This, That and Oh Yeah........ The Other Thing

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Sharing the fun and meaningless things about your life is part of creating the balance. I hope you weren’t looking to be inspired today and it might be a big stretch to say you will be entertained; however, every now and then I like to write about nothing in particular. It’s my notion of fun. (Not much of a life I know. But on the bright side TMZ will never catch me in an after-hour’s club with Lady GaGa)

I have had trouble sleeping lately. I’m a light sleeper to begin with so it doesn’t take much to wake me up and keep me up. My doctor knows I will not take any pills. Matter of fact, I don’t take anything stronger than extra strength Tylenol. One of my sons gave me a tea pot as a Christmas gift and I have been in seventh heaven since Saturday. There is nothing like a steaming hot cup of tea to set my mood straight. One of my DDIL told me that there was an herbal tea that relaxed you and helped you sleep. I purchased a box.

I enjoy my tea strong so I usually use two bags in a large earthenware cup I got at a vineyard in Weston, WVA. It’s balanced and weighted and stays warm. The tea I drank is called Sleepy Time and it has something in it called “valerian” Valerian is a natural herb the ancient Greeks and Romans used to relax themselves. (According to the box…..) I have a few Spark friends in Italy and in Greece and now I know why they always look so well rested!!!

I brewed a cup, sat down and enjoyed. This was roughly seven thirty. At eight fifteen I was ready for bed. The angels rocked me to sleep. Joan came to bed around midnight and told me this morning I rolled over slightly and told her to be careful not to step on the elves. Al righty then…… (There should be one of those “Do Not Operate Heavy Machinery” warnings on the side of the box)

I woke up about an hour ago feeling very refreshed but truth be told I could have slept another hour or so. I’m not foggy right now but I am not fully awake either. I did sleep well though. Tonight I think I will only use one tea bag for a full cup of water. I didn’t really believe this stuff would work. Guess I was wrong.

The second story deals with publishing my blog yesterday. It took about ten attempts to get it published. Spark kept telling me to quit using profanity. Huh? I’m no saint; however I saw no profanity in my blog. I read and re read and tried to post. No luck. Then it I saw it. I removed a word. I was allowed to publish. I had an omelet for breakfast that had mushrooms in it. Specifically they were Sh@#ake mushrooms. Spark took exception with Sh@#ake. I had to laugh. That was a new one on me.

Be safe today my dear friends and enjoy your life. It’s the only on you have. I’m going to go stand in the backyard and let the wind blow in my face for a bit.

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Lessons Learned, Year 2 Day 1

Monday, December 20, 2010

It makes you draw a really deep breath when you look at your weight ticker and it reads “zero.” In actuality it screams it at you. Suddenly you are just a bit more aware of what goes into your mouth, a bit more aware say then you were yesterday when all you had to do was convince yourself that the cookie or candy bar or fully loaded pizza wouldn’t hurt you “that much.” After all you are a success. Your weight ticker proves it. People visit your Spark page and tell you what an inspiration you are. Go ahead, eat the peanut cluster. It won’t hurt you. You’re a success.

You are starting all over, ground zero with nothing to hang your hat on but a lot of experience. You notice throughout the day how many bad habits have wormed their way back into your behavior. You expected a few but not as many as you found. It shocks you a bit. You didn’t get lax you got lazy!!! You pick up The Spark and make sure you remember where the measuring cups and spoons are and oh my goodness you get fewer calories than you did yesterday!

You have a house full of people eating stuff you adore. You make an egg white omlet with mushrooms, tomatoes and onions. You eat a bagel thin. You are amazed to recall that butter does indeed have calories and yes John, you have to track them. At noon when the gym opens you excuse yourself from these wonderful and adorable folks and you brave a bitter wind to sweat like its August.

More than once today you ask yourself if this was a good idea or not. It means you have to take some risks, you have to accountable and you have to reach a whole new set of goals. But you also know you can do it because you did it once before. You reached a summit and you looked out over the world around you and you smiled because it felt so good.

Last year I came to understand I was worth so much, I deserved to be healthy and happy and I latched on to roughly a million new friends who confirmed I was who I hung around with.

I know what I can do because I know what I have done

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Hitting The Reset Button

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Since my anniversary blog a few days ago I have remained silent. I think it’s good to pull back from time to time and reassess your goals, your progress, what works and what needs to be improved. I had a great first year here. My fitness level is through the roof compared to last year and I am a small child lighter. I’m really pleased. I basked in that glory for about an hour and then came to some decisions.

If you check out my Spark Page you’ll notice my ticker says “zero.” That’s because I reset my weight goals. I’m not going to give myself a chance to fall back on past performance. When I weighed this morning I reset all my goals. They are ambitious. But I have to tell you, as I sat and adjusted them I got this really cool feeling in the pit of my stomach. I got excited. You see, I know what I can do, because I know what I have done. My original weight goal was to lose 100 pounds. I got 64% of the way there. It would be easy to just shoot for another 36 pounds and leave it there. The problem is I’d still be overweight. My weight goal is set one pound below “overweight.”

Why am I excited? I know more than I did a year ago. I’m not saying this is going to be easy, but I know what to expect and plan for it. I have been down this road once and have been successful.

We had our family Christmas yesterday. The kids will be with spouses families and the like next Saturday so we had everyone over and did the gift exchange. Of course there was food!!! But I have to tell you I navigated that mine field really well. No sweets, no alcohol of any sort, no snack stuff. I did have some diet Mountain Dew. I had some ham, some turkey, a few boneless Buffalo wings and some fresh veggies. Actually I did most of the prep work while Joan did the cooking and I was way too busy to eat. The temptation was there but I have come to learn that I am way too valuable to trade in my self-esteem for a cookie.

It’s a new day, a new beginning and so if you don’t mind I’m going to toddle off and just enjoy the nice feeling of excitement I have in my stomach. Pretty soon, there will be less of me to love.

I know what I can do, because I know what I have done.

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My First (Of Many) Year At Spark. A One Year Blog

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

“When I began my business ten years ago I searched for a motto or tag line that would describe what I did. I came up with "Helping Good People Become Better." It dawned on me this morning as I filled in my data here at Spark People that I had been really successful at doing that for everyone but myself. While I took the time to encourage, nurture and develop other people I let myself and my goals fall by the wayside. Something or someone else was always more important. I helped a lot of good people become better at my own expense.
It's hard to be appropriately selfish, to take the time for you. I'm going to start. Starting today, I am going to look at myself through the same prism I look at other people through. I'm a good person on the road to becoming better.”

That was my first blog here at Spark, one year ago today. It’s my first year Spark-Aversary. I reached my goal. I am wiser, healthier and happier that I was one year ago today. I weigh sixty five pounds less than I did a year ago. I’ve accumulated over sixteen thousand fitness minutes and along the way made over six hundred new friends. I reached my goal of helping a really good person --- me---- become a better one.

Okay, yesterday is history, over and done with.

I am not unhappy with my progress but I fell thirty five pound short of my initial goal. I’m not going to jump off a bridge or anything but I noticed recently that when I had a setback I would take solace in all the weight I had lost and sort of say “its okay, John.” That has become a roadblock.

Sunday, when I weigh in I am resetting my weight ticker. It will reflect my new goal for the next year which will be a bit more than thirty five pounds. I’ll start all over again just like I did a year ago. It’s time I did that, I need the motivation. A year ago this whole thing scared me. This morning, starting over does the same thing, but in a much different way. Today I KNOW what I am capable of doing. The part that made me chuckle is when I thought about all the people who will visit my page and say; “Gee he really hast done anything, has he?” That’s my ego messing with me.

There are those of you who love me and I want you to know I love you also. It’s not the greeting card store kind of love it is a true, deep abiding love that people have for each other when they have been able to share parts of themselves with each other and come away feeling better than they were before. That has meant more to me than any 5K or weight loss. It has been the highlight of my year.


I only have one regret. There are so many times I don’t respond to all the Spark Mails, Goodies and Blog Comments you all leave for me. I’m not making excuses but I often run out of time and in her wisdom my dearest wife says “You are not spending the rest of your life in front of the computer!!!” I’m going to work on a way to get back to all of you.


Sunday afternoon, with not a lot to do, I went scanning my Spark friends, putting my cursor over their picture and I noticed so many are not currently active. I wish I could talk to them and ask them why. I get so caught up in my little group of buddies that I forget a year ago, on day one, a handful of people commented on my first blog and I remember thinking “Wow, someone knows I’m out here.”

Thanks you for being my friend.

Much Love
John

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"If I'm So Lucky..........." or What Really Matters Part 2

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

I haven’t been able to run for a week which in some respects seems like forever. I injured my leg, specifically my left knee, last Monday when I stepped wrong while running on the track. This is a really polite way of saying I run somewhat awkwardly at times. The doctor prescribed rest. Friday he told me I could walk and yesterday told me to simply listen to my body. I spent time on the dread mill, the elliptical and had a personal training session where all we worked on was upper body strength. All the time we were training I kept an eye on the folks running. I felt left out. I felt like the kid with the used bike in a room full of kids with brand new bikes. It could be a few weeks before I can begin running and the ortho guy suggested I begin slowly running a mile three times a week and building back up. If someone tells me how “lucky” I was not to be hurt more seriously one more time, I’m going to spit!!

The point of this blog is not to vent, rant or illicit support. It’s not a “count your blessings.” (Even though I do!!) It’s to tell you that it’s no big deal, really in the grand scheme of life. It is disappointing but the world hasn’t ended yet. I am feeling inadequate and that feeling comes solely through my own choosing. I am choosing to feel less than all those folks motoring around the track so it gives me some sort of justification to feel sorry for myself. When I feel sorry for myself I now have the opportunity to pull out my address book dial 1-800-EMOTIONAL-EATER and say “Come on over!!!” My feelings don’t originate in my injury; they originate in my perception of myself.

Watch a professional athlete on the sidelines when they are out for the season. No one hovers around them with a box of Kleenex. Injuries are part of life and life, as you and I know, refuses to be predictable in any form or fashion. Injuries are like riding over a nail and blowing out a tire. You hadn’t planned for it, it isn’t expected and you sit by the side of the road waiting for a wrecker. All of that comes from how you really feel about yourself. If I view this as a setback, a bit of a flat tire, then in a few weeks we will start anew. If I don’t it gives me reason to feel sorry for myself and cut a few corners. No one would blame me. I love to run, it’s enjoyable but so is going to Disneyland. I’m not going to have a pity party because I can’t catch a flight to LA tomorrow.

Our minds are amazing tools but in the end there is no getting around the fact they do what we tell them to do. I took a simple injury and turned it into a whole self-esteem issue because once again I was different that anyone else. If I’m not careful it could derail me.

Most of us grew up hearing about the three little pigs. Two built their houses from straw and sticks. The third built his house from brick. I suspect it took longer and cost more, but when the Big Bad Wolf aka known as life’s miseries came a callin’ the brick house stood firm. The other two collapsed and crumbled and never were heard from again.

Learning to be healthy isn’t just about what goes in my mouth. In many ways that’s just a symptom. The disease is how I see and value myself. It’s easy to blame the past and people in it, but when I look to the left and right all I see is that I am surrounded by a lot of love and support. What’s my excuse now?

Off to the dreadmill.

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