Monday, December 09, 2013
I have been doing a 100 day countdown now for 61 days! I just love counting backwards because no matter what I do the numbers keep going.
The writing diet has a food journal component and today I plan to USE it. I have my clean food plan for today, just took the meat from the freezer and I have everything else on hand. Failing to plan is planning to fail, right?
So what I need to do is journal when I want to eat off plan. The 4 questions BEFORE it goes in my mouth.
1. Am I hungry?
2. Is this what I really want to eat?
3. Is this what I really want to eat now?
4. Is there a better alternative?
This includes if I reach for some of the baking I did yesterday. It includes if I am out on the road on this blustery winter day and decide to stop for coffee. This includes tonight if I decide not to practice harp and instead sit down in front of my television. Food not on the plan must be journalled first. I'm not saying an absolute no, because there may be a very good reason.... I am not aiming for perfection here. I want to avoid making a bad food choice because I am hungry, angry, lonely or tired. I want to avoid making a bad food choice because I am bored. I want to be in control, not the dragon. The dragon had sugar yesterday and it is lurking, waiting, hoping to trick me into giving it more. And more, more will make it stronger and me weaker. One of my questions FOR ME, is "will this trigger the dragon or send it back to bed". OK I am redoing my list:
So what I need to do is journal when I want to eat off plan. The FIVE questions BEFORE it goes in my mouth or the money leaves my wallet.
1. Will this trigger the dragon or send it back to bed?
2. Am I hungry? Maybe I am thirsty!
3. Is this what I really want to eat?
4. Is this what I really want to eat now? Can I postpone this for later?
5. Is there a better alternative? Maybe it is time for BED!
Saturday, December 07, 2013
Yesterday I was right on track. Did my morning pages, did my walk, ate my veggies, ate clean. My two DD's made sushi for the first time and had a blast doing it. Not my favourite food but what they made was very tasty.
Today I wish to honour my body. All about water. I think to really honour my body I need to be strong. I have neglected Strength training for a while and am grateful that on my goal list I have "ST 3x/wk" because every time I look at it I think, oh yes... today I will. Well, today I will! Do some aquafit in the water. I won't be able to push too hard because I have not been doing it a while, but I have an excellent routine. Drinking water - have my water bottle with me and keep sipping. Feed and wash all my cells from the inside out. And emersing myself in water. It always feels very spiritual thing when I take the time.... so I will go in the pool and take a few minutes to just appreciate how it feels to be weightless, quiet, and at peace. Then I'll start walking or I will get chilled, lol.
It is time to change modes from writing to Christmas and B&B. Got to do a major clean and start decorating and get ready for guests. DH has been great working on some problem things in the house and last night said today he'll keep working on them. I am so blessed to have a man who is handy.
So - focus. Write, walk in the pool today, strength train doing aquafit, water drinking, clean clean clean, water, water, water.
Friday, December 06, 2013
The Writing Diet is working for me. I am learning. The Christmas party last night which inluded "food" was a lie. DH and I stayed over night in Kingston to do jobs there and when we got back to Ottawa I drove him to work. I did my "morning pages" and walk with the dog FIRST and I know that is probably going to be my goal always now. I liked how I wrote yesterday it is checking in with me and then checking in with God. I am so smart sometimes but I don't realize it until I start writing that stream of conciousness.
So last night's food was deep fried everthing you can imagine, as finger foods. Is that even real food? I kept waiting for a carrot stick or something. Had to eat so I did and we had not eaten since an early lunch of chili out. I had cornflakes for breakfast so zero fruits or vegetables yesterday... I suspect the cranberrry juice was all sugar. Drank cranberry juice last night BTW, no alcohol. Socialized and DANCED. It was fun. This morning I felt like what I ate, crap. Fuzzy headed and aweful. The scale is being kind and says 200. Wow, still love that number. Ate my high protein dairy breakfast and feel much much better so I'm doing my writing then go for the walk.
I am imagining my life as an infinite puzzle. You start picking up pieces and don't know what they are so you toss them. Then you start recognizing patterns, similarities and realize some parts fit together. If you are like me you start doing the edge pieces because there is a continuity you can see. The middle stuff seems like a mystery. I'm sure many people spend all their lives working on the edge. An infinite puzzle can have you doing that .. well, infinitely. However for those who dare to dive into the middle and start seeing the connections between seemingly random pieces... it is quite magical. How low B12 can affect oxygen getting to every part of your body, how deep pressure of your large muscles can calm your nervous system for several hours so a walk can help you work more efficiently, how sleep is the only time when magnesium can really work to repair cells in your body so you can wake to feel revived and you really ARE! When the puzzle starts coming together in 2-D it's pretty cool to look at it and think, wow, something is there. When it become more real and you find it is YOU, life, how it is all connected it's.... amazing. I have moments when I glimpse how this complicated interaction is what makes us part of God and vice versa and... it is truly the greatest masterpiece. Even being able to "sense" that makes me believe there must be 6 dimensions. Beyond spirituality which is our connection to God, each other and the world and the ... I don't know what to call is as there are no words. Maybe it is the "Om". The resonance life force. All connected to the vitamin or .....
I don't want to be afraid to keep learning. Keep becoming aware. I know there are times when I am holding on to one edge piece and that is all I can do. I hope some day I am dancing between pieces helping them, faccilitating them to make the "Om" more complete. Is that possible? Is the process also part of the "Om"? Deep thinking. Grateful. Takes the pressure off me to do great things.... or to really appreciate that going for a nap is greatness in the works!
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