KELLY_SS   20,983
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Day 328: Emotionally and physically drained!!!!!!!

Friday, April 06, 2007

Am I the only one who ever experiences times when I feel absolutely exhausted, drained in spirit and mind, from all of this 'lifestyle changing'? It's like a full time job, a 24 hr a day 7 days a week job that you never get a break from. I eat it, I sleep it, I think about it every minute of the day. I ask myself over and over, what am I doing wrong? what am I doing right? what have I learned? where am I struggling? what can I change? blah blah blah .............

There I said it, that's where I am the last few days. I feel totally drained in mind, body and spirit. The slow pace of weight loss becomes so draining. I want more and I want it NOW.

I'm not depressed about it, I'm just tired. I know this will pass and in a few days I'll be back to feeling hopeful and positive and happier but this is how I feel today.

Plus I'm super=stressed right now, personal/family stuff and that doesn't help.

Tomorrow is another day ...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    Hi Kelly,
I'm going through the same thing right now. I have kind of just let loose for the last couple of weeks and haven't paid attention to anything. Just tired, stressed and worn out. I am going to start over tomorrow and get back to what is really normal. Funny to say that because the way I'm eating now used to be normal but eating healthy is really my normal now. I know better but sometimes I feel just the same as you. At least we know why we are overeating now. I have been dealing with some family stuff to and it wears me out in every way, plus it has still been snowing almost every day for the last two weeks. Today is the first day we have had sunshine in a week. Maybe warm weather and sunny skies will help.

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!!KELL!! 4/7/2007 2:06PM

    Oh yes...I know all to well what you are talking about....I am struggling everyday and losing the weight is ALL I have on my mind.....I hope you gain your inner strength back really soon....I am here for you always and you have my personal email if you want to email me there....
Love ya......................Kelly

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ZESTYLADY 4/7/2007 1:51PM

    Hey Kelly! Yep...this too is part of the totally fa-boo lifestyle change fulltime job. Want to cheer yourself up? Go read your own posts...they inspire me!

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LABYRINTH 4/7/2007 10:23AM

    I have been there, and still there on some days. The whole pursuit of constant vigilance seems to take over our life. Especially when you are working on such a big goal for yourself. The good news is that the more you work on it the more it becomes part of your everyday life, the more you can set aside and say "this is now a habit." For example, breakfast and most lunch is not a problem for me anymore. Snacking late afternoon is. Eating out and finding what I need, no longer a problem; the desire to eat out when I'm tired, and most likely to make a mistake is a problem. Look back and make notes on all the things that you have improved that are not making your life better. Concentrate on your successes. What you still need to "work on" just see as a "to do" list of more improvements you want to make. For me I get into a mentality of win-lose, black-white and there is a lot of gray on this journey. ((hugs))

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SHAWNATONY 4/7/2007 9:35AM

    hey girly... I hear ya.. I feel the same way. Want a great blog to read about obsessing? Curves and curls told me to read her blog from July 18th 2006. Her icon's on my page. Even though my thing was the scale.. it really puts all this dieting/wellness into perpective and helps to just stop thinking about it.. even if its just for a day.. or even just an hour.. or one minute..:)It takes a minute to go back that far on her blog.. but its worth it!!
Happy sat girl and Relax a bit.. and I will too!!! :)
ya know what -I just went and got it for ya.

God vs. E-ville...
So the frickin' frackin' bathroom scale broke last week.

I've named it the E-ville New Scale, or E-ville for short.

God must be trying to deal with me and some weight-loss pride, 'cause the new scale weighs heavier, so I had to accept a *gain* this week when I know I actually lost a pound.

Could it be that He would like to see me focused on more than a Monday morning weigh-in along this journey?

Yes, I know... The answer is OF COURSE!

So how 'bout I dig into His Word for 15 minutes each day? (That's a WOAM team challenge!)

God, you win! You rule my life!


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)))))))tomorrow is a new day. Do something special for you today.... even if it's just take a few mins to relax in a hot bath... or escape to a quiet park to recharge. I've felt like you too.. many times. I completely understand your feelings. Look back... make a list of your successes... renew yourself. BREATHE....

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Yummy new product, have you tried it?

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

I bought some of these today, I saw them in the store for the first time. They're called Vita Splash Nutrient Enhanced Drink Mix packets. You add them to a 16 oz bottle of water (like the Crystal Light packets).

They have a bunch of different flavors and they are targeted for specific needs like Joint Support, Fiber, Calcium, MultiVitamin, etc. They are sugar free. I got the Joint Support one which is White Grape flavored and it is very good.

If you want to see more about them, go here and click Products:

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    i am not sure if i have seen them in a store or not but sounds great.

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4NATURE 4/5/2007 10:24PM

    That sounds KUUL Kelly! Which store did you see them in? Thanks for the info, Jody

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SHAWNATONY 4/5/2007 12:42PM

    I think I have seen them at walmart but maybe not!! I will have to check themout!! thanx girl!!

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Day 326: Hitting the Wall

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

From today's 'Best of Sparkpeople' email. I need this today, maybe someone else does too:

Hitting That Big Old Wall

How to Keep Going When You Feel Like Stopping
-- By Julie Isphording, Olympic Marathoner

Just about everyone has heard of the "Wall," as in "hitting the wall." And lots of us - in running and in life - have run straight into it. Head on.

A wall is the point in a race (or in life) where you're used up. You're officially done. You feel as if you are draining away into a little puddle on the ground. Your legs don't respond to the word "go." You vow never to do this again.

Although I hope you never have a wall get between you and a goal, here are some tricks I've learned from running that can help you get over your own wall when it's in the way:

Keep going regardless

Promise yourself that, no matter what, you will press on, even if you are walking, crawling, or puttering. In the Boston Marathon in 1993, I was running so slowly to the finish that I felt like I was actually going backwards. Stay on your feet. Eyes straight ahead. Move.

Don't think

Just go. Do not dwell on how overwhelmingly awful you feel. Focus on the cheering crowds, your friends and family waiting at the finish, the cool water, the trees... anything.

Try bribery
Tell yourself, "Self, when I get done with this, I'm going to buy you a new car, a new house, whatever you want."

Watch the negative words and thoughts. Think instead about all the successes you have had. How about all those hills you conquered? All those long workouts you endured? You are a great person. Relish those thoughts.

Negotiate with yourself
Give yourself permission to simply go to the next water stop, or to the next milestone, or even just the end of the day. Keep repeating that strategy until you see the finish line. Just one more mile before you say one more mile!

If it was easy, everyone could do it. You are the one who will make it. And don't forget the finish line pose!


Tomorrow is another day ...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

4NATURE 4/5/2007 10:26PM

    I love your positive attitude Kelly! Start each day new, Hugs, Jody

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MARY1964 4/4/2007 9:07PM

    Hey Kelly I needed this! :)

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Day 324: I know it's not a good idea but ...

Monday, April 02, 2007

I weighed again this morning - down to 261.5 == 43 1/2 lbs lost so far. I am going to work so hard to be at 255 or under by May 15th (my 1st anniv w/Spark). I know you shouldn't weigh daily but I just couldn't help myself.

WOO HOO!!!!!!!!!!

Tomorrow is another day ...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    Congratulations, y ou have made a lot of progress. I will copy your words of inspirtation regarding the wall. I am concerned about this holiday weekend coming up. However, You are the inspiration I need.

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SHAWNATONY 4/4/2007 12:46PM

happy happy for you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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LAURIEBIZZ 4/3/2007 11:48AM

    WAHOOOOOOOO!!! You can do it!

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W8TNOMORE 4/2/2007 5:46PM

    LOL Kelly...great minds think alike! There's a guy on YouTube that i watch that says he has weighed himself every day without fail. He's lost 100 lbs so who am i to say he's wrong :P

You're doing so great!!!

Love and hugs,

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Day 322: Bootcamp blues

Saturday, March 31, 2007

Well I blew it! After beginning my 10-day video bootcamp, I am so sore today, especially in my upper arms and shoulders. I think I bit off more than I could chew with a 10-day video bootcamp. lol! I'll start again Sunday or Monday with a 5-day bootcamp.

The problem is that my mind wants to do more more more but my body says 'not so fast Toots, I can't do all that yet'. If I satisfy my mind, my body fights me; if I satisfy my body, my mind says 'not good enough'. I get the reality of it, 263 lbs is a heckuvalot of baggage for this little 5'1'' body to lug around. I'm sure hoping that it will get a little easier to move when I'm a few more pounds lighter. Someone tell me this is what will happen - I need reassurance. LOL!

In other news, I had a good week and did enjoy the workouts but I think for now I need to reduce my 10-day-bootcamp-ideas to 5 or 7 days at at time. So it's not all bad, I'm still here and I'm still working at it.

Not all is lost however, I am really noticing new strength in my legs. They're still big but they are feeling so different to the touch, firmer, like I can feel muscle now and I really notice it when I have to go up steps or squat and get back up. One of these days, I'm actually going to get on the floor and see if I can get back up again because this is something I have been unable to do for probably 7 or 8 years now. And I can say this with a straight face ''body squats are my Friend''. :)

Tomorrow is another day ...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LAURIEBIZZ 4/3/2007 11:49AM

    Kind of like your bicepts??? LOL :)
Love ya!

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CITYDWELLER 4/1/2007 9:18PM

    Oh my gosh Kelly you are doing great! I'm so proud of you. I'm sure your heart is thanking you for the hard work you are doing, even though your arms and shoulders maybe protesting ")

I'm really happy for you and you need to be very proud of your accomplishment!


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ZESTYLADY 4/1/2007 9:32AM

    Hey! You are doing great! I've been where you are and can absolutely assure you that you will be amazed at what your body can do as you keep working at it...of course, I am so much taller than you at 5'3"...maybe that makes a difference (not!) LOL!

Yes...body squats are your friends, as are push-ups, lunges, and all manner of strength moves. Squats saved me from knee replacements...that's how good they are. And it is okay to adjust a training schedule to accomodate sore body parts. Just keep moving.

Best I can tell you are a tenacious, highly motivated person with good common will do this!

Keep moving!

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