Friday, May 01, 2009
Okay so I think it's time to start blogging again. It's been a while since January for me.. and I'm happy to say that while I haven't been very active I have lost another 7 pounds since the last time I logged in. I was afraid I wouldn't have changed or worse might have gained. The fact is that I had planned to go skiing. and instead ended up getting a very severe asthma attack. It was so bad I was scared for my life. The fact was my medicine I was taking to relieve the asthma was advair which is a drug you take to prevent asthma not to get rid of an asthma attack so I was not taking the right medication in the right doses hence the asthma problems.. I have learned and become informed and I am doing much much better now but it scared the living bejesus out of me and I've been a bit scared to exercise since. I had been on a walk to the library which normally is a pretty good walk for me about 3 miles there and 3 miles back.. I collapsed on the way there. See the fast acting inhaler that I use is in a different type of container than the advair discuss and this was a sample given to me from my doctor because my pro air was not working for me like my albuterol used to so she gave me this sample of what i thought was ventilin which is another fast acting inhaler.. I didn't look at the bottle I just inhaled it and it wasn't getting any better.. luckily a good samaritan picked me up and gave me a ride home and I was able to use my nebulizer which had the albuterol in it I had to use it several times for it to work but eventually I was much better and then I saw my doctor and we got everything under control properly. but wow.. that was a very close call and I almost died. I shut down.. got scared and decided to just use my eliptical machine to work out and stop walking.. at least at home I had my machine nearby if I had a problem with asthma but that is no way to live for me as i get severely depressed when I shut myself in my house and I cannot function that way so I've braved the world once again and armed with the right asthma medication I think I'm ready to start back into my walking regime and I'm sure my mood will improve accordingly. Fear.. it really can debilitate someone!!!! So luckily I didn't backtrack.. I also went out and bought Jillian Micheal's tape the 30 day shred and wow let me tell you for someone just used to walking and the elliptical machine let me tell you.. doing pushups, jumping jacks and ab exercises is tought! 5 minutes into the tape and I was literally crying my eyes out. What a wake up call!!!! I felt proud of myself for doing it. I did have to take breaks and it was just the first phase of a three part group of exercises and it was 20 minutes in all but I think I needed it. Jillian Michaels is one of the personal trainers on the Biggest Loser .. she is amazing.. if you haven't tuned into that show .. DO!!! It's incredibly motivating and wonderful to see the transformations these people undergo while on the show. I myself have applied and sent in a tape to the Biggest Loser but alas have never gotten any call about it. I plan to reapply here soon. Yes I've lost a lot of weight. it has made an incredible impact on my life.. daily functions.. My feet don't hurt all the time anymore just after a long days walking.. my back doesn't hurt all the time like it used to. I'm not out of breath just going to the car and I don't sweat constantly those are just a few of the changes losing 145 pounds has done for me. And yet here I sit.. I'm 237 pounds and just 5'4" people look at me and I'm still the fat chick. I haven't had a date in years.. I've a long road ahead still.. but the future looks bright.. I mean I can do so much more now then I have been able to do in years.. Yes I still hate my body.. I'm flabby and I'm still uncomfortable and I'm always using a blanket to push in my abs to be comfortable while sitting here at the computer. I wish I could do more than I do.. I see those people on the Biggest loser and I marvel at what they are able to do there at the ranch working out 4-6 hours a day! Wow I think I would just drop dead! I can't do 5 minutes of jumping jacks without crying and stopping.. I'll get there but I'm afraid it will take much longer than the 17 weeks it has taken these people to lose over one hundred pounds. Anyway, I do not expect to lose more than 1 or 2 pounds a week but as long as I'm maintaining or losing weight I will feel good. I've taken to putting a sticker on my calendar after I have worked out for the day. Currently April had two stickers.. Lets see that May has at least 3!!!!