KATRINIA17   39,381
SparkPoints
30,000-39,999 SparkPoints
 
 
KATRINIA17's Recent Blog Entries

10+ years later and I'm still Inspiring!

Friday, August 14, 2009

I got an email from facebook. A friend who lived on the other block and went to high school with me wanted to add me as a friend. So I did and asked what was going on back home. He sent me this message that totally made my day.

"not much I ran into some girl basket ball players at my work, and no sh!t they were talking about you, the first female on a phx highschool foot ball team. they were talking about if they get a draft pick and what inspired them...thought youd like to know."

Yep ladies, I was just as kickass back then as I am now...
emoticon

Hugs-Kat

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

REDNECKFEMINIST 8/21/2009 10:30PM

    You rock!

Report Inappropriate Comment
TLAIR0468 8/17/2009 10:56AM

    Awesome! Why am I not surprised?? You ROCK!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
GLAMOURGIRL-9 8/16/2009 11:21AM

    You ROCK Kat!!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LYNNSULLIVAN1 8/15/2009 9:49PM

    You never know where the splash from the rock you drop in the water will land.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MOM2AJAS 8/15/2009 9:09AM

    Woohoo Kat! You have truly left your mark on the world!

Report Inappropriate Comment
OPERABABY 8/15/2009 8:15AM

    LOL Girl you do kick ass, and I'm so glad your continuing to inspire!! You sure have me! Thanks for sharing! emoticon emoticon

Hugs,
Jen

Report Inappropriate Comment
KPACE7 8/14/2009 10:00PM

    Not surprised Kat. You obviously made an impression! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


DONE! DONE! DONE!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

So of course I was at my doctors appointment.

Ya'll know the drill, different doctor and yada. But, even worse, they had me in a different group so I had to not only go over the normal crap but explain EVERYTHING and I got extra "stupid" from the staff.

I'M DONE!!!

YES, I DECLINED THAT PROCEDURE AND YOU PESTERING ME LIKE A DAMN 8 YEAR OLD ISN'T GOING TO MAKE ME CAVE IN AND GO AHEAD AND DO IT!!!

I'M DONE WITH THE BULLING AND THE DAMN SCARE TACTICS!

*Please enter a string of profanity here*

So, I sit my pregnant, fat, black, incompetent, ignorant, uneducated, stupid ass up on the table of torture all so that I can listen to more bullsh!t from another condescending, egotistical, highly educated, overly paid white coat with a damn God complex.

This is my 5th pregnancy so what makes them THINK that I have FORGOTTEN what the HELL is going on here???

Yes, I know what the testing is about. I not only have been through it 3 other times but I have also been given a BOOK about it from YOUR damn clinic and have talked to 5+ other damn doctors and a bunch of random nurses along with some IDIOT receptionist at the labs about it!

Do you really think that one day I was just shoving my finger up my nose, drooling on my shoulder and digging up my ass when I SUDDENLY got the ludicrous idea to NOT do these damn test??? Is there something about me, my looks, my weight, race, something that you just catch onto the second that you see me, before I even talk, that allows you to come to the assumption that I, in no way have researched my decision, have any clue about the risk or benefits or that I have some form of lack of caring for myself of my child?

Who and what gives you the right to question me???

So here I am, like always, and I say, "No thank you, I decline."

And the response...

"Why?"

WTF???

BECAUSE I DO!!!

"Well, you tell me the risk of declining..."

Hell, I'm not the damn doctor, you tell me the damn risk of declining since you seem to assume that I don't know them!

In fact, let's start over!!!!

That little book you gave me, why aren't the risk listed in there?

Why is it that when I come in you just come on with the, "Okay and you need to take this shot and do this blood work." Wave good bye and run your ass out the door. Why didn't you give me the damn risk?

Anyone here ever have their doctor explain all the risk of involved in not doing what they say? Like right off the bat. How about this, did you get the risk of having your membranes stripped or did you just go in for a vaginal exam and did it without your consent? How about the risk of an Ultra Sound? How about the risk of getting pit after you give birth or getting cut or having forceps shoved up your twat or having your water broken? DID YOU GET THE RISK OF THAT OR JUST THE WHOLE DAMN, "I'm gonna break your water and see if we can move things along okay!"

Did any of you get the "Instant death to you and baby!!!" risk or the "Instant infection that will cause instant death!!!" risk?

NOOOO But when they do give you the risk (normally after you ask) you are told how little they are...less that 5% or so right...Kinda like the same risk that I have for declining these damn test...About 3% will develop the condition and less than that will have a complication.

But apparently there are NOOO risk of taking the drugs...none at all.

Soooo....I declined and was informed that I risk still birth. You know, the one in a gazillion chance of still birth compared to the risk of something happening if I do take the shot or do the meds or what not.

Why is it that these people have never seen a natural, un-medicated birth but have seen SOOO many of these complicated, deaths that are so freakin rare that you have a better chance of dying in a car crash or getting hit by lightening or finding a cyclops ratbunny?

I mean EVERY DAMN DOCTOR HAS SEEN IT ALL!!!

Yet, every doctor I've seen before her hasn't brought up death. The book given to me by her clinic doesn't say a word about it either. In fact, I'm having a hard time finding anything that says "death" in it except for one thing on the web that says that they are doing studies to see if the likely hood is greater but so far, it's not been PROVEN.

So, she wants me to take these test and wait for the results that should be here in about 2 weeks...I'm already 36 weeks!!! By the time any of this crap gets done I'll be freakin having the damn baby! If there is to be any damage, IT'S DONE!

STOP STRESSING ME OUT! I MADE UP MY MIND, TALKED TO THE OTHER 5 DOCTORS, READ YOUR DAMN BOOK, EVERY OTHER DAMN BOOK, WENT TO THE COMPANY SITES AND EVERY OTHER DAMN SITE, TOOK FROM MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCE AND THE EXPERIENCE OF OTHERS AND I'M MADE MY DAMN DECISION!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

So, they want me to come in at 38 weeks....

It seems that's what these fools think I'm dragging my ass down there in 2 weeks! Hell, it's going to take me two weeks just to recoup after all this crap!

I swear, I was having contractions just from listening to that woman. She herself asked me if I was okay. I left and honest to GOD I COULD BARELY WALK, COULDN'T BREATH AND THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO PUKE!

I CAN NOT DO IT ANYMORE!!! THEY WORRY ABOUT ME KILLING MYSELF DURING LABOR BUT THEY ARE GOING TO KILL ME BEFORE I EVEN DILATE A FULL DAMN CM!

I'M DONE, DONE, DONE!!!

Hugs-Kat

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GLAMOURGIRL-9 8/14/2009 10:32AM

    emoticon Hang in there Honey!!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LYNNBELTONLOSES 8/13/2009 7:18PM

    DAMN GURL SORRY TO HEAR ALL THIS. IM YOUR GURL TO DISCUSS HONEY AN GURL??? CALM THA F_ _ _ DOWN, K?

sincerely,
ya gurl,
~lynn
(yahoo im: belton_lynn)

Report Inappropriate Comment
REDNECKFEMINIST 8/12/2009 11:32AM

    I could tell you some horror stories about Dr.'s, surgeons and hospitals, but I dont even like remembering, all I can say is I found a great doctor now!

Report Inappropriate Comment
TLAIR0468 8/12/2009 9:23AM

    Well, that doctors visit sounds like about one of the worst. What the hell is wrong with people?? How many times you gotta say NO before they quit asking?? I'd be willing to bet you aren't the first one that has declined. Everyone is always saying we should take control of our own healthcare, but really, most docs don't want that at all. They want to tell you what to do and you say 'ok' and do it.

Just wanted to share this:
When I was pregnant with my first baby my OB GYN was retired Military. He had been a flight surgeon and let me tell you he was an ASS...when he retired, he left his bed side manner in the military (IF he ever had any). I left his office crying more than once and believe me, making me cry is no easy task. He actually told me I was FAT...yeah, called a preggo woman fat...wtf?...I personally think he had a death wish. lol But ya know what? I ended up not being able to have Jacob (no progress at all after over 15 hours of labor) and had to have a c section and bed side manner or not, he was an incredible doctor and I have only a teeny tiny scar (after 19 years I can barely see it) to show for my 9lb 3oz baby. He treated me so well that day...I actually felt sorry for the people in the delivery room with him, but Jacob and I were his only concern that day.

I hope your experience gets better and I hope you can have an experience with your delivery that makes all the BS you've been through a little more worth it. Keep standing up for yourself and don't let them bully you into anything you don't wanna do!

HUGS!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
VICIOUS421 8/12/2009 1:30AM

    Kat, I just have 1 question for you, now no one may have asked you this before so I am going to.... (I say as I take a big inhale, with a michievious gleem in eyes and a slight smile on face I ask) Okay Kat, are you ready for the question? (Kat glares at me not certain what I am going to ask but after the day she has had ready to give me a good dressing down if I ask 'that' question again) Are you done yet? (I ask with a slight giggle, Kat laughs too, reads over what she has blogged and realizes it does no good to try to explain your decisions to people who think they are smarter than you because they have a degree and you don't best to just say no and tell them you are not discussing it any futher with anyone because it is your body and your decision.)
Sorry you had such a rough day Kat, thought I would write a little scene to make you giggle if nothing else.
Have a much better rest of the week!
emoticon
Kim

Report Inappropriate Comment
NOMORESTALLING 8/11/2009 11:40PM

    And that is your right and perogative to say no! So stick to your guns. If I were ever in your shoes or had been in yourshoes I would want the most natural birth possible too UNLESSit was a life threatening situation to the baby and myself. But goodness at 36 weeks and that close to your delivery date and if there is no threat to you or the baby? Then why the pressure? Am I missing something here?
Stay strong girl! It's your body your life and the babies I think at this point you know what's best. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
KPACE7 8/11/2009 10:27PM

    Hang in there!! I picked tomorrow as your due date, so maybe tomorrow you will be DONE. (You got me excited with your blog title. HA HA)

I appreciate you and your new little one appreciates you!

Karen emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


ONE HELL OF A DAY !!! (hospital rant)

Monday, August 03, 2009

*sigh*

I got on the phone this morning to set up appointments for my kids...2 hours later I had them set up...for today.

I get to one place (all three were seeing different doctors...It takes about an hour to be seen and over 30 mins of waiting for meds which we never get because we have to head over to the next place.

At the next place I get stuck with one doctor who doesn't have the time to deal with anything and the other is a drag. Both of them have no right to deal with children at all.

Then I run into that idiot doctor from my birth plan and he walks by me twice and doesn't say a word...just stares at me.

Really these people won't even talk to my children...none of them did! The nurses yes but the actual doctors...NO! how the hell is it that they work with CHILDREN IS BEYOND ME!!!


So after 4 hours of doctors appointments, I end up in the pharmacy until almost 7!!! That's another 3 hours mind you. Still no food for me (missed it between getting kids ready and getting there), 3 children, one of them 3 years old...Contractions like crazy and just dead on my feet.

So I got one child with massive head lice which really pisses me off because she spent the night at a friends house and I go to pick her up and my daughter tells me that the girl has head lice...So I talk to the dad who tells me that they have been battling it for almost 3 MONTHS!!! HELLO, WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY A DAMN THING??? WHY DID YOU INVITE MY CHILD OVER???

So instantly I treat for head lice but apparently it didn't work, she has it on one side of her head only (odd) and the others don't. *sigh*

But my other DD has some form of allergic rash on her body so meds for that...

My son had about 8 warts frozen AND he has some rash on his scalp that is causing him to go BALD!!! They are clueless on what it is but are treating him for everything to see if they can keep his hair.

So I'm so upset about this when my oldest daughter tells me that she's got blood in her underpants! SHE'S FREAKIN 11 YEARS OLD AND HAS STARTED HER CYCLE RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY FROM HELL!!!

On top of that, DH had a dentist appointment for a filling in which the dentist didn't check if he was fully numb before drilling...then realized he wasn't, went off to add more novican while DH had that rubber shield in his mouth and the idiot tried to poke it through the shield to the back of his mouth...

Instead dumbass gets DH's front lip and heads towards his nose!! Dh is trying to explain with the darn thing in his mouth and idiot dentist is like "oh let me try again" and this time goes through the shield, though his lip and right above his front tooth. Finally the moron takes the shield off and gets the job done.

So I get home, sit down and dh checks the messages (he got me food while I was stuck in the pharmacy and we got home together) to see if there is a call from the hospital and instead there is a call from the landlady saying that she's coming over with a roof contractor at 7:30...it's 7:23...

The house is a mess due to me not cleaning-cleaning in this heat AND we just all got home. She knocks on the door, I have to scream at dh to get it because I'm in the middle of a contraction, she tells him that at 8 am she's coming with someone else to do a value on the house.

I'm not ready for this!! I'm pissed! We have work that has needed to be done since BEFORE we moved in and it was never done. She's so concerned about the outside of the house but we went 48 hours with no working toilet, 6 months with no working stove or oven, no screens on windows, no working dishwasher, didn't paint the house before we moved in and on top of that, we have wooden floors and couldn't understand why if something got on them and we didn't catch it within minutes, it would stain. We tell her and she tells us that the floors need to be refinished!!! So we have had a child going through spilling every thing and potty training. Anyone know what urine does to a wooden floor once it gets into it?...yeah, big black spots.

So we have like 3 black spots that WE now have to fix along with a couple of other stains (try juice and water) all because THEY didn't put a finish on the damn floor!

But hell, she just upped our rent, re did the yard, is looking to do the roof and paint the outside...forget about the broken window that her yard people broke, the mold and flooding in the basement (another reason why our living room is filled with boxes and bins) and other such things...

So, dh told her that we will be moving out and that Nov. was our last month. He figure she's trying to sell the house and had/has no intentions on telling us and we are on a month to month lease. If she was going to sell, we have 30 days to get a new place and get moved in and that's not enough for the waiting list on housing.

So, a recount:

HOURS ON THE PHONE
HOURS AT THE DOCTORS
REALIZING MY NEWBORN WILL BE WITH THE UNKINDEST OF PEOPLE EVER!!
CHILD WITH LICE
CHILD WITH BODY RASH
CHILD WITH BALDING AND HAVING WART TREATMENT
11 YEAR OLD STARTS HER CYCLE
HUSBAND ACTING LIKE BABY COMING BACK FROM DOCTORS
NO FOOD TILL ABOUT 7 PM
7 HOURS IN THE MEDICAL CLINIC
STILL DON'T HAVE ALL THE MEDS
LAND LADY NOT DOING REPAIRS
LAND LADY DROPPING IN WITH NO NOTICE
LAND LADY TRYING TO SELL THE HOUSE
DH INFORMING HER THAT WE ARE MOVING OUT
HOPING THAT SHE DOESN'T TRY TO GET US OUT BEFORE WE ARE REASSIGNED
DRIVING WITH CONTRACTIONS

I know there's more...there has got to be more...I want there to be more, just all at once, let's get it done and OVER WITH!!!

Hugs-Kat

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LISAMG1220 8/10/2009 8:25PM

    OMG-I feel for you sister. BUT....thank the Lord that it is almost over! You are in my prayers for no more days like today! Hugs-Lisa

Report Inappropriate Comment
JIBBIE49 8/10/2009 3:10PM

    To bad your husband didn't go to the Dentist some other day, and have gone with you to the doctor's appts. A man along always makes it go better, as they won't give him the Run-around.
I bet that baby comes soon.

Report Inappropriate Comment
IMTRUELYBLESSED 8/8/2009 11:00PM

    Wow! emoticon What a day. Look at the bright side; you survived it all with your sanity in tact.
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
REDNECKFEMINIST 8/8/2009 2:29PM

    OMG, God Bless you sweety, emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DESERTDREAMERS 8/4/2009 5:14PM

    OMG, Kat - you definately win the "my day sucked more than yours" contest! Some day, not anytime soon, you'll have a great "you think you had it bad, listen to this!" story to share at dinner parties. Hope the littlest one stays inside a while longer and you get some stress relief. (Or pops out soon, and you'll get some stress relief?) emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MYLIDDLEDALLAS 8/4/2009 5:05PM

    I will never complain again! NEVER EVER!!!!

Oh Rocky, hang in there ... emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ANEWVERSIONOFME 8/4/2009 11:46AM

    Woah...you had the day from h3ll!

emoticon

Although I have never been treated at a military hospital I have worked at one. Boy there are A LOT unhappy people with the care they receive in those settings. I feel for you!

I hope that everything slacks up and gets better for you!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
PEGGYSUE264 8/4/2009 11:40AM

    Kat - you poor thing! You definitely deserve a rest - put your feet up and let the day go by!!! You deserve it! I hope that your children recover quickly with their problems - you need some peace and quite! Best wishes for better days ahead!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
NGCHILD 8/4/2009 10:56AM

    Wow -- what a DAY! I mean really! You will look back at this day in weeks, months, years to come and hopefully laugh! Like Renee said -- hug your blessings -- they were stressed too!

Take care of you!!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
OHANAMAMA 8/4/2009 10:25AM

    Oh Kat, what a day!!! I've had my share of them, that's for sure. Hug all your blessings... I'm sure they were stressed too. I really hope today is much more relaxing for you. Get some rest and someday I hope you'll laugh about your horrid day out. In the meantime, I'll remember you & famiy in my prayers, hon. And I'm sending you tons of emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon ~Renee'

Report Inappropriate Comment
OPERABABY 8/4/2009 9:30AM

    Awwww hon, I'm so sorry you had to go through that yesterday. Doctors are just s**theads but it's true. I definitely sympathize with you there.

Landlady concerns: Since your hubby already said you were moving out this isn't much help...but I've threatened my landlords before with legal action according to our landlord tentant rights in Minnesota. The work got done immediately! But, I sincerely hope that you find other housing...they normally relapse at some point and it's not a great situation to be in long-term. I'm sure you know full well.

I hope today is better for you. Even if for one minute, take a breather, relax, and always remember to count the good things in life because it could always be worse!

Take care sweetie!
Jen

Report Inappropriate Comment
OPERABABY 8/4/2009 9:29AM

    Awwww hon, I'm so sorry you had to go through that yesterday. Doctors are just s**theads but it's true. I definitely sympathize with you there.

Landlady concerns: Since your hubby already said you were moving out this isn't much help...but I've threatened my landlords before with legal action according to our landlord tentant rights in Minnesota. The work got done immediately! But, I sincerely hope that you find other housing...they normally relapse at some point and it's not a great situation to be in long-term. I'm sure you know full well.

I hope today is better for you. Even if for one minute, take a breather, relax, and always remember to count the good things in life because it could always be worse!

Take care sweetie!
Jen

Report Inappropriate Comment
4EVERADONEGIRL 8/4/2009 8:36AM

    Oh wow!!! That's about all I can say. I've had days from hell also...but I think you take the cake! I don't think it's a prize you necessarily would choose to win...but you've got it! You win - you just had one of the worst days ever!! LOL

Big hugs to you and your entire family! Sounds like you all deserve a break!!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SHELLREED 8/4/2009 2:14AM

    hahahah.. LMAO.... I know that it was a really bad day my friend.. but I love that you still have the sense of humer to come home and share it with all us.. you are a strong woman my dear friend and it will get better I know .. I have been there and done that .. we never laugh till it is all over and done.. so keep that wonderful sense of fun and laughs my friend .. we are here for you !!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
VICIOUS421 8/4/2009 12:53AM

    Today must have been the day for 'if it can go wrong it will'. Sounds like you had one unbelievable day. When I was 17 and had moved to TX to live with my boyfriend (turned out to be a real jerk and I moved back home after 1 year) I babysat for a couple with a 5 year old and a baby. The 5 year old comes out of her room telling me she needs her head medicine, innocent me asks if she has a headache. No, she says with an innocent little smile, the medicine for my hair.
I looked at her hair and you could see the lice just crawling all over her head. I had never had them before and I was so angry with her parents for not at least telling me the kids had lice before leaving me to baby sit them. I almost burnt my head with hot water and other stuff when I got back to my apartment, it was too late to go to a store. I bought some stuff at a drug store the next day and didn't speak to my former friend again over the incident.
I agree with you if a kid has had head lice for months, they shouldn't be having another kid for a sleep over.
Hope they can figure out what is wrong with your son and he doesn't lose his hair.
Your poor daughter must have been embarrassed to have her first period start that way.
And poor you sounds like you need a long serious soak in the tub and a day off! Try to relax and maybe look into a midwife or another hospital if you can, your doctor sounds like a real jerk.
Maybe you will luck out with the move and get a house with AC!
Hope the rest of your week is better!
Hugs,
Kim


Report Inappropriate Comment
JANLEEW 8/4/2009 12:34AM

    OK now breathe! Lordy woman. Sit, put your feet up and just plug your ears.
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MRSJARI 8/3/2009 11:39PM

    Oh Kat!

We had head lice a while back. Walmart has a good product for it. The product is a generic thing, not a famous brand, and for us it worked better than the famous brands. It Killed the bugs. We have a family of 7, and all seven managed to get them so I understand.

I've been spending the days in the hospital, with my father-in-law not my children, and my house is going to wreck because I'm not here and the children aren't helping.

I hope the situation with the house and the doctors and all get settled soon, and that you and your baby are safe!

Report Inappropriate Comment


I Stood My Ground!

Friday, July 24, 2009

Today I had my appointment for my birth plan.

Okay, I was set up with the head Nurse of L&D who pretty much goes over everything and passes it all on to the doctor. I pretty much got everything I wanted in my birth plan with a few changes here and there on certain things. It's all something that I can live with, makes sense to me and doesn't go against my beliefs so I'm okay with it all.

There was one thing that needed to be talked about with my provider and with the OR surgeon, both who were not available.

She said that the plan was fine the way it was, if I wanted, I could make a shorter version for each group because one section covered the L&D staff, the other covered OR staff, another covered Recovery Staff and the last covered Peds for the baby and that staff. So she said if I wanted to break it down for each group and hand that to them as a quick reference for the things that applied to just them, that is fine but as a whole, it covered everyone for my whole stay and all emergencies which she said that most parents don't do, they just cover labor, birth and the first 2 hours or so if that. I think she was impressed...at least she signed it all! LOL

Now, the only issue I had...

We brought in the head of Peds for the Recovery floor...he was a Jackass from the start.

The topic was the Lotus birth which he came in, I told him that I wanted a Lotus birth and he got the all high and mighty, "Well the risk and benefits are what we look at..." crap. Then he stopped, tried to continue on and couldn't because he was CLUELESS and had no idea what it was. So I had to explain it to him. By this time I'm a bit irked about how he came out with the whole "we can't do this" mind frame and yet had no clue what-so-ever about what I was talking about and the such. I offered to send him links, emails and references and his reply was, "You can do whatever you want but you aren't doing it in this hospital."

And he crossed his arms.

Even the L&D Nurse was shocked. It was just nasty and rude. He then went into using every fowl nasty word to describe what he thought I was doing: Rotting, rotten, disease infested, fowl smelling, disgusting, inhumane, and on and on. He then went into the "risk" and I asked how high the risk was and he said he had no clue but there was one and he wasn't going to chance it no matter how little it was.

I wanted to retort with how many other things they do that have a risk to them, no matter how low that risk may be, but they do it anyways. But, I bit my tongue and let him rant away. He said he give me one to 2 hours before he cut.

I'm up in the air about this. Dh doesn't want to do the Lotus birth and I really want to do placenta art and think that the best way to do it would be if I didn't do the Lotus birth. I put the Lotus birth in my plan because hey, I may want to keep with it and just do the best I can on the terms of placenta art. In short though, it should be my choice and if I don't have it there and want it, then I kinda miss my chance. I figured I put it in, I can always change my mind later right?

But what upset me was how he came at me! I mean I went into how this was my religious belief and spiritual belief and all and he was pretty much like "Well it's nasty disgusting and I can't believe you would even consider it." Then he treated me as if I was attempting to harm my own baby! I would never say anything to anyone like that about something that was their religious/spiritual belief even if I didn't agree with it. He could have said, "Well sorry to say, it's against hospital policy and we can't allow it here but you may be able to find another hospital that can accomendate you" But, "You can do what you want but not in this hospital!" with the whole crossing of the arms and all...that to me was just rude. He could have given his reasons why he didn't not want to do it but to rag on and on about it being in his opinion disgusting, fowl, sickening and yada...not cool. I don't believe in eating certain foods or doing certain religious things but I never go on and on in front of that person and rag and rant about how I'm so sickened about their religion or cultural belief.

After he did that it opened up the flood gates of who he truly was. I heard about how because I didn't get my RH neg shot and all, "Well, that baby is going to be in the hospital with out a doubt for sure." and there were a few other things I had to hear from him which were all snarky and down with the arms crossed and a roll of the eyes.

Oh, for the eye drops (this is a good one) he leans back and says, "You know that's against the law don't you?"

The nurse tells him that I've done my research. And he continues on to tell me that it's against the law and he hopes that I'm ready for any action that may be taken against me and gives a quick smirk. The nurse just turned her head.

I ended the conversation on my own, asking what hours he worked the floor and when his replacement came on. I think he got the point since he didn't even bother to shake my hand or smile when he left.

I told the nurse that due to my last experience there I was afraid that I would be too defensive, offensive or hostile. Her reply, "No, it wasn't you.YOU were fine."

I asked her about the "Law and action" that would be taken against me and she told me, "Ignore that." she then lowered her voice and said that I have to consent, there's a reason why I have to sign a form against it and "And it's not like how he put it, no one is going to come for you and take you away or charge you with anything."

She then gave me her card and said that I needed to call her, any questions, anytime, even if I just needed to talk. She said that this time around she wants it to be a way better experience than last time so whatever she can do, she's willing to do it.

I think she really understood me because at one point I told her about how I had gotten all the "Well if you don't get the eye drops and yada, child services will come" stuff. I said that I found that they use the threats and such to do it and informed her how they went ahead and did everything last time against my wishes. She looked at me like, "Really???" and then right there in front of her he pulled the "You know it's against the law, are you willing to face any charges?" deal. I think she was shocked that he even pulled that!

So, all in all, I'm happy. In fact I thought that it was going to be much, much harder.

But I've also learned in the past that what they say and what they do are totally different and that's not just for me, that's for everyone. If it wasn't true, then we wouldn't need Doulas and support persons to help enforce our wishes right?

Hugs-Kat

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

REDNECKFEMINIST 7/26/2009 5:14PM

    Keep to your guns

Report Inappropriate Comment
ANEWVERSIONOFME 7/24/2009 10:45AM

    Good for you on standing your ground!

I hope your birth plan turns out perfect and is just the way you want it!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TIFFWINTER 7/24/2009 10:18AM

    Gosh. I'm so sorry you even had to put up with that jerk. But happy at the way you handled it. Hang in there and stand firm to what you believe!!
emoticon
Tiff

Report Inappropriate Comment
TLAIR0468 7/24/2009 10:14AM

    Good for you for standing your ground! What an @ss!! I am glad you have at least one person who 'gets' it and has your back. Good grief...why do people have to be such jack@sses and make things so much harder than they have to be???!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
AMALIA8 7/24/2009 10:12AM

    Wow....that guy was a.....jerk for lack of a stronger word being allowed to be used here. I hope that they do follow your wishes and I think that the head nurse will help enforce it for you. She seems to be on your side. I would talk to his replacement though for the other guy. :) Keep on fighting and things should go your way! Keep up the great work!

Report Inappropriate Comment
ANDIHALLI 7/24/2009 9:26AM

    Good for you Kat. Stick to what you believe in.
Yes they do do things against your wishes.
Doctors! Honestly!
They think they are all that and a bag of chips!
The fact that he tried to make you feel less than because you are strong, intelligent and well read. Shame on him!
I guess he is not opened minded, and is irrogance is overwhelming.
At least you have support from the nurse.
Sorry you had to go through something like that.
Hugs!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DOLLYBABE57 7/24/2009 5:53AM

    Kat. SS that that fool was like that. I have not kept up on any of the new birthing things would it be to much trouble to e mail me I want to know all about the lotus and that art thing with the placenta and whats the deal about Eye drops. thank you Hon. Good Luck

Report Inappropriate Comment
DESERTDREAMERS 7/24/2009 1:42AM

    Good for you, Kat. I have no idea what the Lotus is, but you obviously have researched it well. Are you military? The A-hole should be reported, written and verbatim as much as possible, and hopefully, with the L&D nurse's written report also. Even if he & you are not military, there should be a reporting mechanism in place.

Stick to your guns and DON'T sign consents for anything you don't want - that's why they call them "informed consent" - permission to do something that you have been informed of benefits and possible hazards of.

Report Inappropriate Comment
VICIOUS421 7/24/2009 1:21AM

    Wow that guy sounds like a real A-hole to me and a very confused control freak. Sorry you had to have such a lousy exprience. I would like to say he was an exception to the rule but unfortunately I am afraid a lot of doctors and other medical professionals can be that way, I have had mostly good experiences with nurses but even had 1 or 2 of them with that type of attitude, probably from having to deal with doctors and others like that all the time.
Hope everything works out like you want it too.

Report Inappropriate Comment


I Stood My Ground!

Friday, July 24, 2009

Today I had my appointment for my birth plan.

Okay, I was set up with the head Nurse of L&D who pretty much goes over everything and passes it all on to the doctor. I pretty much got everything I wanted in my birth plan with a few changes here and there on certain things. It's all something that I can live with, makes sense to me and doesn't go against my beliefs so I'm okay with it all.

There was one thing that needed to be talked about with my provider and with the OR surgeon, both who were not available.

She said that the plan was fine the way it was, if I wanted, I could make a shorter version for each group because one section covered the L&D staff, the other covered OR staff, another covered Recovery Staff and the last covered Peds for the baby and that staff. So she said if I wanted to break it down for each group and hand that to them as a quick reference for the things that applied to just them, that is fine but as a whole, it covered everyone for my whole stay and all emergencies which she said that most parents don't do, they just cover labor, birth and the first 2 hours or so if that. I think she was impressed...at least she signed it all! LOL

Now, the only issue I had...

We brought in the head of Peds for the Recovery floor...he was a Jackass from the start.

The topic was the Lotus birth which he came in, I told him that I wanted a Lotus birth and he got the all high and mighty, "Well the risk and benefits are what we look at..." crap. Then he stopped, tried to continue on and couldn't because he was CLUELESS and had no idea what it was. So I had to explain it to him. By this time I'm a bit irked about how he came out with the whole "we can't do this" mind frame and yet had no clue what-so-ever about what I was talking about and the such. I offered to send him links, emails and references and his reply was, "You can do whatever you want but you aren't doing it in this hospital."

And he crossed his arms.

Even the L&D Nurse was shocked. It was just nasty and rude. He then went into using every fowl nasty word to describe what he thought I was doing: Rotting, rotten, disease infested, fowl smelling, disgusting, inhumane, and on and on. He then went into the "risk" and I asked how high the risk was and he said he had no clue but there was one and he wasn't going to chance it no matter how little it was.

I wanted to retort with how many other things they do that have a risk to them, no matter how low that risk may be, but they do it anyways. But, I bit my tongue and let him rant away. He said he give me one to 2 hours before he cut.

I'm up in the air about this. Dh doesn't want to do the Lotus birth and I really want to do placenta art and think that the best way to do it would be if I didn't do the Lotus birth. I put the Lotus birth in my plan because hey, I may want to keep with it and just do the best I can on the terms of placenta art. In short though, it should be my choice and if I don't have it there and want it, then I kinda miss my chance. I figured I put it in, I can always change my mind later right?

But what upset me was how he came at me! I mean I went into how this was my religious belief and spiritual belief and all and he was pretty much like "Well it's nasty disgusting and I can't believe you would even consider it." Then he treated me as if I was attempting to harm my own baby! I would never say anything to anyone like that about something that was their religious/spiritual belief even if I didn't agree with it. He could have said, "Well sorry to say, it's against hospital policy and we can't allow it here but you may be able to find another hospital that can accomendate you" But, "You can do what you want but not in this hospital!" with the whole crossing of the arms and all...that to me was just rude. He could have given his reasons why he didn't not want to do it but to rag on and on about it being in his opinion disgusting, fowl, sickening and yada...not cool. I don't believe in eating certain foods or doing certain religious things but I never go on and on in front of that person and rag and rant about how I'm so sickened about their religion or cultural belief.

After he did that it opened up the flood gates of who he truly was. I heard about how because I didn't get my RH neg shot and all, "Well, that baby is going to be in the hospital with out a doubt for sure." and there were a few other things I had to hear from him which were all snarky and down with the arms crossed and a roll of the eyes.

Oh, for the eye drops (this is a good one) he leans back and says, "You know that's against the law don't you?"

The nurse tells him that I've done my research. And he continues on to tell me that it's against the law and he hopes that I'm ready for any action that may be taken against me and gives a quick smirk. The nurse just turned her head.

I ended the conversation on my own, asking what hours he worked the floor and when his replacement came on. I think he got the point since he didn't even bother to shake my hand or smile when he left.

I told the nurse that due to my last experience there I was afraid that I would be too defensive, offensive or hostile. Her reply, "No, it wasn't you.YOU were fine."

I asked her about the "Law and action" that would be taken against me and she told me, "Ignore that." she then lowered her voice and said that I have to consent, there's a reason why I have to sign a form against it and "And it's not like how he put it, no one is going to come for you and take you away or charge you with anything."

She then gave me her card and said that I needed to call her, any questions, anytime, even if I just needed to talk. She said that this time around she wants it to be a way better experience than last time so whatever she can do, she's willing to do it.

I think she really understood me because at one point I told her about how I had gotten all the "Well if you don't get the eye drops and yada, child services will come" stuff. I said that I found that they use the threats and such to do it and informed her how they went ahead and did everything last time against my wishes. She looked at me like, "Really???" and then right there in front of her he pulled the "You know it's against the law, are you willing to face any charges?" deal. I think she was shocked that he even pulled that!

So, all in all, I'm happy. In fact I thought that it was going to be much, much harder.

But I've also learned in the past that what they say and what they do are totally different and that's not just for me, that's for everyone. If it wasn't true, then we wouldn't need Doulas and support persons to help enforce our wishes right?

Hugs-Kat

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PARTICLEGIRL22 8/4/2009 11:19AM

    Wow! Good for you for maintaining your composure. I would have broken down and started sobbing. I really really hate doctors as the ones I deal with (I work in healthcare) seem to have these God-Complexes and never try to see any side but their own. This is especially common when it comes to birth. All they care about it not being sued.

Way to go for standing your ground and making it clear that you would not be intimidated by him. I hope you get the labor and delivery YOU want, not what some male doctor who doesn't even have the right parts wants you to have.

Report Inappropriate Comment


First Page  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 Last Page