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Case of the Humbugs

Tuesday, December 15, 2009


"Darkness is cheap, and Scrooge liked it."
--A Christmas Carol, Charles Dickens

Last weekend was a test of my Christmas spirit for sure. I was so excited about getting our tree! Yes, we are "real tree" people. After scouring the lot for 10 minutes, the DH had to choose an 8-footer for our one-bedroom apartment. So we shoved the thing in our trunk and drove it home, dragged all of our Christmas decorations from the basement and got to work. Even the kitty got excited!



My husband's family gave him an ornament every year for the tree. It's such a cute tradition that we want to pass on to our own children once we have them. His family also has a tradition of putting as much crap on the tree as it can hold. Tons of twinkly lights, baubles, garland, tinsel, and ornaments. So here was the end result:



I then decided what's a Christmas tree without presents to put under it? We finished most of our shopping on Saturday, so I set to work wrapping the presents under the pretext that it'll be one less chore to do when the big day approaches. We have a string of Christmas celebrations: Christmas Eve at my Sicilian relatives' home (seven different kinds of fish!), Christmas Day at my Greek dad's house (lamb!), and Boxing Day at our apartment so that we can cook all the English foods that my DH loves. Getting the chore of wrapping out of the way would be a huge relief.

Two hours later, I was done, and wrote some cards, and decided to take a little snooze on the couch while my husband watched football.

Thunk.

I woke up to the tree being inches from my head on the coffeetable. Glass everywhere and water all over those presents I had just lovingly wrapped. I freaked out, I'll be honest. And it wasn't pretty. So much for being ahead of the game this Christmas! Poor kitty had been sleeping under the tree and was rudely awakened but she was not hurt. DH swept while I tried to salvage the presents (the gifts were OK, the wrapping not so much!).

By the time we were done, it was 11pm and I was exhausted. The house was still a mess, and I realized how much time and effort Christmas was taking. Work has been busy lately and my own business has picked up and on top of that we have so many extra chores. I started to metamorphasize into Mr. Scrooge, pictured above. I went to bed after we righted the tree and was awakened by another thud. It fell again!

Thankfully, only one of the "sentimental" ornaments was broken, but still, the falling tree really represented my falling Christmas spirits. More sweeping, more vacuuming, and finally we leaned the tree against our wall until the next day until we were able to decorate it again, weighing the back down with all those now-useless law textbooks from my past.

As of this morning, the tree was OK. I snapped at my husband a bit for snoozing the alarm so many times and proclaimed that Christmas was more trouble than it was worth. Full on Ebeneezer there. Then it dawned on me that I was scared to death to do the 30-Day Shred in the living room lest all that jumping disturb that delicate tree balance we have established. So what does that mean, no more 30DS til Epiphany? The thought of that really bummed me out. I had the idea to drag the laptop to the kitchen and do it there (it's a really small apartment), but the thought didn't necessarily appeal to me.

So I walked to work this morning and decided to treat myself to a Cosi Everything Bagel (seriously, if you're going to carb-load your morning, you might as well do it with a freshly baked bagel) and seriously saw a group of carolers on the streetcorner singing my favorite Christmas carol, Carol of the Bells. I stopped for a bit and listened and smiled and gave them some money for their charity. I love Christmas music.

Despite all its annoyances, Christmas really is a wonderful time of year.

Perhaps there is hope for Christmas spirit after all.

"It is a fair, even-handed, noble adjustment of things, that while there is infection in disease and sorrow, there is nothing in the world so irresistibly contagious as laughter and good-humour."
--A Christmas Carol, Charles Dickens

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BETT2U 12/16/2009 12:37PM

    I have been quite snappish myself. I love love love Dickens--have you been to his house near Russel Square? Anyhow, let's quit stressing and get our "fit" on. I am glad that you met those carolers!

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CEESNOW 12/15/2009 9:09PM

    We always ended up positioning the tree against corner where we would then tie it to the wall in the back LOL
We have a fake tree now only because of all the needles when the season was over LOL that was our Grinch moment one year when we were literally cleaning the needles from the heating vents in July!


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ITSHOWYOULIVE 12/15/2009 8:02PM

    Sorry, just like KGRIMES (who co-winky-dink is my sis) I had to laugh!! I have never encountered a tree that refused to stand up!! At least you got to put all those old books to good use!! I am glad that the holiday spirit was able to withstand the adversity of your naughty tree. And BTW I had strawberry cream cheese on my everything bagel-I decided I might as well blow the whole morning and be good for the rest day!

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4EVERADONEGIRL 12/15/2009 1:52PM

    Okay, I'll apologize right from the beginning for laughing at your tree falling over not once, but TWICE!! Yikes!! But now that I have the little giggle out of my system I can continue on...and trust me even though you aren't laughing about it now, in years to come you WILL laugh over the tree that refused to stand up!

I have so been where you are at...well, minus the tree, but you get the point. Last year I blogged about how I was feeling rather Grinch-ish...and what song actually came on the radio WHILE I was blogging...You're a Mean One Mr. Grinch! Talk about irony!

Carol of the Bells is one of my favorites too...and how lucky you are that you get to hear carolers on your way to work! Glad that you haven't let a little bit of adversity suck all the Christmas spirit of ya! But then again...just look at your determination every day! You are sooooo inspiring in ALL you do - even the things that don't work out quite as planned! :-)

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GRACEISENUF 12/15/2009 1:32PM

    Oh geez....I would have been ticked to the max. We have a fake tree cuz I got sick and tired of leaning/falling ones. I plug in a pine scent thingy from bath and body and it works for me. It's 7 feet tall and with all the stuff piled on it, it looks pretty darn real.

The bagel sounds wonderful!

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ADKBOUND 12/15/2009 1:31PM

    I had my own Scrooge moment with the artificial tree(allergies). The whole top section of the the pre-lit tree would not light. Apparently there was a power surge and it blew every bulb in the top half of a 7.5 foot tree with a thousand lights. Sounds like a great tree until you think where can I even buy that many bulbs? and would it be cheaper to take off the prestrung lights and just put regular light sets on it? It was cheaper to put whole new light sets on the tree. At least there was no broken glass or water. I still love the house decorated and would probably do more outside if the dogs didn't chew everything in sight. emoticon

Comment edited on: 12/15/2009 1:33:05 PM

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STINA6584 12/15/2009 1:12PM

    That sucks so much that your tree fell over. On the bright side, at least you don't have carpet. We had a real tree fall over in the carpeted basement several years ago, and it was a total nightmare to clean up because the carpet was soaked and there were glass shards embedded in it!

I don't know what kind of tree stand you use, but get a metal one like this:
http://www.amazon.com/Jack-Post
-95-6464-Steel-Stand/dp/B001AZH
AI4/ref=sr_1_9?ie=UTF8&s=garden
&qid=1260900514&sr=1-9.

They seem to be, far and away the most stable kind of stand. The year our tree fell over was the one year we used one of those plastic stands that hold like a gazillion gallons of water. I picked one up a metal stand at Menards for like $12.

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LADYSNOWFALL 12/15/2009 1:07PM

    Usually, I feel Scrooge-ish during the holidays. Maybe it's because my birthday is very near and usually gets over-looked? Or maybe "Happy Xmas, Merry Birthday" gifts never left me feeling "special" as everyone should on their birthdays? Anyways, I usually have ZERO Christmas spirit.

But, not this year! I am actually, for the first time in 18 years (and I'm only 33, soon to be 34) looking forward to Christmas. My whole entire attitude towards Christmas has changed.

Oh, and just a little tree-tipping tip: Take a piece of twine and either two small hooks or two nails in the wall on each side of the tree and pin the tree back, with the twine running across about 2' down from the top. This will keep it from toppling over again. Not the prettiest, but it gets the job done. If you place the nails strategically closer together behind the tree, so that they aren't obviously showing from behind, it may not be very noticeable at all.

Good luck with keeping your tree upright!

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MYMONSTERSX3 12/15/2009 12:23PM

    I think you handle yourself pretty well through it all and WOW! I loved your blog, no matter what you seem to have it all right now. Best of luck with your tree.

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SLIMMERJESSE 12/15/2009 12:08PM

    Very cute blog. Thanks for sharing.

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SEATTLESIMS 12/15/2009 12:03PM

    ugh!! to go through all that work and have to start over decorating and re-wrapping!!
Good thing tomorrow is another day, and you found some lovely Christmas music to lift your mood!!
Sounds like you have some wonderful Christmas plans, so enjoy!!!!


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WISLNDR 12/15/2009 11:59AM

    The longer I live, the more I realize that things are just that: things. Oh, you wish they wouldn't break (like the inherited china serving tray that's waiting to be repaired) but in the end, all that's really yours to keep is love. The love of family and friends, memories of happy times, the anticipation of the good things that are ahead.

Now that I think about it, you can have the Christmas spirit every day!!

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RAINTHIEF 12/15/2009 11:41AM

    It is a crazy time of year but I think that is part of it - the frenzy and those small moments where you can take a moment to breathe and enjoy it. Glad the tree is steady once more and that you and the kitty were not bludgeoned. We have stuck to a basic lighted garland on our mantle instead of squishing a tree into our tiny place. Besides, I would have to throw the dumbbells and stability ball somewhere to put the tree up. =) I could just dangle lights off of my weights.

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CAROLYN1213 12/15/2009 11:38AM

    I love that your Christmas spirit did not get smashed all together when the tree fell, and was resurrected with the singing of your favorite carol. Life is sweet, if we allow it to be enjoyed and savored. Drink in the holiday spirit and keep brushing off those humbugs!

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FLORIDASUN 12/15/2009 11:34AM

    Oh my gosh...your yesterday sounds like my last Saturday...I couldn't catch a break if I was flying! Sooooo sorry...what a major HASSLE! Thank goodness you lost only one precious memory! I'd be getting one of those mega stands that support the tree from 40 sides...(slight exaggeration) emoticon

Thank goodness you recovered and little kitty didn't get smushed! Nothing like Christmas carols and a bagel to snap you back into good spirits...enjoy for now..remember we've got that big serious challenge coming up in January...what a hoot...me running emoticon and you RAW... emoticon emoticon emoticon now doesn't that just conjure up a picture...I hope it makes you smile! emoticon emoticon Hugs sweetie pie! emoticon

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PINKCOCONUT 12/15/2009 11:18AM

    CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!! Don't let it get you down, hon! You're going to have an awesome week next week and will laugh at this next month! Christmas IS worth the trouble! :D

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ONLY_AS_HIGH 12/15/2009 11:15AM

    First, I am really glad I sold all my old textbooks each semester!

But yeah, sometimes those trees can be a pain in the butt! Mine is currently shedding needles everywhere despite my overwatering of it! It's still very pretty, though, and I do love Christmas. I'm glad you got a little of that Christmas spirit back before you turned all Scrooged on us forever!

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SWAZY33 12/15/2009 11:14AM

    Oh :( I can't believe your tree fell...
TWICE! This happened to my neighbor last
year and they got those command hooks that
can be removed easily after Christmas and
secured tree to those! You can jump up and
down all you want then!
Good luck!!
(¯`v´¯)
.`·.¸.·´ Hugs,
¸.·´¸.·´¨) ¸.·*¨)Karen
(¸.·´ (¸.·´ .·´ ¸¸.·¨¯`·.


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ONMYWAYTOGOAL 12/15/2009 11:11AM

    We went to A Christmas Carol in 3D last weekend and it was outstanding! Anyway, I hear ya. I absolutely hate to do things over. Re-decorating the tree and re-wrapping gifts would turn me into Ebenezer Scrooge in an instant let alone cleaning up the mess over and over again! But, likeit is for you, Christmas music warms my heart. In the season there is nothing like carolers to bring us back to our kind and patient selves. It's a wonderful season, but it is full of challenges of all kinds. I hope your tree stays up, that you get to do your 30D shred, and that you enjoy the holidays thuroughly!! emoticon

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Succumbed to the Holiday Spirits

Friday, December 11, 2009

As I mentioned yesterday, my office building had a holiday party from 2-4 pm in the lobby. I figured I'd go down, maybe get something sweet and come back upstairs to do work. WRONG. There were passed trays of chocolate mousse cups, cannolis, brownies, lemon bars, chocolate dipped marshmallows, Christmas cookies, a decorate-your-own gingerbread men. Yeah, I'll stop there, but the list goes on. I was handed a glass of champagne with pomegranate seeds and sipped that and nibbled on a brownie and a cannoli but threw 75% of it away.

Then from the corner of my eye, I spied the coffee/hot chocolate bar complete with "happiness," as the bartender put it: Kahlua, butterscotch schnapps, peppermint schnapps, and spiced rum. I had a hot chocolate with Kahlua, whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles with a mini candy cane topper. And I grabbed a chocolate dipped pretzel stick on the way out. It could have been a LOT WORSE and the hot chocolate was worth it. You know sometimes how you have a cupcake and you think, "Eh, it wasn't worth the 200-300 or whatever calories." This hot chocolate was fantastic. So I estimated I blew about 400 calories at the party.

Then three of my coworkers ended the day and dressed up like Catholic priests for the heck of it. Just to see how people reacted to them drinking in the bars. So I and a few others tagged along. It was hilarious, especially when one girl tried to challenge one priest to break his celibacy vow. But of course, I knocked back a Rolling Rock and a Newcastle, came home and had some crackers and Laughing Cow cheese. Again it could have been worse. Sticking to two beers isn't so bad.

I still came in under calories for the day and did all my exercise, but I know I wasn't healthy. I'm starving today, and I started the day with a donut because the box was right in my face. Ugh. I've got to snap out of it, but I'm not going to feel guilty about it. I had fun, I didn't go completely crazy like I did in the past.

Now for some positives:
1. I'm 4.5 pounds away from my goal of 219 by the January 1st.
2. I'm burning over 3,000 calories a week and I'm on track to make my fitness minutes goal.
3. Today I mistakenly put on Level 1 of the 30 Day Shred I figured I'd see how easy it was for me after 4 days of Level 2, and the exercises that almost broke me a couple of weeks ago were extremely easy. I can feel myself getting stronger and stronger every single day!

STAY STRONG FOLKS. We're all going to have imperfect days, but just bounce back and keep up the momentum into the New Year!
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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DANCINGPENGUIN 12/14/2009 7:41PM

    This stuff is SO HARD, isn't it? the ongoing celebrations. Wow. I like the finish on a positive note; worth remembering to do that whenever I'm feeling defeated.

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FLORIDASUN 12/14/2009 8:48AM

    Hey...for criminy sakes it's Christmas after all! As long as you were AWARE of what you were doing...that IS the point right!? And, the fact that you offset those calories with exercise is SOMETHING too! Yep, you could have skipped everything but then you wouldn't even have felt like you were participating right? I give you props for reining it in!

The Catholic priests is a HOOT! Happy to see that some people still have a sense of humor..but then I'm not Catholic so I may find it funnier than some...hee hee...and breaking his celibacy vows...honey child that happened a LONG time ago..trust me! emoticon

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ONLY_AS_HIGH 12/14/2009 8:38AM

    Isn't this kind of the idea, though? That we can indulge sometimes and still stay within calorie ranges (or close) and then get back to it most of the time? I mean, this is a lifetime thing! So you don't want to deprive yourself of delicious things for a lifetime. I think you did fine. Great, in fact!

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LADYINOHIO 12/13/2009 8:27PM

    FANTASTIC attitude!!
I love it!
THAT is exactly what I'm aspiring to as well.... I am so over beating myself up over some indulgences OR letting myself go too crazy on the sweets & snackies, to the point where I feel like I've blown a day's calories!
Everytime we make a healthy decision we should congratulate ourselves, I think.
Because we sure do spend enough time thinking about the less-healthy decisions, don't we?

Have a great week ahead, I bet you'll even it all out~
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FOXXYROXXYD 12/13/2009 1:34PM

    Just began reading your blog - good stuff. I am glad that I have no major holiday parties to contend with this year because I know I would not fare well! Sounds like you did great! I am going the start the C25K program in January (working on gettting my walking speed up in December). Going to ad you as a friend - hope you do the same. Keep up the great work! emoticon
Happy Trails!

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TRAVELNISTA 12/12/2009 4:05PM

    emoticon you had me nervous I thought the calorie damage would be higher than that. I am quite sure you are back on track today. You are very disciplined and a splurge here and there for you should be no problem. I am confident you will meet your goal. emoticon emoticon

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SLARTYB 12/12/2009 1:24PM

    Sounds like it was all worth it for the taste & the fun - you behaved better than I would have done - my policy is try (at least) one of everything!

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WISLNDR 12/12/2009 12:26PM

    Ooh, you wild woman! Sounds like you did the right things! I have a party tonight and I'll take a lesson from your book. Moderation, moderation, moderation . . . .

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JMSURPRENANT 12/11/2009 2:31PM

    Sounds like you managed it well overall - maybe not 100% healthy, but still under calorie and you had a heckuva lot of fun... good for you!
Happy Holidays
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James
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RAINTHIEF 12/11/2009 2:00PM

    Mmm... hot coca sounded yummy! And I think you handled it well. As you said - it could have been worse, you could have went nuts! But you took a little of what you wanted to nibble and went along your way. I'm sure you will burn that right off! You're always movin' every time I check out your blog!

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MANDAO97 12/11/2009 1:47PM

    Sounds like some yummy spiked hot cocoa and a fun day! Sounds like you are doing a great job! Letting yourself indulge in moderation is something that helps us make this a lifestyle change that we can actually maintain instead of a diet we can't wait to get off of. 3,000 calories a week?? wow! What is your workout schedule like? I have been slacking these past couple of weeks with exercise. I am starting my broad street run training next week and I have a training plan so hopefully that will help me increase my running, cardio and ST.

Keep up the great work!

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FURBALLDTH 12/11/2009 1:38PM

    wow did you go wild! Ya need it every once in a while! You are doing amazingly on your goals. Keep it up!

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HUGMONKEYMOM 12/11/2009 12:28PM

    oooohhh Hot Chocolate with Whipped Cream...even without the happiness, I am all over that. I can't keep whipped cream in the house this time of year.

You let yourself enjoy the goodness, you didn't go over your calories, and today you start again. Sounds just about right to me.

It's days like these I'd think about what you would have done last year in those same circumstances. That is where progress is measured. And you have made a ton of it! Congrats. And Merry Christmas.

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DAPHNERUNNING 12/11/2009 12:23PM

    You are so great at turning what could be looked at as negatives into the positives! And way to go on your calorie burn!

Man, this time of year always makes me glad I don't work in an office. Too much temptation! I remember when I interned with my uncle they'd always have Happy Hour on Fridays, with margaritas and guacamole etcetera. I'll stick to the solitary (and healthy) life of a writer!

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CHICAT63 12/11/2009 11:39AM

    Woohoo by being only 4.5 pounds away from your Jan. 1st goal. Of course the holidays bring on temptations, yours yesterday afternoon sounds very delish *lol* however, you are to be proud of yourself !!!! We will surive the holidays, today is an another day. emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SPUD1226 12/11/2009 10:58AM

    Hot chocolate with "happiness" sounds wonderful
We all deserve a treat now and then.

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INSPIRED-ONE 12/11/2009 10:33AM

    You had fun and are refocused..keep up the good work!

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ONMYWAYTOGOAL 12/11/2009 10:27AM

    Congrats on your positive thinking!!! I've been having problems myself with the multitudes of treats that are appearing as Christmas draws nearer. I keep telling myself that I'm not perfect and that I'm doing so much better this year than in years past, but it's hard. There's a cookie lurking around every corner it seems. So far, I'm glad I've been able to get my exercise in every day as planned. That makes me feel better! It's the season.........that's for sure!
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PINKCOCONUT 12/11/2009 10:27AM

    You are so awesome and doing SOOOOO amazing! I am always inspired by you!!!

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CAROLYN1213 12/11/2009 10:12AM

    Sounds like a blast! And YUM!!! Pass the hot cocoa spiked with 'happiness'! LOL! Sounds totally worth it!

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FRIZGIRL 12/11/2009 10:12AM

    Great job! That is so neat to look back on the 30DS and see where you have come! And I agree, that Christmas party could have been 10X worse EASILY! Well done!

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MBSHAZZER 12/11/2009 10:11AM

    I actually think that wasn't a bad day at all! Regardless, it's not realistic to abstain from all treats all the time. Not only that, I have found out the hard way that if you avoid a lot of the office socializing around the holidays, it's a real career killer. And you can go and not indulge but that's almost worse than not going at all. So, I think you had a good balance yesterday.

The important thing to remember is that you start today with a clean slate (except for that donut! haha!) - All new food choices! Yesterday is done and gone and you can't take it back - so good thing you enjoyed it and now you can move on. Have a great weekend!

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AERINELISABETH 12/11/2009 10:10AM

    I have been succumbing myself... But congratulations on your positives and goals! It's inspiring to see that other people have problems but can still stay on track and reach their goals. Good luck!

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Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

Biggest Losers = Biggest Winners?

Wednesday, December 09, 2009

So this was my first season watching the Biggest Loser and it had its ups and downs for me. I'm blessed with the wonderful invention that is DVR and it is totally necessary to watch this program. Fast forward Bob schilling gum and subs... Fast forward any Sweeney smug moments... Fast forward when they show the same scene AGAIN after the commercial break. Sweet DVR, I think I love you!

The husband and I watched the finale last night complete with its freakish holograms and cadre of transformations. There were some good moments. Seeing Julio walk out and look like a completely different person, Alexandra and Antoine all cute and coupley, Sean's big smile, and of course how slammingly hot Abby and Amanda look right now. Unfortunately Liz and Coach Mo get my vote for those most likely to put the weight back on. They just seemed like they wanted to get the heck out of there.

Even after losing 230+ pounds, Rudy and Danny looked terrific. Danny might even be a little too thin and I hope he's able to maintain a healthy weight that works for him, even if it is not in the 190s. Antoine, Julio, Allen and Daniel all were STUNNING. Good for them.

And now onto the "loser" women.

I gotta say, I wonder if the ones who lost the most weight are the biggest winners on this show. Rebecca won the at-home prize and $100,000 (and apparently the love of Daniel, which they didn't mention on the show, bizarrely enough) but with her completely unflattering blonde moptop, her facial Tourette's and her newly skeletal face, she just seemed otherworldly to me. I mean, I'm sure she's a very nice person, but she doesn't quite look right at 140 pounds. Is that just me?

And then there's Tracey, another one with the weird facial tics and crazy eyes who was CERTAIN she was going to win the competition. She looked disgusting. Her face was gaunt, and her body just didn't look right at 132 pounds. It made me wonder if she had used some not-so-healthy tactics to reach her goal weight. Now I was on the record as saying she looked TERRIFIC in her post-elimination wrapup. Here's a photo:



Compare that to how she looked last night. I couldn't find a photo, but that ghastly image is just emblazoned on my memory right now. She didn't look right.

And then there's Abby. At 147 pounds, she looks AMAZING. She was glowing! She looked fit and healthy and ready to take on the world. And if anyone deserved a do-over, it is this wonderful woman. Shay looked great after her 172 pound weight loss. Dina (174) and Alexandra (218) looked a whole lot better and healthier than the "biggest loser" women. And Amanda at 163 also looked terrific. She didn't look like all the fat had been sucked out of her with a vacuum like Rebecca and Tracey did.

But we as viewers are supposed to believe that Rebecca and Tracey did "better" than Amanda, Dina, Abby, Shay, and other women who lost the weight more slowly. I don't know about you, but I'd rather lose the weight slowly and keep my "pretty face" than look all Halloweeny and leathery like those who lose the weight more quickly.

Skin needs time to shrink, folks, so losing over 100 pounds in a few months is going to take its toll on your body. Ever wonder why they start out shirtless and with tank tops, but later on in the show they wear T-shirts? It's because the stretched out skin has gotta look so creepy that it would discourage viewers from trying to lose weight.

The show does have great motivating moments, but it's entertainment. The average person should NOT be encouraged to lose weight as quickly as possible for health reasons, cosmetic reasons, and for maintenance reasons.

So I'll take Abby's or Dina's results over Rebecca's or Tracey's anyday. We have to remember that this is entertainment and the average person trying to lose weight should be praised for fitness and health, and not necessarily "losing."

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MICKIC3 1/10/2010 10:15AM

    I agree with you wholeheartedly....I love watching the show, but the results seem so unattainable in that amount of time. Which brings me to my weight loss after my first week here...12lbs.???? I don't know what I did wrong/right? Or if my body is just adjusting? I have a pretty active job and am not sure about how to figure out how many calories I burn daily..so, maybe that's it. And I will say I WAS STARVING most evenings this week. So any ideas, or advice would be welcome.

Sorry, didn't mean to go on about me while commenting on your post!

I love reading what you write, very motivating, encouraging, and completely insightful!

Thanks!

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LOVINGLIFE2010 1/7/2010 11:10PM

    Definitely agree! I've watched the show since the first season :)

I remember hearing the premise and thinking the show was the most offensive thing I'd ever heard of... only to be impressed that, even though the network was capitalizing on the 'reality TV' craze, the bottom line is that some people who desperately needed to change their life we able to.

I find myself watching each successive season and while I still tear up every time I see someone become the person unencumbered by weight, I'm uncomfortable with how many participants are all about breaking records.

I find it interesting to see the recent pictures of past contestants and many have a more healthy appearance as they've adjusted to real life. Skeletons be gone!



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BIKERSHARI 12/31/2009 5:30PM

    I love love love my DVR too. Lots of good points- I want to be healthy, not skeletal. :)

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PAGONA 12/30/2009 1:13AM

    What a great post. My DVR did not work so I had to go on line and watch the final and without repeating your words you are 100% right. They were way to skinny and unhealthy looking. I really hope when we see them again they will not look so bad. But look back to last years winner Helen she was the same way she was way to skinny.

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AGIRLCALLEDLUKE 12/29/2009 6:04PM

    This was also my first season watching. I also spent a lot of time fast forwarding. (I can't imagine TV without a TiVo anymore!)

I decided not to watch again in the spring, because I feel like I got everything out of the show I can in one season. And also because one of my plans for 2010 is to reduce TV time, which meant a lot of shows just had to go.

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SHYTOWN7 12/29/2009 4:34PM

  I agree 100% with what you're saying. Tracey ended up looking like another person and her body looked like she had taken up bodybuilding or had become a fitness model. I neither trust nor desire results like that. I had no idea who Rebecca was when she came out and the Brady haircut was not at all flattering for her face type. Wonder why they kept that particular romance a secret????? Thanks for your blog, I enjoyed reading it as I follow the show each season myself.

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FRISKY159 12/29/2009 10:15AM

    I so agree with everyone. Tracey looked freaky to say the least and what the heck hit Rebecca to change the hair? It looked horrible. I think that the thing to really look at is that the people that had a an obvious beauty inside (Amanda/Shay) really were beautiful no matter what weight they were at; they are now just HEALTHY and beautiful.

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CHEEKYMONKEYS75 12/28/2009 1:41PM

    I have to agree, they take it to the extreme and end up looking a little too skinny. They really are setting some of these people up for failure. I would like to see all the cast members come back, not just the ones that are doing well. It would give people a better idea of how hard it really is (like we don't already know!). And I REALLY can't stand how the show is SO produced - Jillian walks into the kitchen when they 'just can't decide what to have for lunch/ breakfast/snack' It drives me crazy, and all the silly faces they pull when the go for weigh in then commercials is ridiculous. The adverts drive me crazy.

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TANIALUCILLE 12/28/2009 11:37AM

    I agree with your comments and thoughts. I have had many of them myself. I wonder how healthy it is, but I do love the show. Then I consider the alternative, even losing the weight fast for some of these people is going to help them be healthier. I wonder what causes people to get to such an ungodly weight. I still struggle with why I want to eat when I do? Why I've become so heavy? etc... I'd feel blessed to have someone pushing me everyday for a couple months without outside distractions.

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SWEETCFO 12/26/2009 2:17PM

    You are right on point with the women of the show. I'd love to see how Liz does next season. They brought Helen back from last season and fortunately for her she did put some weight back on - looking more normal. Danny was extremely thin and it was interesting to see him battling his demons. I found a comment online that indicated because they are so over weight, they will have to spend 1 1/2 hours each day exercising for the rest of their lives - ugh. That is a lot of exercising every day. That is like a second job... Thanks for sharing. Course BL got my hubby motivated this year so I shouldn't complain too much. Can't wait to see Shay again!! I'm hoping she wins $100K from Subway!

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GINA7249 12/26/2009 1:39PM

    i had the same thought as well. i thought amanda and abby were great but i never liked tracy. she seemed to look to thin as well as rebecca. i think they got to carried away. happy danny won but i wanted shay or daniel to win. love the biggest loser and it seems that the new one in jannuary is going to have bigger people if you can imagine that. great blogging
gina

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PERSONALTRNR 12/26/2009 9:49AM

    I had the same thought that they both looked ill. I'm all for losing weight, but becoming obsessed about getting that thin is no healthier than being obese to begin with. I applaud the effect that BL has had on people losing weight but think sometimes it is taken to the extreme.

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VENGE7 12/25/2009 9:29PM

    Rebecca's hair was horrible! She was so much prettier as a brunette! I also saw her on a late night talk show the night she was kicked off and she looked sooooo good. So much better than the finale. It does kind of make me mad how they seem to pass over Shay and Dina and some of the others because they aren't Hollywood TV stick thin. It downplays their accomplishments. AND the show is supposed to be about being healthy.

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NENATO2 12/25/2009 8:22PM

    I love BL, but this season, I really didn't care who won. All the observations you made, I have made. But I'll be right back on it on Jan 5. It is amazing to me how much people lost this season and I can't help but wonder if it was heathly.

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SALONGIRL70 12/25/2009 5:20PM

    I watched the very first season and loved it. I have never watched it again. I am not that into reality tv but it was really just the new was off and I realized the show is into poundage lost in record time which is scary. I do love the videos and such the trainers and show put out though.

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ALWAYSEXHAUSTED 12/25/2009 4:24PM

    I'm addicted to the Biggest Loser. I guess I do get involved with the characters and it gives me motivation. I realize that losing weight that fast isn't good for anyone. And I know that most of us don't have 24 hours a day to devote to weight loss. But I still think they make people's lives better than they were before and they teach them healthy ways of eating, drinking and knowledge about their current health condition.

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EMMALOU55 12/25/2009 11:07AM

    They do focus too much on the number of pounds lost instead of healthy weight loss. I would prefer to see less cat fighting and more info to help others. Guess that is why I like SparkPeople!

Abby is my winner!

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MCCREAHD 12/17/2009 1:22AM

  I was never a huge fan of the biggest loser but I watched the whole season on hulu.com and I think I cried during every single episode.

But honestly I agree with everything you said. I was SO stunned to see how disgustingly skinny Tracy got and how barbie dollish Rebecca got! Rebecca had a pretty face when she had some weight to her, now she just seems entirely too skinny. And her and Tracy seemed really smug, with the "I'm better then you" attitudes. While the rest loved on each other and congratulated the others!


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SLKIDDER 12/15/2009 3:58PM

    I watched the Biggest Loser during the first season and they mostly focused on the infighting and other squabbles. They showed the participants working out, but hardly spent any time explaining the workout programs or nutrition goals. It seemed more like a reality show, and not really that enjoyable. Is Biggest Loser still like that?

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CEESNOW 12/12/2009 6:44AM

    I thought I was the only one who thought that about Tracey and Rebecca!! I wasn't too crazy about them anyway.
Abby was amazing! I almost didn't recognize Amanda.
I too have a dvr and love that I can skip over the endless commercials and product pandering...it seems to get worse with every season.

Yeah for the next season starting soon!

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JEN314 12/11/2009 5:18PM

  I sometimes have mixed feelings about the show. I think it is awesome that it has motivated so many people to take care of their health and work toward a healthy weight, but it also gives us unrealistic expectations about weight loss. Isn't the healthy goal 1-2 pounds per week? Losing 10 or 18 pounds in a week is insane! I guess that it is much better than staying morbidly obese, but I think moderation and consistency should be the valued goal. Love your blogs! emoticon

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NORAB52GOOD 12/11/2009 4:48PM

    I kept saying that I thought Tracey's face looked funny too! She looked so wierd like she'd had plastic surgery or something. Rebecca just looked like a hooker with a bad wig. Neither one looked appealing in the slightest. I agree with you completely!

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ASIAMORA 12/11/2009 2:58PM

    I do agree about Rebecca's hair. It was bad, it made her look 20 years older too.

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GYPSYLEE44 12/10/2009 10:11PM

    I admit, I have DVR envy. If I had to watch those bits twice over anymore, I'd pull my hair out. Tracy, now there's someone I could rant about. That woman looks psychotic fat or skeletal. I really didn't want her to win. Did they really need two hours for that show? I had to fight my family to switch back and forth from 'A Bug's Life' movie and BL.

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SPUD1226 12/10/2009 6:59PM

    It's good to know I'm not the only one thinking they were too thin. Maybe there should be some prize for being closest to a healthy weight instead of just largest percentage lost.

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LADYSNOWFALL 12/10/2009 4:24PM

    I have to agree that Tracey looked terrible! Her hair was looking thin. I mean thin not "I'm having a bad hair day". Also, her hair has lost it's gloss and healthy shine, which leaves me wondering if she's taken training too far. Has she gone to the other extreme, perhaps losing too much body fat?

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MOMMAROLEMODEL 12/10/2009 3:34PM

    i agree --what the heck was with Tracy's face--

and I love Abby--

Love
Timberlee

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NICOLEBA47 12/10/2009 1:03PM

    emoticon blog - thanks for sharing

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LESS_IS_MO 12/10/2009 12:49PM

    I agree with your synopsis. Tracey looked skeletal - she clearly got to the lowest body fat percentage of the whole group. I did love her totally ripped arms. I actually thought Rerbecca looked pretty good, but hated her hair and her choice of dress. I thought Coach Mo and Liz looked liked they wanted to get out, but I'm not so sure they'll gain back their weight. It's not like they got skeletal like some other past big losers. You mentioned Helen and I think she's already put back on 20 lbs from what I saw of her a couple of weeks ago. Not sure I'll be watching the show next season - fjeels like a total waste of time. I don't have a PVR - do those need cable or satellite tv to work?

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_BECA_ 12/10/2009 12:21PM

    I do in enjoy the show but reality vs fantasy losing the amount of weight that they do in such a short time NOT realistic at all! that is why so many of the contestants gain it all back then some. I think we all have to remember it is about making it a LIFETIME commitment to better health creating a healthy LIFESTYLE that will ultimately bring success. I am glad Tracy and her conniving ways did prevail and that she didn't win it. Will they keep the large amount of weight they lost off? it will be interesting to see as time passes. I know we must take it a day at a time a meal at a time and keep it REAL & DO ABLE! so that the results will last a lifetime.

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Hugs...Beca

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STEPHFERNEY 12/10/2009 6:54AM

    I wish Rebecca would go back to dark hair - she was so pretty before! I think Tracey will also put the weight back on since she didn't win - she seems to have the kind of personality that would take not winning as a complete failure instead of celebrating her weight loss and fitness regardless. The others looked really good - especially Amanda - what a knockout! I laughed out loud about "Bob shilling gum..." - I would always turn to my family - "oooh, look - product placement of the week!" We love DVR too!

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MANDORA3 12/10/2009 6:01AM

    Totally agree..Rececca acted like she was on something and Tracey looked as though she grabbed on to a bottle of steroids and used those as food!

Their results are way to unrealistic and unhealthy.

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MONIQUEV2 12/10/2009 1:39AM

    Great blog! Thanks for sharing.

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MILESABOVEME 12/9/2009 11:33PM

    I'm so glad I'm not the only one who thought that! Rebecca just looked crazy. Also, I noticed that Tracey's hair looked really thin -- a sign of someone who hasn't been eating. I agree with you --- you can tell who did it the HEALTHY way, and they looked phenomenal!

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MILESABOVEME 12/9/2009 11:33PM

    I'm so glad I'm not the only one who thought that! Rebecca just looked crazy. Also, I noticed that Tracey's hair looked really thin -- a sign of someone who hasn't been eating. I agree with you --- you can tell who did it the HEALTHY way, and they looked phenomenal!

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JDMMAMMA 12/9/2009 10:42PM

    I really had a hard time looking at Rebecca last night she seemed just a little crazy and her hair and dress were awful definitely way to thin --and Tracy I always thought she was crazy---- I completely agreed with your review! I love Bob besides his underlying advertising LOL

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SARAHF_24 12/9/2009 10:37PM

    I agree...I dont believe anyone should be made to lose weight at the rate they do on the show. I first just started watching it this season and was shocked at the amount of weight they seem to be expected to lose. I mean they'd lose 5 lbs one week and that wasn't enough?? Really?? Its not realistic. However I do love the motivation and how they get to the root of their weight problems. I was crying along with the contestants just about every episode and it really got me thinking about my weight and why its been a problem my whole life.

Rebecca did look horrible. it was almost like watching a train wreck...you dont want to look but you can't look away!

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YANNAG24 12/9/2009 10:11PM

    I totally agree with your review. Tracy definitely looked weird. Alot like helen from last season. And Rebecca hair was so not cute. But other than that I was very proud of all of them. The others looked fabulous.

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YANNAG24 12/9/2009 10:10PM

    I totally agree with your review. Tracy definitely looked weird. Alot like helen from last season. And Rebecca hair was so not cute. But other than that I was very proud of all of them. The others looked fabulous.

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YANNAG24 12/9/2009 10:10PM

    I totally agree with your review. Tracy definitely looked weird. Alot like helen from last season. And Rebecca hair was so not cute. But other than that I was very proud of all of them. The others looked fabulous.

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ANEWMACK 12/9/2009 9:12PM

    YOU m'dear..hit the nail right on the head with EVERYTHING you said! I'm so glad we're on the same brain wave!

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TRAVELNISTA 12/9/2009 8:21PM

    What a great review! You are the 2nd person to point out how thin Rebecca looked. I did not notice that because I couldn't get over that awful blonde hair and haircut. What was she thinking?

I was also very happy that they gave Shay added incentive to keep losing the weight. I hope she becomes the next spokesperson for Subway.

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TIME4AFITME 12/9/2009 7:37PM

    I agree with everything you said. I am so glad that Tracey did not win anything and she did look weird. I liked Rebecca but think she looked funny. Did not like the hair at all. Abby looked awsome and so did everyone else.


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FEFE2009 12/9/2009 5:56PM

    like many of the reviewers, i too agree with your post-- Tracey was just creepy looking and i agree that Coach Mo and Liz were just completing their contract and heading to a nice family dinner--nonetheless i love this show and agree that DVR is a wonderful tool! lol

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CHICAT63 12/9/2009 3:44PM

    I have been watching Biggest Loser off and non since the start several seasons ago. I so totally agree with most of the replies and your blog Karvy, Tracy looked sick just as Helen did last BL. Both Rebecca and Tracy’s body/skin is the results of quick weight loss and overtraining to me. Oddly, Tracy did not have much results on the ranch but once gone she did, I have to question the methods she took to get there. Honestly, I never wanted Tracy to win anything much less the $100,000 home prize.

As for Rebecca, darker hair suits her much better. Antoine was such a sweetheart proposing to Alexandra, too bad they did not mention Danny and Rebecca. Abby looked amazing she has so much courage, the rest of the gang looked great. Julio, though looked a bit too Zorro for me *lol*.

I truly admire the courage of Shay – GO SHAY GO for next May 2010 she can do it. The end results is that Danny won, Rudy is to be also admired I remember watching a couple of weeks ago Jillian was saying how for Rudy loosing and training came naturally to him being a former athelete.



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ATINSIDE 12/9/2009 2:42PM

    I totally agree! My jaw dropped when I saw tracy..but not in a good way. I was thinking omgosh she lost way too much and she did look super cute in the picture you posted. I guess that's something everyone needs to keep in mind-finding a healthy weight may not be the absolute lowest weight possible for your body!

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HOGFAN79 12/9/2009 1:34PM

    I have to agree with you!! Tracey looked so old and sick. I thought Rebecca acted more crazy last night than she did during the show. Why didn't they mention Rebecca and Daniel's relationship. Amanda, Abby and Rudy looked great. I think Danny should put just a little weight back on!!!

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AJAM00 12/9/2009 1:11PM

    I was happy for Danny. But his transformation reminded me of Eric (Season 5 winner?). I pray he keeps it off. Abby did look great and I'm just glad Tracy didn't win.


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HUGMONKEYMOM 12/9/2009 1:05PM

    This was the first season I watched it too, and I agree whole-heartedly. But, as many others have pointed out, if you can separate the tv-show from the inspiration, then it's fun to watch.

I am most inspired by the contestants who had the longest to battle it out at home and still dropped significant amounts of weight. I can't wait to see Shay at next year's finale. That will be her hard work paying off, literally, without the ranch.

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ABETTERKGIRL 12/9/2009 12:57PM

    Yeah everyone looked great and healthy. For some of them I was shocked by the number on the scale because some of them looked smaller than they actually weighed. I guess that goes to show that the numbers sometimes don't matter that much. Tracy did look sick, she drove me crazy!

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Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

Running While Chunky: A Guide

Monday, December 07, 2009

Yep, I'm still running, still a "fit fatty!"

A few months ago, I wrote a blog called "But I'm Too Fat to Run!" which is still getting so much great responses from Spark members: www.sparkpeople.com/mypage_public_jo
urnal_individual.asp?blog_id=2326373
. I want to thank everyone who's been inspired by my and others' attempts to begin a running program. When I wrote that blog, I was 256 pounds and still morbidly obese, running, and nervous about my first 5K in a month's time. I started running at 275 pounds and everyone from my friends to family (except for my wonderful husband, my rock) called me "crazy" for training for a 5K.

Now, I call them crazy for doubting me!

Over 100 days later, I'm now 225 pounds with two 5Ks under my belt. I'm not perfect. I had my weak moments: the days when I wanted to stop, when I thought I'd NEVER be able to hit my mileage goals outside, when my shins ached, when my ankles turned, and when I despaired that I would never run as fast or as long as the others on the track.

Running can be just as psychological as physical. There are times when I broke down in tears from unrelated frustrations or from unbridled joy. You could learn something about yourself just by pushing yourself.

Because I think there are unique concerns for those who start running while obese or overweight, I started a thread on my Couch to 5K Group forum called the "Fat Runners Club," a support group for runners who are starting at a weight that they never believed they could run at. You can join the discussion here: www.sparkpeople.com/myspark/team_mes
sageboard_thread.asp?board=-1x788x2780
4218
.

So what's next? Well, consider this "But I'm Too Fat to Run!" Part Two. I wanted to share a few of the tips that I and others have learned as we started our journey as fluffier runners, a concept I'll call Running While Chunky (RWC), kind of an update to my previous blog, and perhaps, PERHAPS an outline for a longer guide I hope to write. In the future, I hope to add update blogs as well.

I'm sure many Biggest Loser fans watched the final four contestants run/walk a marathon last week. Perhaps after seeing that you felt motivated to run, but are facing the doubts that are nagging you or the skepticism of your significant other or parents or friends.

Maybe you have the flashbacks back to the gym class in elementary school like I did. The 600-meter dash. The physical fitness test. Finishing last. Or next to last, like I did, right after the girl with an injury who was required to walk the whole thing. Fun times!

But you know what? Those days are over. You may be heavier now. But you are also stronger! You have come to SparkPeople to gain control over your life, and you are ontrack to a fitter and healthier you!

I am telling you right now. You can be a runner. You can do this.

CHAPTER ONE: TALK TO THE DOC
You think you're too fat to run? Don't take your own advice. Ask your doctor first. Some people will not be medically cleared to start a running program, but the great majority of people will be fine beginning a routine that eases you into running gradually in order to avoid injury.

CHAPTER TWO: SIGN UP FOR A RACE
Whoa, what? Surely you mean Chapter 17 or something. No, I mean Chapter 2! Listen, what's going to keep you motivated more than actually signing up for a race? Most road races benefit charitable causes, include slower runners and walkers, and are less competitive than you might think. So do it. If you can't run the entire race, it's OK. I wasn't ready to run the whole 3.1 miles when I signed up for my 5K. I still managed it in under 45 minutes, ahead of many other runners and walkers on the course.

Many of the runners that I know who stuck their training did it because they had a goal to be as fit as possible before their 5K. Make fitness your goal as well as a weight loss goal. Losing pounds is great, and I'm so happy with my progress thus far, but weight loss doesn't even compares to the thrill of running your first 5 minutes, half mile, one mile, or 5K. NOTHING.

CHAPTER THREE: ACCEPT IT: YOU'RE RUNNING WHILE CHUNKY (RWC)
SparkMember NORAB52GOOD said it best: "I realized I have to first be a slow, fat runner before I can be a fast thin runner. One follows the other." Well said. You're RWC; you're not going to run 8 mph like that fit chick on the treadmill at the gym. Not yet, anyways. If you lift your foot up before the other foot has fully struck the pavement or treadmill you are still running, even if this is only 4 mph or a 17-minute mile. One pet peeve about SparkPeople is that you have to be running 12-minute miles in order for SP to classify it as running and not walking. I don't believe this is true.

CHAPTER FOUR: CHECK OUT A RUNNING PROGRAM & START SLOW
I started with Couch to 5K (C25K)
www.coolrunning.com/engine/2/2_3/181
.shtml
, but there are others out there as well. C25K starts you out jog/walking three times per week, and the first week you are running for 1 minute and recover by walking for 90 seconds in intervals. It gradually gets harder and harder each week. Technically you are supposed to finish in 9 weeks, but if you are RWC, you most likely will not. It took me twice as long to finish C25K and that's OK!

Fight the urge to run longer or faster at first. Take your time. You are building up your endurance and fitness as a new runner. You will get there, but it will take time! You don't want to injure yourself just as you are hitting your stride!

CHAPTER FIVE: GET YOUR GEAR
Here is a list of the Top 3 items that the RWC suggest in order to maximize your experience while running.

1. Tight biker shorts that hit above the knee or tight spandex pants
This keeps the tummy and thighs from jiggling but is long enough to prevent the chafing that can occur when your thighs rub together when running. This is like the sports version of Spanx!

2. A good sports bra
The RWC are often very well endowed! My solution was to buy a sports bra one size too small so that the girls were pushed down right to my chest. Others have used TWO sports bras for support. In any case, keeping those puppies in check is integral to your running experience.

3. Running shoes
You need good running shoes (not cross-trainers) if you get serious about running. The difference is astounding when you get fitted for a pair of shoes. After running for a few months, I finally got around to going to a specialty running store to get a gait analysis and fitting and it was amazing. The RWC tend to overpronate (strike the foot at an angle) and stability shoes will be needed to help prevent injury. An insole insert might be a good start when strapped for cash or need some additional padding.

CHAPTER SIX: MUSIC'S IN MY SOLE
The C25K Program has a free podcast with a guy named Robert who will tell you to stop your walking and start running over and over again. It's boring, frankly. My solution to the monotony is to create your own playlist that signals when to stop and start. In the beginning you'll know that halfway through the song it will be time to start running, and soon. you might have three Blackeyed Peas songs that serve as your 10-minute running interval.

CHAPTER SEVEN: KEEP IT UP!
You might run on the treadmill and see the next marathoner plugging away and get discouraged. Or you'll be on an outdoor track and people will pass you or run longer than you. And when you start, you'll most likely have shin splints or some other minor pain. Work through it. Dispel all these doubts. If you want to be a runner, you can run. It may take longer and you may have to work harder at it than your skinny friends, but it can be done.

CHAPTER EIGHT: WORK WHAT WORKS
If you like running on the treadmill as winter approaches, do that. If you love the feel of running outdoors, then go for it. People will give you great advice, and people will maybe reach their goals faster than you do, but it's important to not become jealous of others quicker progress and give up. Have fun with it! Running can be a whole lot of fun and pushing your body to see what it can do is a fun game to play with yourself.

You will get there and persevere, and maybe someday you will wear a shirt like ZIRCADIA'S at your first marathon: "Because I used to weigh almost 300 pounds" and others will be astonished and inspired by you. That is my goal, anyways.

Happy running to all!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DIVA711 8/7/2013 11:01AM

    I'm a fat jogger/walker/runner that started at 355. I signed up for two races. I'm running the race. Determined you be fit....

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VWBUG_1967 11/8/2011 9:16PM

    I just finished my first 1/2 marathon at 202 pounds (when I started training I was 220 lbs). I was easily the largest runner there but I did not come in last and I did not give up. Your post really resonates with me and I know that will encourage others to give running a try. I've signed up for my next 1/2 marathon in April....nothing keeps me on track better than making the financial and mental commitment to a race!


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CIENZJALOWCA 6/25/2011 3:12PM

    Thanks! :)

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LETSLOSE11 3/3/2011 8:09AM

    I love your blog. I have been considering running. You are doing a great job. Keep up the great work. I will no longer consider it I will do it. Thanks.

Val

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HYLYN2 2/13/2011 12:42PM

    Thanks for sharing. I've been wanting to start the c25k program but haven't out of fear. Fear of what other people will say when they see me, fear of not being able to finish the first day. Just stupid Stuff! You are inspirational and have given me the courage to start today. Thanks so Much!

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BBBIGMAMA 2/12/2011 10:09AM

    Wow, I read the blog, then looked at the date. NEVERMIND recommended this blog to someone trying to decide if they should run so I decided to check it out myself. Very inspiring. I guess good advice doesn't have an expiration date.

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TECHGIRL22 1/24/2011 6:16PM

    Thanks for sharing Karvy09! This article let me know it's ok to RWC and that it's possible. I started in Oct. 2010 and it took me almost 3 months to finish the c25k program but I did it. Now i'm working on the b210k and signed up for 2 1/2 marathons to keep me motivated! I did a turkey trot last thanksgiving and was glad I tried it!

Thanks again.
emoticon

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EARTHTONED84 1/16/2011 10:38PM

    This is so motivational!! I loved your previous RWF blog too!

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KAZ814 6/20/2010 4:48PM

    Thank you so much for the advice! I've been alternating walking and jogging the past week (my own plan, so we'll see how I do!) and I really need to get myself to Target to get some of those bike shorts! Thanks for the tips!

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PATRICE603 6/20/2010 10:28AM

    THANK YOU for sharing this. Great tips. You are such an inspiration. Now I have no excuse for not running. I'm going to find my running shoes!

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KGIRL160 5/27/2010 11:42AM

    Just this Monday I finally said to myself, that's it, don't care if I am too heavy to run. I am doing it anyway. Many people have said to me I should just stick with walking first. I really appreciate your blog - and advise. I already wear two sports bras and I am going to order the spandex shorts! Now if I can just get rid of those shin splints... emoticon

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ERICA1212 5/19/2010 1:51PM

  I LOVE this post! Thank you so much for writing this...

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BLONDE_LOLA 5/19/2010 12:46PM

    Thank you for all the great advice.

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--CHRISTINE-- 5/19/2010 10:17AM

  I love this post. I told myself well over a year ago that I was going to get back in to running, and I have yet to do it. I used to run several races a year when I was in Jr. High. My dad was a runner, and it was my way to connect with him. I used to do mostly 2 mile races, but also some 1 mile and did a 5 K once or twice. Thanks in part to your posts on RWC, I just got dressed and will head out and see what I can do!
BTW- I wouldn't necessarily recommend wearing a bra that's too small- at least not to everyone. I'm only a 34-36 d, but I bought a 'high impact' style in a size 34c because the store did not have one in the size that I needed. I have only been doing the 30 day Shred while wearing it, and it was killing me, but I felt that I HAD to wear it! I dreaded my workout (and eventually pretty much quit doing it) b/c I hated that thing- it was cutting into my shoulders pretty hard. I just started back on The Shred yesterday, and wore a regular bra with a tight running tank over it and I have to say, the workout was almost pleasant! Almost. :) I would seriously recommend that a person finds the best fit and possibly double up if it helps.

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THESHRINKINLADY 5/18/2010 11:45AM

   
So wonderful! And I loved the chapter tips you gave! I was laughing about the spandex pants and sports bras. Sooo true!

I think this RWC blog is wonderful. I, too, have always felt that my weight shouldn't hold me back. I didn't let it hold me back TOO much growing up but as I got older (teen years and early 20s), I let my weight prevent me from trying things because everyone else told me I couldn't. Once I changed my frame of mind and started to get healthy, I realized that it was what others were saying or possibly thinking about me that was holding me back...not my weight!

When I came to that realization, I have been unstoppable every since! Chunky folks can run too and I'm living proof!

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15THC_ODETTE 5/14/2010 10:38PM

    Don't get a sports bra that is too small. Get own that is up to the challenge and is your correct size. I swear by Shock Absorber. I don't bounce and I am a 38J. They are fairly ugly, but they work. Let me repeat, I don't bounce (even when jumping up and down).

I buy mine at figleaves.com

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QUEENCAT25 3/27/2010 10:23PM

    This is very motivating! I'm gonna look for some tight spandex pants tomorrow. =)

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BRIGHTESTBLUE 2/6/2010 3:44PM

    I make my own C25K music mixes- I'm still stuck around week 2, seemingly forever (as I live in a very hilly area) but I don't think I'd get out there at all without them.

I don't know an alternative for Windows users, as I haven't touched that OS since 98 was en vogue, but on a Mac you've already got everything you need. You can drag songs from iTunes into Garageband and chop them into the appropriate lengths. I add 5-minute warm up and cool down songs at the beginning and end for a finished audio file that is around 30 minutes long. (I'm not always exact with the times, as I like to finish songs.) It does take a little time to put together, but I think it's totally worth it.

My favorite so far is probably run on Britney, walk on Bowie :-)

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KBRINEY86 1/27/2010 2:39PM

    Great advice!

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JENNIEBENNIE08 1/20/2010 10:47AM

    Thanks, I will try this. I am nervous to begin, but I have to start some where!

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JENNIEBENNIE08 1/20/2010 10:46AM

    Thanks, I will try this. I am nervous to begin, but I have to start some where!

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TCRESGROFF 1/12/2010 1:10PM

  Thank you for posting this. It is very encouraging and great for us all to know that we can do it. Even if it is slow and takes a long time to improve. We will make progress if we keep it up!

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CONTUSIONS2012 1/9/2010 5:04PM

    emoticon

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JUSTFOXXY 1/9/2010 8:40AM

    Great blog. Thanks for the inspiration.

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ERIKAYAMAN 1/9/2010 8:39AM

    Awsome post. I LOVE C25k. I did it a couple of years ago before I got sick. It was so great. I encourage anyone to try it too!!! I am planning to try it again now that I am starting on my weight loss journey again- yes, as a RWC girl at 208.


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PIERCER100 1/9/2010 12:36AM

  thanks for taking the time to write this it was really helpful and inspiring .

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JOSIMAC 1/8/2010 11:10PM

    Thanks for taking the time to post this. This is just what I needed to know to start.

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NYCGRRL 1/8/2010 6:11PM

    Great post! Good advice!
emoticon

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CDAWN26 1/8/2010 2:24PM

    What a great blog and true inspiration. I'm not much on running but I do have to say I managed to do a little on the treadmill today. Who knows?...I may be running before you know it.

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KMT1110 1/8/2010 1:50AM

    This is so great of you to write about this.....I might have stuck with running a little longer if I had read some of your ideas. I've since lost 35 pounds, so I'm not quite so chunky now, but I long ago dropped the running idea because of the embarrassment and the angst I suffered trying to run when I was 35 pounds heavier. I especially liked th idea of using the music to switch from walking to running...I was listening to my ipod but using a timer.....boring!! I might just try it again now! Good luck to you!

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BIKERSHARI 1/7/2010 4:50PM

    Thank you! It's good to know that there are scores of wanna be runners out there! :)

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PARISTEMPO 1/7/2010 9:58AM

  Wow! I would have never even imagined trying to run at my weight... and after reading this I am inspired! Not sure if I have the guts to try for a 5K... but I am going to try the couch to 5K program you cited for my cardio workouts, and who knows... Thank you!

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CINDYY00 1/6/2010 11:29AM

    I emoticon your BLOG! Thank you I realize that I CAN become a Runner no matter my weight. I have to JUST DO IT!.... emoticon emoticon

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YOYO-NOMO 1/6/2010 8:00AM

    Thank you for posting this. I'll think of your advice every time I want to quit when my trainer has be working on drills and my shins are on fire!

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LESSNESS1 1/5/2010 11:06AM

    thanks for your blog im going to sign up for a 5k walk/run as soon as i can find one.

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YOGASPIN 1/4/2010 12:33AM

    emoticon

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SANYA232 1/3/2010 1:54PM

    this a great blog....i am 5'4, 232lbs and i would love to start running..everything u said i can relate too. i just joined sparkpeople and im so determined to do this, im too the point i want to feel and look better i can taste it. it definitely encourages me and i thank you.

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RYLEE381 1/3/2010 9:49AM

    this is a great blog.. thanks for the motivation. I'd love to start running again!

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LOSINGFTW 12/28/2009 7:45PM

    I am friending you because this is probably the most inspiring blog I've read on Sparkpeopl, and I want to read more from you. I just started again, and I really want to finish the C25K this time!!

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WESTWIND19 12/21/2009 5:46PM

    Thank for the blog and the encouragement. I am currently working towards a half marathon...walking of course. I don't forsee much running going on, but finishing is my goal.

Best of Luck to you with working towards your goals!

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SORAIYA 12/17/2009 5:03PM

    I am inspired by this blog to start running. I am 5' 1''..and weigh 152 lbs...I have started walking/running on the treadmill . Today, while running, I felt my feet cramping and had to walk instead. I hope to survive the problems without hurting myself. emoticon

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ALF_CLAN 12/16/2009 10:52AM

    Thanks for the inspiration. I weigh 244 right now and 3 weeks ago I decided to start training for a 5k in the spring. I have dropped 5 minutes off my time and am in the "average" time now. This really made me feel more comfortable about being with all the size 6's come race time. Thanks again.

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FOSSE_OF_LOVE 12/15/2009 1:41PM

    Great Blog. Okay so I’m procrastinating getting up from this computer to jump on the elliptical. Your inspiring....I'm moving my butt.

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APPLEPIEDREAMS 12/15/2009 1:17PM

    Great advice! Wish I had your blog when I started running.

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GODSBEST 12/15/2009 11:27AM

    What a great inspirational blog !! I'm not in the same weight class, but I have decided to try a 5K (walk/run, whatever) before my 54th birthday in March. Thanks for the boost to go for it !!

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JUSDUCKY 12/15/2009 10:19AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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JUSDUCKY 12/15/2009 10:18AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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BRIENNA_P 12/15/2009 3:59AM

    What an awesome blog :) I actually started running about a year ago and goals help soooo much. As a runner I just want to throw this out there.... "body glide" is great for preventing shafting- I think i go t mine at rei. Here's the link! http://www.nationalrunningcenter.co
m/Body-Glide-Skin-Formula/produ
ctinfo/BG/

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SILLY1GIRL 12/14/2009 9:16PM

  Thank you for posting this. I will be a RWC too. I recently set my goal for the year to run my first 5k in DEC 2010. And currently 376. but this feels so right to me I have a goal that I can reach. I love what you had to say about how to get started!

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NO_SNOW_BODY 12/14/2009 7:29PM

    I loved the first blog and you DID inspire me to start a C25K which I have been able to do a bit more gradually than some, but I di the program at least 3 days a week and I love it.

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Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

"Someone Like Me"

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

If you get anything from this blog, it's this: Don't settle. Love yourself now, not 100, 50 or 20 pounds from now. Never settle.

There's an acquaintance of mine, let's call her Katy, who probably weighs close to 300 pounds. She is gorgeous, with this beautiful curly, silky black hair, pale perfect skin, big brown eyes, and a sparkling smile. I know that we big girls hate the "pretty face" backhanded compliment, but she really does have a beautiful, striking face. And she's funny and outgoing, but the confident facade is masking a whole lot of pain and rejection on the inside.

Needless to say, I see a lot of myself in Katy.

Katy has been dating this perfectly decent guy, "Mike." I mean, I never thought he was anything special, but he seemed nice, mildly attractive, and normal. She confessed to another friend, "Mike loves me more than I love him. Which is good for someone like me."

"Someone like me." The fat girl. Someone nobody should really want to date.

I felt crushed when I heard this, but since he treats her well, I figured, even if she is settling, maybe she'll realize that she somebody really can love her the way she is and that she is worth loving no matter what her weight. I dated plenty of duds before I met my husband, all with their own various issues. My first real boyfriend in college I dated for three years even though I had fallen out of love with him long before that. When he finally dumped me, I bawled uncontrollably for days, not because I had lost HIM, but because I truly believed that was the end for me, that I would never find someone else to love me. How sad is that? I was around the same age as Katy is now: 22, overdramatic, and stubborn.

So I figured, well, she'll learn that lesson the hard way. Probably the same way I did. And she'll meet someone else who she loves just as much has he loves her and there will be that instant connection and a lifetime of happiness.

I thought it was the same old story of a fat girl finding out that love is out there.

Except, I recently found out...

In Mike's spare time, he likes to dress as a woman.

Mike claims to be 100% heterosexual. Just, sometimes he likes to go out dressed as a woman. He even has a Facebook page of his "alter ego," and this woman has a whole backstory, photos, and a completely different set of friends. Don't get me wrong, I love my LGBT friends, but I just don't believe you can be a straight man and dress like a woman. I just don't.

So Katy found out. And Katy was shocked at first, but she eventually accepted it. And then she accepted his proposal of marriage. And they're getting married next year.

"Someone like me."

That phrase, just just rung in my ear as I heard the news. I know I shouldn't judge their relationship, and I'm not close enough to judge the relationship, but I see a whole lot of pain ahead for Katy, and that inspired this blog.

Again.

Don't settle. Never settle. Fall in love with yourself first. You're so worth it. At 500, 300, 100 pounds, you are worth the best that life has to offer.

Too many times I see the phrase "I'll ______ when I lose weight." Don't cheat yourself out on life because you feel like you're too fat, slow, or any other negative adjective.

"Someone like me" is someone worth loving.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RUNNING4MYLYF 12/13/2009 8:45PM

    It is hard to sit back and watch those we love make decisions that we, on the outside, can see aren't the right ones for them.

I, personally, had to make a very tough decision two years ago. When I got pregnant with my youngest son, I wasn't married to his father. He wasn't the right man for me and I knew it, in my heart of hearts. And I turned down his proposal when my son was four months...because I wasn't going to settle this go-round.

I hope Katy figures out she is worthy of being in love with someone she loves as much as they love her, before she ties the knot.



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NICOLEHARRIS83 12/11/2009 1:34AM

    that last statement really hit close to home. "I'll ______ when I lose weight." its so true :)
big people need to live too! I myself am a offender of this sentence. I know what it is like to feel like you can't do something because you are larger.
This poor Katy. Never settle! If you can list more than one reason why you should not be with that special someone, then you should not be with them at all- that is my moto :) In this case number one.... HE WEARS A DRESS!!!!!

thank you for this blog :)

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SHAY72 12/10/2009 7:46PM

    thanks for sharing this blog, let's hope that ur friend katy wakes up & realizes before it's too late, but if not all u can do is be there as a friend when she needs u. the word settle & love don't belong in the same sentence, beacause if u settle u may never find that one true person that is ur loving soulmate , but sounds like she would rather settle & have someone to love , than to wait & find that one guy that's waiting for her somewhere. ps tell katy that settle is not in her wedding vows.

Comment edited on: 12/10/2009 7:49:16 PM

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MOOSLADY 12/9/2009 1:10PM

    A good friend married a man with these tastes and after 3 kids and 10 years of marriage he decided he wanted to physically become a lesbian woman. She said she married a man and had no interest in being married to a woman. There was an ugly divorce and his kids are scarred for life. He insists they call him mom and tried to kidnap one of them, since he didn't have custody. Better to be alone. But she had the nerve to tell me that the only reason my husband loved me was that he was fat, too. In other words neither of us could do better. Well, almost 7 years later, I have lost 50 pounds and he has lost 40 and still have a great marriage. Don't let your weight in any way determine who you marry.

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DIGISCRAPPY 12/9/2009 9:29AM

    Great blog, Kristina!

Settling is only cheating yourself - there's nothing tangible gained by it. As time progresses, dissatisfaction creeps in and manifests in bigger and bigger ways, until it all results in something really messy in the end.

BTDT.

Rule of thumb: In ALL things, champion YOURSELF! Don't just take whatever comes along, because it came along, and you're afraid there won't be aother opportunity. Seek joy and happiness, because we ALL deserve joy and happiness.

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4EVERADONEGIRL 12/7/2009 1:25PM

    Another great blog! It so totally touched me because I wasn't the fat girl until after I was married and had kids...I was super thin and athletic "pre-kids" and then let myself go because I was basically punishing myself for a lot of reasons (one of these days I swear I am going to blog about it...but I guess I'm not there yet. I'll probably need a week to write it! LOL) but I still understand the statement and sentiment of "someone like me". Whether it is the "someone like me" that is fat, or has been sexually abused, or lacks self-esteem for other reasons...we all have a "someone like me" inside of us.

Thank you for helping everyone to see that we do need to love ourselves IN SPITE of ourselves!

Have I told you lately how much I appreciate you??? Well, just in case I haven't - I SO TOTALLY appreciate you, your insights and your friendship!! I can't say it loud enough - you ROCK!!!

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MBSHAZZER 12/7/2009 12:42PM

    So true... I wasted nearly 2 years of my life and a lot of heartache with a terrible person just because I thought I couldn't do any better & I deserved to be treated like crap - and I wasn't even overweight... so this post really speaks to everyone! We all struggle with our self worth and losing weight won't make our doubts about our worth go away... so it's better to get a handle on it and love ourselves at any size!

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DAPHNERUNNING 12/5/2009 10:21AM

    I know what you mean when you say you see yourself in her. My sister is the same way--if you don't believe you're worthy of someone perfect, you're not going to get someone who's right for you.

Incidentally, it is TOTALLY possible to be a straight male and like to wear women's clothes. There's a totally different sexuality and mentality to being a transvestite and a drag queen (and I've known both!).

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THE_NEW_MELISSA 12/4/2009 5:36PM

    I love this blog! Soooo true, we tend to wait...and waste sooo much time! I can tell you, I am/was Katy too. I married the guy that I thought would be the only man that could ever love me. It worked out ok, but I'm always left wondering, did I settle, or could it have been better. Don't get me wrong, I love love love my husband, but there's always that little nagging question in the back of my mind. I've given up a lot of myself for my marriage and my family, would I have had to if I had chosen someone else? Who knows, the moral is ...DON'T SETTLE! :) Happy Friday!

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CUBANJELLY 12/4/2009 2:28PM

    Very true. I can hear your pain for your friend in your blog. Talk to her about her, gently, if you two are very close. Just love her like you've been doing and pray for the best for her.

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TIFFANY_SUZANNE 12/4/2009 2:11PM

    It's funny - I have friends who are tall and slender and attractive and they still settled for someone. Because they couldn't find the right one, maybe? I don't know...but it makes me wonder. Is this something common among women? Low self esteem, a driving desire to look like the girls on the cover of magazines...yep. Makes sense to me.

VERY thought provoking blog. Thank you!

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LADYINOHIO 12/4/2009 10:08AM

    I'm related to a surely straight cross-dressing male, so it is possible.
Ironically, after marrying his first wife she left him to be with a woman after she'd gotten pregnant by him.
There are just allllll sorts of different people out there. :D
I really liked your post, it is very true that we shouldn't settle, not for very long anyway and not without a plan to escape the situation of "having to settle."
Unfortunately, sometimes we(people in general) do get to a scenario where there are things that are out of our control and for a while we may have to live in a situation we really don't like much. But that's where it comes down to making a plan.
I'm sorry about your friend, and her settling.
I know it probably makes your heart hurt to see it happen, I had a friend who did the same because she probably thought no one else would have her.
emoticon

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WEEZBUG82 12/3/2009 4:09PM

  How true! I love this blog!

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GONE2THEDOGS 12/3/2009 3:11PM

    Wow, what a great blog - really very sad too... "Someone like me"...yep, hard not to settle for some things but you are absolutely right - we shouldn't!!
Thank you for another great thought provoking post...

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BREW99 12/3/2009 9:18AM

    Oh, that is so sad... I hope it turns out okay. I believe that men can dress in woman's' clothes and still be straight though. Not that I would really encourage it, no offense to someone that lives by this lifestyle, it's just my silly opinion. Maybe she really does love him more than she realizes but can't be 100% truthful to feelings since she doesn't love herself first. Have you introduced S.P. to her?

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HOSTALADY 12/3/2009 7:14AM

    It is so difficult for so many of us to stop the settling in our lives. This journey is helping me, to step forward and express what I want in life and going after it. It feels so right. Thank you for sharing. I do wish her the best.

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SPIRITRUN 12/2/2009 9:56PM

    Wow, this is a thought-provoking post. I wish the best for "Katy". I hope she sees the light before long...

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JRIESSEL 12/2/2009 8:51PM

    Great blog post! Thanks for the great message.

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ESSYOUEEE 12/2/2009 7:48PM

    Such a wonderful blog. You brought tears to my eyes because I know what it is to be that girl.

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TRAVELNISTA 12/2/2009 6:39PM

    Wise words for us to all live by. I hope she going into this with her eyes wide open. I would have no idea on how to handle this if this was one of my friends. If he is OK with it and she is OK with it, I myself don't understand cross dressing then so be it.

If she is just settling then I hope she sees the light before it is too late.

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DENISE245 12/2/2009 5:31PM

    Wonderful post. So many of us have been settling for far too long. Thank you....I will not settle any longer.

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CHICAT63 12/2/2009 4:46PM

    Hi Karvy, excellent blog although too often us women tend to settle. My response might be a tad long.

Needless to say, I would like to share something with you myself when I met my daughter's Father I did not settle, this man treated me right, wanted to get married and have children (I was at my goal weight until I had my girls). Unknown to me he was bisexual and had several addictions. We were together for 10 years for 7 of them we were married. Our divorce was amicable and our relationship was most of time so-so our main concerns were our daughters. Would have I married him knowing that NO, so your friend Katy should think long and hard about marrying this guy. I have many gay, lesbian and even transgendered friends his cross-dressing will eventually take priority over her. This guy seems to be a lady in waiting, no pun !

But then again, a friend I know likes to cross-dress when in an alternative settings but is happily married with a child, his wife accepts it let's just say they both play.

However, I find way too often we as women to settle for men, for love, for jobs....my best friend has been in and out hate/love relationship with this one guy. She married him, divorced him, took him back, threw him out of the house I swear at least 57 times. She never gave the chance to others to love correctly so she has always gone back to him.

I've said enough *lol*, Josée

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SPRKBUGG 12/2/2009 2:53PM

    Wow, intense.

Yes yes yes.... NEVER EVER SETTLE!!!

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TERJEGOLD 12/2/2009 2:41PM

    Check out some of the interviews and videos of Gabby, the actress in the new movie "Precious". She is heavy, has been heavy most of her life and yet what you notice most about her is her LOVE of her life and her positive outlook pertaining to herself and others. Yo just fall in love with her the minute you see her on TV because she is so lovable. The reason she is lovable is because the truly loves herself. And that's the point. You simply must love yourself as you are, wherever you are. If you can do that, you have it made!

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DESERT_BIRD 12/2/2009 2:38PM

    This is a very well-written and thought-provoking post. And very sad too. Thank you for posting this!

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WISLNDR 12/2/2009 1:33PM

    Very sad. I hope Katy has a "moment of truth."

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AZIUGA 12/2/2009 1:26PM

    I have been there too, and I understand completely! I hope she realizes her self worth before she marries him, because then she can truly decide if she is selling herself short--on her own.
GREAT BLOG!!!!!!!

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RAINTHIEF 12/2/2009 1:25PM

    Absolutely wonderful blog. Thank you for sharing.

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SARANGEREL 12/2/2009 1:11PM

    It is a sad story but I can relate. I dated a guy in college for 5 years and was ready to settle, even after he had gone through some crazy religous changes (I am athiest) I was still willing to accept him. He finally broke it off because I was "fat and not christian" ("fat" at 150lbs) I felt horrible and my world fell apart. AND it was the best thing that ever happened to me. Thanks so much for posting this! Don't let others dictate who you should be...don't settle! While it is scary thinking that you might face a life alone, that is when true love finds you.

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FITMAMA1984 12/2/2009 1:09PM

    I am at a loss for words. I can only hope she comes to her senses before the wedding. She's lucky to have someone like you who cares enough to worry about her.

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HUGMONKEYMOM 12/2/2009 12:47PM

    This is one of the most fantastic blogs I have ever read. Period.

Having said that, I am an eternal optimist at heart, maybe everything will work out for your friend (I don't happen to believe that a guy can't be straight and like dressing up as a woman, for the record.) I hope she doesn't have years of sadness ahead of her. Maybe he loves her because she is willing to accept "someone like him" and they will live comfortably happy...

All of that however, doesn't change the power of your message. We all need to love ourselves and believe that someone is out there, not only that loves us unconditionally, but we love right back just as unconditionally.

No one is gonna love you until you love you. Thanks for reminding us.

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RAVEN227 12/2/2009 12:36PM

    I am speechless! emoticon

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MJLUVSANIMALS 12/2/2009 12:28PM

    Ok I have to think that a person that cross dresses, has some deep seeded gender focusing problem. It doesn't mean that they are leaning toward that side, but there is a problem. I don't think I myself would continue a relationship that has this part of it included, in the package. And your friend should not settle, because she is afraid she will not find love again. My own Grandmother "settled" and was very unhappy for the rest of her life. A very sad way to leave this world. We all have a lot to offer, and we can find it within ourselves, and not answer to anyone else, but to the warm center, we all have inside.

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CLSYLADY 12/2/2009 12:24PM

    Great post! You are so right, love yourself now. The way I look at it is if you don't love yourself, who is really going to love you? I hope and pray that Katy will wake up before it is too late and she is in a great deal of pain.

Never settle and love yourself... great words, thanks for posting them!

emoticon

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TEAM-SARAH 12/2/2009 12:20PM

    That is so sad :( I hope your friend realizes she is settling because she's afraid to be alone. I've been there before too... in college.

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PINKCOCONUT 12/2/2009 12:18PM

    I've been there and have seen far too many people in the same situation and you're right, this shouldn't happen. My oldest brother saw a woman for three years and even though he knew within the year he didn't want to be with her, he didn't break it off. They dated for three years with the most massive arguments and him basically hating her, but he wouldn't break up with her. When we found out she was cheating on him and my own mother kicked her out (they were living with us at the time - I was in high school), he STILL continued to see her for six months afterwards. He hasn't dated since. He's given up.

When my second last boyfriend broke up with me, that was the straw that broke the camels back. That's when I realized I CAN and SHOULD be loved RIGHT NOW. I had plenty of overweight friends in perfectly healthy relationships so I knew that weight wasn't my problem, it was my confidence.

That is definitely a motto of mine: don't settle. With ANYTHING. We deserve to have what we want.

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ONMYWAYTOGOAL 12/2/2009 12:00PM

    You said it all Sweetie!!! Great Blog!!

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LIVINHEALTHY4 12/2/2009 11:59AM

    Very moving post. I see how I have settled in the past, due to my size - how I have not lived as full a life as I deserved. This resonated with me, made me think back to the many times I put myself last or totally cast my thoughts and opinions aside because "who wants to hear what the fat girl has to offer". Thank you for this post!

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BETHSHEALTH 12/2/2009 11:58AM

    This is very sad. I know there are a lot of "Katy's" out there. I believe to a degree I was one myself. You are very right about the don't settle. My husband learned that one right before he met me. He discovered he had to accept himself before he could find love. I cant imagine at this point what my life would be like if I'd settled instead of waiting on God's timing to meet my husband. It's not a bad thing to wait for marriage. I know to many people who wish they'd waited for the right one who came along second. I told friends who were lamenting their first marriages that I guessed I had waited for my second marriage to be my first.

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GRACEISENUF 12/2/2009 11:57AM

    This blog really sums up how we can be down on ourselves when we feel we don't measure up in a society where "thin is in".

I agree with you when you say you think Katy is headed for heartache.

For me personally the big breakthrough on loving myself came when I finally realized that God loves me just the way I am, unconditionally. That realization changed my entire life around. We don't have to "settle" for second best in life.

I am so glad I didn't postpone running because of my size and what others would think. I want to enjoy EVERY part of this life I have been given. Great blog once again.

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EMILYBCRUZ 12/2/2009 11:54AM

    :tears: Well said sista. Couldn't be more true....

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