Immediate & Short Term Goals: Day 1

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Some people delete their profiles and start anew. I have not decided whether or not I will do that. While that minor decision is in the back of my mind, I am moving forward. Instead of blogging (or not) at night, I am blogging this morning to set my immediate goals for the day. Those goals will get me closer to the short term goal of losing the first 4 pounds.

Water 10 glasses = working on the first 3 right now
Food track for the first time in a while = breakfast logged in
Strength training will be Kettle bells
Walking will be my cardio

I'm trying an alternative treatment for gallstones. I have been eating lots of apples this week. The article said the malic acid in apples would soften the stones. Tonight will be the rest of the treatment (epson salts, olive oil and ___). Supposedly, tomorrow I will have results. I have had lots of orthopedic surgery and some dental surgery, but I've never had any other kind of surgery. Not excited about losing an organ. There seems to be conflicting info about the gall bladder. Yes, it's important for helping the body digest fat. Or, no it's not important. Not having it removed (the only standard medical option) leads me open to increased chance of bile duct cancer. Removing it leads me open to having more digestive issues than I already have. So I hope this experiment works. I guess this is a new way of taking care of myself. I have never tried anything like this.

In addition to the goals noted above for today, I have chores and errands. So off I go. I intend to blog again tonight to report on my success. Or I might do the update tomorrow morning.

Thanks for the support on my last blog. I truly was close to logging off for the last time...!

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Leave? Maybe...

Saturday, July 21, 2012

Rambling Thoughts
A different recruiter called me about the same job that I blogged about last. Phone tag = unresolved. This one is a contracted recruiter with a 503 area code (OR). Strange.

More layoffs are being talked about, as if several people have been given that pink slip in the last week. But I try not to tune in to the rumor channel. Most of the time, it turns out to be true, but it saps the energy. Yesterday was the sendoff for my first boss at the company. Mary was a fabulous boss, a warm “mom” type. Everyone loves her! This one really, really hurts.

I have been mentoring 3 students this summer. Last week, I had the opportunity to encourage one of them to present herself with more confidence, (I know – me?!) and I showed her how her body language (clasped hands almost up to her throat) telegraph a lack of confidence. I told her a little of my background and encouraged her to join our Toastmaster club. This morning, I had a similar heart-to-heart with our second student. She started crying and unburdened a heavy heart. Afterwards, when she came to ask me a business question, she was far less nervous and projected confidence. As I told my boss last week, I appreciate the trust that the company has in me to allow me to all but manage these young women. I told him that I am finding this experience to be both humbling and exhilarating. During our heart-to-heart conversation, she told me that this internship is the first job where she has gotten support. The fact that I have complimented her analytic skills and told her to “trust her instincts” – those are things she has never heard. Sofia is a beautiful young woman with a beautiful mind and an entire life ahead of her. It was heart-breaking to hear her story. I shared a tiny bit of mine and told her that I wanted to encourage her because I did not want her to have to learn the same lessons I did the hard way, that, if I could help her through this, then what I went through was worth it. In my own life, because I have no family nearby and don’t make friends easily, I don’t often have the chance to be supportive and nurturing. Hey, now I sound like Mary, my former boss! I had no idea that being a mentor would give me so much!

Recently, SP changed some of the points. One of those changes was to increase the number of points one could earn commenting on member blogs. So I have been commenting on blogs of people in my teams, even though I don’t know them in the SP sense of the word. One person misunderstood what I said and my subsequent efforts to explain only made things worse. I feel badly. It’s almost the last straw as far as SP goes.

The bigger problem, literally, is me. I had a doctor appointment that was a follow-up on my ER visit. I had not met my doctor before. When my previous doctor transferred to a farther-away clinic, I had to select a new doctor. I like her! I actually had a list of questions and we talked about them (first time I have ever done that.) She offered a steroid shot for my bursitis (declined – too scary), we talked about my gall stones and she said all they would do is remove the gall bladder. (declined for now. All I have ever had is dental and orthopedic surgery, not interested in organ removal unless I MUST). Blood pressure low (normal for me), temp 98 something (high for me) and then there was the scale. I was not surprised, but I was very disappointed, to see that I have regained everything I lost over my entire SP journey. I have long since lost my Spark.

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A Cautionary Tale?

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Last night, when I got home and logged into my personal email account, I got a huge surprise. An HR rep for a local high tech company found my info on LinkedIn and asked me if she could send me a job description for an openinng in her company. She thought I might be a good fit. Flattered and curious, I said yes. Her reply was almost immediate including the description and the salary range.

I realize this is analogous to those "preapproved" credit card offers. I have been invited to apply. It does not mean I get it. But, still. It was a great surprise!

The floor of the salary range is more than $20K more than I make. Of course, I read the description. Parts of the job I am familiar with, some I have zero or limited experience with (and no interest in).

I looked at their website and was intrigued by their business - it dovetails with my interests and past experience.

I did not sleep much last night. I emailed my resume this morning. She replaied that she had forwarrded it to the hiring manager for review.

In the meantime, I contacted two paralegal mentors. One said "go for it". The other said "run away!" I used to work with both and I trust their judgment. Turns out the one who said "run away" used to work at this company! What she shared with me about the company, their culture and their personnel made me want to take a shower.

Next time I research a company, I will include their name + the word "litigation". Yikes.

I am staying put for now. I love my job. I like and respect the people I work with. I have a short commute. I could only wish for more money, but this does not appear to be the right open door.

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I Did Not Fall on My Face!

Thursday, July 05, 2012

This afternoon, I had the follow-up to Sunday's trip to the ER - a stress test. I've never had one and did not know what to expect. i was afraid I would fall, fall or otherwise make a complete fool of myself. I actually went longer than they needed and the test was a huge success. No heart problems, no hypertension.

Still no answer for the event that brought me to the ER on Sunday.

In other news, on the heels of learning of Christie's mastectomies, I learned another friend lost her sister this morning. Carolyn needed a lung transplant that did not happen.
Carolyn's fiance, Gary, died earlier this year for the lack of a kidney transplant.

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Yvonne, Christi and Me

Monday, July 02, 2012

Yvonne sent me an email yesterday saying that she had received my card and that we need to talk. Progress towards reconciliation? Not sure.

Late last week, I learned that Christi is undergoing a double mastectomy tomorrow. She said she found a lump about the size of a pencil eraser and this is the result! I am thankful she found it early! She just started a new job a few months ago and now this. The surgery follows several radiation treatments. I appreciate your prayers on her behalf.

Me? Going backwards fast. I learned that the leg pain is sciatica and I know the knee is arthritis and weight. I spent 8 hours at the ER last night. I was having shortness of breath and pain. The closest I can describe it is the feeling you get when you eat peanut butter and it gets stuck as you try to swallow. Three EKGs, two shots of morphine and a mega dose of motrin and a CT scan later, they could find nothing wrong. No heart trouble, no heart damage, no blood clots and, oh by the way, the CT scan reveals I have gall stones!

I still feel like crap and worked only a few hours. I came home and went to sleep for a while. It helped, but not enough.

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