Wednesday, May 18, 2011
I am not going to be able to attend the Spark Rally this weekend. With the recent damage to our home because of some flooding, this just happens to be the weekend the insurance adjsuter and a few contractors will be coming by. As good as I am I cant be in two places at once.
I was really looking forward to meeting some of you. Maybe some other time.
I hope those of you attending have a really good weekend
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Did you ever get one of those phone calls that made you smile the moment you recognize the caller ID? An old friend/client called me Thursday afternoon and after the traditional exchange of pleasantries he said ďI called to thank you for helping me learn about how to set good goals.Ē He went on to say how he had completed college, after being away from school for over twenty years. I knew he was in school but we hadnít talked in a while and I wondered how all that was going for him. Now I had an answer, LOL. After we finished talking my mind did an inventory on my own goals and how my perception of them has changed since joining Spark.
A year and a half ago I wanted to lose weight, a hundred pounds to be exact. Between me and you I didnít think I could do it. Iíd lost weight before and put it back on. I wonít bore you. You know the story. Most of us live it on a daily basis. Just substitute my name with yours. We all have ďbeen there and done that.Ē Well Iíve lost sixty eight of the hundred pounds and Iíve done that before also. Hereís whatís changed: Iím not fixated on the number, I fixated on being healthy and on changing how I live. Most recently Iíve learned the lesson that this planet is not mine. Iím a guest here. There are all sorts of things been here longer than me and will be here long after I leave and that I really need to respect the planet. I know by becoming healthy in body mind and spirit that Iíll reach my goal weight. Oh it may take a while but honestly, where am I going? There is a much larger picture here than ďjust John,Ē and as I embrace that I get closer to being whole.
I started my exercise program by believing a lot of sweat and accumulating cardio minutes would make me leaner and meaner. Today, after some injuries and some really good advice from a lot of people I am participating in an exercise process that is consistent and healthy. I had to stop running for a while because Iíd done some damage to my legs and feet. Yesterday I ran two miles for the first time in over two months. My dreams of 10Kís and half marathons are pretty much evaporated. Right now Iím going to be satisfied with 5Kís. I may never run more than a 5K and thatís OK. I have discovered spinning and I love it and now that I can move around better my trainer and I are going to start working on my core.
Iíve lost a lot of good friends here. Iíve lost people who got stuck, just like me, and gave up. I miss them. They became ashamed and embarrassed and they quietly went away. They remain a source of motivation for me because I will not give up. I may get stuck and this may take a while to complete and I will have set backs but Iím not quitting!
My goals have changed and in many, many ways thatís how it should be. Currently I am in the middle of Day 5 of no diet soda. Iíve learned that this is very similar to quitting smoking. There are two times a day I crave a diet soda --- early morning and between four and five in the afternoon. I have learned too, that there is a really beautiful peace developing inside of me. Itís a calm quiet feeling.
Iím not going to be one of those people who smiles for the camera and says ďthis is a breeze.Ē It isnít, LOL. I am breaking out all over my body with small pimples. They are not painful or anything but they are part of the aspartame withdrawal. (Itís nice when you and your doctor go to the same church and you walk out of Mass this morning and you start asking her questions!) I live with panic anxiety disorder and I have had a few monumental anxiety attacks in the past few days including one around 1:00 AM. All part of the process.
Iím doing well drinking water flavored with lemon or lime and un sweet tea. Mostly Iím proud of me that Iím doing this. Whatever goals you are working on, you should be proud of too. You are a god example to me.
Thank you for your love and support
Friday, May 13, 2011
Iíll have to admit I was a bit over whelmed by all the advice I received on becoming sugar free. My first inclination was to try to rationalize my way out of making the commitment by telling myself ďthis is way too much to do.Ē Since I know how I think I realized that this fit of drama would be followed by a moment of lucidity. I was right.
Iíve decided to break this down into increments I can deal with. There is no way I can do all of it cold turkey, so I devised a plan. I had my last diet soda Tuesday evening. Thatís where I am going to begin. Itís been two days, seven hours, twenty minutes and a handful of seconds but whoís counting, right? I quit smoking six years ago and I did it cold turkey. I took a calendar and for every day I didnít smoke I put a huge X through the date. When I was really tempted I asked myself, ďDo you really want to have to start over?Ē After a month it got easier. I decided to employ the same strategy with diet soda. I have proudly place two bi ďXísĒ on a calendar. Itís my motivation.
Physically I feel pretty good but I am having some emotional withdrawal symptoms similar to tobacco withdrawal. I know in a week or so they will dissipate. Pray for Joan. She told me this morning she is ďREALLY looking forward to spending part of next week with her three sisters.Ē I have noticed that I am bit more regular when I use the restroom which is always a plus.
I have replaced the cookies, cakes and pies with fresh fruit for right now. Once I get the diet soda habit controlled I will tackle the next step. I am eating fresh red grapes, fresh pineapple, and fresh apples. I am drinking water and unsweetened ice tea. I tried herbal tea, which tastes great ---- However I am spending enough time in the bathroom as it is.
Thatís where Iím at right now. Itís interesting to correlate the diet soda and cigarettes because I find myself wanting a diet soda at certain times just like I wanted a cigarette. In a way, Iím glad that I had that experience because I know if I focus and balance for a few minutes the urge goes away. Homeostasis is never easy, but well worth the price.
Iíll keep you posted.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
I want to thank those of you who took the time to share their thoughts, ideas and most importantly their experiences on removing sugar from their diet. I really appreciate all the insights, and the resources. I have already started reading and crafting a plan.
To be honest with you the hardest part is going to be the Coke Zero. I started counting in my head how many I have per day and when I drink them and I was amazed in a scary sort of way. I didnt know I drank THAT MUCH diet soda. Whats worse is that I always buy one right when I finish a work out. I havent always drank diet soda. I used to drink plain old unsweet tea and I got lazy because the diet soda was readily availible and I didnt have to do anything more that twist a cap.
I can do this but I'm no different than anyone else. Change sucks and its scary. I know, though, that I have many people who care and who will support me.
Thank you guys for the love and all the input
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