Sunday, January 08, 2012
My bestie sparkpal Michelene blogged the other day about how we love to hate the scale, this got me thinking. What is my earliest memory of the scale????? I was 8 or 9 and my mom took me for my annual exam at the pediatricians office he mentioned that I was about6 lbs ovewrweight, my mom put me on a diet that summer, I lost 5 pounds. I have included a picture from that summer. that is me on the far left. I hated that scale, because that scale was the enemy. Depending on what that scale said determined what I could eat and how proud my mom was of me.
My next scale memories are my least favorite. during my high school years my mom would put me on the scale and proceed to tell my father and sister if I gained weight, bear in mind I started high school at 97lbs. and ended at 118lbs. I also went from an A cup to a C cup. My mom told me constantly how "chuncky " I was. I hated that scale it became the measurement of my worth. Pic of Senior prom included sorry my eyes are closed
When I moved out of my parents place and into a dorm, I did not take a scale with me. That last thing I wanted to do was weigh in. Over time I did start to gain weight by the time I was pregnant with my son I weighed 151lb. my mom suggested I diet before my wedding. I looked at her like she was nuts, I was 2 mo. . pregnant , I couldn't diet now. she said " it won't hurt anything" . She did not go dress shopping with me, I took a friend who was the best and helped me find a dress that I liked.
Now over the years i have gained and lost alot of weight. And the scale can still make or break my whole day. Sometimes I avoid it for months, who needs the disappointment, some times I weigh my self 3 times a day, even at night so I can guess if I will weigh less tommorow morning. This relationship is not healthy. As I pull up my big girl panties and try to start being healthy again, I realized that I need a new way to measure my success. So I am limiting my self to weighing in just once a week, On Sunday. I am also going to measure myself and use this as a gauge. I will measure how I feel, and If I made good choices that day. That will be my scale. I am more than a number on a scale.
looking for a better standard, Julie.
Sunday, December 04, 2011
I am overweight. I am out of energy. Only I can change these sad facts. So I am back at square one. Today I will make better choices. Tomorrow I will wake up eat a healthy breakfast and go for a walk. I will drink more water, drive past the fast food restaurants and eat healthy snacks. This is what I will do now so that next week I will feel a bit better and next month my pants will be loser, and next year I will not be overweight and out of energy.
That is all. Jules
Saturday, September 17, 2011
Sunday was great, had dinner with in-laws at local Italian restaurant, I ordered a side portion of pasta, then only ate half, boxed up the rest right away. ( they have huge portions).
Monday was good but I was pmsing and really really tired. Boy did I nap.
Tuesday was good. I ate right, but did not go walking like I planned.
Wednesday- took my son to the ER, asthma was flaring up. He is fine. Ate well, and walked 2 miles.
Thursday, walked 1.75 miles before work, I was kinda bummed because it was raining and I had to walk on treadmill instead out outside, but brought my e-reader and read, so it went quickly.
Friday, Worked 1/2 day then walked 2 miles outside, ( no rain :) went to Chickfila, because It was lunch time and I was running errands. Got a Char-grilled chicken sand, small fry and unsweetened tea.
Today was long at work, glad to be home, now off to relax .
Week three starts tomorrow.
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Well as I sit here and slowly sip my nonfat, non whipped Tall Pumpkin spice Latte, I think about this week. It was my kids first week back to school, I made a decision to take advantage of this freedom by going back to the gym. Thanks to sparkpeople I signed up to walk my first 5k in October. Started training this week it helped to motivate me to go to the gym this week. This week I pmsd like mad and still managed to stick pretty much to my nutrition plan. Overall I think I did pretty well. I am looking forward to kicking more booty next week. Celebrating non scale victories (MICHELENE :) and maybe even running a little more this week. Eventually the scale will catch up with me.
Tuesday, September 06, 2011
I let myself down, I went back to eating in an unhealthy way, I quit moving, gave up and hid. But now, It is time to forgive myself and move on. I have decided that in order to accomplish the healthy goals I have set for myself I have to start looking at the 70 lbs. I lost and then regained in the most positive way I can. Losing that weight taught me that I can lose weight and be a healthy person, and it helped me connect with some wonderful people who have remained a support system though everything, that in itself is priceless. So I am sorry for letting myself down, for being weak and giving up, but I forgive myself and walk toward better things.
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