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How the House is Involved

Saturday, June 12, 2010

All you have to do is watch some eps of Hoarders, Clean House, How Clean is your House? and you quickly see the correlation between disorganization, holding onto outdated stuff, and pure filth as it relates to mental health. Is my home ready to be on an ep of Hoarders? Certainly not, but it does reflect that the last 20 years have not all been hunky dory.

Not to sound sexist (and if you knew me in person you would know that I am 100 percent Feminist) but when a Woman's home becomes a pigstye then you know Houston we have a problem. The home is traditionally the woman's "place" but moreso I think it is women who care about the state of the cave - generally, men don't "get it." If a man has a comfortable bed, a television, a place for his hobbies and a woman to take care of the cleaning, laundry, dishes etc... he's a happy camper.

Yeah there are a few men who care more then their womenfolk; I have a girlfriend's husband who is the Neat Freak, but on the whole (I have three brothers, married for 20 years, and a son), men don't really get worked up when the house is a wreck.

The state of this house reflects many things, some uncomfortable and some flat out sad and disturbing to me.

1.) Financially, this house is a burden to us. We have tried to sell twice and both times the economy shortly collasped (yes we are the cause of 9-11, the crash AND the home mortgage collaspe). This makes me angry and I've taken it out on this house by ignoring it.

2.) Caring for a house is a symbol of traditional womanhood. When I met hubby 20 years ago, I had to drop my career and what I had always thought my future would be. Not to gloss over it but this put me in counseling for four years and we almost divorced. There was quite some serious fallout and my role as woman became totally re-defined.

For a long time I resented that, and to this day it comes out by not doing housework for a husband and two kids who generate quite a bit of mess (all three are packrats; I am not).

3.) I'm very sensitive to my environment - so much so that husband would actually clean the house (before kids) because he knew that would improve our bedroom time. emoticon

When the house is dirty, messy and disorganized, I feel hopeless, depressed and YUCK. Because of my susceptibility to depression this then becomes a vortex that is hard to pull out of.

So when I post about cleaning, organizing, throwing stuff out --- and even decorating --- it is actually significant to my mental health.

BTW I've spent the entire week cleaning my son's bedroom. About three trash bags later, tons of new storage tubs (over 12, 18 quart tubs of LEGO), and a few pieces of new furniture, his room is now completed.

Details on his room

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BUDSNRAINA 1/21/2012 8:05AM

    Keep up the great work! I began neatening my daughters room at the end of each day because I was tired of the mess(she is almost 5) - she has decided she likes it clean and can now find what she wants to play with - and has been trying to keep up with her mess on her own now! I just keep telling her what a great job she is doing and it seems to be working.

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HEALTHYRED 7/18/2010 9:18AM

    Wow I really love this room, especially the ceiling lamp!

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ZESTYLADY 6/13/2010 6:06PM

    I just spent my whole weekend trying to clear out spaces consumed by my hubby's inability to let go of broken things. It wears me down that so much time is spent doing this same thing over and over and over. I remain ever hopeful that something will change for him to be able to let go of so much crap. Until then...i just keep moving it around! Sheesh!

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SURLYGIRL 6/13/2010 10:36AM

    Another nice room. You've been busy and very productive. Good for you!

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HAPPY0408 6/13/2010 12:25AM

    I know what you mean. I feel so much better after a clean organized home. I have been putting it off, but reading your blog just motivated me to declutter again. The only way I will feel energized is to have a clean organized home again. So tomorrow the plan will be to just get a start. I will start with the kitchen. Thanks for sharing!

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LINIS_THIN 6/12/2010 11:07PM

    You know I feel you!!!

The D*** house can't leave you alone!!!

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    lol! Don't forget to blog about his reaction :)

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GIANTPANDA 6/12/2010 1:36PM

    Thanks for a great blog. I'm decluttering the kitchen before the World Cup playoffs today while my hubbie is out doing working on his favorite hobby until late tonight. I so agree about decluttering and the state of mind. My efforts really began to change with Peter Walsh's book, "Does This Clutter Make My Butt Look Fat?"

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LABYRINTH 6/12/2010 11:59AM

    I'm a history buff (area of interest is more Elizabethean and Renaissance), raised by a history buff (Civil War and WWI and II history), with three brothers, who each specialized in a war era - as well as planes, and brother D who is more into ancient Rome and Napoleonic eras. It's a thing I guess.

Son has a lot of historical collections in his room (which don't show up in the photo so well) - lots of Civil war books, items, as well as a Civil War Drum replica that he uses when doing reanctments with his dad. Replicas of old maps and coins from various eras - some pirate memorabilia (long story but I used to have a party business one of which had a pirate theme).

He also has some old cameras (not valuable) and seems to pick up old electronic equipment from the 50's (the bane of my parenting existence) and one of those pieces (an audio oscillator- whatever that is) is on the dresser.

When I started to decorate that just seemed to be the vibe - vintage 1940-50, more Thin Man era.

Officially, son said he didn't care and do what I wanted - but no cute bedspreads.... he comes home tomorrow and we shall see what he thinks emoticon

Comment edited on: 6/12/2010 12:13:25 PM

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BREWMASTERBILL 6/12/2010 11:13AM

    Very neat. Out of curiosity, what made you choose 1940's? Did the teenager have a say?

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PATTYKLAVER 6/12/2010 10:38AM

    It's great you're making improvements. Keep up the good work.

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home decorating has been keeping me busy

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Totally not a fitness update, but I have been busier then a one-armed wallpaper hanger these last two weeks.

Daughter left too grandparents for a week and we totally redid her room. If you are into decorating and home stuff, you can check out my other blog for photos of her completed project:

Son is off to Space Camp in Houston (is to be picked up on Sunday - when daughter leaves for one week of herpetology day camp at the science museum) and I've been re-doing his room while he is gone. I'll update with a link when it is done or just keep a look out on the Simply Rooms blog.

Completely nothing beind done on good eating or exercise. I'll post about why in a few days but for now I'm taking a break while thinking over what I need to do to get back on track while WANTING to get back on track and stay there...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ZESTYLADY 6/13/2010 6:00PM

    Man! You are seriously talented! I so need a re-do in my house! Just having one room completely finished would be a blessing.

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RWETHAIRYET 6/11/2010 9:21PM

    Wow! it looks great! The colors are wonderful!!

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    Nice job on the room! You did great and it looks fantastic. I am sure it was time consuming but well worth it. I have really been missing you on here! You need to come back and get back on track. I am down to 196.5 so I think I have broke the 200 pound barrier for good. I hope you do the same soon! Take care and talk to you again soon.

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TERRIJWALL224 6/11/2010 4:17PM

    I checked out the other pics, wow it really looks great! Wanna come decorate my house???
Miss you Becky~ Hope you hop back in soon!

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MIZZ_D 6/11/2010 3:29PM

    The room is just beautiful Becky!
I especially love the yellow kitchen cart sidetable in the room. What a find!


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SWEETLEXIE520 6/11/2010 2:37PM

    Just checked out the other pics - and WOW! Really nice job.

I think my favorite part is the dresser. Hubby and I have to redo our room and Little Man's room, and this gave me some great ideas.

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SWEETLEXIE520 6/11/2010 2:31PM

    Definitely love it! You're doing a great job - and it's good you're recognizing that you can't do it all at once!

I'll definitely check out your blog to see more of the pics!

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LABYRINTH 6/11/2010 2:25PM

    Daughter is picking out yellow accessories... there is already some on her desk...

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IFDEEVARUNS2 6/11/2010 8:41AM

    Awesome job! I especially love the dresser.

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SURLYGIRL 6/11/2010 8:23AM

    Love the room. The headboard, bedding, chest of drawers are fantastic. I like the funky little yellow night table. It's a real personality piece, but I agree that there should be yellow elsewhere in the room to tie it in. (Not trying to be critical - I'm just addicted to HGTV - LOL)

Good to see you again - looking forward to seeing the next room.

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SLIMMINJENN 6/10/2010 11:46PM

    The room is beautiful..Enjoy your break..

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FIT_ARTIST 6/10/2010 11:22PM

    Looks great! I love the splash of yello, but if you don't mind me saying so, I think there needs to be some MORE yellow. The same yellow, maybe on a throw pillow or a wall haging. Don't know if you were looking for a critique! lol! (I can't help myself; art college we critiqued EVERYTHING! lol!)

I LOVE brown & blue together. I just did my living room in chocolate and sky blue. Gonna add a little pale yellow; an African sort of theme.

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LINIS_THIN 6/10/2010 8:20PM

    Celebrate all you ARE accomplishing.
We'll work on the spark when you are ready.
Use my plan to NOT REGAIN!! That's all

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end of May update

Monday, May 31, 2010

I deliberately took the rest of May off from exercising and food tracking. That's been great! I have not gained or loss, but I did have the joy of having three TOM in 45 days so my body is back to it's bizarre schedule.

Anyway, tomorrow starts my new schedule, back to food tracking and back to late afternoon cardio (elliptical). In the a.m., I will be doing horse stuff due to the heat. I'll log in at Spark in the a.m. with the day's plans via the trackers, but mostly post to groups and friends in the p.m.

How involved I'll be with Spark remains to be seen. The summer is typically very busy with the kids out of school, as well as my busy involvement with the horses, both of which need a lot of work this summer. The reality is that I am not a big social network site person - I deleted my Facebook account and never had a MySpace account. I am mostly a lurker on my message boards that are non-Spark related.

Anyway, time to get back in the saddle - at Spark and with the horses so I'll be around more tomorrow after the holiday.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LDY_ALI_79 6/4/2010 9:21AM

    I'm glad you kept us up to date with your plans. Summer is always super busy for me too!

emoticon on maintaining your weight!

Take care~

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FORALLTOSEE 6/3/2010 12:28AM

    Good to hear from you.
You were so dedicated to your teams and friends I'd never have believed you are not into social networking....

I might love it if not for my demanding life.

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    You are one busy lady! Great job at maintaining, that's the toughest part sometimes. Glad to hear from you, it's been awhile. Wishing you the best!

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    Way to go you! Your healthy habits are obviously ingraining themselves into your very being!!! Don't worry about not being about so much, we don't mind you lurking!!!!! No jumping out from behind bushes though!

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MIZZ_D 6/1/2010 11:32AM

    Nice to hear from you Becky!
Have a great summer!


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RWETHAIRYET 5/31/2010 9:03PM

    Great job with maintaining even while taking the break. It does seem to get extra busy this time of year, so good to figure out how to use the time to your best advantage...I know I'm in kind of the same boat with that.

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SURLYGIRL 5/31/2010 5:57PM

    Hi Becky - It's good to see you, I've missed you bunches! It's good that you were able to maintain your weight without tracking. Sometimes a break is just the thing to help us refocus.

Hope to see you around more, but you do whatever you need to do to make your life the best it can be.

emoticon - Carolanne

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Back to Square One - mind games

Friday, May 14, 2010

I am tired of this whole weight loss journey - tired and not motivated. Motivation continues to be my number one roadblock as I am seeing extremely slow progress.

Motivation is one of the hardest things to influence. It's not enough to say "just do it" - which may work for the short term, getting a workout done, but doesn't continue long term commitment.

#1 problem for me is Food. I am pretty consistent on my workouts and even if I get sidetracked for a week by my TOM, get back on track pretty quickly. Eating is definitely linked to the unconscious - though I have developed strategies to help me, sometimes the mind can be pretty determined to get her way!

In the past, I've used subliminal tapes to help me and they were a core component of my plan, especially a self-hypnosis tape I have. However, they are cassettes and I really want something on CD as it would be far more convenient for me. The easier something is, the more likely I am to use and do it. I don't like things that are complicated.

I went ahead and ordered Motivational Weight Loss

and Freedom from Junk Food

How do these work? Well there's a lot of info on the site (which I have ordered from this company before) so I won't go into the "science" but I will write briefly about my experiences with them...

It's best to listen to them everyday for 30 days. For best results stick to every day listening - which can be done while you do the dishes, cook dinner, take a bath, etc... They can be disturbing to your sleep if listened to while falling asleep, though I have done it that way - it depends on how sensitive you are to the voices (most of the time you cannot hear the voices, but sometimes you catch a murmur).

In about two weeks you will start making small changes that on the surface you don't connect to the tapes. Such as choosing a water bottle over a soda... or picking up a fruit instead of a candybar. You start finding it easier to resist making bad choices such as picking up candy at the checkout or resisting that dessert on the menu. The changes are small and you are not changed into a different person with no control over your mind.

Overall, it just makes doing the right thing so much easier... if you find it always a struggle, getting frustrated or impatient, it eases you.

There are a bunch of different methods you can choose from - completely subliminal means you will not hear the voices (though they give you a list of what is on the tape) and will hear nature sounds or music.They can be used while you are reading, doing chores, knitting, etc....

Some of the others you do hear the voices, such as with Echo-Tech so these need to be used with headphones and not while your attention is needed elsewhere. I've found a combination of subliminal with Echo-Talk (or something similar) works more effectively then just subliminal.

Yes, these are expensive. No way around it. But if you compare the cost to one counseling session (well over $100), or 3 workouts with a personal trainer ($150 at my gym and usualy more), or one piece of workout equipment I want (Bosu $100), then it is a bit easier to swallow (just a bit).

There are also other companies to order from. I Ilst and link this company because I have used their products before...

I do have a series on cassette tapes which I'll be replacing with CDs. if you are already my Sparkfriend and would like to be considered, email me your request. Available titles:

*Excellent Posture (subliminal)

*Relaxation (subliminal - comes in original case with list of messages)

*End Self Destructive Patters (headphones ONLY, Echo-Tech, in original case with messages)

*Enjoying Exercise (subliminal with tropical soundtrack, comes in original case)

*Natural Pain Relieve (same as above - I used this to prepare for natural childbirth)

*Soaring Self Esteem (2 cassette set, in original case, with coaching on one, and Innertalk on the other - will need headphones).

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LINIS_THIN 5/15/2010 12:38AM

    my concern (read FEAR) with subliminals is that people are trying to control me... The thing is it is probably safer to listen to subliminals you KNOW are subliminals than regular music that is secretly subliminal.

I hardly listen to music these days for this same reason. I found it became easier to live righteously after dumping love songs and the like.

I'd love to hear "End Self Destructive Patterns" however...

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LABYRINTH 5/14/2010 11:51AM

    Health issues are continuing to make this trip on the merry-go-round harder and more difficult. It will be slower then the first time around and I have come to the conclusion will need to be approached differently.

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MRPLATSON 5/14/2010 11:39AM

    My son just learned that a square peg goes into a square hole and a round peg into a round hole... it's the kind of thing that reminds me that what works for me doesn't always work for others.

We're all here for you in your journey, do what you gotta do to get it done!

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DEESJOURNEY2FIT 5/14/2010 11:33AM

    I've been looking into these, glad to hear they really do work! Thanks for sharing the information with us!

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quick update

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

School is ending for the kiddos so my son has already gone on FOUR fieldtrips! He did get to hold a baby kangeroo and pet a bear cub... and I've gone to my daughers' music program, and my son's music program is tomorrow. Son also wants another "game night" where we invite about15 of his friends over for a night of video games. And I start back to college in two weeks.

May is always busy with these type of things which makes me almost wish that school IS out due to all the stuff that needs to get done. LOL

The tornados all went south of us on Monday and nothing showed up around here yesterday though it was predicted we would see some bad weather, and it has been gloomy, raining and mucky (kinda warm and heavy wtih humidity).

The pain of my TOM is just now starting to ease so I'm mapping out a program and re-thinking what I'm going to be doing so will update about that later.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LINIS_THIN 5/15/2010 12:30AM


I added back some cardio and am pleased with the results so far.
building back fitness is always more energy consuming than maintaining fitness.

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RWETHAIRYET 5/12/2010 8:42PM

    I always felt just like that for the last month or so of school for the kids...there was just so much to do and so many directions to go, we'd all run ourselves ragged.
Glad the tornadoes passed you.

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AKA639 5/12/2010 4:46PM

    Excellent! Sounds like your super busy!
How cool that your son got to hold a kangaroo! They're so cute!

I didn't know you were going to school soon, congrats!

Keep up the great work! Keep on keeping on...
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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DEESJOURNEY2FIT 5/12/2010 12:06PM

    Glad to hear the tornados passed you up. Hopefully things will calm down for you soon! I feel like I run constantly trying to get things done, it makes you wish for just 10 minutes to yourself with nothing to do!

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7777BEV 5/12/2010 9:06AM

    Sounds like your kids keep you hopping! Good stuff but so busy - I was just thinking earlier that my son has one more month before school is out - it sure did go by fast. Hope you don't get worn out! =)

So glad you didn't get that bad weather! We also have had rainy and gloomy weather - when will the nice warm weather finally arrive??! Can't wait for that.

Glad you're feeling better - hope you get everything done you want to accomplish! Have a great Wednesday!

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