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You MUST Lose Weight for the RIGHT REASONS!

Friday, June 04, 2010

....if you want to lose it and KEEP IT OFF!

I just read a very sad story about a teenager's weight loss journey. But it's a lesson that teaches you that being thin is NOT what really makes you happy... Please read the short story below.


******Beginning of copy and paste*****
Weight story ++

In high school, one of my friend was the biggest girl of the whole school, topping at around 260lbs. She was a sweetheart and everyone knew and appreciated her, but she decided to lose weight thinking it would solve all her social problems (being affraid people were mocking her in her back, unable to find a boyfriend, etc.) In a matter of +/- a year and with a very strict proteins diet, she went down to her dream weight : 135lbs.

Well guess what : not only it didn't solve all her social problems (she was still super insecure) but she told me that at least, when she was fat everyone knew who she was and would recognize her in a crowd. Now she was just blending in like everyone else and she HATED it.

She eventually gained all her weight back and now feels *more like herself* this way. Bottom line : a number on a scale is not the answer to all our problems.
******End of copy and paste*****

So the person who originally posted this story on another site was right. I couldn't agree more. There are many possible reasons why we might lose and gain back the weight sometimes. I myself lost 30 last year and gained it back plus more over the summer and became my heaviest ever. But I bounced back and lost all that plus more and I'm closer than ever to my goal. And I'm not turning back because my mind is right. I look at it this way. Get healthy and you'll be happy. At least that's true for me! Being skinny is just a side effect. If you can't feel good inside first, then the outside can do nothing for you.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JOKNOWS 6/5/2010 1:35PM

    Great blog -- do it and lose it for the right reasons! emoticon

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RTB444 6/5/2010 9:54AM

    So true, I also feel like this is the first time I've attempted to lose weight for the "right" reasons and will be satisfied with myself in more ways than one when I reach my goal.

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RIPPEDPAUL1 6/5/2010 6:11AM

    IT's very true that weight may not be the cause of your troubles but the excuse. YOu do need to lose weight for the right reasons and keep aware of the change as it goes along. I have heard from many people losing 50 or more pounds that while they like the look in the mirror, they don't recognize the person and they don't feel the same in their body not because it's bad but unfamiliar.

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FITGRL124 6/4/2010 9:20PM

    emoticon blog! You share such insight sometimes that just coming to your page helps put things in perspective for me. emoticon

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ALIMESSA 6/4/2010 9:11PM

    You bring up a great point...this journey we are all on shouldn't be focused on losing weight, but on establishing healthy habits and living a healthy lifestyle. Weight loss is simply just a byproduct of that healthy lifestyle. Unfortunately, I think we all are guilty of sometimes bieng more focused on that number on the scale than we are on the healthy habits we are establishing. It's great to be reminded of why we are really here...thanks for the reminder!

As always,
Stay Strong!!

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2BLEAN_N_FIT_AZ 6/4/2010 5:07PM

    First congrats on your weight loss and the success you've achieved. I agree you should lose weight for the right reasons, and I also known that you have to find your own "aaa-ha" moment for those reasons so that the weight loss becomes permanent.



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FITNHAPPYNOW 6/4/2010 4:57PM

    Great story - thanks for the thought-provoking blog!!

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CHANDLER031 6/4/2010 2:26PM

  Hi, Doll, loved the post, but I can only think that when she lost the weight, she became healthy, this story is one of a kind, God bless the author, because this is a rarity in weight loss, as I have read these blogs over the years, I cannot ever remember someone losing weight and then regretting it, having been in the fitness ''WORLD'' for years, the only goal in weight loss is to become fit and healthy, far too many times, we want to lose 10,15,20 pounds for a class reunion, summer vacation, wedding...etc, whereas these are noble goals, the truth is, when these goals are met, we are still at a loss, we have not set out a long range plan for permanenet weight loss maintenance, therefore , we gain all of the weight back plus more, feeling more defeated than when we initially began, I would agree that losing weight is not the cure all that some of think that it is, if you have bad credit, phobias...etc, they are still gonna be there, but the beauty of weightloss is that you have proven that you are strong, that you have done the impossible, you were able to surpass what most of us can never, ever do, that you were able to discipline yourself, as for the young lady in this story, when she lost the weight, did she not realize that she added years to her life, that she lessened or eliminated the ills of cancer, hypertension, diabetes, depression, the list is too long to expound on at the moment, as for me, I would much rather be healthy than popular, and trust me IF YOU LOST OVER 120 LBS, YOU WILL NEVER BLEND IN, what planet is this story from, again, thanks for posting, and I am sure that you do not ''BLEND IN'' after losing your weight, RIGHT?????

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SUZEQ09 6/4/2010 2:18PM

    Truer words have never been spoken!

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Looking Younger (Happy Ending!) ... and I got One in my New Size!

Friday, June 04, 2010

I feel like I'm turning back time... Although I'm just under 29 years old, at one point I was beginning to doubt myself and think I couldn't be the healthy and physically fit woman I always wanted to be. By taking small steps and celebrating small victories, I've come a long way. I look younger than I did in high school!

I remember one depressing day when I was a sophomore in HS. I was coming from the cafeteria with my best friend who was tall and thin. There I was average height but early developed and top heavy, and overweight. In the 1990's they didn't have much to offer in teenage clothes for plus size girls. I was stuck wearing the kind of clothes my mom wore. So as we were about to walk upstairs back to class, the security guard stopped me and said, "Excuse me Ma'am. You need to sign in as a Visitor at the school office and get a pass!" Although he didn't know any better and was being polite, it REALLY ripped me apart! I was already depressed and hated myself. That just made it worse. I just looked confused and said, "I go here... See my bookbag??! " He saw me carrying a freakin' backpack and it didn't occur to him that I was a student? How old did I look??!!

Sooo fast forward to several years later, still overweight and "older looking"... being ignored by most guys my age and being approached by older men and me being annoyed and frustrated.... Those days are behind me. I look MUCH younger now that I've been improving my health and getting in shape. I have more energy now than I did way back then. I'm actually making it to my goal weight! As I've mentioned before on my blogs, I've never gotten this far before during my repeated attempts to lose the weight. THIS IS IT! I'M REALLY DOING IT!

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So about last night's mission to find a good bra in my new SMALLER size... I got a good one!!
It's by Bali. I've always loved theirs. I didn't have the time to go to a department store last night so I went to Ross which was closer to me and cheaper. They've had some good department store brands for me before so I figured I could find at least one to keep me until Saturday, when I'm going to find more at the mall. I'm more at ease today. Yesterday I had to do some adjusting all day long. It was such a pain trying to prevent any embarrassment... But I made it through. My new one is much more comfortable and is the right size. A bra that is 2 band sizes too big and 1 cup size too big hardly does anything support-wise... But now I can toss my old ones aside.

I want to do some closet purging so I can actually see how many fat clothes I have. I had never thought about fat undergarments but why didn't I think of it? LOL It had to take me falling out of my undergarments to realize it. Good thing it happened at home LOL.

I couldn't find any quality fancy stuff at Ross since they have a limited selection but I'm headed for VS this weekend!!! Semi-Annual Sale!!! (and it'll be fun cause I can finally fit more than just the 5 for $25 undies LOL) YAY!!!

I feel AWESOME!!!

Life is GOOOOD!

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MERALO 6/4/2010 9:09PM

    Give us a pic! Go on...you know you wanna...
emoticon

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ALIMESSA 6/4/2010 9:05PM

    You should feel AWESOME! I'm so happy for you...doing this lifestyle change NOW, instead of when you are in your 40's, like me! You are going to be so happy with yourself...you still have your whole life ahead you, and I can tell you are going to take it by storm!

And, as I replied on your previous blog, I really think you should go to Macy's...VS is nice and all, but Macys is better...I bought the Wacoal brand bras.

As always,
Stay Strong!!

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TIFFYDAWNMC 6/4/2010 11:03AM

    This is the second undergarment blog I've read today! Maybe I should take the hint! I've also been tossing aside bras left and right...only have 2 that really fit (and my friend promised to take me shopping, since she doesn't think I wear the right size!) and the VS sale is perfect timing! Thanks for the tip!

Keep up the great work! You'll be buying newer bras again before you know it!!!

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KML429 6/4/2010 11:00AM

    Thanks Quierston !! Yeah I remember that day in HS like it was yesterday. But it's long gone now...

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ELLIEMAE82 6/4/2010 10:55AM

    I am so happy for you!!! There is nothing better then moving down not only in pounds but size. It so rewarding when clothes you used to shimmy your way into begin to fall off. Way to go, good for you!

I can TOTALLY relate to your story about the security guard mistaking you for your friends mom. Same thing used to happen to me. When I was 16 I had four younger siblings; two sisters age 9 another 2 and a little brother age one. I used to HATE going out in public with them because people would always walk up to me and say, "you have such beautiful children." I would think, really?, you really think these kids are mine. Too embarrassed to correct them, I'd say thank you and keep it moving. My sisters used to think it was funny but they didn't get it, they didn't know better. But that's not your life anymore, YAY!!!

Keep up the good work, not only are you doing it but you're doing it big!

emoticon emoticon

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KML429 6/4/2010 10:36AM

    thanks Tash!! :D WOOOHOOOO!!!

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RTB444 6/4/2010 10:13AM

    Lovin' the positivity! Keep it going strong!!! You're doing so great and you're so dedicated to this new lifestyle. I agree--you are DOING this! Imagine how many more wonderful realizations you'll come across the more healthy you get. I have calculated I should be at my goal weight by 2011. I think the summer of 2011 is the perfect time for our NorthEastern SparkLadies trip!

emoticon GREAT JOB KIM!!!!!

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Undergarment Emergency! :O And My New Shadow! :)

Thursday, June 03, 2010

OK... So last night I was going through my clothes and realized that I need to get new clothes again. I thought I could wait a bit longer but this is something I need to take care of as soon as I can. I was watching a show on swimwear shopping tips the other day and I remembered that part about how to tell if a bikini top is too big (they has a model showing an example). Well all my bras look like the bikini top that was too big. So I found just one bra that I had that fit the best but it's borderline too loose.. but it will have to do for today. Yesterday I decided to measure myself according to a bra-fitting guide you can find easily online. I was surprised to find out I've gone down some sizes ALOT. I'm not gonna post my size but they are much more manageable now LOL. I'm down 2 band sizes and 1 cup size. And it's probably more of a difference because I was wearing the wrong size before, as many women do. So I'll be on a mission tonight, searching for new bras in my new size!! :) This makes me happy because I was so mad at my doctor for not recommending me for a reduction. Surgery scared me but I desperately wanted it. But she was right on her suggestion to lose weight first and then see what happens. I lost weight there ALOT and there's no need for surgery. I have no more back pain and I feel like a normal size now. No more people's eyes going straight to that area because that's the first thing that they saw even if I was completely covered up.

For the bottom region, it's less of an emergency but I still need smaller undies... I'm a bit tired of them bunching up. I bought a pack of the cuter Hanes Her Way "boy shorts" and according to the sizechart on the back I thought Medium was my size. I had always bought Medium but it didn't occur to me that since I lost weight that I should buy a smaller size anyway... So I'm stuck with 6 pairs of loose undies in Medium. But it does make me happy that I now have to go buy them in Small!

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I'd like to finish this blog post with sharing my moment from yesterday about my shadow. I have always hated my shadow. Shadows are harder to avoid than mirrors. I like my reflection in the mirror now that I've lost weight, but I didn't even think of my shadow. That has to change too right? So as I was going down the stairs to the train to go home, I noticed a DIFFERENT shape than I was used to seeing. I used to always look in a different direction so I didn't have to look at an oddly shaped thing that was supposed to be my shape... I hated that it was my shadow.... But yesterday was different. I LIKED what I saw! It was a feminine shape with attractive proportions. I saw a nice hourglass figure! I couldn't believe that was MY shadow! I stopped for a second to get a better view and let it sink in that it was my very own silhouette. Then I happily continued walking to get on the train. That was the highlight of my day. I am beginning to get used to the new me. Moments like that make it much easier!

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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BIRD2020 6/8/2010 12:37PM

    That is so funny about the undies! I put on a pair last week and realized that I could pull them up to near Urkel-level (about the bottom of my rib cage)!

Spark on! emoticon

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MARCYNA 6/8/2010 11:13AM

    WoW, congrats... emoticon

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ALIMESSA 6/4/2010 8:56PM

    I'm so happy for you...I've lost approx. 60 pounds and STILL have a DD cup...I hate my big boobs, and am definitley paying for a lift and reduction when this is all over! Macy's lingerie dept is AWESOME for helping you find the perfect fittingbra...if you're interested!

Congrats on all your success...keep up the great work!

As always,
Stay Strong!!

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DENIJA 6/3/2010 2:07PM

    High-five for breasts getting smaller! :D I always wanted mine to be smaller - in my country an average size is 75B, it's hard to find beautiful and/or sexy bra's even for C cup, not talking about D... I don't know why it never occurred me that they will get smaller if I lose weight... But it did! So, I' m really happy for you, because it IS EXCITING, and I bet you will love your new underwear ;)

Tomorrow I'll go out in the sun to check my shadow. emoticon

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RTB444 6/3/2010 11:36AM

    I'm so happy about your boobies! LOL, I know about your struggle with them in the past, and that we share the same huge boob problem. I've actually noticed my bras - even my sports bras- getting slightly looser. Maybe I should do what you did and measure them up! No more back pain is SO awesome! I'm incredibly happy for you =] When I worked in retail and in the beauty industry I was on my feet a lot and that would be the worst for my back because I'd be standing, fighting the gravitational pull forward from my boobs all day and my lower back would be shot at the end of the day. Now that I'm unemployed I don't stand for hours on end so I haven't had any problems with it lately. I've always wanted smaller boobs, but since losing weight I feel somehow my body is looking more in proportion even though I don't think I've lost that much in my boobs. Will definitely measure up and see where I'm at now, maybe I'll blog about it.

Congrats on your sexy silhouette shadow! You should have totally taken a phone cam shot, lol. I haven't even thought about my shadow, maybe I'll look out for it today. I haven't done my biking or workout video today because about an hour ago I felt a panic attack coming on. I haven't had one in forever and it kinda freaked me out because I had no idea where the anxiety was coming from. I laid down and did a guided meditation with Andrew Johnson and have since calmed down a bit. I will probably get my fitness in later this afternoon when I feel better.

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PAMNANGEL 6/3/2010 11:13AM

    Doesn't it just feel soooooo good? Yeah!!! I have only lost a small amount myself (so far), but it's enough that the waistband of my scrubs now rests on my hips instead of my waist. emoticon emoticon

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PAMNANGEL 6/3/2010 11:13AM

    Doesn't it just feel soooooo good? Yeah!!! I have only lost a small amount myself (so far), but it's enough that the waistband of my scrubs now rests on my hips instead of my waist. emoticon emoticon

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Weekly 30 Day Shred Results... Moved to Next Week..Arggh!

Wednesday, June 02, 2010

I was going to measure myself this morning and weigh in to see what progress was made after my first week of the 30 Day Shred. BUT I will have to postpone that until NEXT Wednesday... Grrrr.... I guess I should have taken into account that I bloat during this Time of the Month, so it's pointless to measure myself or weigh in... Oh well... On the bright side, I should expect to see the amount lost at a bigger number that includes several days instead of the pounds lost spread across in daily weigh-ins... a pound here, half a pound there...

Since the day I began "shredding" last Wednesday, I've been on a trial membership on the Jillian Michael's website. It's given me more precise evaluations and recommendations on my calorie intake and when to take breaks. To prevent over-training, she recommends 5 days of her workouts and 2 days of rest. I chose Sunday and Wednesday.

I'm resting today which works out great because I walked in heels yesterday and I gave myself a couple of blisters... I had to soak my feet yesterday and they are much better but I'm wearing little cotton rounds (I use these to remove eye makeup LOL) and socks to protect the sore spots. Which reminds me... I need to reapply Neosporin... I guess I was enjoying my skirt and heels so much that I "worked it" too much LOL I should've worn more comfy shoes if I was going to take a walk. But at least it was for a good reason. I went to Trader Joes to buy some of my favorite healthy foods... And snacks! It was worth it though. I have a box of their Multigrain and Flaxseed water crackers with me. They are so good!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RTB444 6/3/2010 7:50AM

    Sorry to hear about your tootsies emoticon

Happy to hear about your trial membership thingy, what did you learn on there about your calories intake n stuff? Im interested! Good luck with the shreddin', I'm sure you'll be pleased with Wednesday's results!!!

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FITKAT2010 6/3/2010 7:38AM

    Too bad that men don't wear heels and strut around in short skirts, right? Yummmm LOL

Have you tried Moleskin?

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ALIMESSA 6/3/2010 6:44AM

    I just love Trader Joes!!

Keep up the great work...can't wait to hear about the results next Wednesday!

As always,
Stay Strong!!

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Confidence and Adjusting to the New Me...

Tuesday, June 01, 2010

Ever since my clothes started getting too big, I have been putting less makeup on my face... I noticed that a while ago but I didn't realize the reasoning behind it. It's because I'm caring more for myself and making health a top priority for a change. I used to pack on makeup like there was no tomorrow. It didn't look bad or over the top, it was just that I had to do every part of my face. Now I sometimes go without any makeup at all or maybe just the minimum... just enough to enhance but not "red-carpet". I can't remember the last time I wore eyeshadow. I used to have a makeup collecting obsession. It made me happy and it was a security blanket to help me distract myself away from the truth. That I needed to lose weight.

Now my interest in clothing has not only resurfaced, but it is like a whole new world. It feels so good to have the confidence of knowing I can go into a "regular" store and find what I want and fit it. I used to buy things that I knew were a bit snug on me in hopes of "making it fit" in some way... you know what I mean... "Oh I'll just wear that shirt unbuttoned with a tank underneath...it's ok that I can't button it up...." I was lying to myself. IT WAS NOT OKAY! It hurt me to find a nice shirt, only to discover I couldn't wear it closed and that was the biggest size in the store! I was fed up (literally) so I lost weight and now I can buy the shirts I like AND close them comfortably.

So that's the good part... But what about adjusting to the new you? Being thinner has in a way, made me feel uncomfortable... I was in a comfort zone of eating whatever I wanted, hiding from situations where I had to be in the spotlight, hiding in unflattering clothes, and telling myself it was okay to not be active. I had been living in a sad shell for so many years, I'm a bit unsettled now. Don't get me wrong, I love my new healthy lifestyle and the rewards of it, I'm just not used to this new person I've become. I never thought I would be an early bird getting up every morning, including weekends, to do intense workouts, AND stick with it.

I was just having a discussion about this with someone and thinking about it made me feel a little emotional. I'm waving goodbye to the sad, depressed, insecure girl I was before and saying hello to the strong healthy woman I am today. Before I know it, I'll be used to the new me and I won't miss the old me AT ALL!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TIFFYDAWNMC 6/2/2010 9:02AM

    Wow, you've struck a chord with so many of us! It's amazing how we can hide from everyone, including ourselves... I recently discovered that when talking about things I'd done in the past (before adopting a healthy lifestyle) I was still saying "I usually...." then I finally stopped myself and changed it to "I used to...." I was still identifying with my previous habits rather than my new ones as being my current life and the others as past!

I still sometimes "see" my bigger body in the mirror...I'm still not used to seeing what others see, but I am beginning to relish the compliments...I just simply say "thank you" and try not to think too hard about it!

You are doing great, you are making a transformation and an adjustment and it will take time to get used to it! But you will! Keep working hard, keep loving your new self, you'll get used to her and love her even more!!!

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RTB444 6/2/2010 8:48AM

    You know Kim, I think this "makeup" situation is more prevalent than we think. When I was an addict, I wore a full face of makeup every single day. It took me between half an hour to an hour to just do my face. I always assumed it was a genuine love of makeup artistry and that my abundant collection of makeup was something to be proud of.
After giving up drugs and alcohol I realized I was wearing less and less makeup, now I hardly EVER where ANY. Only on a special occasion I will sometimes put makeup on. I also realized I used to wear my hair down everyday and now don't have a problem putting it up and away from my bare face. I think my makeup was a mask. I was afraid of showing my true self and worked in the mirror every day to hide it. My hair was my security blanket, if I was in an uncomfortable situation or bumped into somebody from my past it was easy to hide my face with my long hair.
I once saw on a tv show, a psychiatrist talking about women who wear a full face of makeup (the whole shabang - falsies and all) and how many women begin to wear more and more makeup the more uncomfortable they feel about themselves.
It's fun to love makeup, and fun to have so much of it. But yanno what? I think you should embrace the fact that you're letting your true self show without any cosmetic enhancement. It means you've come a long way, and subconciously you've already decided, "Hey, I don't need to hide anymore!" So run with it and love your bare face! I know I do! Plus, my boyfriend is happy with not getting his shirts stained every time I hug him, lol.
This is something to be really happy about and something to celebrate, embrace it!



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DENIJA 6/2/2010 5:54AM

    I feel you! I'm still torn between "should I hide" and "I look good, I should enjoy new me". This week I'm wearing skirts for the first time in years, they're my sisters skirt because I obviously don't have one and they fit me perfectly (and when I look to my sister I see nice body with just a little bit to lose, and we're the same high and same body type so I probably look something like her, but I still see the old me in a mirror sometimes). And I went out for a walk, dressed like that - with skirt, nice top, no make up, hair made in a nice way and enjoyed the walk. And then I met some old friends and they was surprised "how good I look" and told me to "wear skirts all summer!" and a boy I liked a lot some time ago told me that I have a "killer calves". It' s just... so weird. It still feels like they're lying to make me feel better, still can't believe I really have no excuses to wear skirts, sexy tops or feel beautiful.

You deserve to be happy and beautiful, you've done so much to reach these goals. ENJOY your new life, new you, I bet she's AMAZING! ;)

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ALIMESSA 6/1/2010 11:43PM

    You are doing great! Congrats on all your success! All changes, good and bad, take some getting used to...at least yours are good changes...embrace the new you...she is BEAUTIFUL and HEALTHY!

As always,
Stay Strong!!

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MIRANDA2526 6/1/2010 10:24PM

    I'm glad you posted this... I have been experiencing some of the same the last few weeks. Before, I blamed all of my problems and shortcomings on my weight. Now, though I still have more to lose, my body has changed, but I am realizing how much I hid behind the fat. I have been hiding from life, AND hiding from myself. It's hard to believe, but I have been so good at it that I am left now trying to find out who I am and reconcile all the changes. It's definitely not a part of weight loss that I anticipated or planned for.... but I'm sure we will be better for it. Although it's hard, it's good to feel the real you starting to emerge. Enjoy getting to know her! emoticon emoticon

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