Monday, January 02, 2012
Yesterday I woke up feeling awful! My stomach eventually calmed down last night, but my fever went up to 101.5. Ick. I am feeling a bit better today, but I am so tired & sore. I am glad I had the day off today! Work tomorrow is definitely going to be hard! My belly button still isn't healing right, so I may have to call the surgeon again this week. Yuck.
There is so much I want to do, but I still have to wait until I am healed. Mentally I just want to jump around, exercise, and do everything I used to. But when I have to bend over or want to roll over, it still hurts & reminds me that I can't do it all yet.
On a positive note, I am starting to get motivated to do wedding planning again, so I am excited about that! I like saying I am getting married THIS year =) when we got engaged it was in 2010! That seems like a loooooong time ago!
Thursday, December 29, 2011
So I have been putting off going to the gym and working out at home. I just didn't have the motivation to do it more often. I always had some reason to not go. Most of the "reasons" were actually excuses though. I admit that!! No gym partner, rain, too tired, etc. Now that I have been on my butt for most of my time from this recovery, I decided I am going to make myself exercise once I am better! I DO have free time, I just need to schedule some workout time! I just NEED to do it, and I will do it when I am able to again!
I randomly started tracking one day in August and just stuck with it. I made up my mind and just did it!!! Why can't I just workout?? I do understand WHY I put it off. I can track all my food at once, do one at a time, and even track the day before or after if I want to. I can't pre-workout for tomorrow! I can do a few at-home exercises at a time, but that still doesn't count for the cardio part. I just need to make myself do it. It will help, and I do want all the help I can get!
This long healing process has really opened my eyes to what I should have been doing. I wasted all of that time! There was nice weather a couple months ago, and I had the capability of going out more often. Once I am able to workout again, I am GOING to take it slow and start getting my exercise in. Eventually once I am 100%, my New Years Resolution is to work out at home or at the gym at least twice a week. I don't even want this as a New Years Resolution, but it is what I am going to label it as. I want it more as a personal change to myself!
For some reason, it seems like most people I talk to about my diet do not understand small personal goals. They don't understand why I don't eat ____ or why I eat _____. I guess a lot of people don't have to worry about food or just don't care to worry, so they don't get it! They also don't understand why I have goals set for myself. It is just how I work. If I have something to look forward to, it really helps me out. Even looking back and seeing how much I have done makes me feel better. This is why I want to work out more. Not just because it will be healthier for me, but so I can look back and not feel the way I do now! I don't want to have to look back and be upset with myself. I just want to keep moving forward & be satisfied with myself!
Wednesday, December 28, 2011
I upgraded my phone in October and sent out my mail in rebate. I was originally told it was supposed to be in by 11/18. It never came so I called a few times and they said they resent it out 11/28. I just called 12/20 and they said it was mailed out 11/29 so to check and it should be in my mailbox by 12/23. It still didn't come so I called again today and was told it was mailed out again on 12/20 when I called in. So now I should have it by 1/10. This is getting pretty ridiculous. I said all I want is the card applied to my bill. You have to use it for verizon, so I just want it added to my bill. This is getting pretty insane with all of the people I have talked to. I have all of the names and dates, but it still doesn't matter. I just get tired of having to wait all of the time for stuff like this.
My belly button is still weeping, and the Dr told me to wait another week. He said if it still doesn't seal up by New Years I will have to go back and he said he has to cut the suture out from underneath of it?? I didn't think there were even sutures in there. Ugh. I just want to be better again so I can roll on my side, go for longer walks, and bend over without having pain. I still can't wear regular pants because they ride up too much. grrr.
My fiance asked me if I wanted to go with him & our roommate to Boston for a game convention. I feel like they are only asking me so I don't feel left out. It is over Easter weekend this year. That part doesn't bother me, but it is so far away. If it was closer, I would just go for one day to see how it was. I don't know if I want to wait in lines the whole weekend. I like games, but I don't know them too much. Plus I think I will be like a 3rd wheel there with the two guys. They love that stuff a lot more than I do. I don't know what to do. They just told me last night and said I have to decide by today.
I know this stuff isn't awful, but it just is some of what is going on. I feel torn most of the time. I just want to be myself again and it isn't happening.
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
It doesn't feel like the end of December. It is the end of 2011 already! I feel like I lost a lot of time from the surgery. I just started back at work today, and I am trying to catch up on everything that was missed. I feel strange writing 12/27 as the date on everything.
My hands feel funny just from typing so much already. I haven't used an actual computer in a while now! I hope the day goes by pretty fast. I just feel like I am out of the loop every time I answer the phone!
My belly button incision still isn't healing correctly. If I bend over too much or lean a certain way too much it really stings. I have been trying to take it easy so I don't over do it!
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