Thursday, July 14, 2011
My latest urine tests results are in. Iím clean. HA! Just joking. Doc has had me take tests after starting me on a new supplement program and today I got back results from the 3rd test. My serotonin and dopamine levels have regulated and stabilized. The lab suggested more severe tweaks with the supplements and then to test again in a week. Doc was not impressed with that recommendation and advised against further urine tests. YES! The tests and supplements arenít cheap so I was happy to be done with the tests.
We are going to tweak the supplement intake ever so slightly though. Iím in tune with my body enough that I can tell when things work and donít work within a matter of days so we are going to rely on my body vs. science.
Things to watch for:
I used to sleep 10 - 12 hours a day and then cry in the afternoons due to the fatigue being so bad. I now sleep 8 hours a day and can fully function throughout the day without the aid of a nap, caffeine or other wake me ups.
Even though I was sleeping up to 10 - 12 hours a day I would wake up at the drop of hat or if I heard an ant walk across the carpet. Interrupted sleeps sucks. I now sleep soundly and rarely wake up unless the little fur ball needs something or I have to pee.
Although I could stay within my calorie range daily, it proved difficult. My body was always craving something. Sure part of that was a sugar, soda and carb addiction but mostly it was my inner bits and brain chemistry being messed up. Iíve cut soda out, sugars are less and less daily and I try not to carb load - my body loves its protein. Between a diet adjustment and the supplements my appetite has diminished. Often I have to remind myself to eat or if Iím having a ďcraving,Ē I sit all quietly within myself to ask, ďare you mentally hungry or physically hungry?Ē A lot of times itís mental and Iím training myself to leave it alone when mental hunger comes along.
Doc recommends a 2 to 4 pound loss a month. Yes, you read that right - 2 to 4 pound loss a month. Any faster than that and the body can turn on ya. Iíd like to be at the 4-pound weight loss for the month. My weight stalled out in 2007 and Iíve been in hovering in the 230/240's since then. It sucks! That being said - Iíve seen the dark side of 325 too.
If any of these things change, Iíll know that our tweaks took me in the wrong direction and we adjust again.
My boss knows most of whatís going on and has been around long enough to see me at 325 and now at 234. Heís witnessed the tears of desperation when my fatigue was so bad I just wanted to go to sleep and never wake up. Heís witnessed the tears of desperation when my weight loss stalled and I had no idea why. Heís witnessed the good. The bad. The ugly. When I need support, heís there and when I need tough love heís there. Today I told him I was finish with testing. He asked what that meant so I explained. He then asked what was my goal weight. I smiled and said I have about 68.5 pounds to go. At which point a perplexing look came over his face because he couldnít imagine me going down that much more. I smiled. As he tilted his head ever so slightly he asked, ďwhat do you weigh today?Ē *INTERNAL GASP* I smiled and proudly said, 234. Yeah, Iím all about full disclosure when Iím with people who support me. He stood silently for a moment and then told me he never would have guessed I weighed that amount, he would have thought much less.
In other news . . .
I have decided I will attend the kick boxing / boxing class at the gym. The Mr and I talked about it. I emailed my friend Yvonne who responded to answer all my open-ended questions. I already know class is going to be tough. Tougher than running. Tougher than Step and Zumba. I do love a challenge.
Hereís my reply to Yvonne today - ďYup, class looks overwhelming and scary. Yet, I like a challenge and I hate being strangled by fear. That being said Ö Iím in!Ē
Yeah, thatís right Iím in - all in!
Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Last night I spoke to a guy named Joe at my gym. I initially thought he was the boxing instructor, he is not. I learned he is a boxer and is willing to meet with me on Saturday morning 30 minutes prior to Zumba class to go over the basics. I agreed.
When I came to work today I received an email from a woman I'm friendly with at the gym about boxing. She had overheard my conversation with Joe and asked if she could persuade me to attend the gyms boxing class with her on Monday & Wednesday evenings from 8:05 till 9:30.
The universe was clearly eavesdropping last night. *GIGGLES*
It has taken me 7 hours to reply to Yvonne's e-mail. The fear of the unknown really took hold of me and was suffocating. I was full of questions. Anxiety. Fear. Excitement. I even came up with many excuses to say, thank you but no to Yvonne. In the end, I reply with a reserved yes. Yes, I'll give it a try. *DEEP BREATH*
Sure, I'll be the new kid on the block tomorrow night and I can handle that. I can handle the challenge of the workout too. My challenge will be to not let the fear win. The fear of the unknown. The fear of being in a class that is dominated by men. The fear of being in a class with women who are rock hard. The fear of doing it wrong. The fear of sucking wind or falling down. Ya, it's all there and I'm carrying it around with me today. It's heavy baggage, that exhausts me so I'm putting it down now and moving forward. YES, I will attend the class!
IF I can concur this fear my whole workout schedule will change again. I'm okay with that.
WHEN I can concur this fear I will dominate!
UPDATE SINCE POSTING: The boxing/kick boxing class has been cancelled for tomorrow night. Looks like I'll be starting on Monday, if all goes well.
Monday, July 11, 2011
I am officially passed the sore butt stage of riding my bike.
I giggle A LOT when I workout and I like it!
My legs are much stronger than last year.
Right now, running does not bring me joy. I took it up because someone I love told me I was too fat to do it.
I love Zumba and have unleashed my dancing diva.
I miss soda but not what it does to my inner bits.
I crave and seek out outdoor adventures ...
First, The Water Park
Then, a return to the rapids - Whitewater rafting!
My calorie bank was overdrawn this weekend - I choose that. Today, I get a new start and a new balance.
ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!
Friday, July 08, 2011
Today, July 8th, marks two years that the Mr has lived in the states. We decided to celebrate this occasion by going to a water park for an entire day and just play like kids.
I decided a few days ago that I just couldn't go to a water park in my "going to the pool" bathing suit. I HAD to have board shorts. Okay, not really but we toured Sears and Target to take a look see. At Sears I found the board shorts, as did the Mr, and they were on sale. We had a gift card so they cost us nothing! Then we headed to Target where I found the tankini top that match perfectly. I was a happy woman at the water park in my put together water wear.
I also stopped and bought new sunscreen because I did NOT want another burn, thank you very much. The Mr sprayed me down so well throughout the day that the sun did not stand a chance this time around.
The day begins ...
Armed with new sunblock and the Mr applying it often I was all shinning but never burnt.
Lunch wasn't an issue for my healthy eating lifestyle either. Amongst the junk food options I found a fresh green salad with chicken and as always ate it without the dressing. My biggest concern was caving in and having a soda but I opted for a lemonade and then water for the balance of the day. It was all good!
We giggled as we took turns on this one.
This was right before I went down a slight water fall backwards. *GIGGLES*
The Mr was all smiles on this one too.
I love these photos!
The wave pool ... one of my favorite locations of the day.
We took a short break to relax in the shade and cool off with some water and ice cream. Delicious!
Look Ma, 5.5 hours in the sun at a water park, no burn!
It's fun acting like a kid and having no worries for a few hours. Live Life!
Saturday, July 02, 2011
It seems the universe and my body did not get the memo that I wanted, wished, predicted, and/or demanded that I weigh 229.5 today. Instead, I weigh 232. If you think I'm disappointed in that think again. I did a little wiggle, smiled at myself and walked on. You see, I went shopping last night for nothing special and found, in the dressing room, something priceless! Size 16 jean shorts that fit like a glove. I was in heaven as I strutted my stuff around the store. Ya, my butt looked good! The sun dress in size 14 equally flattered my curves. I didn't walk out of that store, I floated out on cloud number 9.
I may not weigh 229.5 today but I'm found my bliss anyway.
Note to universe and body: 229.5 will be mine next Saturday! Yes, it will happen, without fail.
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