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Monday blues or something more?

Monday, September 16, 2013

As I sat at my desk this morning I could feel the fatigue move over me like a storm cloud on a soon to be rainy day. It became heavy and troublesome. Motionless and powerless to what was happening I began to reflect ...

My weekend was calm and relaxed. I did what I wanted ... when I wanted. There was minimal stress and I slept. The fatigue has become apart of my life again and the dark cloud follows me everywhere I go.

Today a moment of clarity came and I remembered this storm cloud from years ago. I frantically scanned my brain and recalled all those moments of tired desperation and tears as I lived for years with constant fatigue that was crippling in the end. Just as a flash of lightening lights up the sky my brain flickered as I remembered it all ... MY ADRENALS!!

I've been off my adrenal support program of a good while ... you know because I "felt better." (FACE/PALM) Yup, I felt better for almost a year and now suddenly - okay, not so suddenly - they are crashing again.

I called Doc's office to review my chart and to review my symptoms. It would appear my "I feel better" moments have been depleted and I shall return to my adrenal program.

Admittedly, even though I've been working out and doing okay I've let my wellness program become a bit flat. I need to put myself first and move in a different direction. I started that today because it was the right thing to do not because it's a Monday.

... Now I'm off to the gym to sweat a bit ...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TRENTDREAMER 9/18/2013 5:24PM

    Hope that you feel better soon!

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MANLEYSANDY 9/17/2013 11:27AM

    You have a lot going on in your life right now. Putting yourself first is the most important thing you can do right.

Hang in there!!


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JENJESS48 9/17/2013 8:37AM

    Good job recognizing the symptoms and stopping the problem before it got too advanced! Hope you feel better soon!

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ITSHOWYOULIVE 9/16/2013 6:24PM

    Glad you were able to know to process the things going on and put the pieces together. Glad you are in contact with your doctor and getting back on the program. Hope the gym went well and that Monday turned into a good day :).

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... Request for Information ...

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Hey everyone ...

I have two requests:

First ...

I was told that my basal metabolic burn rate is 1469 and that I should eat less than 1469 calories in a day to burn fat. What I am wonder is this ... if I workout - ST or Cardio - in a day (let's say 30 minute sessions) should I not consume a few more calories? If yes, how much more?

Second ...

I'm looking for a tasty low carb, low sugar, low filler, great tasting high protein powder mix that I can add to a spinach/cucumber/fruit smoothy. Any success stories out there when it comes to high protein powder mixes.

Thanks in advance for any feedback you can and are willing to share.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ENDUROVET 9/16/2013 4:36PM

    These days I am falling more & more into the "eat when you're hungry, JERF (Just Eat Real Food)" and I've been "maintaining" for these past 2 mos which is a hell of a lot better than roller-coastering up & down!

I like the Vitamin Shoppe store brand 100% Whey Pro-Amino powder - look for the little weightlifter on the jar... I think it's the best value for the $$$

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TRENTDREAMER 9/14/2013 10:31AM

    Not really sure on the first.

Unfortunately no real success stories on the second.

Hope that you are doing well!

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TRYSCHE13 9/13/2013 9:05AM

    Hi, I found a website simplegreensmoothies.com, they have a lot of good ideas, I use either EAS carb control, Muscle Milk light or Pure protein, right now I am looking for a non flavored one. I'm glad to see you are doing better!

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HOLLYS_NEW_LIFE 9/10/2013 2:14PM

    I use Genisoy Protein powder. I'm not sure if it's "high" in protein, but I like it! It's 12grms of protein for 30grms of powder. I've totally given up on the calories in vs calories out thing. Supposedly, if you workout, you should be able to eat more, and in some instances, you NEED to eat more, but no matter what I do, nothing seems to go my way, lol! Best of luck on that one!

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Breathing again ...

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

I caved and allowed my best friend to take me out of town this past weekend and can now say it was a blessing. We headed up the coast for a little girl time aka KT needs to get away and talk about "something." I fold within myself and become silent when things in my own world go sideways. My girl had become concerned when this time around seemed to have me in the darkest of places with no hope of return.

We walked on the beach.
Danced in our hotel room.
Ate like we didn't have a care in the world.
Drank wine and bubbly at the wineries.
Laughed until we cried.
We sat in comfortable silence.
We talked like we hadn't seen each other in 20 yrs.

She cried when I told her my story, my troubles, my everything.
I simply started breathing again.

Back to the real world yesterday I discovered my endless hunger had disappeared. Confiding in ones I trust allows me not only to breathe but to put down the food. My situation hasn't changed but now I'm no longer in the darkness and alone.

I'm continuing my efforts at my new gym and have loved every minute there. I escape for an hour for me time ... fun time.

Blessing to you all ...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

1DERLAND14 9/3/2013 6:42PM

    Your weekend away sounds like pure bliss :) I am glad you were able to enjoy that and find comfort in your friend and the simple things in life. I know I have been a consistent sparker and know everything that's going on with you, but I hope and pray that you have peace in your situation soon. I know you are a strong and capable woman...you are a fighter and I have faith that you will make it through whatever comes your way! emoticon

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TRENTDREAMER 8/27/2013 7:36PM

    "I caved and allowed my best friend to take me out of town this past weekend and can now say it was a blessing."
* :)

" My girl had become concerned when this time around seemed to have me in the darkest of places with no hope of return. "
* I've "kidnapped" and been "kidnapped by" a few friends (especially in college)

"She cried when I told her my story, my troubles, my everything.
I simply started breathing again. "
* Know the feeling

"Confiding in ones I trust allows me not only to breathe but to put down the food. "
* emoticon

"Blessing to you all ... "
* To you as well

I'm thankful to your friend for what she did for you.

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EG8383 8/27/2013 4:12PM

  SO GOOD to read that you let yourself be removed from your troubles and you feel so much better now that you're back in your world. When you're dealing with a lot as you are it's so easy to just push people away because you're not up to chit chat and entertaining but there is always that one person whom you can just be YOU with. The experience you had with your girl sounds AMAZING. I totally wish I was able to get away like that and refocus and clear my mind. We are never in darkness alone ... we just choose to be ... we have to allow them in so we can find our way again. May your situation change in due time. Glad you've found some peace and ready to keep fighting. HUGS!!

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    A wonderful weekend

Make Today the Greatest Day of Your Life

emoticon Until Tomorrow!

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A different path

Thursday, August 15, 2013

I still have that new gym glow happening, LOL! I don't care if I'm busy or tired ... I go! In the locker room I'm not shoving myself in a corner trying not to be seen either. I have found my people and my new favorite gym. Oh ya, can't forget to mention my love/hate relationship with that Arc Trainer. WOW! I'm working my way up from 30-minutes to 45-minutes ... it's tough at a 6 incline and 30 resistance. With this has come a new outlook and a more positive spin on things which helps me find the logic in the madness.

My shoulder is slowly getting better. I've not had a shoulder injury before ... they are no joke! Three+ weeks later I'm still favoring it.

Although my weight hasn't really changed I am not seeing the drastic changes from day to day. I believe this is progress. Also, I'm firming/toning it all up. Many of my clothes are too big now so I can see the change.

This week I've had a bit more anxiety than usual and my sleep quality is tanking too. Anxiety is a trigger for me to binge as is being exhausted. I find myself, as I call it, "circling." First comes the anxiety/exhaustion, next comes the circling/hunt, then comes the binge. I'm trying to interrupt the pattern this time but it's not easy. *FINGERS CROSSED*

It would seem I'm on a different path now.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

1DERLAND14 9/3/2013 6:45PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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ENDUROVET 8/15/2013 4:39PM

    I use the "Strength Intervals" program on the Arc trainer which works purty good for me!

But I have to admit there's a lot to explore w/Daily Burn video classes on demand at the new branch...

My recent (increased) stress levels haven't triggered a binge; just more low-level mindless munching... Trying to rein it in before I cross over that Heavyweight threshold again.

emoticon emoticon

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NKING1982 8/15/2013 12:34PM

    Sounds like you are doing great, keep up the good work and keep pushing

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The Shifting

Wednesday, August 07, 2013

As I continue to blog and search within the shift has started.

This morning I woke up to this message:

I scrambled out of bed and packed my gym bag! I'm not waiting ... one more day to signup at the new gym. I'm giving myself an early birthday present TODAY. I have a call in to setup a trainer appointment too. I want to learn the ST training circuit as quickly as possible.

This won't fix everything but it sure as heck will make me feel better. I'm looking forward to getting my sweat on again.

Giggles are sure to follow ...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

1DERLAND14 9/3/2013 6:46PM

    GOOD FOR YOU! That is the attitude of a person who has a vision and is going after it! emoticon

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ENDUROVET 8/10/2013 9:16AM

    Amen sistah! (can't post emoticons on my friend's computer but I'd be throwing out "Hugs!" "Way to Go!" "We Can Do It!"

(I LOVE the Arc Trainer at my gym - I can be dripping sweat in 15 min)

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TRENTDREAMER 8/9/2013 5:07PM

    "This won't fix everything but it sure as heck will make me feel better. I'm looking forward to getting my sweat on again. "
* :D

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BLISS_OM 8/9/2013 2:01AM

    SUPER AWESOME!!! YOU GO GIRL!!! YOU CAN & WILL SUCCEEED!!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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