Stubbed My Toe on Pizza

Saturday, June 12, 2010

I am amazed my eyes are still open! I just got home from the company outing to see the San Francisco Giants host the Oakland Athletics. The Giants won 6-2! BF is an As fan, so it is always a good natured rivalry.

The ticket included dinner and the charter bus to the game for those who chose not to drive. Dinner was pizza and salad. I ate and ate and ate and ate. I was hungry for the first time in a very long time. I ate THREE pieces of pizza! Then I had a few spoonfuls of chocolate ice cream at the game. I don't quite know how to think about this yet. I don't feel guilt or regret, though I admit I may regret it on Sunday when I step on the scale. But I was hungry!

All the way home I thought about whether or not I would log in the food or just ignore SP. But I had to log in my steps, so..........I put it in. I was surprised to see I'd had over 2800 calories!

Tomorrow promises to be a busy day and I will try to stay on the low end of the calories.

I owe many comments and thoughts and responses to many of you. I hope to get caught up after I get some sleep. It is already past midnight!

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BEACHFIT10 6/13/2010 10:36AM

Pizza is my Achilles heel. It is SO good, and man is it tempting to have more than I should- especially dessert pizzas. You seem to be in the right mindset regarding this setback- you learned from your mistake, and moved on. Glad my blog was able to help you! Motivation is a daily struggle for me. I recommend following Megsfitness, she is a great motivator, as you can see from her comment on my blog. Report Inappropriate Comment

JAVALOVERTOO 6/12/2010 12:09PM

Pizza is evil, but oh so good! It's good that you logged it and now you will just adjust and it will be fine. Glad you got to see a great game! Report Inappropriate Comment

ISHIIGIRL 6/12/2010 9:55AM

Its ok to eat like that sometimes as long as its not a habit. When its a habit is when we find the scale moving consistently in the wrong direction. Don't stress too much about it. You had fun and that is what counts. Start fresh today. Report Inappropriate Comment

KAELIE 6/12/2010 9:42AM

Just be sure to get the cheese off of your toes (lol) Seriously, 3 pieces of pizza, in my previous life, that would have been the "starter". I think you did great, and you tracked it - that is awesome! I'd be sure to have lots of water today (to help with the sodium), but I think you did good girl! Jakeandnellie has it right - it was a good day - you enjoyed friends, fun, and food. As you know, this healthy lifestyle change is far more than calories consumed. The journey isn't just about the destination :) Having fun and LIVING is what it's all about! So glad you had a great time! Report Inappropriate Comment

JHADZHIA 6/12/2010 9:25AM

We are allowed to treat ourselves once in a while. Just as long as its not on a regular basis. I have not had pizza yet, but its not from lack of wanting it. Just no one in my life is having it when I am around, too many healthy eaters lol. Logging everything you eat is a must, its a good reminder of where we were and where we are going! Its nice to let loose and have some fun once in a while! Enjoy your weekend! Report Inappropriate Comment

UNIBOK 6/12/2010 8:46AM

If you are anything like me, before SP you would have had MORE than 3 pieces of that pizza. And definitely more than a few spoonfuls of ice cream. So I'd call that a success :-) BTW, I love the new stadium! When I'm visiting family out west, we like to take the ferry from Marin right to the game. It's a great night out. Glad you enjoyed yourself! You do deserve it, you know. Your friend, Unibok Report Inappropriate Comment

CAHUNO2 6/12/2010 8:33AM

Boy do I know that feeling!! Forget it! And have a good day and don't beat yourself up. Report Inappropriate Comment

LIBBYFITZ 6/12/2010 7:50AM

Maybe next time you know you are going out try and fill up on healthy food so hopefully you won't need to eat as much of the high calorie food. Report Inappropriate Comment

FITKAT2010 6/12/2010 5:59AM

It's too bad that social gatherings also have a lot of celebration using food that isn't good for us to eat. And we wonder why our country is so darn overweight and ill??? Next time prepare yourself, if you want to, and eat prior to the event. Report Inappropriate Comment

JAKEANDNELLIE 6/12/2010 3:03AM

Today was a good day for you because you enjoyed friends, fun, and yes, food. You need to do this once in a while to feed your soul! Besides, you had several days of not eating enough, so it will even out. Stay positive, Sheila Report Inappropriate Comment

I Think I Screwed Up! Should I Start Over?!

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Virtual journey update: 49.7 miles from Eureka (over 10K steps today WITH a sore heel)!

I aways try to get as many points as I can every day. Today, I read an article about the fitness tracker that I wish I had seen months ago. I think I have been gettting double credit for half the work, which is rather deflating. My pedometer differentiates between steps and moderate walking. I did not know until today that the SP tracker factors in routine walking. So I guess I have been over reporting my fitness minutes and getting false counts for burned calories. I know there is a variance between the tracker and the pedometer, so I have never focused on that.

Not sure what to do. Do I just record steps? Ignore steps and just log the moderate walking? I really don't get it! I guess that explains why I have been losing so slowly. I am just not active enough! I know that, but cannot do more than this right now. It bothers me to think of inaccuracy, but this will not make me stop walking or doing everything else I can.

Thank you, Sparkfriends, for all your support and love. You have helped me get through a very strange week!

I hope I may return the positive favor!

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ROX2013 6/13/2010 11:30PM

It is still confusing for me on how to count walking, I only count my steps and miles when I do the treadmill. I wouldn't startover. It is a mistake we all probably make at one time or another. Just keep on walking!!!! Report Inappropriate Comment

BEAR_GURL 6/11/2010 11:30AM

Can't say more than whats already been said, but stay positive and remember you are NOT alone: your SP pals have your back! I know that you CAN and WILL beat this: ) HUGS, Melissa Report Inappropriate Comment

SSCHULTZ59 6/11/2010 8:53AM

no need to start over.. just decide which you want to do and go from there. being as active as you can is good enough. I only track as excercise.. actual workouts. i figure all the walking i do for work, and every day life are free bees.. Report Inappropriate Comment

LIBBYFITZ 6/11/2010 1:49AM

Any walking that I do as an exercise I track on the saved routes that I walk. My cardio on the cardio section. Report Inappropriate Comment

JHADZHIA 6/11/2010 12:25AM

I had a Spark Coach tell me walking wasn't considered cardio exercise, and certainly every day walking is already accounted for in the basal metabolic rate of calories you burn every day. Cardio has to get your heart rate up into your fat burning workout zone. Most people don't walk fast enough for that. I don't walk slow, I try to race walk, which is cardio because it makes me sweat and breathe heavier. Otherwise walking doesn't do it as an exercise for me as I am so used to my heavy workouts with my DVD's and elliptical. It does kind of suck to be fitter because you have to keep pushing harder to burn fewer calories. Don't know how long my joints will keep up to all the pounding, I am starting to feel more and more aches. You would think I could just go to sleep and pass out for a good long time, but it never happens. A mystery to me for sure. I like exercising too much and can't really stand the thought of taking a day off, because its fun for me! How ever you decide to track it, is really up to you. I think step counting is really best. Report Inappropriate Comment

MISSY455 6/10/2010 11:33PM

I always track my steps in the top portion of the Fitness Tracker. Recording them there doesn't add anything to the lower portion or fitness points awarded. Then for the actual "walking" portion I enter my mileage under cardio. That adds the calories burned and the fitness points. I hope that makes sense. This way you can keep track of your steps walked everyday, and get points and calories burned for the exercise portion of the steps. I wouldn't start over, it will all even out over time. If your pedometer is anything like mine, you aren't getting credit for all the steps you are taking anyway. I have gotten to where I double check my miles on the "Map your Route" section of the Fitness Tracker because I end up missing almost a mile every time. That's about 2910 steps! Report Inappropriate Comment

I Gave Away the Peanut M&Ms

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Virtual Journey Update: As near as I can tell (I've lost a few days), I think I am 53 miles away from Eureka. I got in 4.1 miles and over 12K steps just walking at work and school. No pain, but my feet are swollen. Water retention is a hereditary issue. My paternal grandmother's ankles were a myth by the time I knew her.

I did not get to walk at lunch because I was timer at Toastmasters. That is my least favorite role, so I was pleased that I muffed only one call. I knew the meeting was going to be sloppy. The Toastmaster of the Day is a dear man, but he has a slapdash attitude about the protocol for the meeting. The agenda was not full, not all roles were filled and it was a waste of time except for a new member who delivered her very first speech.

I am still not back on track. I felt lousy most of the day and am still eating bland food. I miss my broccoli! Right now, I am a huge fan of instant mashed potatos!

Class tonight was tedious and not just because there are only 3 weeks left. We did not have class last week because the judge had bronchitis. The final exam has already been written and will be taken from the lecture tonight, next week's lecture and the four court opinions we have to read, three of which are very lengthy. Tonight's lecture was very dry and flat, almost as if he were just trying to make sure he said something that is already on the final...I also have a paper to write and really must churn it out this weekend if I want to incorporate feedback from my mentor into the final edition.

Then there is the party stuff. I still have so much to do and to buy. I am afraid I will run out of time, inspiration and money. I bought my cap and gown today. I am so glad I made it to the bookstore before class. They just started selling them and they already were low on the sizes.

THANK GOODNESS I FOUND SPARKPEOPLE! I am so glad I've lost 20 lbs. The robe would not have zipped had I not lost weight. Whew! I probably still look like a claret sausage, but definitely better than I would have! Yikes! I can't believe I graduate 3 weeks from Saturday! I'm not excited. I am too stressed.

Friday night is the company trip to the San Francisco Giants game against the Oakland As and I had treated myself to two tickets to the game. It includes dinner (pizza and salad) and a charter bus ride to the game. I bought them before a financial bomb exploded. I can't get out of them so I have to make the best of it. I think BF is going to flake again and I will end up going by myself. In truth, he does have a cold, but...it happens all the time. I should know better, but I keep hoping....ARGH!

Earlier this morning, I was walking down the hall and a wonderful coworker came up to me. Jean-Francois is French and has a delightful accent and effervescent personality. He handed me a coffee cup full of peanut M&Ms. I was pretty stressed and, even though I did not feel well, I so very easily could have popped one in my mouth right after another without stopping until there were none left. I took the cup back to my desk and set it on the counter. I could have put it in the coffee bar and they would have disappeared in moments. Didn't think of it.

Later, I sent a long email to one of my supervising attorneys about some department issues that came up in a meeting yesterday. It was something of a vent. I reread it before hitting send and still hit send. Then I thought I would go see him. I picked up the cup of M&Ms and took them with me. Kevin is about the size of a string bean and has a prodigious sweet tooth. I was going to knock on the door and tell him I was bringing him some energy to get through this long email, but he was not in his office. The door was open, so I put the cup near his laptop and went back to my desk, not having touched one M&M!

There was an event today that could have triggered a major binge. I really did not know how to react! Even though my heel was better today, when I stood up from my desk after sitting, I was a bit stiff. One of the managers in the finance department, who has an office near mine, recently had hip surgery of some type. She walks very stiffly. She was walking towards me while I was walking. She started laughing, as did another lady in finance. They made a joke about how we walk the same. I did not see the humor and did not laugh. The difference is Valerie's condition is temporary (at least I believe so) and mine is not. I have spent years trying to overcome my handicap to the point where it is not as noticeable. I do not like attention based on that and I sure don't appreciate being the source of humor. I did not say anything at the moment to either Valerie or Kathy because I did not trust my tongue. Neither of them seemed to realize what was going on, neither said anything to me the rest of the day! In the past, I would have stepped away from my desk, gone outside or behind a closed door, with a candy bar or three or something and felt sorry for myself. I did not do that. There was a fleeting thought, but it didn't stick long enough to even be a coherent idea, so that was amazing!

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JHADZHIA 6/11/2010 12:38AM

Good job staying away from the M & M's! Shows you are serious about this healthy lifestyle. High Five!! Valerie and Kathy probably had no clue they hurt your feelings. Unfortunately, most people don't get it. If you tried to approach them to clear the air, they would probably think you are being overly sensitive and can't take a joke, but who knows? You certainly don't want this to fester and continue to harbor feelings of resentment towards them. I would expect Valerie to be a little more sensitive as she knows what pain from a destroyed hip feels like. All the best with it. Report Inappropriate Comment

JAKEANDNELLIE 6/10/2010 1:02PM

Your progress shows in so many ways - in the actual weight loss, in your energy to accomplish all you do, in your willpower to avoid foods (like the m&m's) and in your honesty in your blogs. I do think you should think about talking privately to Valerie and Kathy about what they said and your feelings about it. I'm sure they were just not thinking - a lot of hurtful things are said in that way! Just be honest and tell them how hard you have worked to overcome it your entire life, and that living with a permanent disability is not something that should ever be joked about. Stress that you are not angry but that you just think they should be aware of how easily what someone says can hurt another. People need to be told when they hurt others, especially if it is done unintentionally. Sheila Report Inappropriate Comment

VICD25 6/10/2010 8:54AM

WTG! You've come a long way! Report Inappropriate Comment

NERVOUSWRECKIAM 6/10/2010 6:58AM

The previous blog said it all! Congrats on your weight loss! Denying M&M's! OMG...plain ones are my weakness...can't have them near me. Awesome strength to turn away from them! Report Inappropriate Comment

CAROLYNINJOY1 6/10/2010 6:27AM

Good job on overcoming the M&M's. I totally understand not wanting attention to be called to called to a difference about yourself, especially in a non solicited so-called humorous way. But the important thing is your reaction to it. Overcame it once, you can overcome it again. Bravo for you!!!!! Report Inappropriate Comment

NISA-JOE 6/10/2010 2:41AM

Congratulations for everything you accomplished today - your weight loss so far, your up-coming graduation, giving away the M&Ms (I could have eaten them all up), and practicing self-control when your colleagues were being insensitive. I'm sure you would be able to return to your broccoli soon. Report Inappropriate Comment

NANALD 6/10/2010 2:25AM

There is so much I could say about this blog. Because I know I am going to get off track let me first just compliment you on a great blog and on your ability to exercise self control on many levels. In an attempt to be positive I will resist my temptation to say anything about your lady friend coworkers. You see, it is one of several blogs I have read today where women have been hurtful to each other. Instead I will note that there are kind and not so kind people wherever we go. Our challenge is to recognize that the M&Ms of food and of humans aren't as sweet as they appear and aren't really what we want in our lives. Fact is, we can choose to surround ourselves with things that are much healthier for us both in terms of food and humans. Congratulation on your choices! Report Inappropriate Comment

Not Back Yet

Tuesday, June 08, 2010

I survived the day of work, but did not put in the extra time I needed to. I ended up not walking to the polling place, but I still got in more than 9600 steps. I still can't each much. Everything I eat makes my tummy hurt! I imagine this will pass. I sure did expect the days of eating bland food would continue after the procedure! I'm still not even hungry. This is weird.

Just out of curiousity, I stepped on the scale this morning and it said I had lost another pound. I am sure that's from the test, so I am not counting it unless it holds true this Sunday. If it does, this procedure will mean I lost 2.4.

My left heel has been hurting for days, so I was thrilled to be able to walk today. I could hardly move at all yesterday. As I took a short walk at lunch today, a coworker drove by, rolled down her window and said, "Way to go!" I thanked her and kept trudging. She was one of the ladies I spoke to about a month ago about my wonderful pedometer. All I can do is plant seeds, spread the Spark. Everyone knows that no one will make these kinds of changes until they are good and ready. I don't say anything unless anyone asks, but I don't hide what I am doing, so I am out there by example.

I hope I will be back on track nutritionally and in every way tomorrow...

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CMRAND54 6/9/2010 10:14PM

Way to go! I think you're exactly right that you can plant the seed with someone by setting an example, but the time has to be right for them to get started. Good for you for getting your steps in, even though you've had heal pain. You're an inspiration. Report Inappropriate Comment

CHAOTIC-KITTY 6/9/2010 8:43AM

good to hear that your heel is better. i hope your tummy feels better soon. good going on the walking. :) you will get back on track... be patient... and, kind to your body & soul. :) Report Inappropriate Comment

LIBBYFITZ 6/9/2010 5:53AM

All you can do is listen to you're body. When it is ready for food you will know. Have you tried just having soup? Glad to read that you're heel is getting better. Hope tomorrow is a better day for you. Report Inappropriate Comment

MISSY455 6/9/2010 1:25AM

I hope you are feeling 100% really soon! Way to go getting in 9600 steps especially when you aren't feeling well. Report Inappropriate Comment

NISA-JOE 6/9/2010 12:15AM

from me too! Report Inappropriate Comment

RIPPEDPAUL1 6/8/2010 11:39PM

you kept moving that's the key Report Inappropriate Comment

KELLYERIN 6/8/2010 11:21PM

I hope your tummy and heel feels better ASAP! Great job on the stepping! Report Inappropriate Comment

I Spread the Spark at the Hospital!

Monday, June 07, 2010

Today was the big day: my first colonoscopy. Even with the fast, I did not feel as hungry as I thought I would, though I felt a tiny bit queasy and lightheaded. That was overridden by the nerves. Everyone had told me the test would be the easiest part of this whole process, but I was still a bit nervous.

The team of caregivers they have in this group is fabulous. My intake nurse was Barbara. She is one of these cheerful people who talks through the whole intake process, which was calming for me. Interacting with her meant I did not have a chance to get more nervous. They took me a little bit early because the previous person cancelled. Barbara talked me through some forms and took me to the other room. During the intake process, she noticed I've lost 20 pounds! (My previous doctor with a different insurance company didn't EVER notice!). She asked me what I was doing and that opened the door for me to share about SparkPeople! I was stoked!

At this point, another nurse was supposed to take over, but she was not there, so Barbara stayed. Tessa did the needlework. I have great blood but terrible veins, so this usually means an unpleasant fishing expedition, but she did a great job. Turns out the doctor was the chief of this practice and he had a nice personality. I was abit surprised.

The procedure was the easiest part and, in between drifting off, I was able to see the scan. Kind of interesting. They found no polyps! I don't need to go through this for another 10 years. They did find a hemmorhoid. I was surprised and a bit alarmed. I understand those are painful. Doctor said it was probably aggravated by the cleanse + procedure.

They told me I would need to stay home today and they were not kidding! I was really nauseated afterwards which is supposed to be a rare side effect. I have eaten very little today and have regretted every bite because my tummy hurts! I hope I feel better tomorrow because I sure cannot afford another sick day!

BF caught my cold and I am not completely over mine...

I am not looking forward to work and school tomorrow and will aim to get to bed a little earlier tonight, even though I've slept a lot today!

Happy birthday, Mom! This was my Dad's second wife, mother of my youngest siblings. When I met Dad, I was thirteen, they were married and my brother was a year old. Later I learned that she was the one who got Dad to reach out to his children from his first marriage. Long story short, I ended up moving in with them for summers and going to boarding school during the school year. Had she not opened that door, I am absolutely certain my birth mother would have killed me before I was 18. While my maternal relations are strained, I am blessed to have several women step into the mother role for me. This Mom was one of the first. We are still close and I wish I could have been with her today!
(She lives outside of Albuquerque, New Mexico)

Happy Sparkversary, Chaotickitty! I know it's tomorrow, but, just in case I don't get to comment. (work and school tomorrow). I am SO grateful we are on this journey together!

Thanks to EVERYONE for your TLC comments about this colonoscopy. I could not finish the last 3 glasses of the prep stuff, but, had I not already been drinking a lot of water, it would have been so much tougher to chug. I did not enjoy any part of this procedure, even the sedated part, and I am not 100% sure I would do it again. I am grateful that I got a clean slate report! I am glad that I have 10 years before the next one. By then, I will have forgotten how awful it was and I'll probably do it again, just because of the diagnostic benefits. I hope this has not been too much information. I never shared anything like this prior to SP. Privacy is a good thing, but I am learning that I can gain strength from sharing and getting support and encouragement. I only hope I can return the favor!

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

VICD25 6/10/2010 8:57AM

Glad it's over for you! (mine's today). . . Take it easy and rest. It will take some time. (and did you EVER beleive you would miss broccoli????_) Report Inappropriate Comment

JHADZHIA 6/8/2010 2:18PM

I very happy to hear it all went smoothly and you got a clean bill of health! Shame about the hemorrhoid! I was surprised to be told I have them on my last physical, no wonder I don''t like sitting too long lol! Get some rest and recover! Report Inappropriate Comment

MOM2PACO 6/8/2010 10:07AM

I am so glad that you have a clean slate! Must feel good knowing that! You were so brave going, I would have been a nervous wreck and you were lucky to have such a wonderful nurse. All done and over with now. You can relax lol! Go to sleep early and get your rest for tomorrow. Eat light today, don't eat anything heavy as it might aggrevate you. My Mom passed away on January 23, 2010 - I love her soooo much and no Mom could ever take her place. I am lucky to have had her for 28 years, but she was only 54 and we lost her to uterine cancer....always get yourself checked. I am glad you found someone to take the place of your Mom, because everyone needs one and now I use my Grandma kinda...not the same but as good as it will get! Shes 75. You are lucky to have a great "MOM", my step mom is no where near a Mom to me. I am lost without my real Mom. You are one lucky girl to have so many people pop up to want to act as a mother to you! I will wait for the next report in 10 years lol!! Take care! Report Inappropriate Comment

NANALD 6/8/2010 9:35AM

Glad you got a clean bill of health! I don't think it is TMI--it may just have made some else realize that as much as they don't want to they can get through this or some other procedure. I hope you bounce back soon! Report Inappropriate Comment

CHAOTIC-KITTY 6/8/2010 8:27AM

I am so happy that you got a clean slate of health. :) you are such a strong woman.. and, you did great having to do what you needed to do! Thank you so much for sayin' Happy Sparkversary to me. :) That made me smile SO big. :) And, I am *very* happy that we are SP friends. :) I hope you are getting the rest you need now. You did great. :) Report Inappropriate Comment

UNIBOK 6/8/2010 6:48AM

Great news, Juneau! And it sounds like you handled the whole situation so well. How nice that the nurse noticed your weight loss, and how nice you were able to shine and spark even in such an awkward and uncomfortable situation. Feel better soon! Report Inappropriate Comment

NISA-JOE 6/8/2010 2:20AM

It's great that the colonoscopy went well and you managed to spread the spark. Rest up and hope you get well from the cold soon. Report Inappropriate Comment

LIBBYFITZ 6/8/2010 12:26AM

Phew I bet you are glad that is over and done with. Great news that there are no polyps. Hope you recover quickly. Report Inappropriate Comment