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Week 1 calorie deficit (January 3-9) = - 420 kcal

Monday, January 03, 2011

This is my model that i love using for my calorie deficit and water intake tracking.
Those of you who are interested in this type of tracking can calculate their BMRs here:


January ,
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + =
Calories Consumed =
Cups H2O =
Calorie Deficit =

I didn't track my food intake on January the first because...come on...the day after the big night...i was extremely tired, i didn't sleep much, we had friends over, etc etc. But january 2nd, here i come!

January 2, Sunday
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + 0 = 1740
Calories Consumed = 1205
Cups H2O = 6 (need to drink more! but even 6 cups is an advancement from how much i drank before...)
Calorie Deficit = -535
(I didn't think it was gonna be this easy...i praise myself for choosing the right types of foods because i wasn't hungry at all, not for one second. So now that hunger isn't an issue anymore i only have to control my cravings for bad foods like my sweetie's sweets, etc)

January 3, Monday
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + 560 = 2300 (i did one hour of pretty intensive the instructor girl, she's so motivating)
Calories Consumed = 1600
Cups H2O = 8 (i was finally able to drink a whole 8 cups because of the aerobics made me wanna drink every 2 minutes, so i got a total of 8 cups today...yaaay!!)
Calorie Deficit = -700

January 4, Tuesday
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 +560 = 2300
Calories Consumed = 2245
Cups H2O = 8
Calorie Deficit = -65

January 5, Wednesday
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + 0 = 1740
Calories Consumed = 1330
Cups H2O = 3
Calorie Deficit = -410

January 6, Thursday
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + 0 = 1740
Calories Consumed = 2770
Cups H2O = 4
Calorie Deficit = + 1030

January 7, Friday
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + 0 = 1740
Calories Consumed = 2000
Cups H2O = 4
Calorie Deficit = + 260

January 8 , Saturday
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + 0 = 1740
Calories Consumed = 1740
Cups H2O = 4
Calorie Deficit = 0

January 9, Sunday
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + 0 = 1740
Calories Consumed = 1740
Cups H2O = 4
Calorie Deficit = 0


I'm down 1 kg (2.2 lbs) :)

Saturday, December 18, 2010

So I'm down 1 kg! :) I'm glad about it of course but I'm also surprised because in the past few days I overate. It was mostly because of stress. I have this thing that when I'm stressed eating a bigger amount of food (foods like pizza, pasta, meats, etc) calms me....BUT now that I have an extra weight of 50 lbs (only 48 now :D) it actually worsens my mood because I get more stressed 'cause I sabotaged my weight loss. So it's a vicious circle.
What I did well in the past few days was not eating in the hours previous to going to bed, tracking my food and working out. Okay that is progress too, I gotta admit, I'm not a failure. :) But all in all, I think not all the pounds will come off this "easily", only these first pounds, like these two but probably not more. I did lose weight before and nope, weight loss didn't happen while I was overeating so I'm not planning to do it like this because 'it worked once'. :)

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GOANNA2 12/19/2010 6:12AM

    emoticon emoticon

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NICKI984 12/18/2010 2:59AM

    congrats...keep it up

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Thursday, December 16, 2010

So i had 3 bad days in a row... i got back to almost NO kcal deficit for this month and of course it makes me angry and kinda like to wanna cry. Stupid food. Stupid me. No i know i can't say this. I'm smart and able to make this...but I sooo wanna see a smaller number on the scale. I've never been this heavy IN MY LIFE. EVER!!! I wanna feel that i accomplished something. Losing the first pounds should be easy. I HATE that i think too much of food. I feel a little obsessed about it. I start feeling hunger and i don't even consider waiting a tiny little bit before i, i have to eat - right away, i need my food that i love and hate so much in the same time. I'm not giving up. This is not the "my last post before disappearing for 5 months"-kind of blog post... this is the "i'm angry and i wanna give it out of myself but tomorrow i'll stand up and continue"-kind of post. This is not the type of anger that paralizes me and makes me give up...I'm NOT giving up.

The thing is, now that i look back at the past 6 days when i tracked my food intake i can see that the problem is with those 3 days when i'm on the road. I travel on monday, leave at around 8 in the morning and arrive back home in the afternoon at around 6-7. And i travel on wednesday-thursday, i leave on wed. morning and come back on the next day, thursday at around 4. I travel with my boyfriend, David. We sleep at a hotel, we eat breakfast there on thursday morning. Today morning (thursday) was the first time i noted down all the things that this breakfast contains and guess what? It's about 1300 kcal! Can you believe it? It's true that it keeps me not hungry from 10 in the morning (when we have breakfast) until about 4 in the afternoon, but still...i can't eat an 1300 kcal breakfast!! Of course my day is screwed food intake-wise with such a breakfast!!!!
The other problem on these roads besides the thursday morning breakfast is that we love eating together with my boyfriend, after long hours of driving (i drive, he's gonna take his exam to get his driver's license in a few weeks) it feels good.

I KNOW that i need to prepare for these roads: bring my own food, bring stuff that aren't packed with calories because i can eat more so they keep me full longer - and if i want to do it right to avoid slip-ups than i gotta pack for my boyfriend too, because we must stop to buy him something to eat if we don't bring him food, and if we stop i'm probably doomed. We created this habit that we go to mcdonald's on monday and kfc or pizza hut on thursday - but it's a horrible habit, i know!!!! :)
This is what i gotta do, this is what i WILL do!!!
Tomorrow afternoon when i come home from work i'm gonna cook something that i can easily cook for the roads, i'll enter the recipe to see how many calories it has, so i'll be able to track it from now on. It's semolina (or grits, wheatmeal - i don't know how to call it) with milk and not-sugar (sweetener). i'm curious how many calories a portion has, this food would be great for the road. There's also a version without milk, with water, maybe i'll try both tomorrow.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ALYSSAMICHELLE5 12/16/2010 7:05PM

    You can do this! You already know what to do in order to plan ahead. Now, just do it! You will feel so much better after you do it once, then twice, then three times until it is just habit. And, you'll feel so much better physically too! I have faith in you and know that you can do this!!!!!

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December calorie deficit

Monday, December 13, 2010


December , 2010
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + =
Calories Consumed =
Calorie Deficit =


I plan to have a daily deficit of 700 kcal when i go to aerobics class (this means i'll consume 1600 kcal) and a deficit of 540 when i don't (consuming 1200 kcal).

December 11, 2010 - Saturday
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + 560= 2300
Calories Consumed = 1825
Calorie Deficit = -475

December 12 , 2010 - Sunday
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + 0 = 1740
Calories Consumed = 1220
Calorie Deficit = - 520

December 13, 2010 - Monday
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 +0 = 1740
Calories Consumed = 3470
Calorie Deficit = +1730
[I worked from morning til 8 tonight...i missed mz aerobics class from 8, had to eat in the city and i didn't make smart food choices because i always got to the store hungry...and then i ate a little more when i got home. But I'm not disappointed or angry, i'm balanced and i will make up for this. I've got a whole year to lose this bad day doesn't make me fall]

December 14 , 2010 - Tuesday
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + 560= 2300
Calories Consumed = 1595
Calorie Deficit = -705

December 15, 2010 - Wednesday
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + 0 = 1740
Calories Consumed = 1410
Calorie Deficit = -330

December 16 , 2010 - Thursday
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + 560 = 2300
Calories Consumed = 2475
Calorie Deficit = +175

December 17 , 2010
BMR + Calories Burned = 1740 + 360 = 2100
Calories Consumed = 2400
Calorie Deficit = +300


This was my "introduction text"

Saturday, December 11, 2010

This was my "introduction text" on my Sparkpage at the beginning of 2010. I had big goals and i didn't work for them hard enough - i didn't reach them. I'll make 2011 different: less goals, one to be specific (ACHIEVE 126 LBS!), more work put in.

I'm Lilla, 23 years old. My journey with weight (loss) has been a long one, just like for the most of you guys. Ups and downs (literally), that feeling called 'I hate myself' and more.

I'm 5' 4'' tall, sometimes 5' 5'' actually, depends on who measures! :))

My highest weight was 77 kgs (170 lbs) in August 2009, I lost 6.5 kgs (14 lbs) so far so I weigh 70.5 now (155.5 lbs) in May 2010.

My goal is 58 kgs (128 lbs).
When I'll reach it I'll see if I need to lose more, I might try to reach 55 or 53 kgs (121 or 117 lbs), but only then will I be able to see what weight I look and feel good at.

I almost always had weight issues, even as a child. I have never been extremely obese, but I've always been heavier than I should've been. My weight was always fluctuating.

I lost a significant amount of weight 3 times so far in my life (somewhere around 15, 20 and 25 lbs).

The first one was when I was about 12 years old. Maybe because I was growing and my body was changing, or because I spent more time at the country eating lots of fruits and veggies, or maybe just because it was summer and my appetite wasn't too big, but I lost several pounds and I looked pretty okay. I didn't feel okay though, I couldn't see my body in an objective way, I always, no matter how thin and healthy I looked, I always felt at least a little - if not very - fat.

Anyway, it didn't last long, 4 year maybe, because I gained it all back - and more, due to emotional problems, which, by the way, have always been the source of my weight gains. I know that many of you have bigger issues than this, but I think my eating problems came from the divorce of my parents when I was 8 years old. I didn't really have a good relationship with my parents or sister, I could say that 'we were okay'...just okay.
So all of it - and more - was slowly gained back and it wasn't until the age of 19 that I seriously started losing weight. It was for a boy of course, needless to say he's not in the picture anymore for me, but I managed to lose weight thanks to trying to please him and I'm glad I did. I succeeded, went down to 58 kgs (128 lbs) and looking now back at the pictures (like the ones from 2007 on the left) I think I looked great! Of course back then I felt like I still had to lose weight, I felt that my belly and thighs and arms are too big, my cellulite ugly, my booty not so round and shaped as I'd like it to be. A part of it was true, I could've sculpted a much more perfect body with strenght training (which I did back then but stopped when I had to travel abroad for months), but although it wasn't that close to perfect it still looked very very good.

Well, it only lasted about a year and a half, because in the summer or 2007 I visited the US for 4 months as an exchange student, I worked a lot, one of my jobs was at Papa John's Pizza and I ate there all the time, had no idea (or didn't want to have any idea) how fattening that food really is, I didn't work out because I was working too much and I was tired, I didn't have a scale...etc etc etc. The thing is I could've avoided the weight gain, but somehow I took my weight for granted, I felt like now that I went down to 58 kgs (128 lbs) I'll stay there forever. That's not what happened. :) I went up to 66 kgs (145 lbs) by the end of the 4 months.

After coming back home I started working a lot (a lot meaning 17 hrs/day), it was stressful, hard and challenging. This horrible period lasted 2 years, until the end of 2009 and during these 2 years I gained more, I ended up at 77 kgs (170 lbs). It happened like this: after a year I decided to lose weight. I already weighed 75 kgs (165 lbs) then and I went down to 67 kgs (148 lbs). But then I started working even harder, I stopped exercising and watching food intake and in the summer of '09 I ended up at 77 kgs (170 lbs).

This is when my current journey started. To make a long story short: I ended that stressful work and that stressful relationship I had, I came out of depression, I'm with the love of my life now (I know this sounds stupid coming from a 23 year-old who's only been with the 'love of her life' for 6 months, but this relationship actually started 7 years ago so...I do feel it), I currently live in a different city, I don't work, I only go to school 2 times a week and I have realistic and nice plans for the future, both as for my weight loss and for other areas of my life.

So here are my goals:









By the end of 2010.

That's my goal - because at the beginning of 2011 my love and I will move back home to the city we were born and grew up in. We will join my father in his business, it's gonna be like a family business, and from then on my love and I will be able to seriously plan our future together. :)

So I want to be the healthiest me (both physically, mentally and spiritually) by the time we go back home and start a new life. I only want to focus on maintaing my weight and not losing beginning with next year.

I will surely work more than I do now (since I don't work at all right now :), I only go to school 2 times a week), but it's surely not gonna be a work as challenging and stressful as my previous one.

It will be a new life in which my love and I will be independent, we will live by ourselves, just the two of us (we live with his family right now which is great because they're cute, but of course living by ourselves is our dream).
A life we can live at home, in the city we grew up in.

A life that I can't wait to start together with him. :)

Also, I made myself a list of the rewards I'll give myself after each kg I lose. I weigh 73 kgs right now. When I'll weigh:

72: i'll buy an MP3-player! - REACHED, DONE! :)

71: i'll go to the zoo with my honey! - REACHED, DONE! :)

70: i'll go to a beauty studio and do a kind of treatment that kicks my fat stores' butt! :)


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BELLAALI 12/12/2010 7:36AM

    Go Lilla! I had a 10 pound goal plan all laid out and i think I want to stick to that so I am gonna look that up and see where I am at and get my rewards!!! WE CAN DO IT TOGETHER!!!

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