Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Not much to say tonight, which is kind of odd.
What did I do today?
I walked for 53 minutes which included a different walk at lunch time. I walked a different direction so, while it was not quite as long as yesterday's walk, I felt the work because of the hills. I know it raised my heart rate, but I still have a way to go before I reach what SP calls the target heart rate for cardio. (Almost a year on the site and I am still not there yet!).
I came home and did some strength training and I feel that, too.
The food is within range, with dinner still to occur, and the water is covered.
There are a few things I can share that do give me something to say.
There are now two openings for attorneys where I work. One is to replace an attorney who gave his notice last week and the other is to add an attorney in our Knoxville office. Our newest attorney starts next week (she is replacing the one who was let go in December). With all that and with the company's notoriously slow action on responding to internal applications, I have not heard anything about my application for the paralegal position. I know there are reasons why they might not hire me, but there are also reasons why they should. My insecurity creeps in and I fear that I will not be seriously considered. If I don't even get an interview, does that mean I should take the hint and start job hunting?
I need to drop a lot of weight soon if I do need to job hunt. I don't have the wardrobe to do that and I can't spend nor do I want to replace this size. I would like to defer wardrobe spending until more pounds are history!
My company's founder died in 2007 at the age of 95. He was in the office the day before he died. We had a party for him at his 90th and 95th birthdays. Someone asked what he had to say about his longevity. He said that, had he known he was going to live so long, he would have taken better care of himself. By the end of his life, he used a walker and was in a lot of pain due to zero cartilage in his knees. He was a real inspiration to me. How could I complain about how I feel at my age when he was still active and contributing and working at 95? I am still in awe of his intellect, his humor and his humanity. He started the company after a full life as a teacher, as a nuclear engineer and was already a grandfather! I love the story about him trying to join the military at the outbreak of WW II. The recruiter asked him what he did and when he said something about nuclear energy, the recruiter sent him home saying "you can do more for us at your job." His patented design for cooling nuclear fuel in power plants is still in use in some countries.
His widow died this weekend at 94. I walked past his portrait several times today and all I could think is that they are now reunited in Heaven. I don't know exactly, but I am sure they were married for over 50 years. Their anniversary falls on my birthday (though they were married years before). The company is sending flowers and I sent a card to their daughter. I met her at his memorial service and we spoke briefly. Oddly, I had been thinking of his widow a lot in the past few days. Now I know why.
Monday, January 24, 2011
65 - minutes walked today (not all at once)
02 - mintes on the elliptical (!)
06 - strength training exercises
05 / 02 hip flexor time without help
I can do hip flexors all day long as long as I have at least a finger touching the wall. Standing on my right leg, I can last 5 seconds without help. Standing on my left leg, I can last 2 seconds on a good day without help. I will keep working on this balance exercise.
My legs felt like jello after the 2 minutes on the elliptical. It sets for a minimum of 20 minutes - it will take me a while to work up to that!
I am feeling pretty chunky, but I am not going to focus on THAT number (scale) right now. I am going to keep moving forward (literally and figuratively) and work on building up my energy (I still am TIRED after this month of blah!)
THANK YOU for all the support and encouragement. I really appreciate it!
Sunday, January 23, 2011
A migraine threatened all day. Again, I did nothing productive. I am a bit down. I am tired of tracking food, of exercising, of the journey. I hope the mood passes very soon. I gave in and ate way over today. I am not particularly depressed, angry or upset, just beaten down.
Thank you, SparkFriends, who have posted comments and sent goodies. You are a lifeline!
Saturday, January 22, 2011
I did not sleep much at all last night and spent today dealing with really weird back spasms and a headache that is threatening to become a migraine.
No walk or other exercise.
Still within range for food, but I am also fighting the urge to inhale all kinds of stuff. I have healthy food, it would be just a matter of more than I should have...
The scale is up about 1.5 pounds. Not surprising - I think it's just my body getting back to life after this dreadful cold.
I am tired of having these aches and pains!
Friday, January 21, 2011
She brought doughnuts again today. I have skipped so many doughnuts, so many candies, dip and chips and all the holiday goodies. I am not a saint and this is also not a statement of deprivation. I did not feel well today and it was the kind of blah where I thought carbs would make me feel better. In the past, that has been a license to inhale food like crazy. How did I do today? Not as well I as would have like to have done.
Instead of a walk at lunch, I went to my car and slept. I guess I needed it because I was out!
For most of the day, I was in the mood to eat anything in front of me. There was nothing in front of me, so that was good. Later in the afternoon, I went down to give Angie something and she gave me the doughnuts. They smelled so good! One was a cinnamon twist and I love those! I headed to the kitchen and got some herbal tea. There I saw that there was leftover pizza from a meeting. Combo pizza = my favorite! Someone came in to get coffee and I walked away. I don't like people seeing me carry food, so I thought I would come back in an hour to see if the two slices were there. I went back to my desk and inhaled two doughnut holes. Then I turned away from the bag of doughnuts and got back to work. When I went back to the kitchen, the pizza boxes were empty! YAY!
A disappointing day in terms of exercise. A muscle went nuts in my back so I did not push it. I was not completely victorious in food, but it was not a wipeout either.
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