Wednesday, April 11, 2012
I have amazing will power. Seriously. I can grin and bear nearly anything.
During root canals, my dentist has told me that it's amazing I was able to go so long without treatment, as my teeth were horribly inflamed and painful. But I had set my mind to it, and did it.
11 years ago, I had major surgery and even coded on the table. A few hours after being transferred to the surgical floor from the ICU, I asked a nurse to help me out of bed so I could walk. The nurses said they were shocked at how far and often I walked after major surgery.
Once I start a project, I don't quit until I'm done. I'll spend an entire day painting or gardening in order to reach a good breaking point, rather than leave a project hastily abandoned.
I have amazing will power. I know this. And I have used it to succeed in many areas of my life. But it just hasn't worked for me with weight loss. I rev myself up, and will power takes me a certain distance. Then I become overwhelmed, frustrated, and simply give up. I have spent the last 20 years feeling like a failure as a human being because of this.
But I have learned something in the past few months. Weight loss is NOT ABOUT WILL POWER! Will power is great. Setting your mind on a goal and just gritting your teeth to carry you thru.... wonderful. But weight loss isn't about a specific task. It's about a life long way of treating your body. Will power isn't going to carry ANYONE through a lifetime struggle on any particular issue.
What I've learned is that since weight loss and maintenance requires a life long commitment, it will require a plan. When I married my husband, I knew that I was making that kind of commitment. I spend a lot of time thinking about how I was approaching my marriage. What my values and beliefs about marriage and this relationship were. What I would do if/when things went wrong and got really tough.
I find myself approaching my health/weight loss in this way as well. What is important to me in my health? What am I going to do to achieve those goals? And what am I going to do when the journey gets tough? My plan: eat a balanced, nutritious, reasonable diet and exercise. I am building habits that carry me through a bad case of the "don't wannas". I am increasing my knowledge and understanding of nutrition and fitness. Just as my husband and I have build habits into our marriage that help carry us thru, so I'm doing with my health. This isn't will power. This is a carefully formed and executed plan to develop healthy habits.
I'll save the willpower for other areas of my life..... like getting that backyard patio put together.
Monday, April 09, 2012
I had my game plan all set for yesterday, and theoretically, I did really well. I didn't track my food, but when I guestimate it, I'd say I still stayed within my calorie range.
Breakfast was my usual oatmeal, then we headed off to church.
Lunch consisted of ham, green salad with low fat ranch dressing, fresh fruit salad, and roasted asparagus ... ALL these are part of my usual diet. BUT! I indulged in about 1 cup of my mom's potato salad (it just doesn't get better than mom's!), 2 deviled egg halves (made with low fat mayo), and 1 cupcake.
And I felt AWFUL! Just plan gross all afternoon. Bloated, gassy, tummy aches, lethargic, etc. Just felt awful.
About 7 pm, I was hungry (hadn't eaten since the cupcake at 3pm). I made a bagel thin with skinny cow cream cheese (my absolute fav item right now) and lean turkey meat. It's 200 calories. That was my whole dinner.
I finally went to bed about 10:30, knowing that I wasn't going to feel any better no matter what I did.
This morning I am back on my usual routine. I eat small amounts frequently. That's what works for me. And I feel MUCH better doing that. I also had time in my schedule to hit the gym already this morning. That also made me feel better.
Ugh.... next time I want to indulge, I'm going to remember how awful it makes me feel. And I didn't even TOUCH my daughter's candy!
Saturday, April 07, 2012
This is my first major holiday since I got myself back on track in January. I've gone back and forth about how to approach the meal tomorrow, and all the goodies and treats we usually do. But I think I've come up with a plan that I'm okay with.
First ... I'm not tracking my food tomorrow. I've given myself permission to do this, with a few guidelines that should help me keep my intake reasonable.
Second... Breakfast will be my usual fare of oatmeal. Start out with some good fuel.
Third... A few simple changes to lighten up the meal:
Instead of the usual high sugar fruit salads (usually with marshmallows) I am opting for a fresh fruit salad of strawberries, grapes, bananas, apples, and pineapple. Simple and healthy.
I bought a lean ham without glaze that I'm heating in the crockpot.
We are having a green salad loaded with veggies that I can pair with my Cottage Cheese Ranch dressing (Sooooo good for about 40 calories for 1/4 cup).
Instead of some veggie with bacon or butter added, I'm roasting some asparagus.
I'm lightening up the deviled eggs with low-fat mayo.
My mom is making potato salad but I will keep my portion size small.
I've decided to skip a bunny cake that leaves us with a ridiculous amount of left over cake, or lemon meringue pie loaded with calories. Instead, we bough some cutely decorated cupcakes. Dessert for 200 calories? I can do that. My daughter is thrilled with them, and I'm not stuck with a bunch of left over cake.
Fourth.... After dinner, I'm back to my regular caloric intake.
Anyway.... that's MY game plan. I'm okay with it. What's your plan?
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