whole long sad blog about how our young adults are SO influenced by bad people. I just have a bad feeling about this whole hinky situation.

Big hugs and serious blessings are being whisked your way! Love and light too...for good measure! emoticon emoticon

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CAPECODBABE 5/17/2013 8:04AM

    emoticon

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1CRAZYDOG 5/17/2013 7:59AM

  Holy moly . . . I wouldn't know what a 50 yr. old would want to be with a 19 yr. old for, but I gottta say, any ideas I do have aren't falling under the good category!

It's hard, doing the tough love thing, but I hope you can with your son. We had to do it with ours. Not easy.

HUGS and prayers.

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ANJAYS-JOURNEY 5/17/2013 7:45AM

    oh no, hope things settle down soon

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Decisions...

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Ugh! I hate when things happen that involve my family who don't speak to me. Last night, I got a call from the one aunt who I am still close to. She is my mother's sister. She wanted to let me know that my sister had called my cousin to tell her that my aunt passed away. The aunt who passed away is my dad's sister. I haven't seen her for about 7 years. I saw her at my mother's funeral, but she said nothing to me. I talked to her twice since my mother passed away, but she more or less blew me off. Her kids never invited us to anything they have had as a family. My cousin didn't even invite me to her wedding. She invited my mother and my sisters and brother, but not me or my husband.

I know my Aunt expects me to go to the funeral, but I just have no desire to. I felt nothing when I heard she died. I feel nothing for any of them. The only thing that bothers me is how things will "look" to others. For all anybody knows, I don't even know about this. If Shirley hadn't called, I wouldn't have a clue. None of my cousins or my siblings called. I guess they really do what me out of the family.

I can't be a hypocrite. None of these people mean anything to me. They have made it clear over the years that I mean nothing to them either so I have to just stop stressing about it. It bothered me a lot in my aunt's obituary none of her siblings were mentioned. Not my dad or my other aunts. I think that is bad form.

Oh well...once again it proves you can't pick your family only your friends.

On another note, I did take Celebrex for my back and it really helped. My UC doc said I can take it with the UC. I think you just need to break the pain cycle. I heard back from the epidural doc and I am going for the second one on Tuesday. He thinks also that my back is just radiating pain from my neck. I really hope the second one works. The first one really helped my neck and shoulders. I guess the medication didn't go far enough down for my back.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FLORIDASUN 5/17/2013 10:10AM

    Drama...HATE it! I'd definitely do as your heart tells you. Why would you go there just to be treated miserably once again. I do agree with JustME if your aunt had called you for support I'd do the best I could to be there for her. Maybe you could meet her after, or sit in the back row with her and make a fast exit.

I'm appalled at how badly your family treats you...just appalled. It shouldn't be that way in this world...really it shouldn't! As an only child I've often wondered what it would be like having siblings...your family reminds me that I might be better off as an 'only lonely' after all. emoticon

I have plenty of girlfriends and I call them my 'chosen' sistas...I also have lots of my wonderful friends here in Spark kingdom...I call them my 'sparkling' sistas!

We are so blessed to have this wonderful group of women around us! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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PATTYKLAVER 5/17/2013 7:11AM

    I am glad you are getting some relief for your back. Don't let other people bother you when they so obviously don't care.

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JUSTME29 5/16/2013 8:48AM

    I'm glad the meds helped and that the epidural helped your neck - just sorry that you have to go in for a second one. Hopefully this one will make all the difference.

The only person (aside from yourself and your nuclear family) that you need to take into consideration here is your one aunt that you are still close to. If she wants/needs the support at the funeral then go for her sake. If she has other support or otherwise doesn't need you there then don't go. I'm sure she will understand. So what if you give "them" one more thing to talk about - at this point their conversations are no longer your concern. They didn't bother to tell you about your other aunt's death or funeral so clearly they don't expect you to attend either.

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ANJAYS-JOURNEY 5/16/2013 7:55AM

    Glad you are feeling better, sorry about your family issues, personally I would not go, but that is me, but do what is right for you!!

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CAPECODBABE 5/16/2013 5:32AM

    I'm glad you are feeling better.
As for the funeral, just listen to your heart. emoticon

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SEPTEMBERSPIRIT 5/16/2013 4:43AM

    I think you should do what YOU feel comfortable doing. I can completely relate to how detached you feel and how you don't want to play the hypocrite. Who cares what anybody things - it's how you feel that matters.

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JAZZEJR 5/15/2013 10:53PM

    You know what you want to do; just do it. Your opinion of yourself is the one that counts. There is a saying--We would stop worrying about what other people think about us if we knew how seldom they did.

Comment edited on: 5/16/2013 8:17:04 AM

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IAMBIZI 5/15/2013 10:26PM

    I am sorry for the family drama. I think that you can go with your gut here and not feel bad about not going.
sorry that things aren't different, that is just the way it is.
good luck iwth the second epi!
bizi

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LYNCHD05 5/15/2013 9:41PM

    Tis is such N awful family story. I can understand how you feel and how you do not want to go. Really, what is the point. You will have to think about this and decide what feels right to you.
Glad to,hear the back is getting better.

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