Tuesday, August 24, 2010
The Bay Area has lost its fog for the last few days and the place is horribly hot and sticky. I don't enjoy the heat unless I'm sitting pool side or on a beach by the sea in my swimsuit. We don't "do" air conditioning in my little corner of the world, that's what the fog is for.
My office is not air conditioned and its hot with a hot breeze blowing through.
My apartment is not air conditioned and does not have a breeze at all.
My gym is not air conditioned and equally does not have a breeze.
My level of energy is at 10% - I'm miserable. I thought, at first, my energy was low due to the heat but in fact it is not. I feel the way I used to feel before I started working with Doc. The fatigue I feel goes to the bone and weighs heavy on my soul. My eyes feel like ten pounds of sand are pulling them down and my brain is fried. I went to sleep tired and I woke up after 8.5 hours tired. It's not normal. No one should experience this type of fatigue. To think, before I found Doc, this is how I lived my life for over a year. It's a wonder something bad didn't happen ...
The end of my work day is approaching, like a snail on a hot roadway, and I'll try to hang on. The boss is has been told of the problem, this is not something to hide or pretend away. I could break at any minute and the man does not "do" tears well.
The Mr. wants to go on a bike ride later tonight but that's on hold until I get home and see what shape I'm in. I can't go to step class, I've tried in the past when I'm like this and it does not go well. I do have plans to swim or should I say jump in a pool! That should help and it will be a good workout but I should disclose now - it won't be an over the top workout.
It's days like this that I remember what was but in all honesty I'd rather read an old blog post instead of physically experiencing it again.
If you know someone with a fatigue problem, it might go deeper than getting a good nights sleep.
Monday, August 23, 2010
I learned many years ago that self care is an important part of life and finding happiness. After allowing myself to put myself first I bought into that way of thinking. Then I lost sight of it after I got married. It's taken me about a year to figure out that self care IS still important.
My self care doesn't have a dollar amount attached to it and I often enjoy the little things in life over something grand. That being said, I also enjoy a good massage. I finally figured out how I can afford a monthly 60 minute massage and on occasion a 90 minute one. At first I felt guilty for taking the time and then for using that money - I'm over that guilt. LOL!
Sunday I received a 90 minute massage and then had a peaceful lunch wherein I ate my favorite salad. The massage was wonderful. My massage therapist knows her stuff and always finds those problem spots. My biggest problem area, at the moment, is my left thigh and then right behind it is the right one. I need to get those stretched out better.
Self care has allowed me to discover myself and open the dark rooms inside my brain. I'm a better person and wife when I allow for that me time. On Wednesday, I'm taking some additional "me" time. My batteries are low again and I need to reconnect with myself.
Sometimes on this journey to wellness I forget or shun living life. I get so set in my ways that I get in my own way. I don't want to stop exploring life, food, adventure and limits.
With Mr. being Jamaican I am exploring authentic Jamaican foods - the "country" food of Jamaica. It's not your typical "jerk" food. I often talk to his Auntie in Jamaica about different dishes and we trade recipes - sometimes with the help of Mr. (I still learning Patwa). I love to sample it and I love to cook it (not just Jamaican but any cuisine). I finally got Mr. to a small Jamaican place not far from home on Sunday. He was excited, over the top excited. I sampled it all ... it was fabulous, they got it right.
I don't want to stop sampling life!
I want to live life and explore it all.
My journey to wellness means exploring the physical and mental.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Well it was confirmed today, A.M. workouts just don't work for me but that's not really why I got mad.
After sleeping for 9 hours, a blessing, I had a glass of water, washed the sleep out of my eyes, ate a banana and walked to the gym. (It was foggy and cold) I wanted to get a good workout in before heading off to my Saturday job. It's rare that I workout on Saturday if I have to work but I was determined.
I decided to give my W8D1 of C25K a try ... TOUGH! That added three minutes might as well been three hours. I accomplished a 15 minute mile! That made me happy. I got mad due to watching the clock and feeling like time was standing still. Plus, I just want it to be easier. A lot of nasty/dirty words went through my mind today and I finally had to tell myself to shut up! Shut up and do it. I had to remind myself over and over why I was really doing this. Finally at the 5 minute mark my mind went blank. I jogged and at 3 minutes I finally increased the speed. I keep hoping conditioning will ease my discomfort and make things easier!
I can report that my breathing is easier while I run and today my outer upper thigh muscle was not screaming during or after the jog. An improvement!
So, I started off this blog saying that A.M. workouts just don't work for me. It's true! I generally workout in the afternoon or early evening and I feel great during and after. When I workout in the mornings I am left feeling fatigued and drained of all energy. Even my boss noticed the change in my energy. He confessed that he can't workout in the A.M. either. I found it interesting and will continue to listen to my body ...
I ended up taking a nap after work, which I loved. I ate within my calorie range too. A successful Saturday!
Thursday, August 19, 2010
I didn't make it to the gym last night but all was not lost, I hiked around town. I sat at my desk all day yesterday dreaming of the sun's warmth on my shoulders and a cool breeze blowing my hair. When I left the office to walk to the gym I just kept walking. It was beautiful out and I didn't want to be in a stuffy old gym running on the wheel aka treadmill/elliptical. When I finally reached home I mapped it out with the help of SP and found I had walked 3 miles. I wasn't sweaty like when I leave the gym but I felt refreshed and like I had a good workout nonetheless.
Today, step class calls my name.
Ahem, I'm tired of my thighs rubbing together whilst I walk, jog, etc. I'm over it. It needs to change and it will.
Ummmm, I'm tired of buying pretty high heel shoes that expire after a few hours due to the ball of my foot feeling like it's on Fire.
My latest find, the second cutest so far this season can only be worn outside the office for short walks.
I went to The City and walked in them for 3 hours one day and was nearly crippled when we got home. The Mr. was not happy, I was just in foot pain.
I asked my shoe guy (yeah, I have a shoe guy) what the problem is and he confirmed that it's due to my weight and the heel height. Hmmph! I don't want to be restricted to flats or low heels because of my weight. I want to continue to wear my sexy heels and not have them expire and my feet catch on fire!
Have toned, thick thighs that show my muscles when I walk/jog.
Enjoy high heels without the balls of my feet being on fire and being bruised from all the weight baring down on them.
I will continue to workout religiously, stay accountable with my calories and follow Doc's plan. With that combination I will make it happen. When, is the question!
Get An Email Alert Each Time KT-NICHOLS-13 Posts