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Week Four Challenge: My Anthem

Tuesday, September 21, 2010


"People, people who need people, are the luckiest people in the world."

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TEACHING1ST 9/22/2010 6:54PM

    I'm so proud of your 5K run and happy to be one of your Spark Friends (but not a runner!!) Good luck. "No man is an island...no man stands alone..."

Mary

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HAPPY_ONE 9/22/2010 12:01AM

    First time of me seeing your vlog and you are amazing. I totally agree with you. We learn and gain strength from the people around us and you have definately learned something from you sir.
Best of luck on your run, you will do amazing.
I wish you Happiness

_/|\_

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MSCOCOPUFFS01 9/21/2010 3:42PM

    GREAT vlog!! I am in total agreement!

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DEE_DEE1972 9/21/2010 1:36PM

    John, I did not know this song and I just looked it up (thanks, youtube!)... Thank you, is all I can say.

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JBABY27 9/21/2010 11:57AM

    this gave me chills. keep it up!

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IMOJANE 9/21/2010 11:56AM

    What a wonderful, considerate vlog. I think it's amazing that you bring the list of names with you. I feel very lucky for finding this site and finding all these people who motivate me to be better and challenge myself and to love myself. And as you say, you run and you do those things for other people, not just for yourself.
Beautiful mind, beautiful words.
Thanks for that

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DIASTER 9/21/2010 11:52AM

  We are all so lucky!. Thanks for the reminder.

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ISHIIGIRL 9/21/2010 11:51AM

    Love this anthem! You will do great at your 5K! and I am lucky you are one of my people! on a side note, you should always wear green!!! Brings out your beautiful eyes! Have a great day!!

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DEVORA4 9/21/2010 10:59AM

  I agree with Barbara Streisand and you,

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DOLLBABE56 9/21/2010 10:59AM

    Awwwwwe, that is so nice! I need you too! I need all of my Spark Friends!

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It's Okay to Be Scared......... Just Deal With It!!! : Four Days and Counting

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

I was stretching on the living room floor this morning, getting ready to take my morning walk, when sudden;y there was this very cold feeling in the pit of my stomach. I believe in popular parlance it's called "fear." Conventional wisdom tells us that the very moment someone tells us they are scared we are to quickly respond with "Oh, there is no need to be scared. You will do just fine." See, if you let me be scared then there is the possibility that you could be scared and then you'd have to acknowledge it. Best to pooh-pooh our fears.

I run my first 5K Saturday. I am prepared physically, I am preparing mentally. I found out this morning I am not well prepared emotionally. I was scared.

I got fat by not facing my fears. I stuffed them, hid them, denied them, made light of them. I ate them away.

On May 8, 2010 Joan and I walked in a 5K. Overcome by middle aged foolishness or caught up in the crowd I ran the last one eight mile or so. I felt good. The next morning I walked three miles and the following Monday I downloaded the pod casts for the C25K training program. I began to run. I was comfortable running because I couldn't ever envision me running any farther than fifteen feet and by the way; that 5K might as well have been ten years away. It didn't register on the radar. This Saturday, four short days away, I run the 5K. Somewhere in that mix I went from running to being a runner.

I laid on the living room floor, scared. I got up and started my walk and decided to figure out what I was scared of before the walk was over. It didn't take long. I was scared of success. Once i complete this first 5K I have to set another goal, and then another one and suddenly in territory I never dreamed of being in. It's scary. I can stand up in front of five hundred people and talk for an hour and shake it off as fun. I can run around the neighborhood and listen to my I pod with no fear. Saturday morning I am going to run with a whole bunch of other people with a whole bunch more people watching. I am not scared of tripping and falling, that might be a blessing. I was scared of doing it well and forcing myself into a new comfort zone.

I realized too, that this weight plateau I reached had nothing at all to do with my body adjusting. It had to do with my mind and soul being petrified of having to live in the light. It has to do with John wanting to Talk the talk but not always walk the walk.

It's okay to be scared as long as you deal with it and deal with it as soon as possible. I ended my walk with a grin. I learned something new about me.

Now I am ready emotionally. I'm going to run Saturday because right now, it's what I know how to do.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DEREKCSIMMONS 9/22/2010 2:29PM

    Amen brother. I don't know how many times I've told my scouts "bravery has nothing to do with not being scared and everything to do with how you face it." Easy words to say and hard words to swallow sometimes. I've recently had the greiving conversation that bugmama42 references. Uncomfortable but with the effort none the less.

Have a great race and I look forward to hearing about your next goal!

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HLPRATT 9/22/2010 12:33PM

    Great blog. I don't think many people acknowledge a fear of success

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BUGMAMA42 9/21/2010 11:25PM

    One of my "light bulb" moments early on in my journey came from a seemingly innocent question asked by someone on the sidelines of my life: "Do you ever grieve the old you?" Talk about Pandora's box! It made me think a LOT about just the sort of stuff you've blogged. Very success-related stuff. And yup, anything uncomfortable in my old life, the old me would have stuffed away with food to make me comatose and less vulnerable to the rawness of life. You can do this. Don't worry about the next goal. Enjoy reaching THIS one! This is a journey worth experiencing COMPLETELY!!!

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MORTICIAADDAMS 9/21/2010 10:13PM

    You better be ready, John. I don't want to have to come and drag you out of the house kicking and screaming. LOL.

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CJWORDPLAY 9/21/2010 10:01PM

    Wow! Did I need to hear this today. You spoke right to what I've been feeling.
Sounds silly when I write it down - but ---- I've realized this program works for me.
I really could succeed. Oh, my! Then what will I do? I'm seeing serious change - big unknowns coming up and - that old primitive part of my brain has been shouting, "Whoa!"

Thanks for writing about this. I'm encouraged by how you recognized and processed your fear and found your own way to cope. I know I'll get through it too.

CJ emoticon

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WEIGHTOSUCCESS 9/21/2010 7:10PM

    I'm running a 5k Saturday as well and i'm mentally psyching myself out. I've done several races before so I know what to expect but this one somehow seems different. This will be my first race since my back surgery in May and I feel SCARED to death. I know you'll do great. This is what you've been training for.. and it all comes down to this... YOU ARE prepared, and emoticon

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LADYROSE 9/21/2010 5:59PM

    "I realized too, that this weight plateau I reached had nothing at all to do with my body adjusting. It had to do with my mind and soul being petrified of having to live in the light."

A-freakin-MEN!! So many times I've been stopped from doing something because I'm gripped by fear... what am I afraid of? Most times it's nothing more than _having an experience_ That's it.

And, through out all the 60+ pounds of learning I've gone through, fear does more than stop us from having exeriences - the body takes it as a "stop the presses" moment. It literally holds on to everything - brain says, "we're tense, we must be getting ready to run for our lives, better hold on to everything we've got."

We relax, brain says, "what's all this stuff? we don't need it... release the fat!"

ok, not quite so fun as that, but you get the idea.

Rock the 5K and embrace the fear and the experience at the same time!!!

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KSGROTHE 9/21/2010 5:19PM

    emoticon for being so honest in sharing with us about your fear!

I, too, fear success, so much so that many times I don't do what I need to do. I procrastinate. Thank you for saying that it's OK to be scared.

Good luck on your race! I'm sure you'll do great! emoticon

- Karen

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WAUSUP 9/21/2010 4:34PM

    Use that fear in a positive way. Fear can either stop us or motivate and energize us. Stick with the motivation and energy. You're going to do great.

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EDWINA172 9/21/2010 3:33PM

    I was scared when I ran my first race. I am scared with every race. I believe that if I do something enough, eventually I won't be scared anymore. I'm scared of my goals, but that is a good thing. We need to travel outside of our comfort zones. We can't become who we need by staying who we are.

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CATHERINEL66 9/21/2010 1:50PM

    Oh, no, you'll have to set another goal!! I am laughing about this. THERE's the real reason! Next thing you know, you'll be running the Freeway to Something Really Huge program!

I hear you on stuffing feelings .... apparently I stuffed 40 lbs of stress and drama. I'm happy to be unloaded of most of it, and happy you're not stuffing anymore either!

Let's hear it for non-stuffers! Whoo hoo!


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ELYMWX 9/21/2010 12:15PM

    Just remember; everyone else running with you is facing or has faced their own similar fears, and you are not alone. Enjoy the run.

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ISHIIGIRL 9/21/2010 11:55AM

    It is normal to be a little nervous and anxious whenever we try something for the first time. It is ok to be afraid of succeeding. Just acknowledging your fear has given you victory over it. Only you can determine what the next step after the 5K will be, so don't let that fear paralyze you. Keep on keeping on! and don't psych yourself out.

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MOTIVATIONFOUND 9/21/2010 11:06AM

    Excellent blog. I can totally relate to the fear. Awesome job pushing through it. You're going to do great this weekend. Good luck! Can't wait to hear about it.

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DOLLBABE56 9/21/2010 10:53AM

    Well shoot John, I'd be scared too! And I completely know where you are coming from. But, you have knowledge of the course, and the ability to run it. (which I will say again, was very smart of you to drive it before you came home)

Question: Will you use you ipod when you run the race? or go with the excitement of the race? I would probably be tempted to use my ipod, just to help me focus, but that is where I am in the training right now. I depend on it.

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STORMTMB 9/21/2010 10:47AM

    You have faced many fears already and found SUCCESS!!! You will do it again Saturday, despite the knot in your stomach.

Re-read your title... stick wtih being sacred! God is with you, today and every day including through your 5K. Freudian slip? Hmmm.

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SMOCKON 9/21/2010 10:36AM

    You may have to set another goal after running this 5K, but it doesn't have to be a 10K or an ironman competition. You don't have to outdo yourself with each new goal. You just need to have a new goal, not a bigger one. I look forward to seeing a photo of you after you cross the finish line!

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DEWBERRYJAMIE 9/21/2010 10:30AM

    Awesome post John!!! You go run on Saturday, and run with your chin high, and run proud!!

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BJW-FARMGIRL 9/21/2010 10:27AM

    You go, John!

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ANDARIEL 9/21/2010 10:15AM

    I've been struggling with the whole fear thing myself this week. How odd that something as good as success could be so terrifying at times. It's nice to know I'm not alone in my worries, or in the desire to overcome them.

Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end!

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My First 5K: Five Days and Counting

Monday, September 20, 2010

I guess I should be grateful that i have enough activity in my life to keep me from getting bored. The wedding is now officially in the books and I woke up this morning realizing it is only five days until I run in my first official 5K.

I ran two miles this morning in the midst of downtown Louisville. I have a real appreciation for the small city I live in. The stop lights in Louisville take forever to change and I was forced to jog in place waiting. Truth be told I probably ran five miles if you count all the jogging in place.

I discovered that running every third day is something that works well for me and my body. It seems to respond better and there is no soreness or discomfort. I will run Thursday and then take Friday off. The run is early Saturday morning.

I was really hoping to get a chance to run the course Saturday, but there was just so much to do that we never were able to get to the park. I was able to drive it yesterday and there are two pretty big hills. most of my running to date has been at a continual incline but when I saw these two hills my eyes sort of went wide. My plan is to tackle them slowly and steadily and I'll eventually get up them.

My mood right now is a bit anxious. It's not a bad anxious, just an expectation of what's to come. You only do something for the first time once so I want to savor this.

I really appreciate the advice and support everyone here has given me. Have a great day and I will update you tomorrow.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUEB54 9/21/2010 1:34PM

    You should be real proud of yourself and how far you've come. You are going to do great and once it's over you'll be looking for your next! :) emoticon

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STORMTMB 9/21/2010 8:16AM

    You have a neat, obtainable goal ahead of you and you will achieve it; we will celebrate with you!

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ZURDTA- 9/21/2010 2:44AM

    Godo luck with it - you will do it fine, you have planned and trained well.

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MORTICIAADDAMS 9/20/2010 8:55PM

    Get out there and kick butt, John. emoticon

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DOLLBABE56 9/20/2010 6:11PM

    That was a great idea to drive the course. Now you know the layout of the race and can run it without any surprises. Don't let the hills worry you. You can do this. I know you can. Don't "sweat" it. lol I am so proud of you and I'll be here rooting for you as will all of your Spark Friends!

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DELPHYNE 9/20/2010 5:57PM

    We have our first 5Ks on the same day! Good luck to you! I will think of you while I'm out on my course - hoping you are having a wonderful race!

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MCSNYDER1 9/20/2010 5:44PM

    Way to go! I'm too chicken to sign up for my first 5K! I "run" a lot of hills and have found that if I shorten my stride on them, they don't seem so hard. Good luck!

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HDHAWK 9/20/2010 5:37PM

    John, I know you'll do great!

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GETFIT2LIVE 9/20/2010 5:07PM

    Don't let those hills intimidate you, John, you can handle them. When you face them, just keep chanting (silently, of course) hills are fun, hills are fun. If you have to slow w-a-y down to make it up them, do it. The big thing is to go out there and enjoy every moment of the experience. Looking forward to getting the race report when you're done, make sure Joan takes plenty of pictures if she's not running with you!

emoticon

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BEANPOD77 9/20/2010 5:00PM

    You will do great John! I just completed my first official 5K this past Sunday..so we almost ran together emoticon
It's very much a mental thing, so you are right to take those hills a step at a time..remember this is about you and for you so you set your pace..and before you know it, you will experience the thrill of accomplishment! I wish you luck and be sure to let us know ( and see?) how it went!

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CATHERINEL66 9/20/2010 4:58PM

    Excellent! You're going to do this and it will be great! I'm really proud of you! I remember when you started the C25K program, so this is really cool.

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KSGROTHE 9/20/2010 4:50PM

    Good luck on your 5K this weekend! You'll do emoticon

- Karen

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SMOCKON 9/20/2010 4:37PM

    I'm excited for you. I know it's going to be a great experience.


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ISHIIGIRL 9/20/2010 4:32PM

    Good luck, John! I know you can do it!

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We Are Home

Monday, September 20, 2010

The wedding was wonderful. I have never been involved in something that came off with so few glitches. Actually, I canít think of a major one. Lots of minor things, but no drama. Now that itís over there is this bit of an emotional letdown. We were all so busy for the past month or so getting ready. All five of Paulís brothers and sisters were in the wedding party, so there was a lot of activity surrounding the ďgetting ready part.Ē

We had a great time and as usual it was good to see everyone. I did pretty well when it came to watching my caloric intake. I am not going to lie, I ate wedding cake and there were a few cookies that passed my lips over the weekend but for the most part I ate sensibly. I had a glass of champagne at the reception when we toasted the bride and groom. Otherwise I drank ice water or un sweet iced tea.

I was able to run in downtown Louisville Thursday morning and this morning. I logged a little time on the elliptical in the hotel Friday and Saturday. What I am the proudest of was that I didnít use the stress of the wedding as an excuse to binge.

So itís back to normal, ordinary life. Much thanks to all of you who wished Joan and I well. We really appreciate it. I am going to vegetate until tomorrow, here in a few so have a Spark filled day.


  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

STORMTMB 9/21/2010 10:43AM

    So glad that everything went well. Lots of happy memories for the bride and groom as well as for your entire family. Happy events are the best!!!

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WISEONE68 9/21/2010 10:11AM

    So happy for you all that everything went well. The picture is beautiful and I certain you are proud!!

You deserve a little "vegetate" time. Enjoy!!

Glad you took time to enjoy your family, the food fair (though in moderation) and the location (running in Louisville)...take time to recovery and recoup...and prepare for the next major event (Thanksgiving, Christmas, another wedding??!!)!! emoticon

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DOLLBABE56 9/21/2010 9:59AM

    I'm proud of you John.

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ZURDTA- 9/21/2010 2:43AM

    Just wonderful - way to go! And huge congrats to the bride and grrom, a beautiful couple with such a bright future.

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ANNE-ELIZ 9/21/2010 12:28AM

    I'm glad it went so well! It seems like a wonderful event for your whole family.

Congratulations on your success; not only in your choices about food but in having a good time!

There is no reason to do any of this if it doesn't contribute to joy in our lives and those of others!

I'm sure that you will be tired, if only due to the letdown after the high of such an event, but that will pass more quickly due to the choices you made.

Comment edited on: 9/21/2010 12:30:31 AM

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TINKERBELL200 9/20/2010 9:57PM

    Love the pic! Glad you all had a blessed day! You did great! I'm proud of you for not stress eating and keeping up with your exercise! Good job, John!

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MORTICIAADDAMS 9/20/2010 8:54PM

    Good looking couple!!

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DUTCHIEKIWI 9/20/2010 7:47PM

    So glad all went well. and what a beautiful pic!!! awesome stuff!!!

Dutchie

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CARTOONB 9/20/2010 7:28PM

    Great job on not binging and for no drama. Enjoy the vegetation!!!

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KSGROTHE 9/20/2010 4:49PM

    emoticon for not binging at such a happy but stressful time! It sounds like you did a great job managing your eating!

It's emoticon that you got a little exercise in, too!

Keep up the good work! emoticon

- Karen

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BTINTERNET 9/20/2010 4:24PM

    Glad it went so well and welcome home!

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GETFIT2LIVE 9/20/2010 4:19PM

    Congratulations to all concerned! There is nothing wrong with having a piece of wedding cake and a few cookies; part of life is celebrating major events, and celebrations often include special foods and meals. The important thing is to not use those as an excuse to eat everything in sight and have two or three or more slices of cake while we're at it. Enjoy your 'vegetate' time!

emoticon

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ISHIIGIRL 9/20/2010 4:16PM

    Glad you had a good time and stayed the course. Weddings can be so stressful. Have a great day.

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And Their Off............ The wedding day has bega

Saturday, September 18, 2010

2

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JPRICE217 9/19/2010 7:22PM

    the wedding is over hope everything went well

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VTORIA3 9/19/2010 7:22AM

    I'll bet the wedding was lovely. All your weight loss, looking and feeling your best, probably made it all the sweeter! Enjoy your post wedding day with the family.

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CHERIRIDDELL 9/18/2010 11:19PM

    I hope the wedding was great fun!

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DAARJ53 9/18/2010 9:44PM

    Congratulations on the wedding, thank you so much for sharing with us on your special day. I have been reading through some of your blogs and I just want to say that you are definitely a special person, so inspirational. You have truly motivated me, as I am one of those people that seemed to have lost the Spark, got back on track this week and had a great loss. Thank you and enjoy your special day.

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WISEONE68 9/18/2010 4:29PM

    I pray all goes/went well at the wedding...what a joyous event! Will love seeing photos!!

Bless you all!

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MSCOCOPUFFS01 9/18/2010 2:44PM

    A precious moment.. lol how cute! Enjoy the wedding!

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DOLLBABE56 9/18/2010 1:42PM

    Well, bless you. You are going to have a great day. How special for you getting to spend quality workout time with your future daughter-in-law.

You must have thought, "hmmm.... water on the floor. Could be worse..... This is not going to ruin the day!" And it hasn't.

Yes, this will be a great day! emoticon

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BRENDABUNNY 9/18/2010 1:22PM

    have a great day you and Joan both deserve it...seems theres been alot of time and love and effort into planning this wedding all along so I wish you and Joan and the Son and the bride to be a wonderful blessed day!Have a blast! emoticon

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HONORINGGOD 9/18/2010 12:51PM

    enjoy this day thanks for the stop by to share

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SAPPHIRE983 9/18/2010 12:05PM

    Have a good time at the wedding! I hope you have a great Saturday too!

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