JUNEAU2010   165,323
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If I Used Stress as an Excuse...

Thursday, September 02, 2010

Over 8K steps today. I am loving the fact that I can walk throughout the day without seriously waking up my tendonitis! I had 8 glasses of water before lunch. I finished a task today that I had been fighting a block about.

However, if I were newer to the SparkPeople journey or had not started on the journey at all, I would have had many reasons today to stuff my face.

The CEO is retiring tomorrow. The new guy starts immediately and the rumor mill is full of layoff talk.

An unexpected financial setback cropped up this morning.

The evening ended with my sister's news that her soonto-be-ex is being mean, ugly and awful as they go through the beginnings of the divorce proceedings. Admittedly, I am hearing just her side, but her side is pretty awful. She gets to pay support to him and he is not being required to pay child support. Money is beyond tight. I have never heard my sister this upset.

My stomach hurts and I feel powerless to help in any meaningful way. I have not had dinner yet and, it being so late, I may not.

Tonight - stress is not making me stuff! I WIN!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CARRAND 9/3/2010 11:03PM

    Woo Hoo! Good for you. Hang in there. You're a real sweetie and you deserve the best.

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LIBBYFITZ 9/3/2010 2:06PM

    emoticon emoticonon not eating because you were stressed.

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JAKEANDNELLIE 9/3/2010 11:19AM

    Stay strong!!
You and your sister are in my prayers that better times are coming!

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CHAOTIC-KITTY 9/3/2010 8:24AM

  Really sorry to hear that you're so stressed out... :( But, as you said.. it's great that you didn't turn to food.. and that you won that battle. :)

Comment edited on: 9/3/2010 8:24:43 AM

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JHADZHIA 9/2/2010 11:51PM

    So sorry about your sister :((
Unfortunately, stress is harmful to a healthy lifestyle and not just because of the binge potential. I hope all goes well for you at work and you don't get a lay off. Keeping fingers crossed.
Good for you not wanting to binge, but skipping eating altogether isn't much better -maybe eat something bland that will help settle your stomach.
Take care of yourself.

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Wednesday, September 01, 2010

That cinnamon roll looks pretty good! I remember what it tastes like!
No, I don't want that today. I would rather lose 1.5 pounds this week because I choose to lose 6 pounds this month.

It's really hot outside. The A/C feels good at my desk.
Yes, I want to walk outside today. I would rather lose 1.5 pounds this week because I choose to lose 6 pounds this month.

Going out to lunch sounds wonderful! I love to eat out!
I brought a really healthy lunch and I would rather log that into my food tracker than some unknowns. I would rather lose 1.5 pounds this week because I choose to lose 6 pounds this month.

A cold soda would really hit the spot in the middle of the afternoon. I love the perk from caffeine. I have a 24 oz water bottle that holds cold water. I know how refreshing that water will be! I would rather lose 1.5 pounds this week because I choose to lose 6 pounds this month.

Pizza would be so yummy and convenient on the way home.....I know the rest!
(I had a Boca burger with chives, mustard and a sprinkle of shredded cheddar
and it was fabulous!)

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JAKEANDNELLIE 9/3/2010 10:02AM

    What wonderful choices you are making! I wish I had your willpower and determination and could remain consistent!
Stay positive!

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CHAOTIC-KITTY 9/2/2010 10:56AM

  emoticon stuff! Keep it up. :)

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MYSTERY4EVER 9/2/2010 8:23AM

    Fabulous choices! The food is so transitory. What you are doing is long-lasting. I'm sure you will make your goal of 6 pounds.

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LIBBYFITZ 9/2/2010 7:09AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MISSY455 9/2/2010 2:19AM


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JHADZHIA 9/2/2010 1:26AM

    Way to go!! You have so many temptations you have to avoid! I have a pop machine right outside my apartment door, but have never been tempted to use it. I really don't like it any more. Nothing quenches thirst like pure, plain water..
Keep up the great work! Those 6 will be history!!

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    Sounds like you are getting the hang of this 'healthy lifestyle' thing...LOL. You are a wonderful inspiration to others. Keep up the good work.

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A Triple Win!

Wednesday, September 01, 2010

I was going to call this blog "Snarly Mood = Head Down at Work and an Opportunity" but I found a much more positive title!

I was pleased to discover this morning that yesterday's 10K steps did not aggravate my tendonitis too badly! I felt it, but I did not wake up in pain. That is progress. I got in 9861 today. I thought about taking the stairs a couple of times but did not want to reawaken a cranky knee.

I realized early in the day that I was just out of sorts. In a snarly mood and I know exactly why: TOM. Actually have not had that happen for months, so I should have anticipated this one would be a challenge. (Age, nothing serious happening). I tried to keep to myself at work because of the little things that I found so irritating. I did not want to have to eat my sharp words later!

A manager (not mine) said she had too much to think about, too many facts for her little brain. She asked me for a tax exempt certificate and I asked to see the invoice so I could see how the taxes were characterized. It was a utility bill, so I figured there'd be a ton of little fees like cell phone bills. She sent me a statement which had no detail. When I sent it back and asked again for the invoice, she said she didn't realize I wanted the invoice and then made that stupid comment. A manager who chooses not to understand the elements of what she's managing? I don't respect her, though I respect her position. It was all I could do not to say anything. That taps into my lack of patience with stupid.

The menu at the onsite cafe had an entree that I thought sounded great, but, when I got there, they had switched the choices. I chose something I was curious about. The chef does traditional ethnic foods with a California twist and sometimes the combinations are pretty good. Not so today. It was flavorful, almost too spicy, but it was greasy, which I had not expected. To make matters worse, the carry out dish leaked all over the front of my shirt. Thank goodness I had a t shirt in my workout bag. It was a company t shirt so it looked ok even though today was not casual dress day. I was glad no one sent me home. I hope the shirt washes out because it's one I really use!

I received an email today for a nationally known, possibly even internationally known, charity. They will be having a fundraiser walk in November in San Jose. At work, they've been doing a wellness thing all year with an incentive of up to $250 at the end of the year if you do all kinds of different self improvement things such as eat more veggies, attend a stress management seminar, get all your annual check ups and participate in a community event. If I do this walk (never been good at fundraising), it would benefit this child charity, contribute to my $250 incentive AND get my butt moving! A triple win!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JHADZHIA 9/2/2010 1:31AM

    Congrats on continuing to do well. Sounds like you needed a Tide stick for your shirt, they work really well, saw a woman get blueberry stain off her blouse once. Well done not losing your temper with idiots :)
It would be fabulous if you did that charity walk. I am really shy and withdrawn, but I once raised funds for a charity walk, Relay For Life, and really enjoyed it as it meant a lot to me, knowing many people that have died of cancer and had cancer scares.

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CARRAND 9/1/2010 9:47PM

    Keeping quiet when others are stupid is probably the best thing you can do. I have to do it all the time at work. Sometimes I put my phone to voice mail just to get away from it for a while. Then I wander around to talk to my employees who are really a great bunch.

Your walk sounds like a great idea!

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EMPTYNESTER60 9/1/2010 7:02PM

    Glad you could end what could have been a really negative day with a positive blog. I too have not just a supervisor, but the owner of the company who constantly does things that she would have our heads for if we did them. Really aggravating, but . . . she's the boss & signs the paychecks, so . . . we suck it up & go on emoticon

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    I thought Win-Win situations were good...but I like your Win-Win-Win one even better!!! I have those irritability days (and "stupid" can pluck my last nerve quicker than anything. Big congrats to you for holding your tongue, though.

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LIBBYFITZ 9/1/2010 2:49PM

    emoticonThat sounds good. I know what you mean about a manager not even knowing there own area of what they are managing! Duh!
hope you're irritability levels are dropping! emoticon

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CHAOTIC-KITTY 9/1/2010 2:09PM

  Well best of luck if you do decide to do the fundraiser thing. :) And, I like the "A Triple Win!" title much better than what you were going to name it. ;) Congrats on getting so many steps in too.

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MISSY455 9/1/2010 1:52AM

    Very positive title! The walk sounds like a definite plus.

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Spark Rally Team SPARKed Me!

Monday, August 30, 2010

This weekend, CHAOTICKITTY blogged about the fact that she joined the Cincinnati Spark Rally team and she is hoping to attend (05/21/11). That got me excited! The chance to meet her is AWESOME! Of course, I want to meet all my Sparkfriends, but she is a particular friend and mega inspiration to me!

So I decided to start working on my September goals TODAY! I even set some monthly goals, which I have not done in a specific manner since starting SparkPeople in late January. I think I have been hesitant to set specific goals because my dieting past has said that that is a recipe for certain failure.

My weight loss goal for September is a "stretch" goal, but I am going to work on it and see how it goes: 6 pounds! Four is achievable, eight is probably too much, so six seems an appropriate challenge.

Today, I walked at lunch, but I did something slightly different. I usually walk to the cafe for the free fruit and that's what I did today. But, I walked back the way I came which meant that I had a short steeo decline and a very long incline. My heart rate got up and stayed up! It felt SO good! Even with my Achilles tendon stretches, I am feeling it a bit. We'll see how it is tomorrow morning. I ended the day with 10,040 steps! Woohoo! I should not celebrate yet. It really depends on what I can do tomorrow. I hope it's not going to be a setback...

Other than a taste of 93% fat free ground turkey at dinner, today was unintentionally a Meatless Monday. It felt great! Since I started Sparkpeople, the combination of health and budget concerns have made me cut even more back on meat. Thank God for Grocery Outlet or I could not afford to eat in any manner that approaches a healthy diet!

I did not add the weekend's mini rewards yet, but I know I have saved about $12 so far for drinking water, steps, strength training, etc. I have not yet decided what or when my first reward will be. I'm thinking about either a new pair of jeans or bras. Maybe when I reach 150. That's 22 pounds from now....That might be too far. I lose weight so slowly, that might not happen until next year (LOL!).

My Dad's widow lives in Owensboro, KY, so if I make it to the Rally, I will have to add some time to the trip so I can visit with her and my stepbrothers and stepsisters. I have not been back to Owensboro since Dad died 02/13/2005. I know they would be really disappointed to see that I put all the weight back on.

When I long distance planned Dad's 70th birthday party and then made it out there for his party, my stepmother was so blown away that I had lost so much weight that she could not stop talking about it! During the party, she kept telling everyone how much weight I had lost. (I was embarrassed!) What she did not realize is that people were looking at me and passing on the buffet we had laid out! We had leftovers for days!

After Dad died, I lost focus. I did not care. It took more energy than I had to get back on track. Without realizing it, over time, the weight came back on and here I am...And last month, with Ruby's death, I gained 5 pounds in 3 weeks. That was both amazing and sobering. It shows me I have work to do with coping skills and my internal dialog. It was amazing that the weight came back so fast and amazing that I slipped back into that mode. Sobering that the weight came back, that I slipped back into that mode.

But I am not going to dwell on that right now. I am driven to meet my September goals!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CARRAND 8/31/2010 9:18PM

    You sound like you got your Spark back. Good for you!

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LIBBYFITZ 8/31/2010 6:09PM

    Thank goodness for CHAOTICKITTY! So pleased to read that you have you're Spark back. emoticon And as you said enough of looking back, move forward and you will do it! emoticon

I am starting to feel better today, even managed to walk to the shops and market and bought home some very tasty silverbeet. emoticon

So will get myself sorted re this leader of the group tomorrow, or may be tonight, depends what time DH comes home.


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EUPHRATES 8/31/2010 4:00AM

    Losing a parent is a huge deal, and not easy to come back from - go you for finding focus and getting back on track!

I'm SO looking forward to meeting sparkfriends next May!

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JHADZHIA 8/31/2010 12:54AM

    Thanks to CHAOTICKITTY for giving you a Spark , I am so happy that it did! Hopefully, your 10K steps won't set your tendon back :( Keeping fingers crossed.
A healthy lifestyle change, by necessity, does include mental fitness. A lot of people do backslide on their diets, simply by reverting to old habits in times of stress or when life gets in the way. A true change is when your mind and body accepts that this healthy lifestyle is the way its going to be for the rest of your life, and then the good habits will happen all the time, no matter what, because they will have become second nature. But unfortunately, its a slow, long process to get your mind to accept this new reality. That is why Sparks says slow, one step at a time. You have it in you to do this!

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A Deliberately Low Key Weekend

Monday, August 30, 2010

I did almost nothing yesterday. I came home Friday feeling as if I had caught the cold that a coworker shared all week on my floor. He admitted people had been giving him a hard time about it and seemed absolutely oblivious to the fact that not everyone has enough accrued sick time to deal with an inconsiderately shared cold. ARGH!

CHAOTICKITTY shared the news that she joined a new Spark team for a Spark Rally in Cincinatti next May 21. She is hoping to attend and that news made me think about attending. I would LOVE to meet her and a bunch of other Sparkfriends!

I don't know if I will be able to make the trip, but the idea of attending should help me stay focused 'cause I would like to be a lot farther along on this journey than I am now.......

I'll be putting in too many hours this week, but the money will be helpful!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LIBBYFITZ 8/30/2010 11:18AM

    Glad you had a quiet weekend and rested, these colds are a pain in the b.....
I have one also, so been a bit slow on the team leader thing. Once I am well will look into it. Hope you are able to go to the rally, would be great for you to meet fellow Sparkies. emoticon

Comment edited on: 8/30/2010 11:24:43 AM

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CHAOTIC-KITTY 8/30/2010 1:46AM

  hey!! :) i would really enjoy meeting u!!! i need to start saving up because as i said in my blog... i really want to go! :) well...that wasnt very nice of your coworker making everyone sick like that. hope u are feeling better.


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EUPHRATES 8/30/2010 1:38AM

    I hope you're able to come! SQUEE! I love meeting online folks face to face! It should be a blast!
Hope you're feeling better today.

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JHADZHIA 8/30/2010 12:31AM

    Sounds like you really needed a day of rest, no crime in that! I hope you can find a way to attend that Spark rally, it would be fun for you to meet your Spark friends!
Get a good night's sleep!

emoticon emoticon

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