Tuesday, September 27, 2011
My Dad has had a lot of problems the past couple years. He has been smoking since he was 12, and he is 63 now. We have tried to get him to quit for years, but he has been depressed and addicted his whole life. He is a Vietnam Veteran who didn't take the whole post-war life very well. He has good days and bad days. He is very bitter and stubborn sometimes.
Anyways, he had to get a pacemaker because he heart gave out. His lung capacity is only 20% (or something like that). and he still smokes. He has been rushed to the ER 4 times now because he randomly can't breathe. It breaks my heart that he is having so much trouble. He has good days, and then works on his cars, but then the next day he can barely move. Yet he still thinks he can do the work he used to. He *wants* to quit, but he just can't. Even though it has been killing him for years, he just can't do it.
All I can do is just know that I CAN do something now about my weight. I can move around, walk, run, breathe... I just try to be the best I can now. I am getting married in a year, and I really hope he will be there... I am trying not to be a downer, I am just a negative person sometimes. I see how much trouble he has on the bad days, and I want to do as much I can to help out. I try to make sure I am eating healthier now instead of just indulging on the bad foods. I know he is proud that I have lost weight in the past and that I am losing more weight now. I try to make him proud - he wishes he wasn't addicted, and always tells me to make sure I make the changes in my life NOW and not later because I will regret it.