Wednesday, March 05, 2014
First, great news: I lost 2.5 lbs last week, and according to SP I officially graduated from "obese" to merely "overweight." This has been about as good as it gets for me in my adult life of battling my weight, so I was thrilled.
Now, the weird news: this Saturday, after a leisurely 2 hrs spent at a cafe with some friends (and a brunch that may have cost me almost my entire day's allotment of cal, but who's counting), 2 of them decided to "kidnap" me and take me dress shopping, the better to celebrate my weight loss and look fabulous during our upcoming (mutual birthday) trip to Vegas.
Confession: I am NOT by any means a "girly" girl. I don't wear makeup, I can barely style my hair, clothes and shoes mean nothing to me...I only wear dresses or skirts when I absolutely have to. So, trying on about 25-30 vintage dresses for hours on end in a claustrophobic dressing room under hot lights for hours on end is akin to the seventh circle of hell for me.
But I gutted it out for my beloved friends, who are obviously wonderfully generous people and who ended up buying me three dresses, 1 evening and 2 daytime, which I am now obliged to wear in Vegas...and I think I was and am more than a little freaked out by the prospect, like I now for some reason feel enormous pressure to continue to lose weight, the better to look in these fitted, vintage-style dresses...
And so I immediately ate 4 slices of pepperoni pizza that evening, and great fistfuls of oily garlic bread and boneless chicken wings with ranch sauce the next day. Gained the 2.5 lbs back as of Monday's weigh-in. I'm officially obese again and thus ineligible for dress-wearing. Right? RIGHT?
Sometimes I think I'm too crazy to lose weight. It's tough to constantly be fighting your own worst instincts.
I'm trying to re-emerge from The Lost Weekend, but it's going to be an uphill battle as I have to work late 2 nights this week, yesterday (Monday) is normally an exercise day for me but I didn't get home until 9:30ish...did do 60m on my elliptical tonight though. Tomorrow is Zumba, Friday night too...if I can get in a workout on Saturday and Sunday too I should be OK, and if I can get the scale going in the right direction again next Monday, maybe I can alleviate this horrible feeling of guilt and failure