Sunday, November 07, 2010
I'm tired from the emotional roller coaster I spent the week riding.
Wednesday was my mid-year review at work. My annual review this year wasn't great, so I wasn't looking forward to it. Besides, my upbringing has made me very leery of the words "I need to talk to you." (When my father said it, he usually followed it up by knocking my head sideways). Well, my review glowed! My boss said she's extremely happy with how I'm doing.
But here's where it gets crazy. I knew the apartment complex would be paving my section of the parking lot on Thursday, so I had to be out for 24 hours (they said there would be parking and walkways available, but the parking filled up fast and none of it was within walking distance for ME). My ex said I could crash in his spare room overnight. Well, it DID give me a chance to see my son.
But his place IS the apartment I picked out for us when we were together. I spent the entire evening listening to him talk about his new girlfriend and watching him scratch various body parts (UGH). Well, at least I got to see my son, and ex DID let me watch Iron Chef America (he usually watches World's Dumbest Criminals -- I am not kidding). I slept very poorly, since I'm a touchy sleeper under the best of circumstances. I then had to go to work after only a sponge bath with baby wipes (his shower isn't working).
I went to work exhausted and really blue. I tried so hard to make the marriage work, but he wasn't interested. My beautiful son, who should have a career and a family now, is confined to bed and can't even talk. Mr. Can't Bother To Shower has a new relationship and I'm living on fantasies because nobody will even look at me.
I should probably stop whining now.