Monday, May 25, 2009
It's a funny feeling, knowing that I am at half way point. It's almost like.. hey.. it took me 6 months to get here, now I know I can get to the end of this. But at the same time I feel like: man, I lost 50lbs.. that's so awesome, and it makes me feel comfortable.
I don't like feeling "comfortable", cause that's the feeling that got be to obesity in the first place.
SO I had to take a hard look at myself today and schedule my cleanse days vs. shake days and reminded myself that I haven't been to the gym in 2 weeks, AGAIN. But I did my 20min Turbo Jam. It's not the same, but it's a little pick-me-upper, when I can't get to the gym.
Today is a cleanse day, it wasn't supposed to be, but last night Scott tempted me with pizza at the moment of weakness and I said yes. Not his fault, I know I kind of made it sound like it is, but no. I could have said NO.. instead I gave in...I didn't gain any weight, in fact I actually lost -0.4lbs but I know that pizza wasn't the right thing to put in my body and definitely not HALF OF THE WHOLE PIZZA. That's what I mean by "comfortable" "Oh I'm back to 199lbs let me sabotage myself" WHAT THE HECK?
So I'm cleansing today as a punishment to myself and to clean all that sodium out of me AGAIN.
as I am still at 199lbs I will go ahead and treat myself to a mani/padi today. Cause well.. after all I made it here, even if I crawled half the way. So I feel like I deserve it just a little bit.
I will be going out of town again, this time to Isagenix University and I'll be back home on June1st. That's when my new schedule kicks it up a notch and I will be pushing myself to the limits.
I don't know how, other than by the Grace of Almighty God Himself, but I will make it to that finish line.
150lbs is just around the corner! I might not see that finish line yet, but it's like that moment in your work out when you look at the time and you know that you just did half of it and you know that you can totally make it all the way. That's where I'm at.