Thursday, January 27, 2011
I know the east is getting dumped on but here in Southern Colorado, it was 60 and sunny, it was just a beautiful day, I felt so good.....I got to walk at lunch time today and I love doing that.
Tomorrow is suppose to be even better.. near 70...
I'm going to enjoy each minute that I can outside, because I know by Tuesday winter will return and I'll be a frozen pop syle once again....
I found that if I came home have a hot cup pf tea, that helps me relax and I don't seem to have to poke food in my mouth....
As I drove through the park today I saw a large women sitting in her car eating french fries, it flashed in my mind that I use to that, go to a fast food place get fries and chicken sandwich and stuff myself, for some strange reason it calmed me for a while...I thought OMG I use to do that too..but no more..I felt sorry for the women thinking I know how you feel I was there once too....
My goal now is to find other ways to calm or relax my stress besides food.....
I'm learning, it's not easy but I'm learning...
at times I still can feel myself eating from frustration or anger, some how now the food doesn't taste...
what ways do you calm your stress , frustrations or anger????
have a healthy week end
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Over the week end we had a few friends over for good conversations and to catch up on things.....
I wanted to share some of the things we talked about after I had time to think about what was said.....lots was said and we talked about the last 30 years of our lives, the good stuff and the sad and not so good stuff....
I of course talked about my weight, one lady said I can't believe you lost 200 + pounds, I did not think you weight that much...I knew you were chunky or chubby but I can't believe I did not really notice it, Gary also said he never thought I was that size, so I brought out my picture. at my heaviest weight, at least I think so....they all looked at it in amazement...saying wow I can't remember you looking like that.....They said we never saw you like that..funny when I think about I think about your loving and giving nature.....
I guess I'm the one who thought that everyone was talking about me and my weight, but find out I had the biggest problem with it...not to say I regret or want to go back there but it hurt my feeling many times when I was bashing myself for being so darn FAT....
I have the feeling I'm not the only one....once we get on that negative track it's hard to get off..
I'm so thankful I found Sparkpeople and al the wonderful people I have meet here.
The encouraging ones, the supportive one and the one that I have ben able to help too.
I get a lot of spark messages from people who tell me I inspire them or give them hope....
I think that's why SparkPeople is so powerful, it's about being positive , not focus on weight loss but starting a healthy lifestyle, in amy way that means to each person....we don't have to fit into a certain mold, just find a way that makes you healthy and happy....
so I'm rambling here, but know I appreciate each person who takes the time to read my blog and give me advice..
Lets all have a huge healthy day......make the best of each minute and it won't be back again...
Have a Healthy Day
for those that don't know my before and after picture here I am..
I was big
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
I would like to thank everyone for the beautiful women award, I tried to send everyone a thank you but ran out of time..
Then today Coach Jen sent a message that we should not be doing that as it can get out of hand.......
Had a fair day, I got a lot of exercise in today and for some reason I have been cold , and crabby...seems everything rubbed me the wrong way today... I had to bite my tongue a few times and scream at myself to not say what was on my mind.....I'm not sure if I'm getting sick or just tired....I might sleep in tomorrow if I'm still not not 100%. I do tend to push myself hard all the time.....but I'm working on that....
I'm done with the kitchen and going to call my sister, she e-mailed me about coming to visit. for those who don't know my family live 1500 miles from me, so we talk mostly on the phone and by e-mail.....
I shared a blog about me moving because I was sure they were all ashamed of me, being the fat sister that I was......anyway I have lived here since 1977 , and do have thoughts at times about moving back, not sure that would be a great idea but for now I'm staying ere till at least Gary retires and we decide what we want to do...today I want to be some place sunny and warm, I am feed up with winter and being cold....
so that's it from Southern Colorado......
have a healthy Wednesday
Monday, January 24, 2011
I re read the Spark article 'IS WEIGHT LOSS STRESSING YOU OUT"
if you're like me and wondering where your going with this program or maybe even your life you might want to read this article.. as always Dean Anderson has hit it right on.....
I am stressing out over my weight loss for many reasons ....mostly it's a place I use to only dream about....I had my life on hold for so many years....I would tell myself if only I was a normal weight person I would do...I had a long list of things I would have done if only.....I blamed every problem I had on my weight, I told myself if only I lost this weight I would not have these problems and issues......
as you all know I was wrong, we all have problems and issues and weight is only part of them....
I have had a bit of a pity party this morning and darn it's only 7.30 am.....I thought about my friends who dumped me because I lost the weight, my sisters who are uncomfortable about me no longer being the fat sister..they are not over joyed by my success, not say they are not happy for me but it now puts some pressure on them to loose weight or at least get healthy, my Dad is so worried that I'm sick and dieing from some dreaded illness and I'm not telling, he says how can you have lost so much weight and not be sick.....well I let the pressure from others get me down.....
I read a quote yesterday that said you can't please everyone so learn to please your self...
I sure need to start doing that....I need to get more confidence in myself, and my judgement.
I went over my food tracker, way back for months and could not find a day I went over my calorie range ...I re read my journal and all the fears I have about eating goodies and not being able to stop... has never happened...yes I had a treat or two but then I stopped.....
I think I'm expecting me to be perfect and I do know that is not possible but then why do I put so much pressure on myself...at work I want to be the best teacher, I spend hours looking for fun things to do and even spend my own money to get things I want to teach.. they are nice to me but others just get by and they still get paid , they are still nice to them...so why do I strive to be perfect...who the heck knows but starting today...I'm going to try and do my best but if it doesn't happen try the next day.....sound simple enough but know it will take a lot of effort...
sort of sad when ya think I can be better to others than to myself when in the end I'm all I have..and our Lord....
Have a great day, I'm off to set new goals that don't have to deal with loosing weight...
part of me knows it's about control, I can control my eating , and weight loss but I can' control other people, and how they feel or what they do.....
Have a healthy Monday
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Another week begins...I'm planning my meals, especially my snacks..
Trying to get more variety in my menus..thinking that will help to stop some of my cravings for junk food.
Also trying to find a way to get more exercise in , I'm getting board with my exercise bike, treadmill and the walk away the pounds and my other DVD....
I'm also tired of the winter weather and we don't really have it so bad here. It was 53 today but it started out at 10.....
Funny thing today I have had a craving for apples, not a bad thing but just different....lets me know I spend to much time thinking about food....I'm trying to work on this, making a new list of things I can do instead of eat.
I got some new beads to start a new bracelet project, downloaded a new book to my NOOK.
taking it one day at a time, doing my best today , and try not to worry about tomorrow till it gets here.
Have a healthy week, do the best you can ...keep the positive self talk going, that seems to help.
Off to pound my chicken breast...lol they are more tender if you pound them thin....
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