Monday, November 28, 2011
Why HELLO! How are you? I am doing FANTASTIC!
I would just like to announce that this Thanksgiving was the very BEST I ever had! It is beautifully ironic, because this is the first Thanksgiving holiday that decided to tighten our budget by not going out of town as usual. Instead, we focused on ourselves, our health and our relationship. I understand that it all about how you make of it, but I really wonder how we can top the fun we’ve had during this holiday.
Starting with Wednesday, I busted out a quick 3 mile run while ridiculously waving like a crazy woman to everyone I passed. I suppose I was not locked up for 5150 because it’s was Thanksgiving Eve and the holidays gives permission for many to let loose their inner nuts-o. Anyway, it was good and when I came back we decided to cut our work day short. (Benefits of being self-employed!) We left an hour early for our regular Wednesday evening hike at Runyon Canyon where I continued to blast fellow hikers and their cute huggable dogs with Turkey cheer.
On Thanksgiving, we jumped on our bikes and cycled a glorious 36 miles! YEEHAW! There is something seriously FREEING about letting loose on a bike people! And this is coming from me – the one who HATED cycling just this past summer! Maybe it’s a SoCal thing, but I also really enjoyed seeing how many people were out jogging and riding their bikes; people getting in charge of their health is always an inspiring sight for me. After the ride, I threw the turkey in the oven and a few hours later ate the most DELICIOUS and moist turkey I have ever had in my 32 years. WOW! (I employed a new method to get the breasts to come out moist, which made me nervous but relieved that it worked) After getting our healthy sides and dessert together, I came in a cool 1700 calorie day, yet still felt incredibly stuffed. SUCCESS! In continuing my journey towards healthy living, before the evening was over, I split and measured out all the leftovers into many plastic containers for future convenience and portion control.
On Friday, we decided to shake off our sore legs with a hike at a new place (Temescal Canyon, for you locals), except “shake off” wouldn’t exactly be the right term for it. After 1.5 miles of straight ascend, DH was about to kill me. Meanwhile, I was sweating but in a chirpy mood that made him grumpier, I think. (“Oooh look at this vegetation!” “I love this burn in my legs!” “Look at that bird!” “I am so at one with Mother Earth!”) But alas, we made it in one piece and proceeded to race over to our favorite restaurant (Reel Inn) right after to refuel. Now, you know the saying that you can even overdo it with healthy food? That would be my typical experience with Reel Inn. They have a ton of veggies and fresh seafood, but my typical meal would include: 1) a HUGE fillet of fish 2) a HUGE serving of rice 3) LOTS of steamed veggies 4) a salad and 5) lots of fried shrimp. Healthy? Yes. Calorie bank? BROKEN! This time, I reduced my meal to an egg white veggie omelet, steam veggies and one fried shrimp. I also drank a ton of water to buffer my hunger. SUCCESS! Later, we went and saw an indie flick (“Rampart” – Woody Harrelson was AMAZING but I hated the movie), where I pounced on DH’s popcorn (ugh!) after I was done with my grapes. Later we dove into our leftovers before topping the night off with my (skinny!) pumpkin cheesecake. Another awesome day!
We woke up on Saturday with a bit of a cold, possibly from overdoing it the past couple days. Silly me though, I wouldn’t dare tell him about my teensy sore throat out of fear that he would cancel our planned hike on Runyon. So we embarked on our planned workout on the BEAUTIFUL day, went to our usual place for a refill and then went to see another indie flick after (“Take Shelter” – AWESOME!). Okay so I realized over this weekend that I can NOT resist popcorn. I always prepare by bringing fruit, but the minute DH sits down with his HUGE tub of popcorn, my face dives in that bucket without a thought. The only saving grace is that he eats it kinda fast so I don’t eat all of it. CRIMINY. Anyway, after having a great time there we went home and went through another container of leftovers. Yummy!
On Sunday, I woke up feeling extremely energetic and healthy, but poor DH felt extremely under the weather. I asked him if he wanted to cancel our bike ride (but not in a genuine way, I admit *evil laugh*) and he was such a trooper to say no! We agreed to do 20-ish miles and reassess from there. Well, people, we ended up busting out 37.5 MILES – my longest bike ride yet! WOWZA! And my legs aren’t even too tired today! Combined with perfect 80 degree weather, it was truly the most amazing day for a bike ride anyone could ask for. At the end of the ride, I think DH was sick of eating healthy and decided that we were to eat at In-N-Out. So we did and it was delicious, even after I health-ified my burger. Frosted Flakes for dinner and guess what? They were grrreat (meals at inappropriate times always taste better).
And so that leaves us to today – Finally Monday. After 5 days-ish of fun, I just about forgot about my morning routine this morning. Luckily, I had enough to do at work to keep me from whining about how the weekend is over. What is on my mind now though is that – can you believe this?! – Wednesday is December 1st. OMG. *sigh* Time for November reassessment, get my goals in line for December, reflect on the year a bit and see what I want to do in 2012. I don’t know about you, but I am not ready for the year to end. I mean, I just got used to writing “2011” on my checks. LOL
Ok Sparkies, I’m out. I hope you had a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend and I’ll be looking forward to reading all your November recap blogs and goals for December.
Thanks for reading!
Monday, November 21, 2011
I am not doing well.
I didn’t want to blog about it, but it’s become evident in my moods and commitment level that I really should just openly admit it in (desperate!) order to “keep the faith.” I initially didn’t speak about it because in true optimistic yet frantic fashion, I hoped that it would be over in just a few days, but after stepping into Week 2 of this … funk … if you will, it’s clear that I may be the one to wait for its exit. As a self-professed perfectionist, admitting such defeat is a blow to my ego, but really, it’s time to take the reins of this thing. I am tired of the stress of the matter exhausting me from taking the good – and there *are* plenty – for granted.
So here are my “blows”:
1) I gained 4 pounds in 5 days.
2 weekends ago, I awoke two mornings in a row of reaching my goal of 109 lbs. All the woohoos, yeahs and fist-pumps could not have prepared me to see the wildly changing numbers to follow. 5 days later, my weight jumped to 113. Of course, I know that it is absolutely impossible for me to truly gain that weight, which was confirmed later by some eerie bodily functions that I’m too proper to speak about on this blog. I am – and have most of my life – been a healthy person, so for me to suffer from any abnormalities other than a sniffle or a sore joint is shocking. Since that day, my body has not been the same and I have moods to match it. I am fully admitting defeat of this thing and can only wait it out. DH really wants me to see a doctor – hate it! – but I keep putting it off. I suppose if it continues after the holiday, I will think about seeking a professional opinion. (Currently, I am swinging between 112-113)
2) Horrific running sessions
At this point, I have no idea 1) why I run and 2) WTH was I thinking when I considered doing the half marathon. It’s no secret that I’ve fallen out of love with running as of late, but my commitment REALLY got tested when I suffered a horrible asthma attack during my 7-miler last week. I suppose the vicious side stitch at mile 4 should have been a warning, but I get these all the time and just breathe and run them out. I did not expect it to escalate as it did at the Mile 6 and then doubling over soon after. Luckily, I was about .60 miles from home and I almost passed out by the time I got my inhaler. And of course, because I am NUTS, after I got a few huffs, I went back out and slammed out 1.25 miles out to “punish” myself. (In retrospect: WTH?!) The next two runs the rest of the week was mentally draining; I felt like I was fighting with myself to squeak out every last mile. Exhausting.
To make up for last week’s disastrous 7 miler, I did it again today. It was pretty successful (thanks to my inhaler beforehand!), but even towards the end I was still asking myself why on earth do I want to do the HM?! If you were to ask my soul, it would point towards my hidden desire to improve my 10k times. It’s almost like I choose to run the HM because I hate it, because improving my 10k times would be a cop-out. I have made lists upon lists of pros and cons to the HM, but I am still undecided. I don’t know. More soul-searching is needed in this department, it would seem.
After all this brouhaha, I decided that I will take BACK its power over me and focus on the GOOD things in my life! For instance, I am complaining about my weight but – LOOK! – I am still down 17 pounds on my worst day, I *DO* like the way I look! Also, I am complaining about running higher mileage yet not too long ago, I was just getting back into running! Lastly, even with these obstacles currently in my life, I am *still* working out and eating healthy! All so so so good things, really and 1,000 steps further than where I started.
In another exercise towards self-propelled optimism, I have some other GREAT updates about my healthy living goals. It’s been rough lately, so I am actually pleased – excited even! – to share my successes thus far in this month:
Emotional Eating – UNDER CONTROL!
Even with these difficulties, it got under control thanks to planning every day’s meals (down to my snacks!) and making sure I eat every 3 hours. Meal planning takes the spontaneity of thought out of eating, which is where I usually get into trouble. I really like not having to come up with things to eat on the spot; it makes me so much less stressed.
30+ Mile Bike Ride – DONE!
Last Saturday, we embarked on a 32 mile bike ride! It was SO hard, thanks to the dreadful 10 straight miles of fighting headwind. My legs burned like you wouldn’t believe after the ride, but it was kinda cool seeing my newly acquired quad muscles stand out.
Strength Training – DOING IT!
4x a week: Plank (90 seconds)
3x a week: 1 set of crunches (25 reps), 1 set of bicycle crunches (25 reps), and 3 sets of Superman (60 seconds)
Note: I can ALREADY feel the difference in the ab and back workouts. I’m much less tired during my longer runs and cycling sessions. Sweet!
Be Social – I’M A BUTTERFLY!
So far, I’ve attended a birthday lunch, a housewarming visit and a birthday dinner this month. Tomorrow night I have a dinner with my best friend and another dinner planned next week with an old dear friend. I’m still nervous but I think more social opportunities should help “numb” my anxiety.
Try new recipes – I’M A COOKIN!
So far this month I have tried:
Pumpkin Swirl Cheesecake Yogurt Cups by SkinnyTaste – AMAZING!
A new recipe for super fluffy pancakes for DH – RAISING THE BAR FOR PANCAKES!
No Bake Pumpkin Cheesecake by SkinnyTaste – UNBELIEVABLE!
Lemon Cake with Greek Yogurt – SKINNY RECIPE DRESSED IN SINFUL CLOTHING!
Stop freaking out about the weather – In progress
Honestly, without a gym membership (sob!) rain means no workout, so this goal is in limbo.
In other mid-month news, I am really excited about Thanksgiving for once. Typically on Thanksgiving we escape family obligations by running away to some cool city away from anyone and everyone we know, but since our financial situation has changed, we are staying in town – and I’m actually excited about it!
For the day, we will be starting the day with gourmet coffee from our favorite coffee shop. Once we are suped up with caffeine, we put our hyper selves on our bikes and belt out a 34-mile bike ride – sans headwinds, I hope! After our ride, we shower and fill up with a good post-workout snack and I prepare our very quick little Thanksgiving dinner consisting of turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy, Spanish green beans and spiced mashed sweet potatoes. (It’s only us two, so we make only what we love) After dinner, comes a trip to the movie theatre, then coming home for some No-Bake Pumpkin Cheesecake. Healthy, fun and zero dread of the family drama, just the way I like it.
Well Sparkies, this is where I end things for the day. Thanks for reading my blog, your support is always so appreciated! I really wish you all a healthy and relaxing Thanksgiving. Dont' forget to blog about how Thanksgiving went for you; I'd love to read them all!
Monday, November 07, 2011
As much as I love the fall, I’m so happy October is over. It was such a stressful month and, when I look back, I see so much angst. However, with the angst comes much discovery about myself in this journey towards healthy living, which then actually directly feeds into my goals for November, therefore making all that discomfort it worth it after all. =)
-----OCTOBER RECAP -----
October was ALL about the unrecorded binging. Whether it was the Emotional Eating Beast coming full out with arms swinging or me inadvertently putting my body in starvation mode, I fell off the wagon hard mid-month for a few good days. After getting back on the wagon, I became completely obsessed with food; it was ALL I thought about from the morning I woke up until the very second I closed my eyes. It was more than just perusing food blogs; I was salivating at the keyboard, imagining myself taking every succulent bite, ending with a certain amount of emotional distraught for not being in maintenance just yet so I could eat the darn thing. It made me GRUMPY, it made me CRY. I was not a happy camper.
So of course with the binging, I ended October with a slow loss. I lost 2 pounds the first couple of weeks, but then it completely STOPPED at 112. Even after getting back on the wagon, I tried so hard to be good but that scale would not get past the 112 mark. I was so mad at the scale, at myself, at SparkPeople, at my cat – you name it, I was MAD! I wasn’t even sure how in the world I could continue this weight loss journey. I also thought about *gasp!* giving up.
One late night while my honey was snoring away next to me, I picked up my lovely iPhone and started perusing websites on health. I don’t remember how, but I did come across a female researcher with a new(ish?) book about a new way to lose weight using a method related to intuitive eating. Well, I skipped the method (even when I’m at my most hysterical over weight loss, I will always stand firm in my opinion that the SP way works – at least for me), because what caught my eye was her blurb about putting the body in starvation mode. During weight loss, if your calories are too low to accommodate your exercise plan, your body can and will stall itself out in what we sometimes refer to as a “plateau.” In addition, other unpleasant symptoms will follow e.g. grumpiness, food obsession, etc. See where I’m going here? Well, I felt HORRIBLE for putting myself through that crap! Weight loss is more than mathematical – it is psychological and biological as well. How could I have not realized that the body – the sophisticated creation that it is – would of course include backstops in place that ensures that I have the best chance of survival in case I get trapped in the middle of a desert or deserted island? That little piece was so enlightening that after researching it a little more, I increased my calorie intake to 1500+ and then a week later … VIOLA! I am down a pound and my honey is very happy that I am no longer stomping around screaming about every little thing gone wrong. (That poor guy, I tell you)
Another unexpected discovery in the month of October is food sensitivity. I completely forgot that during the previous times I lost weight, after eating really well for 6 months straight, my body does this thing where I can *feel* it purring along, but then goes completely nuts when I feed it trash. So here I am, 6 months later of eating well and then suddenly I feel my tummy sputter something unpleasant when I decided to nibble on some Hershey’s milk chocolate. Thinking it was a fluke, I nibbled on some brownies another time and again my face turned green. Thankfully, these blips do not happen when I consume gourmet desserts (my body wants only the best out of my wallet! lol) or on any sweets that I happen to make at home. I suppose some would consider this a blessing. I might have to agree; the nauseous experiences were all I needed to remember to keep me passing the Halloween candy bucket with ease.
It would only be healthy to balance out the negatives with some positives for October, so here we go: I am really happy about:
1) Bike Rides:
a. I completed FOUR cycling sessions total of over 75 miles.
b. CYCLING, I LOVE YOU! Running is and has been my go-to sport for a few years now; it feels like I’m cheating on it every time I enjoy the wind in my hair while pedaling furiously down the bike path. Actually, it more feels like a brand new romance or even – gasp! – an illicit affair. I am at the point where I LIVE and BREATHE to ride my bike, which with my schedule, means that I try my best to survive every day of the week for those awesome Sunday mornings when I can jump on my bike and take off. It’s beautiful, really.
c. CONFESSION: I wake up super early on Sundays and start jumping on the bed like it’s Christmas. My DH is less than pleased, but whatever – he’s finally awake to go!
d. SIDENOTE: We had to cancel the bike ride yesterday due to rain (Rain in SoCal? Wtf?!) and I WAS SO MAD! I mean, you wouldn’t believe it. Over a *bike ride?!?!* you’d say. You would have thought someone stole my money or hurt my cat. Honestly, I was ridonkulous and a serious P.I.T.A. My poor kitties were confused and diving for cover and my honey was following their lead.
2) Running: I did not miss any runs – YAY! When life got in the way (or I had to miss that one workout day due to exhaustion), I moved my workouts around to make them up. I feel especially accomplished and proud of myself for that, especially since I’ve started to get more and more excited about biking and less excited about running.
3) Refueling: I am *so* much better about getting my chocolate milk in after my runs. Result? Much more energy throughout the day. WIN!
4) Efficient Workouts: It used to take me about 1 hour 40 minutes to reach my goal of burning 400 calories on my “light” workout days, however, through the combination of running and walking, I’ve gotten that down to just down an hour (excluding warm up/cool down). I am ecstatic! Now I can rearrange my schedule so that the 400 calories goal days can be raised to 500 and one of my 600 calories burned days can be reduced down to 500, thus decreasing the time spent working out without compromising my goals.
5) OCTOBER GOAL - Stretch & Increase Flexibility: I did do this, but my flexibility did not increase. Instead, it decreased! I think the cooler weather made my muscles so much tighter.
6) OCTOBER GOAL – Cook once a week minimum: I know I was trying to make easier goals to accommodate my sick cats but looking back I have no idea what I was thinking. In addition to 5 breakfasts a week (I never count these), I already cook once a week at bare minimum. My goal should have been to try new recipes.
-----NOVEMBER GOALS -----
Okay, past is now behind us, now moving forward!
After having a crazy eating month of October, I am ready to tackle my emotional eating issues in November. November 2011 will be the month that I will explore my cravings and triggers, practice awareness, and exploring methods to karate chop the Emotional Eating Beast in half (or at the very least, practicing damage control).
1) 1500+ calories a day. No more starvation mode!
2) Eat ANYTHING I want, so long as it’s modified to be healthier by:
a. Split it into 2+ servings so that it can be shared with someone else and/or saving it for another meal
b. I make it myself, as I will know everything that is in it
c. I vege-tize it. The only fast food I will eat (or won’t make me throw up) is In-N-Out burgers. I typically order my cheeseburger Protein-Style (replace buns with huge, crispy lettuce leaves), which I love. I have to admit that while I have been dying to try Five Guys, the one thing that holds me back is their lack of healthy options. My plan for this place – or any other burger place really – is to order my cheeseburger bunless with extra (read: 3X!) lettuce, tomatoes and grilled onions. That way, I can totally enjoy the burger while getting in my veggies!
3) Have a dessert plan
a. NO CANDY OR CHEAP SWEETS! Yes I realize that it contradicts with Eating Goal #2, but candy and cheap sweets makes me nauseous. I must remember the tasty sweetness is not worth the sickness.
b. Gourmet desserts or desserts I make myself only! I don’t seem to have a problem with soufflé’s or anything sweet I make from Skinnytaste.
c. Kid Cereal is ok! I know this sounds weird, but the fact that it incorporates 1% milk (calcium!) makes it okay by me. Plus, I share the bowl with my honey, which makes it more fun and keeps me from eating 3 servings in one sitting.
4) Keep the fridge filled with fruit.
a. If I can’t tame the Beast, I at least will feed it with something healthy!
b. Make it a quick, convenient grab by organizing them in serving sizes ahead of time in plastic containers
5) Journal on anything – my book, phone, napkin – whenever I feel like the Beast is making its appearance
a. Explore cravings: Sweet = Need Vitamin C? Beef = Need Protein? Junk Food = Healthy fats like avocado?
b. Track triggers: What is happening at the exact moment? What am I feeling? What would make me feel better? What can/would distract me?
Eating: Things to Continue
1) Log in food
2) Keep snacks in the car and in my purse
3) Try new recipes at Skinnytaste and other healthy cooking blogs
4) Eat lots of veggies
5) Friday Pancake Nights with healthy pancakes!
6) No coffee or tea after 1 pm
1) Accomplish a 30-mile bike ride – Hopefully the weather will hold up for me to do this!
2) Start Half Marathon training
3) Start small strength training plan
a. Plank: 1 minute a day, M-F
b. Crunches: 25/day MWF, slowly building to 4 sets of 25 reps
c. Superman: 3x MWF
4) Stop getting upset over the weather
Exercise: Things to Continue
1) Easy runs and speedwork
3) Mental power during runs
Social Anxiety: Goals
1) MAKE PLANS with people! Once a week ideally, but once every couple of weeks minimum.
2) Keep hands busy and/or drink lots of water when feeling anxious around people
Well, that’s it from Camp Kittyroxx. Have a great month every one! We can survive Thanksgiving!
Friday, October 28, 2011
It’s been awhile since I last blogged, but really, I’ve been busy! (Like, for real!) I have been sleep deprived, hungry, and drained physically and emotionally. I have been a real P.I.T.A. in the grump department, but thank goodness it’s over now. (I think …)
Last Saturday I spent the day cooking for 19 people for my best friend’s engagement party on Sunday. I didn’t go to bed until 3 am on Sunday – I’m an “in bed by 10 pm” kind of gal, so this was REALLY late! By the time I made it to bed my back hurt from stomping around my kitchen for 14 hours and hovering over my hot stove. There was ZERO sleep to be had that night; I awoke to my alarm enthusiastically chirping at 6:30 am. I leapt out of bed with the kind of energy and adrenaline that only anxiety could bring (and enhanced by a tall cup of coffee). On the more positive end, I stepped on the scale that morning at a beautiful 111.7 – my lowest a.m. weigh-in this round – WOOHOO!
Later at the party on Sunday afternoon (obviously skipping my bike workout – hmph), my social anxiety took over and I ended up eating bucketloads of food. Even though I already ate a big breakfast, I dove headfirst into all the Mexican spread I worked so hard to make. Call it “testing” my goods, whatever. Being around all these people I didn’t know got me incredibly nervous and I soothed it by dosing myself with at least 4 enchiladas, Spanish rice, guacamole, refried beans, tacquitos, carne asada, 2 slices of Tres Leches cake and apple dumplings (did I forget anything? Hmm). It’s a good thing I quit alcohol awhile back; had I been buzzed, the damage would have been greater. I went home pained from my stomach muscles stretched to its limits. Guilt overtook me for the evening, but apparently not enough so that I didn’t avoid scarfing down a few squares of these cheesecake marbled brownies I made earlier! Ugh! Luckily, damage control arrived when I passed out immediately on my pillow that night.
On Monday, I woke up with a super dose of Eater’s Remorse. How could I allow myself to eat uncontrollably as I did? Was it even worth it?! (Actually, uhm the food was amazing) I worked SO hard to get my weight down to where it is now; now look at the extra work I created for myself! And of course on top of this verbal beating I gave myself, a wave of emotional and physical exhaustion washed over me. I could not get out of bed, less fathom the idea of getting my workout outfit on to go for a run. No siree. When I did finally get up, I decided to take a dreaded peek at the scale; I just about burst into tears when I saw the numbers “114.3” glaring back at me. Intellectually I knew that the weight gain was solids and such, but I was still *furious* at my puffy self and my self-control (or lack thereof)! At breakfast I sat grumpily, angrily smothering the blueberry compote on my whole wheat pancakes while b*tching about working out. Thankfully, my honey lovingly forced me to take the day off. Hmm, I thought. Can I actually skip 2 days of workouts? Well, it doesn’t matter what I thought, I was being forced to rest. I admit that I enjoyed skipping the workout, except that once again, I dove into food AGAIN! I raided the leftovers in the fridge and didn’t even bother to track even a smidgen. *shudder* It might have even qualified as a binge, I don’t know. All I do remember is that my stomach hurt again at the end of the night and I went to bed once again mad at myself.
Tuesday morning I awoke to a 114.1 weigh-in. Ugh, I thought, as I got off the scale. I worked out in the a.m. expecting the speed I get in my runs after resting for 2 days, but it never arrived; I crawled along like a slug. I think sometime during the day I realized that I'm going to have to forgive myself, and a good start would be to recommit back to the healthy lifestyle. I believe I momentarily forgot about this little commitment when I invaded my honey’s dinner (bad habit of mine!) and later dipped into my cereal cabinet for dessert, but what is one more splurge, right?
On Wednesday, I FINALLY woke up feeling like a real person, instead of some zombie! My eyes popped open when the alarm went off and a bolt of energy surged through my body. I was alive! My a.m. weigh in showed me somewhere in the 113’s – YES!!! My morning and evening workouts totally ROCKED – I blazed at every workout! (cooler temps helped tremendously) I did have a temporary panic when my honey took me to the lovely Via Alloro in Beverly Hills, though. I couldn’t resist the temptation of ordering the Pumpkin Parmesan Reggiano Risotto, but I worked it out at the end by taking half home. (whew, that was a close one) I ended the day proud of myself; I *knew* I was back on track and I was even excited for Thursday’s workout. Progress!
Thursday was another momentous day, starting with another weigh-in in the 113’s. Woohoo! My speed session that day added another “win” in the books for the day; it was hard, but I could definitely feel and see the results of the hard work I put into the sport in the last 7 months. That evening I had the house to myself and I ended up treating myself to a feast of Chicken Paprikash filled with veggies, roasted potatoes and steam broccoli. I ended the evening with a Skinny Pumpkin Latte (made with a batch of Pumpkin Butter I made earlier!) and a couple of tangerines. My tummy was full of comfort food, my tastebuds were happy from the activity and I was emotionally “filled.” A date with yourself can do WONDERS.
Finally Friday – today! – I woke up to a weigh-in of … ready??? … 112.2 lbs. Shut the front door, peoples! I swear, I was so excited that I grabbed my poor cat a little too tight and kissed her a little too hard. But whatever, this is PROOF that I really am back! I already decided that I am to expect a weight gain this week, but I didn’t REALLY expect that I’d get back to point zero – no negative progress here! The best part of this morning’s weigh in is that it *feels* like confirmation that I am doing the right thing. Thank goodness.
…WHAT I LEARNED…
1) I actually proved to myself that I CAN get back on track. I tend to become very intense with my goals; however, some time ago I realized that it is not just because I am ambitious, I just do not trust myself to restart any streak that I happen to break. But! This challenging week just proved that I can and I did. I should remember this experience the next time I pressure myself to workout when my body is asking – sometimes not so politely – for a rest day.
2) Splurging with food and/or skipping workouts can be scary, but can actually be nourishing/replenishing to the soul. This is an important thing to know and remember, as it is the soul itself that is the driver of the road to life and all our goals. Sometimes I just need an extra break day and definitely more treats than I’ve been allowing myself (maybe go from a few times a week to every day?). I’ll reconsider restructuring my “plan.”
The last 3 pounds to 109 are going to be HARD, especially at my 5’0 height. Furthermore, I actually want to fluctuate between 106-109 lbs during maintenance, which means it’s actually about 6 pounds to go instead of 3. To compensate for the holidays, I will be loosening my ambitions by aiming for 109 by 12/31/2011 and to arrive at 107 by 1/31/2012. Of course this coincides with my half marathon on January 15, but the weigh loss is only at ½ pound or so per week which should make it a manageable 250 calorie deficit per day. I think I can do that.
At this point, the “end” of this phase is in sight and I just can’t wait to get there! I am so excited to use my maintenance plan; it really needs to stop collecting dust. *sigh*
Okay Sparkies, I’m out! Thank you for reading my LONG blog. Have a fabulous weekend. I’ll be focusing on living (and thinking!) healthy …
P.S. I *was* going to post my progress pics, but I swear even after losing 6 whopping pounds, I look *bigger.* Weird!
Monday, October 10, 2011
Before I start this blog, allow me to fill you on one little fact about myself: I am crazy.
Okay! Now that we got that out of the way, my blog today is to report that I did not work out today because … oh my goodness this is so hard to admit … I am overtrained.
Little tiny signs started cropping up when I inadvertently started running 5 days a week. I’m more of a 3-4 days a week kind of person, but I just got so darn impatient with my calorie goals that I found running on walking days helped speed up the workout, so, I started running only certain parts of my walking route. It worked out great and the pounds *melted* right off (double bonus!), skyrocketing my happiness.
But then my moods started getting more and more sour, and before I knew it, I started blowing up on every little bad thing like one apocalypse after another. I first shrugged it off as “moodiness,” but I knew in the very small back of my mind that I needed more than my one-day-a-week break.
Getting my DH to incorporate exercise into his routine is something I really want to help make happen. We already hike twice a week, but I finally gave in to the idea of going on a bike ride two Sundays ago to help get him more active. What I did NOT count on was how much fun I’d have! After taking an hour or so to get acclimated (and stop freaking out at every car that drove by – my BIGGEST fear, even as a runner), that teensy little competitive streak burst out of my body and I suddenly split away like a cat out of a burning house. I *flew* down the bike path on the beach like a blur with my heart racing crazily, quads burning and adrenaline pumping through my veins. Ideas about biking the LA marathon flew into my head as well as a half century ride. I started this bike ride for DH, but I finished it for ME.
Being that that fun bike ride took place on a rest day, a logical person would think about taking a break another day of that week. But I am not logical; I am crazy! I decided to continue my workouts through another week without that well-needed break.
That’s when things started going haywire. First, whereas my weight was melting off, my weight would not move. It was a depressing discovery, but being that it was not a gain, I tried my best to shrug it off (not easy with the major mood thing I was still going through!). Second, (TMI warning!) I started getting constipated, which is not me at all. No matter how much green I ate, things would not “move.” Third, and you may have seen this in my status, I had trouble falling asleep – another department I rarely have trouble in.
I suppose at this point I should have rested, but I so badly wanted to go to this really awesome bicycle event here in downtown Los Angeles where they shut down 10 miles of streets for bicycle riders, walkers, skateboarders, rollerbladers, etc. Again, the event took place on my rest day (yesterday), but overtrained or not, I was NOT going to miss it! It was a lot of fun, but I ended up waking up this morning dreading my workout – so much so that I was almost ANGRY that I had a workout planned today.
After pacing, stomping, and whining around the house, DH finally said “Why don’t you just skip it?”
I paused. What he said wasn’t groundbreaking, but somehow his simple question made me stop in my tracks.
Okay, so why can’t I skip it? I asked myself.
I probably thought about it for a good ten minutes before negotiating with myself that Sunday’s workout would count for Tuesday, and the workout I’d miss today would be completed on Tuesday.
DEAL! I told myself, and spent the day smiling, happily working and even went out for a glorious lunch that I can’t really track since it was a restaurant meal. I almost considered ditching tracking for the day (and calling it a day of nourishment!), but I stopped myself; I don’t want to get too carried away on this rest thing. (Still don’t trust myself; I think that if I stop doing one thing temporarily, it will snowball into zero workouts and ending up in square one … again)
So as I sit here and type this, I really hoping that today’s rest day will do the trick to get me back on track (and snapping 99% less). I actually started considering taking tomorrow off as well, but that makes me really nervous; it took a lot out of me to take today off. Since DH and I may start biking on Sundays, I may start moving my rest days to Mondays, which would be FANTASTIC because 1) Mondays – ewww! And 2) It’s really nice to not have to work out on a weekday.
So there’s my update, and um, if you are still reading this, I am totally amazed! Sorry if it’s boring and TMI-y.
Have a good week folks, and thanks for reading!
P.S. Any comments about your experiences on overtraining is welcome!
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