Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Okay, this is my original excerpt for this years NANO. I'm...okay with it...I guess that's the phrase. I really don't think that the scene gives the reader enough information about the book or a clue as to what the setting, tone, voice or anything for that matter is. I think that it's overly flowery, compared to the rest of the work. I seem to be pretty good with dialogue and not so much with setting so this was an early attempt at getting setting before I realized, "Hey, this is NANO, don't worry about editing and getting it right, just worry about getting it written." .
But, here is a section. I will try to shift through the chapters for better sections. Maybe some that give some of my favorite dialogue! Whoo Hoo!
Hope you enjoy!
(Fragmented Evidence-Chapter One-Last scene)
Tears trickled down her face, branching out across wet cheeks, running into smears of thickening blood and vomit before thinning out to the cracked corners of her mouth. Her jaw shook as her lips formed words, mouthing a cry for help. A wide streak of red made its way from her nose, stopping on the edge of her upper lip which quivered, splattering blood through the air.
What past her upper lip overlapped and swirled into clear saliva before dribbling, falling from her mouth, adding to the pool of slick vomit and coagulating blood. Arms stretched flailing about, finely mixing the salt, the sour and harsh liquor into a medium that her fingers, unknowingly painted circles in, as she desperately sought a way out. The fear of death, as cold as the winter wind gust of upstate New York, whipped through her body before the warmth of exhaustion proceeded to over whelm the dull pain that made its way through her.
Suddenly her attacker stood up, letting go of the grip, and sending her partially suspended body crashing, her chin smashing, point first, before her forehead bounced off the tile floor. Tighten skin from her previously distorted face splintered and exposed living tissue. She laid there, eyes closed, sprawled in the contents from her stomach, not wanting to move, waiting and listening to the sound of foot steps and a door as it closed, sending deafening echoes through the floor.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
This here is one of my favorite pieces I've done. It is my first attempt at a monologue and it is done in my favorite style, "First thought". It is an Ode, another first for me, to one of my favorite actors, Mr. Vincent D'Onofrio. I actually did this piece during an inspirational writing phase (some may remember that crazy time a couple of months ago.) and it means a lot to me and my NANO writing since my main male character has been inspired by Mr. Vincent D'Onofrio's Law and Order Criminal Intent character Detective Robert Goren and Mr. D'Onofrio himself (along with a bit of my own imagination...oooh la-la.). This piece also was done after stepping away from poetry and fiction and turning instead to non-fiction and inspirational pieces so this a re-entrance into what I normally find myself doing. At the same time, it is very different from my normal writing. While it is first thought and I do write what comes to mind (with no fear or shame), I do feel that this piece has more passion to it. The tone, voice and style of the piece seems more mature compared to my earlier pieces and I feel this shows my growth over the years as a writer. Though editing and revising is always needed, I am very happy with what I have here.
So here it is, a raw form, no fear and no shame... my ode.
I love the fact that Vincent DíOnofrio is a man of intrigue and passion. The actors' actor, the theater actor, the character actor is what I call him, a man whose mind is always dissecting the inner emotions of mankind, eyes that not only see the emotion but give the emotion, feel the emotion. I love it when he looks at me with those, brown, brown eyes. I know you say, ďHe is not looking at you,Ē but he is. He is emotionally feeding me with those eyes, dissecting me with his mind, and when he moves his lips, he is reading me, the inner parts of me. Smiling with his eyes closed I am moved by Private Gomer Pyle and when Guy looks into the camera in pure orgasm, I can not help but to be intrigued by those eyes.
He is a man, six foot four, and it is all about his hands-- sizable and vigorous hands, libidinous and strong, hands that cause me to, in my mind, straddle this man who sits in the midst of embarrassment, humble and shy, each hand cupping my breasts as he speaks clearly in that oh-so-softened voice of his. And, though Iím intrigued by his mind, the knowledge of his fear of intolerance, his guilty pleasure of sex, the thought of spending an afternoon wrapped in his arms, cheek to cheek, reading, and listening to the "Sexual Healing" of Marvin Gaye, I still allow myself, a woman of intellect, to become womanized, intrigued by the passion of this man and the notion of the arrogance of his cock.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Book 1, Book 2, Book 1...wait...
Okay so here is the deal...the long story, not gonna lie, it's never short so I'm coming out with it...the long story.
One day decided to co-write with a buddy, wrote a scene, the project fell through, people said write more...I had a vision.
Some how the scene of a murder turned into a novel. The issue...
The novel turned into a series. The issue...
I've never done any of the above so I'm totally winging it.
Okay so it's all about this detective right, he's abused as a child, can't keep a relationship...yeah, same cliche story we all have heard...how does broken down so- and -so find love...gag!
But there's like huge twist in this...but it start's way in the middle...around book 3. So book one and 2 are like a reg. story...get to know the character and the plot...books 3 and 4 are a climax and book 5 is the resolution...
Well, when broken down book by book like that...what keeps the reader reading...there's nothing really there. But I broke them down because I'm looking at 500+ pages if I start combining!...I mean already both book one and two are sitting around 300 pages and that's on a basic frame structure, none of those little details and what not. I'm guessing I can reach 350-400 easy! Yikes...put together that's almost 1,000 pages long. No one would read that unless it was SWEET!
But remember, it's the intro to a bigger story, not a lot going on to it so 850 pages of getting to know someone with no real major events is going to drag a reader down.
So, I'm thinking...I have to combine book 1 and 2 back together....
My combine total for both books could be between 150,000-160,000 words or could go over. Think...430-550 pages...
That...is ....a lot...of...editing.
On other news, I go to the doctor tomorrow! Just a normal exam. Hopefully I won't freak out.
The writing has been keeping my mind busy.
Ps. My water intake has increased! WOO HOO ME!
hugs and kisses-kat
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Little pink toes
sit in ice cold water
glistening and shining
in the sun light.
Swaying back and forth
in the clear sparkling streamlet
dancing near slimy scaly fish
and green glossy frogs.
Grabbing stringy plants
and the smooth wet pebbles below,
rubbing against the rough surface
of the sandy floor.
Lifted to the sky
towards the yellow glowing sun,
with its sweet warmth
Little pink toes
drip little drops of rain
that scatter and splash
back down below.
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