Friday, May 11, 2012
This is the 3rd time I've joined Spark. The 3rd time that I've scrapped everything, created a new account, and started over from the beginning. Some would call that failure. Some would call that giving up. I call it learning from my past.
The first two times I was on Spark, I wasn't listening. I wasn't listening to the program and I wasn't listening to myself. I wanted all or nothing. So, I burnt out. I gave up. I couldn't keep up with so many changes all at once. I DON'T EVEN LIKE CHANGE! But I tried to do too much and got overwhelmed.
This time, I'm not. I rejoined my gym, and I'm going as I can. I have a little one now, so I can't force myself to go every night of the week. This week, I went Tuesday and I went tonight. I'd like to go sometime tomorrow, and then Sunday morning before I pick up my daughter from her father.
I'm using Fast Break. I am tracking what I eat but not focusing on it. I am just being honest with myself about what I am really putting in my body, because if I don't know what I'm doing right now, I don't know what I need to change. I haven't even met all of my Fast Break goals this week, and I'm OK with it. The one thing I need to work on the most is my water intake. That will be my focus in the coming days.
So, I haven't failed. I know the program already, so that is to my advantage. I know myself enough now to know that I need to slow down and not try to be Wonder Woman. I want to succeed, but I know that I have to take baby steps. This is not a race. One day at a time.