Monday, August 13, 2012
She is heavy set, she smells bad,her bra strap always sliding down her shoulder, her teeth are bad, her shoulders are slumped over, her clothes have faded stains on them, her hair is a mess, she always has a child in tow. The child must belong to someone else, she is clean her clothes are neatly pressed, her hair is silky blond ,clean & combed, but this child is her grade school child!!! This unkept woman takes care of her sickly mother, & her grandmother that is bedridden, she also takes care of her sister that is a drug addict, her nephew had no place to live she took him in also. The rest of the family comes to her for help or a place to stay, or a home cooked meal. She is tired looking it is in her eyes in her face, she talks so loving to her daughter in a soft voice. She gives of herself, she does not seek medical attention, she neglects her health to give the extra money to her family
When she walks on by others stare at her, snicker behind her back.They do not know the loving kind woman she is. I know this woman, I wish others would not judge someone by their appearance, because of this woman I learned not to be judgmental.
Sunday, August 12, 2012
I hold on to material things ,even scraps of paper that loved ones that wrote a message to me. I feel if I take it from my home I am getting rid of a part of them. Is this foolish of me to think such thoughts? I have boxed up so many other things & gave away, but I still hold on to things from the past that I have not used in years. I have things that I say one day I may use or will this not look pretty sitting out at a different time. but they are wrapped up with loving care thinking perhaps next year I will set it out. I have every piece of clothing I bought my nephew from the time he was a baby until he graduated. I know exactly what he was doing in his clothes he wore when he was a baby,toddler & in early school grades. I feel I am throwing a memory of what he did away or even giving them away would make me cringe. I have gave away a lot at one time of other household items, but I need to finish up I am having a very hard time with the other things that are still here.
Friday, August 10, 2012
My beloved brother Bobby in California has cancer he has since February Last night the phone rang Mom says that is Bobby calling , ( she talked about him all day today, she is 82 } I said as I was going for the phone how do you know? she said,' I just know it is. ' The voice on the other end was him. We all talked to him He said,' I am not interrupting dinner am I ?' I said ,'no' he ask what we were having I said,' grilled salmon,grilled asparagus & grilled potato, 'he said ,'I wish I was there to have salmon with all of you. 'My other brother talked to him then as I went to tend to the grill, Mom went out to look at the garden. all of a sudden I hear " I came for some salmon" Mom left out a big cry there he stood. he was driving to my home all the while. We were so happy he flew in from California drove up from Philly from the airport.He said he had to come because he gets so sick from the chemo he restarts it on Tuesday he has it every day except 6 days he is off of it out of every month. We had a beautiful time together. we all stood in a circle holding each other as my brother David said a beautiful prayer. Mom told us she just new in her heart it was him on the phone, & all day she kept talking about him. Seeing him was wonderful!!
Saturday, August 04, 2012
Right now my getting fit is slowing down to a consistence of molasses in February dripping from a sap tree.!! I sure wish I had the pace of the March winds blowing in . With the terrible heat & humidity here in Pa. I sure wish my fat would roll off me like butter dripping from a hot ear of corn in August. How are you fairing???
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
I had the urge to eat something the other night, I had calories to spare,but did not want to go over. I opened the refrigerator & STARED at the fully loaded shelves. MMM !! What would it be, you see before I would NOT have thought about it I would have grabbed & devoured. This time I thought about my choices, so I choose 1 slice of low fat cheeses & I took 6 lettuce leafs from the garden & wrapped the cheese in it just like an egg roll. I had that with 16 ounces of ice cold water. I was completely satisfied. After I was done eating I examined what I did, number one I thought before I reacted, I did not just hurriedly act on impulse to eat anything. second I acted on my choice, third I felt emotionally good what I did. Another example I love cinnamon graham crackers slathered with Nutella, & a large glass of milk. The choice I changed on this treat I took half a cracker with 1/2 tablespoon Nutella spread it on & put the other half of cracker on top, no milk but ice cold water. I was completely satisfied. The key for me that I must continue to do, is STOP at that very moment when the food urges come & examine the whole outcome. Do nothing on IMPULSE, that gets me in trouble every time. Before I go to sleep I always reexamine my whole day trying to see where I could have done better. This time I went to sleep with a smile because you see I did not dismiss my choices , I felt emotionally good. Every day I am going to think of what I will eat & try to modify the foods , but still have a taste.
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