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JC Update-- answering questions

Friday, December 19, 2014

We had a meeting with C today. I believe we worked everything out. Does she clean stalls on Sundays ...No. Can we go out there on Sundays and take care of it and I ride him..Yes.

His feet are in great shape. Better shape than they have been in in years. He is happy and healthy. He has only had one bout with Colic since he got there. He used to colic several times a month. C has agreed to show him at the first show, but let me practice to get used to the show ring again. She also thinks we need to see how he handles it after being out of it for so many years.

I am comfortable with the way all resolved. I am not completely happy with the lack of cleaning on Sundays, but I am happy to know that there is someone there who looks after them on Sundays. I am a very over protective mother.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LOPEYP 12/20/2014 6:27AM

    sounds like a positive meeting. of course you want to make sure that your baby is taken care of. that's only natural.

Have fun with JC!

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ENDUROVET 12/19/2014 11:01PM

    I'm glad you had a chance already to get things talked through...

"No foot, no horse" is as true as it's ever been!
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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Into the Fire...

Thursday, December 18, 2014

From the frying pan that is. OMG is the drama with JC ever going to end. My fuse is at its end and I am ready to find another home for him. Unfortunately, I have spent so many years in the Saddlebred world here that I know I would just be harming him because I am ticked.

So, continuing on from the weekend's bullsh*t...
I was going to try to get to the barn today and I did try. Then the freezing rain came. I had an appointment for a health assessment for our insurance. I couldn't risk missing that. I contacted C to let her know I wouldn't be able to make it. I told her I would try to make it tomorrow, but I couldn't guarantee it. I then said that if she had planned to work him because I goofed today, that was fine as I would go spend time with him on Sunday.

Then she dropped the next bomb...Oh CCStables is closed on Sundays. That is JC's day off. What? Ha? Huh? If I recall, that is why we left the last barn we were at. You are so lazy about cleaning stalls that you want to close the barn so we don't know that they are not getting cleaned? No don't think so.

I said that maybe putting him in partial training wasn't such a good idea. I will take him out of any sort of training and go back to just board. My kids will come on Sundays and clean his stall so you don't have to get off the couch and the other person, who has a horse in training,
doesn't have to clean his stall again. She had the gall to tell me that her boyfriend went and cleaned his stall on Sunday. I knew this was a lie. I contacted J, who I know spends Sundays out there to clean her own horse's stalls, to see if she would clean JC's stall and I would do her horse's stall this coming Sunday. I know boyfriend didn't clean the stall. I told C I knew this and she said that she wasn't going to discuss it by text but only face to face. I gave her several times we could meet. None of them fit her schedule.

Finally, Brian and I agreed that he would take time off tomorrow afternoon to settle this once and for all. Dealing with a horse is not like dealing with a dog. Trying to find the next place to move them is not easy. I know every place available around here and none are good.

Now, we are meeting with 22 year old C tomorrow. Of course her parents have her believing that she is a princess and everyone else is wrong. I am making Brian come because I don't deal well with spoiled children. We pay too much money each month to deal with this crap. I moved JC because I was told by C and Crazy that the barn is open 7 days a week. JC is not in full training nor will he ever be. No one will ever again tell me what is going to happen with him. He and I have spent the last 5 years together. Actually, we have spent his entire life together, but he was in training for his first 5 years. He is my child. He is my go to. He is my get away from everything. When that gets goofed up, so does everything.

I feel like I have been run over by a Mack truck. I don't usually go on Sundays because I work, but I want the option when we don't. I also can't stand people who lie. I have caught C in many lies. I have to keep telling myself she is a child. But, she is a child to whom I pay a lot of money. The only other place we can go is to the trainer where JC started. But, that would be full training and I could never go out and just ride him and spend time with him.

I am so drained and tired from this. I swear we were lied to when we chose to move there. Everything I told her about why I was unhappy where we were has occurred here now. The big issue I have is that I was very straightforward about what we were looking for and she lied! I hate liars.

Obviously, I have some decisions to make. I do still believe that this is still the best place for JC and I have to put him first. Maybe we will push the showing, but we will not give up our Sundays or let him lay in his dirty stall!

Now, I have talked to more former trainers and horse friends who say that they don't clean stalls every day. OK, if this is the norm, I should still have the right to go and clean his stall and I should have been told that when I met with C before I moved there. I found out that even the barn I came from stopped cleaning stalls every day.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ENDUROVET 12/19/2014 6:10PM

    ThemFolk already said it all - I could not imagine NOT having 24/7 access to the facilities where My Preciouses were boarded! (We never abused privileges at Lorraine's - but what made up our mind to buy A Place of Our Own was when her drug-addled great nephew burned down the pump house, less than 50 yds from the barn where our Shawna was on layup!)
Now, MY stalls don't get cleaned every day, but my ponies just come in for feeding, then they're turned out. Maybe this is a blessing in disguise if you move JC to a better facility!

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THEMFOLK 12/19/2014 4:25PM

    How are his feet holding up? Do they look like he spends a lot of time standing in dirty bedding?

My next question would be whether or not he's getting enough exercise. Bored and over-amped horses are more likely to pick up vices - and are they getting enough feed? The WORST boarding situation I've ever been witness to involved a barn manager who cut corners on feed by feeding one thin flake of alfalfa to each horse per day, which meant that the horses quickly ate their rations and then stood around with nothing to do all day but eat their bedding - dirty, wet straw - and eventually ended up passing fecal liths, a painful and potentially life-threatening process.

Lastly, does he have access to enough water? Most places have automatic waterers, but is there someone there to make sure they're working every day? A good friend of mine lost one of his horses because the barn he boarded at was so snotty about everything that he lost every argument about whether or not his horses had adequate water, but the dispute ended abruptly when the horse colicked badly and died from a large impaction of dry matter in his gut.

I don't mean to tell you these things to scare you, but to give you ammunition. Daily care and access to your horse is very important, even if it's inconvenient to your horse's landlady.

I sure wish you luck!

Comment edited on: 12/19/2014 4:27:45 PM

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 12/19/2014 1:09PM

GOOD LUCK! I hope it all works out well for you.

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JUSTME29 12/19/2014 8:59AM

    She may not have lied to you when you first moved JC there, she may have intended to have him available at any time, and may have intended to be there 7 days a week. As she started though, and realized how much work she was really going to have to do, she may have changed her mind. It certainly does sound like she is outright lying to you now though. I don't know anything about the care and feeding of horses, but I do think that if you pay a substantial amount of money you should receive excellent service. If you want to go clean out his stall yourself, or simply go spend some time with him on Sundays, I can't see why that wouldn't be allowed. Her boyfriend may have also lied to her - so she may actually think that he cleaned stalls for her.

It sounds like a face to face clearing of the air is just what's needed. I hope it all works out for you there because it really does sound like it's the best place for him in many ways.

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EDLEAR 12/19/2014 2:50AM

    Gosh, I've never heard of such a thing, but maybe I'm not the norm. Our stalls get cleaned every day. Period, and end of discussion.
Owning and running a barn is a super lot of work and not really for spoiled children or divas. This is certainly a conundrum. I hope that you can get this resolved soon, and don't have to look for a new barn for JC. Moving is expensive and stressful.
Good luck

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Small Steps

Wednesday, December 17, 2014

I have decided to take small steps to reach my goals. We joined the gym and the kids are getting me there. I really don't want to go today, but I will. I went yesterday and did the elliptical, the treadmill and the pool. Today, I will stick to the elliptical and the treadmill as I don't want to over do it.

I am cutting back on eating out as well. While things are quiet, we have to keep an eye on our finances. We used to go out a lot because I was always home working and it was my way of getting out of the house. Since we go to the gym, I get out of the house pretty much every day now so that is no longer an issue.

I set a new goal to just lose 10 lbs by the end of March. I think that is realistic and doable. I see my doc next week for my yearly checkup. I am sure she will not be happy with my weight, but she will be happy that we joined the gym and I am working on things.

One step at a time and I will get there!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SVELTEWARRIOR 12/17/2014 9:36PM

    Sounds like a good and sensible plan. You can do it!!!

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GRACEOMALLEY 12/17/2014 6:22PM

    Sounds like a good plan! One thought I've heard that always reminds me to be rational in my approach is:

You didn't gain the weight in a few weeks or a few months, so don't expect it to go away in a few weeks or a few months. Be honest about what you can accomplish and strive to get to that point.


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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 12/17/2014 4:45PM

    So true! You are taking steps and making small changes to live the life you want. Good luck and have fun!

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MISSM66 12/17/2014 2:41PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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PHHHISC 12/17/2014 12:45PM


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Some Positives :)

Monday, December 15, 2014

It seems like everything I have been writing lately has been negative. I have had enough negativity for a while. So I decided to focus on some positive things.

The gym has been working out great. Went there today with DD and a friend of mine met us. We spent over an hour changing off on the different machines. My friend had never tried any so we had fun. I really like the elliptical machine. It definitely works your glutes HA! Last week, I went swimming and floored myself. I could do laps without stopping. I guess doing the treadmill and Leslie Sansone at home has paid off :)

JC is doing wonderfully being in training again and loves to be part of the program. Aside from the Sunday issue, everything else is great. He was a little testy when I rode him on Friday. He did decide to do his "spin" twice, but he wasn't so happy that mom doesn't let him get away with it anymore HA! At this time of year, they are all bored. It is dreary out, the barn is closed so they are going to try to "play" with you. Even when he goes out now, he will only stay for 2 to 3 hours if the sun isn't out. Then he sits at the gate and whinnies to come in.

Work has been quiet, but at least I do have stuff going on. I got an accepted offer for some buyers 2 weeks ago. I listed a house this weekend. I know I have 4 or 5 listings coming up in the next 2 months so I am not panicking about the quiet. I am actually using it to get myself to the gym while I can :)

My son is doing well at work and they are giving him more hours. He has matured so much in this last year. For all the years of everyone telling me that he was disabled etc, he is much more mature and responsible than a lot of males I know who are older than he is. He is just going to be 21 in January which is probably like a girl who is 30 HA!

DD likes her new job. She is also doing well in college. She is such a responsible young lady. I am very proud of her.

So everything is not doom and gloom. I just blog about things to vent when I get upset and then it makes me feel better. I forget to pass on the good things as well emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SNOWFILLY 12/16/2014 6:27AM

    emoticon emoticon

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SVELTEWARRIOR 12/15/2014 11:43PM

    Everyone needs to vent from time to time.......... but everyone also needs to count the Blessings in their lives and it sounds like you have quite a few!!

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TXGRANDMA 12/15/2014 9:05PM

    So glad to hear that things are going so well with your children now! That is really the important thing, the legacy we leave with our children! I am sure that your daughter will do great things, and how great that your son is maturing! I know that you were worried about them both, and it must be so NICE now that they are both on the right track!

Your business sounds as if it is going great too! I so admire you for changing careers and being such a huge success! emoticon

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 12/15/2014 9:02PM

    Counting blessings and good things always lifts the spirits. Have fun!

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THEMFOLK 12/15/2014 7:38PM

    It's so easy to get tunnel vision, especially in the wintertime. It really helps to get outside and/or get active but it's also too easy to get stuck in a rut rather than do something about it, which makes your commitment to work out in the gym an inspiration.

Nice, positive blog. Very timely for many of us.

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GRACEOMALLEY 12/15/2014 7:15PM

    Pat yourself on the back for seeing you were putting out negative perspective and grabbing hold of that. I know it doesn't always work, but believing and viewing the better side of stuff - much like Pollyanna - has gotten me through a lot of tough times. As you referenced, there are good things going on and there's nothing wrong with you focusing on those.

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TWIRLNYC 12/15/2014 7:13PM


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WIFE49 12/15/2014 5:14PM

    Good job on the positive thoughts!!

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RAPUNZEL53 12/15/2014 5:06PM


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Is It Just Me?

Sunday, December 14, 2014

I'm beginning to think that I expect too much from people. I guess I expect people to give me the same type of service I give my clients. Yes I work hard and I expect that from others as well. I didn't think it was too much to ask of people who I pay to do a service for me, but maybe I am wrong and I do expect too much.

I'm thinking I lost my assistant because I expected him to work more than 25 hours a week which was really more like 10 hours a week. Maybe that isn't the way it is anymore. Maybe I am asking too much.

More recently, I have been having issues at the barn where JC is. Now, remember, these people are also my clients. I haven't gotten paid by them as they are buyers and sellers pay commissions. I have spent hours on the phone and in meetings with them trying to find them a farm and working to get them the farm that JC is at. I never thought anything of it as it is what I do for all my buyers. I understand that buying a property can be very frustrating and confusing. This deal especially as the farm is off limits right now as the current owner has declared bankruptcy. Long story short. The farm was sold at Sheriff's sale, my buyers were going to buy it from the bank. Before they could do that, the owner filed for bankruptcy and that put a halt to everything.

I spent hours gathering information and keeping my buyers informed as to what the options were. We are still looking at places, but the only place their daughter (JC's trainer who I'll call C) wants is this farm. It is newer and has a lot of bells and whistles.

Now, let's flip things. I pay her or them a lot of money a month to take care of JC. C doesn't live on the premises. The woman who filed bankruptcy does and she is rather bat sh*t crazy. We don't know how much she can be trusted. Still C insists she has to have a day off. She doesn't go anywhere near the barn on Sundays. So we don't know what crazy lady is doing. JC did colic a couple weeks ago and C was there and caught it. But, I still worry that C isn't checking on them or having anyone check on them on Sundays.

They have had many meetings with crazy lady as she doesn't think C takes proper care of the barn. No she is not the cleanest person I have ever seen. Yes, she does complain a lot and let's daddy and mommy fight her battles.

Last Sunday we went out to spend time with JC. They used to get to go out on Sundays. But, C refused to feed Crazies horses so Crazy won't let out C's horses. We walked in the barn and it just reeked of ammonia from all of the horse urine. More than likely their stalls weren't cleaned since Saturday morning. We literally had to nearly strip JC's stall completely as it was so filthy. OMG, our eyes were burning and DH was rather upset that barn wasn't aired out and the stalls weren't cleaned.

It was one thing in the summer and fall when all the doors were open and the horses were outside. But, in the winter, it is all enclosed and now no one will let them out so they are sitting in it all day. Apparently, one of Crazies borders called C and reemed her a new one for how filthy her stalls were on Sunday. She complained to me that Sunday is the only day she has off and she shouldn't have to come to the barn. She deserves a day off.

All that is fine and dandy, but when you are 22 years old, and you are just starting out to establish yourself and have no money to pay someone, there are times you have to work 7 days a week. I told her that. I felt that even if she doesn't work the horses on Sunday, she can still come and let them out in the mornings when the weather is nice and she can pick out the stalls. At the very least she can hire someone. She said no one wanted to do it.

Remember, we are only talking 6 horses here. We aren't talking a barnful. There are actually 10 horses, but C owns 4 herself. This shouldn't be that difficult.

I knew that I couldn't get out there today to clean JC's stall and, for the money we pay, Brian didn't feel we should have to. I texted C's mom (who is the barn manager). She texted me back and said C would call me. C called me and gave me the same story about she had to have a day off and it wouldn't hurt them to sit in the dirty stalls for one day. My question was going to be ok you sit in your sh*t for a day and let me know how it feels. I didn't say anything.

I again called to talk to the managers (her parents). Father wouldn't let me speak to her mother and just yelled at me, "What do you want!" I couldn't believe he would take that attitude with the amount we pay them. I was so dumbfounded I couldn't even speak. I also remembered the big sale I have coming with them and I didn't want to burn any bridges. So, I really said nothing and just hung up.

I found out from another person out at the barn who I know goes every Sunday that C contacted her to clean JC's stall. There was no way in h*ll that C was going to get off her couch.

When I started my business, I worked 24/7 and still pretty much do if I have to. Is it just me or does anyone else see something amiss here?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ENDUROVET 12/19/2014 6:15PM

    OMG, just backed up to read this!!! It isn't as if the HORSES take a day off from eating, drinking, pooping, & urinating - what the hell is that brat thinking??!!?? emoticon

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GOLDENRODFARM 12/16/2014 5:19PM

    I feel that, she can have a day off if that is what she wants but she should pay someone else to pick up the slack, But as a young person just starting, I would have at that age been at the barn if just to do chores twice a day. I have a farm and chores are always there, even if I am going somewhere for the day, chores get done first and when I get home, everyone needs to be fed, watered an cleaned up, not to mention hugged and kissed lol, as my princess Apache thinks!

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JUSTME29 12/15/2014 11:20PM

    I have mixed feelings. I do think everyone is entitled to a day off. On the other hand, I bring home work every night and/or every weekend because it needs to be done and no-one else is going to do it for me. If she is starting a business, she needs to expect to put in more hours than she will maybe need to once she is established and has employees. I have a hard time believing that she can find no-one to do the job - surely some high school or college kid would be willing to muck stalls for a few extra bucks. If her business is caring for horses, the horses should be cared for.

The response of her parents when you called goes a long way towards explaining why C is the way she is.

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GRACEOMALLEY 12/15/2014 7:10PM

    It is not you. People seem to feel entitled, want something for nothing, want things handed over without effort on their part. Meanwhile - if you are paying for care 7 days a week, it should be provided 7 days a week. If C isn't doing it, then she darn well better have somebody trustworthy who is taking care of that aspect of things. You paid for a service, you should be getting what you pay for - regardless of who filed bankruptcy or what bank took over what property. Two DIFFERENT things.

Comment edited on: 12/15/2014 7:11:21 PM

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4-1HEALTHYCYNDI 12/15/2014 2:17PM

    **HUGS** I don't know barn systems but it seems that if you are paying someone to keep him 7 days a week they should do the work 7 days a week. whether they hire someone or do it themselves. Sorry you seem to be having all this trouble. It's tough when business gets complicated.


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SVELTEWARRIOR 12/14/2014 11:36PM

    It's not you. It seems there just isn't a work ethic anymore... I swear it is harder and harder to get people to do their job.

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TXGRANDMA 12/14/2014 8:00PM

    I agree with you that SOMEONE needs to check on the boarded horses and clean their stalls every day. If C can't do it or won't do it, she should hire someone. When you have a barn full of people's horses you can't leave them stalled up all day with the doors closed in the winter. They need airing out and exercise. Even if the weather was bad, she could turn them out in the covered arena for a while. You know, the ammonia in the air in a closed up barn can hurt a horse's respiratory system. I wonder if C knows that?

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MUSIC2HISEARS 12/14/2014 7:35PM

    That is so wrong that she isn't willing to bend a little to do what needs to be done. I'm so sorry that you are having to go through with that.

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GOLFGMA 12/14/2014 7:29PM

    So sorry for your situation. Hoping all can be ironed out this week.

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