Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Waking with a jolt of energy I shot up out of bed like a rocket, Gosh I thought to myself what has gotten into you ? Then as I briskly walked to the bathroom & stood there looking full view of my body I knew why. After taking a long look at my body ( Read previous blog ) I quickly got dressed, but then I said wait a minute you are not going to change your mind think why you are doing this. ( that is what I would do in the past hurry & get dressed because I would be talking my self right out of it ). I started out with my walk , I could hear & see the birds singing their morning songs, I said," oh little birdie are you greeting me on this fine summer morning??? I saw a huge Crane at the rivers edge walking so stately & then bending down (as if taking a curtsy to a Queen) getting a drink of cool water. I smelled the Queens Anne flowers as I walked on by, they smell like carrots brought back memories when I was a child making mud cakes with them trying to feed my brothers. I had to chuckle a little bit , Then I saw a Weeping Willow tree with all it's branches touching the ground as if it has the weight of the world on it's branches, the sun was shining through the leaves , I thought yes there is light at the end of everything , The purple & yellow flowers were sprinkled throughout the fields. I came upon a swirl of tiny birds all flying just above my head I thought they are flapping their little wings so vigorously, I said," oh little birdie I am almost done with my walk" I pretended they were using their wings clapping for me because I made my morning walk that I had not done so in a long long time.
Sunday, July 22, 2012
Yesterday as I stood before the long mirror with my back towards it I peeled off my clothes I then held a hand mirror I had to see my back side I stood there & examined my backside, before I would quickly glance away as if I was turning the pages of a boring book,& skipping to the next page. I saw each fold & roll, I touched it & felt the doughy folds of fat. I slowly turned to the front I thought gee it looks better in the front, then I slowly turned to the side. I was a gasp . There it was my stomach protruded out like beach ball , my sides, had rolls of fat like a cascading waterfall, my breast hung like a Baltimore Oriole nest, My jaw line drooped like a turkey gobbler. I stood for a long time turning & touching examining getting the feel of what it felt like in flesh & in thoughts . You did this to yourself, now you will put yourself back together. I know I am older & we lose our elasticity in our body, but I know I can get rid of the excess fat. I want my back side to be curvy with the sides curved in giving me a waist,I want the beach ball stomach to deflate, I want the jaw & neck line to be pulled in with my chin protruding out just a tad. I want my breast to be like a Robins nest round not droopy. Every day before dressing I am going to examine my nakedness. I am not going to quickly glance away I am coming face to face with it. I really belief by seeing this it will slowly put the thougt in my mind every time the late night eating or over indulging
Thursday, July 12, 2012
When the evening is drawing in & I lay back on my favorite porch recliner, I hear the flowing of the water fall from the fountain underneath my window pane & I watch the Robins & the Jenny Wrens flutter back & forth & call to one another like they are saying " this is my spot for the night !! " I make promises to my self in the twilight of the evening that tomorrow when the fog is still lying low like a blanket covering my town , that I will go out for a long walk underneath the morning fog & have the dew kiss my face with each step. I know it does I walked it before in time past, I know how exuberant I felt when I arrived back home, I miss this, but what is stopping me from going under the umbrella of morning fog & kisses of the dew? I think at times if I shall start it will be a life time to continue, I am afraid I cannot continue every day so therefore I roost but never take flight as the Robins or the Jenny Wrens.
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
My brother introduced me to this awesome store called Finders Keepers & it is a keeper!!!!
I bought so many clothes the two times I have been there. The clothes I bought are name brand all the original price tags on the clothes. The highest I paid $ 24.00 & the lowest I paid was $ 6.99. Land End work out shoes was the highest, the names I bought in tops & slacks are Calvin Klein,Lands End, Jones New York Signature, The Quacker Factory,Rafaella, I will not spend top dollar when I am working to get down in size. so this is a great place to shop. The shop keeper does have slightly worn clothes , besides all the knew ones, but she is very particular what she takes into her shop. The great thing about this it is 30 minutes from my home!!!!
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