JOYFULJUDYLYNN   19,203
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JOYFULJUDYLYNN's Recent Blog Entries

Progress

Saturday, February 11, 2012

Today I feel something that I have felt little of as my weight ballooned.... SELF PRIDE. This morning, I did 3.51 miles on the elliptical, in 45 minutes, set to interval (1 and 8 resistance). This is HUGE for me!!!

6 weeks ago, in spite of a panic attack in the parking lot, I joined a gym. That day, I nearly fell off the machine after 10 minutes (with zero resistance). 6 weeks. I've lost 15 pounds in that time, and while that's a decent amount, there are days that I am frustrated it isn't much more. But today it's all too evident that in that time I've also GAINED muscle, stamina, coordination, and endurance. Lost fat. Gained those things that are essential to overall fitness... and great for my self esteem.

Today my husband and I are hitting a movie ("The Vow"). I can't wait. I'm sneaking a healthy snack in my purse, and plan to buy a bottle of water. That's my plan to avoid the umpteen calories in the popcorn I usually get.

Tonight we are headed to PF Changs for Hubby's birthday dinner. I've looked at their menu, figured out their portions, and have a plan. Yes, I will likely go slightly over my calories today, but I also burned an extra 300 today. I feel good about it.

No more telling myself "I can do this!".... instead I shout inside my head in victory, "I AM DOING THIS".

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

STACIA_ANGEL 2/12/2012 5:52PM

    That's awesome!
emoticon

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TRACYNOTGIVINUP 2/12/2012 8:33AM

    Congrats on all you have achieved. 15 pounds in 6 weeks is awesome be proud. Love your plan for the movies I hope you enjoyed your night out.

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PRAYING4THIN 2/11/2012 10:37PM

    You are doing great and being able to see the bigger picture with the gained muscle and stamina is awesome. GL at dinner tonight and the movie!

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ALPHASENIOR 2/11/2012 2:19PM

    Wow, Lynn! That's not just progress, that's declaring war! You are really going at it! You are an inspiration and motivator! So glad I read this blog, now I have to go get going!

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2BFREE2LIVE 2/11/2012 1:48PM

    YES your doing this, your well on your way to success!! Stay focused on your dreams and goals and they will come true. Sandy

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MENNOLY 2/11/2012 1:23PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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Stressful day

Thursday, February 09, 2012

What started as a routine mommy-duty activity of calling the pediatrician this morning, turned into a nightmare for me. My 3 year old has been falling lately... like her balance is a little off. And we've noticed a time or two where were eyes aren't quite aligned. I called to schedule a check up just to talk to the pediatrician about it. Soon, the nurse called back, asked a bunch of questions, and before I knew it, the Dr was sending us straight to the ER. He wanted her to have an MRI or CT scan to rule out a brain tumor which manifests in children at this age, displaying these symptoms.

Now... I already knew that was a SLIGHT, OUTSIDE posibility. 3 years ago, my nearly 5 year old nephew died from DIPG, a brain tumor that first manifested in a similar way.

The ER staff examined my beautiful girl, and declared the scans unnecessary and sent us home. I called the pediatrician back and told them what occurred. We now go back to see the pediatrician tomorrow for evaluation and possible referral for a scan.

Needless to say... I didn't get a work out in today. I stayed in my calorie range, tho. And spend my day a nervous wreck.

We're praying that it is a simple answer..... inner ear trouble, vision issue, or the fact that my child INSISTS on walking on her tip toes most of the time. We shall see. I know she is in God's hands, but right now my mother's heart is terrified.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

STACIA_ANGEL 2/12/2012 5:54PM

    emoticon

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PRAYING4THIN 2/11/2012 10:41PM

    (((Hugs))) I will be praying for your little one. God is always in control and hopefully as you said its just something simple and small.

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TRACYNOTGIVINUP 2/10/2012 8:39AM

    Hugs to you friend. I certainly will be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers that nothing serious is found and that all is well. My two year old loves to walk on his tip toes too! Many positive thoughts your way!

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MENNOLY 2/10/2012 8:01AM

    How horrible! I pray that there is not anything seriously wrong. God bless you all! emoticon

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COOKINGGRANNY 2/9/2012 11:45PM

  Sending prayers for your family during this stressful time. I know how hard this is on a mother's heart but keep the faith and hopefully a simple answer will be the result. emoticon emoticon

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My jeans are too big

Monday, February 06, 2012

I found this fact causing me to smile most of the day. I think it's almost time to pull out the next size smaller.

Those 2.75" I lost in my hips in January is showing. Go me!

My husband asked what I wanted for V-Day and my b-day in a couple months. I told him additional sessions with my trainer. emoticon Who is this girl the mirror????

Shhh..... I think I like her!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PRAYING4THIN 2/11/2012 10:45PM

    You go girl!

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PANSYMAKEHAY 2/7/2012 12:39AM

    emoticon Totally Awesome! You are rockin' your program. :D

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PANSYMAKEHAY 2/7/2012 12:38AM

    Yay for you!!!! You're rockin' your program, lady! :D emoticon

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TARAFROMTX1 2/6/2012 10:17PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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TRACYNOTGIVINUP 2/6/2012 9:37PM

    Woohoo that's awesome! Enjoy pulling out those smaller sizes!!! Way to.go!!!

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2BFREE2LIVE 2/6/2012 9:29PM

    emoticon

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JULIETTECAKE 2/6/2012 9:28PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

Congratulations on the inches lost! I especially like the part about liking the girl in the mirror.

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LACATUSCO74 2/6/2012 9:01PM

    GREAT JOB

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SPIFFDEB 2/6/2012 8:59PM

    Fantastic!! emoticon

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Visualizing myself

Saturday, February 04, 2012

Yesterday, I told my trainer that my HUGE goal right now is to get under 200 pounds. I graduated high school at about 220. I don't think I've been below 200 since I was about 16. Sad, but true.

I was a chubby child/adolescent, and the time in my life when I was "thin" was but a blink of an eye, it seems. At age 13, I went camping with a friend's family for several weeks. Walking and swimming constantly mixed with a young metabolism, and I dropped weight quickly. I was 5'4", and weighed 117 pounds. I stayed about that weight for about a year. As stressors, traumas, and tragedies happened, the weight came on.

In some small corner of my mind, I saw the weight as an insulator. I loathed it... hated being fat... but it also gave me protection. Protection from those that would hurt or abuse.... an excuse to not have to be "perfect".... and an easy, accessible coping skill that never turned me away. But I always saw the "true" me in my mind's eye, underneath. Swallowed by the pounds and pounds of fat, "I" was still in there.

At my highest weight (420#), I hit my rockbottom and realized that nothing about my weight was protecting me anymore, but rather killing me. I shed 170#. And saw glimpses of "me" in the mirror. Then, of course, I gained about 70# back thru a difficult pregnancy and even more difficult recovery.

So, this time I'm taking a holistic approach. No more surgery. No drastic starving. Adding fitness components of cardio and strength training. Taking time to allow myself to feel strong and able. Seeing my mileage on the machines increase, my stamina improve. And taking the time to allow myself to think about WHY I have never been able to allow myself to thrive. Rather, I have hidden myself away within myself.

As I said... in my mind's eye, I've always seen "me" inside my body.... an inner core if you will. And as I approach this (hopefully LAST) attempt to shed my outer self, I an visualizing a ice sculpture and a large, ungainly block of ice. The ice isn't particularly attractive, but inside, the artist sees what it is truly meant to be... the beauty that is already there, just waiting to be released by shedding it's excess.

I, too, am working to shed my excess. But not just excess fat. Excess fears. Excess anxieties. Excess self doubts. God and I are working are shedding my excess to release the true me... the epitome of my being that is just too insulated to be appreciated right now. But I rest assured that in the Master's eye, He sees me as He created me... perfect and whole. He sees the potential just waiting to be released.

In January, I shed nearly 15# of excess. I have 93 pounds to go to be under 200#, and 43 to hit my first goal. It's a lot, and nearly overwhelming to imagine. Then I visualize a block of ice, chipped away.... some larger pieces of ice falling away, but also fine dustings and shavings. Not everything can happen in big acts... the finest masterpieces require the most time and attention.

We are all masterpieces, just waiting to be seen for our potential.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

2BFREE2LIVE 2/6/2012 11:21AM

    emoticonweight loss for the month of January, your doing it the right way a pound at a time and chipping away at the total.
Set those small goals of 10 pounds at a time and you will be surprised how fast you will reach each mini goal.
Your doing a great job.
We are all here to support you along the way. emoticonfor a great January. Sandy

Comment edited on: 2/6/2012 11:22:07 AM

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PRAYING4THIN 2/5/2012 4:07PM

    I absolutely love the idea of the block of ice and what is underneath. We will become what we are meant to be and until then what is inside of us is the way God views us. This blog was very motivational to me! Good luck, you've got this


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TRACYNOTGIVINUP 2/5/2012 11:11AM

    What a wonderful blog and with this attitude you will shed all your weight so everyone will see what you are visualizing. You can and will do it and I believe with this site for support also keep it off.

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MENNOLY 2/5/2012 11:08AM

    emoticonYou are doing great! One day at a time. emoticon

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STACIA_ANGEL 2/4/2012 11:03PM

    Beautifully said!
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ROCKED the monthly check in!!!

Thursday, February 02, 2012

I am ridiculously PROUD of myself!

I met with my trainer today. In 30 days, I've lost 14.6#!!!
Waist - Down 1 inch
Hips - Down 2.75 inches!!!
Thigh - .75 inch
upper arm - .5 inch

I worked HARD for each pound and inch! I've done diets before (and been pretty successful at times), but this is the first time I've ever added fitness. And I'm seeing the difference... for that I'm excited.

I can do this. Oh wait! I AM DOING THIS!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PRAYING4THIN 2/5/2012 4:08PM

    Awesome!!!! Congrats!

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WILDRICE99 2/3/2012 10:03PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

...they don't have enough icons!!!

Keep up the great work!

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TRACYNOTGIVINUP 2/3/2012 10:23AM

    Way to.go. you are not just doing.it you are rocking it!!!!!

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TARAFROMTX1 2/2/2012 10:24PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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2BFREE2LIVE 2/2/2012 7:13PM

    emoticonJOB!!

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MENNOLY 2/2/2012 7:05PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticonKeep it up!

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CUISINEEXAMINER 2/2/2012 6:55PM

    You so inspire me ... thanks!

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LOSINIT36 2/2/2012 6:54PM

    emoticon That's awesome! So inspiring! And reminded me I have to measure myself. Keep it up :)

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SUGARPIE54 2/2/2012 6:54PM

  emoticon emoticon

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