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The Things We Think Sometimes.......

Thursday, July 01, 2010

I hadnít been to a lunch meeting of the Optimists for over a month. Work kept me out of town. I was looking forward to seeing a lot of folks I had missed in that time. Everyone that greeted me congratulated me on my weight loss and the article they ran on me in our local paper about healthy life styles.

When I sat down to eat three or four people came over, sat down, looked at me earnestly, and said. ďYouíre cursed, you know that donít you?Ē

Yes I did. You see the last three people my gym featured in their articles not only gained all the weight they lost back they added about fifty percent. This is a small city and everyone knows everyone so people notice and BTW: People are cruel. Iím not going to detail some of their remarks but suffice to say I got scared.

See I am within twenty five pounds of my initial goal weight. I been batting around the same five pounds for a month and even though intellectually I know whatís going on I am still getting scared. Iím scared all the weight is hiding in my bedroom closet again and itís going to come creeping back on to me and Iíll be a Spark failure. Then no one will love me and BTW did I tell you Iíd be a failure?

I am really not sure what can make you more miserable, being fat or being thin? So I did some stuff that I know none of you have ever done, like eating below your calorie levels and amping up your cardio to burn a bit more. Anyone here ever get worried about eating and start cutting some really weird corners because you are scared that an extra bite of whole grain bread is going to add fifteen pounds to you? You may not have done it but a dollar to donuts you thought about it.

As a once famous bald headed female exercise leader said ďStop the Insanity.Ē

Suffice to say I was a basket case. It was like running a 5K in quicksand (Wonder if they have a podcast for that?) The harder I tried the more bogged down and anxious I got.

I went to a friendís Spark Page to thank them for something and I actually stopped for a minute and read it. (LOL) They had been someone I had admired for some time and have been successful in fighting the good fight. But I had never read what ďthey stood for.Ē Maybe it was because I had all kinds of time on my hands yesterday or maybe my guardian angel sent me there but as I scrolled down the page I saw this line:

ďEat to fuel my body and my life, not just be below my calorie range.Ē

ďOh wow!!! Someone actually had the same thoughts I did!!!Ē Weird as it may seem, I felt better and I had a lesson reinforced at the same time. Somewhere in the Bible it says ďNothing is new under the sun.Ē That one line made me feel like I wasnít alone. I smiled a bit and actually had a bit of a tear well up in my eye.

ďIím normal,Ē I whispered.

We think and do crazy things sometimes. Our fears get the best of us and once they latch on to us they are like a pit bull, they donít let go. Our fears are what drive us into doing silly stuff that only hurts us in the long run.

You guys may get really bored in hearing all this but I really believe three things create a good foundation for our success.

You are worth more than you can ever imagine.

You deserve only the best and should not only expect it but in most cases demand it.

You really are who you hang around with.

There are so many of you who have motivated and inspired me in so many ways and just like yesterday I am so grateful for it. I choose to hang around with really great folks and if you are reading this, you are one of them.

Time for breakfast.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PSSN4FITNESS 7/7/2010 6:58PM

    I remember being that crazy person a couple months ago! Man, that plateau had me bugging! But, it is so great when you get your perspective back. That allows you to keep pressing forward and get balance in your life. Great Post and great words of wisdom!

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MARCYNA 7/4/2010 2:33PM

    I'm a bit scared of people whose silly remarks made you feel like that, are you sure you want to see them again???You just don't need those stupid people's remarks, you only need to be around w/people who love you and see the best in you - sorry I know it's a bit blunt but I need to repeat this to myself first emoticon

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ROSE5328 7/2/2010 8:23AM

    Thanks for reminding me that I'm normal!

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KATIEGLEN012 7/2/2010 7:22AM

    John...fear is the enemy. We are who we hang out with...and you, my friend, are about to reverse the curse! Thank heaven! Look forward with joy and thank God for the health you can see.

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PINETREEGIRL 7/2/2010 1:42AM

    Fuel yourself--fuel your body, fuel your dreams.
I relate to this blog well, because I chose SP as a way of trying to lose weight without deprivation. With deprivation, I am champion--I can make myself stop eating for months at a time. That tactic might not work as well since I stopped smoking, but...I was very good at it.
But being thin and being healthy, instead of being thin or healthy, is a new horizon. It's 10,000 times more challenging. And it will last longer.

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CARTOONB 7/1/2010 10:11PM

    Yep! So, because you and I think alike (or have some of the same thoughts at least) that makes you normal?! I guess I'm normal too! LOL!!

I get the fear thing! The weight is lurking out there and it's going to jump back on as soon as I close my eyes! I don't know where mine is hiding tho...if it was the closet, I'd lock the door!

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HONORINGGOD 7/1/2010 9:50PM

    we are not norman we are sons of the most high ,joint heirs with JESUS CHRIST .his promises goon for ever . im proud of you &your worth it . a wise man told me that emoticonyou. GOD BLESS YOU MY FRIEND emoticon

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SLY_REDUX 7/1/2010 8:58PM

    Bless you, I'm NOT normal - but I've learned to make it work for me! emoticon

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GEEMAWEST 7/1/2010 8:16PM

    Thanks, John.

For your information, I never get tired of you telling me that I am worth more than I can ever imagine. I like hearing it and don't mind saying that sometimes I "need" to hear it because I am so hard on myself.

And BTW, you too are worth more than you can ever imagine.

Love, Cheryl

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JUST_TRI_IT 7/1/2010 8:02PM

    Hmmm. They are optimists? I am not sure I'd belong to a group that seems to want to bring people down! Even if someone has a thought like that, why share it at all? Your town sounds like a town I work in... Lots of cruel people :(

Yes, we are in this together... and all those "unique" thoughts we have seem to land on familiar ears, don't' they! And we do feel a camaraderie when we voice our successes or scary thoughts and someone seems to connect. Rather nice!!

You will make it, John. You've learned too much to throw thinking out the window!

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STORMTMB 7/1/2010 7:55PM

    BTW - those people don't sound much like optimists! more like pessimists!!!

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STORMTMB 7/1/2010 7:54PM

    I'm pretty sure that I (and many others) told you 50 lbs ago that I'd love you regardless of the number on your scale. Pretty sure that your wife and kids love you too.

For whatever it's worth, my advice is to step away from the scale. If the number (those 5 lbs) is messing with your head, then walk away. Do the things you know are right and quit worrying about it. Let go and let God... go back to that voice that gives you such great advice.

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KLEONIKI 7/1/2010 5:11PM

    My dear John!
We are all in the very same boat sailing in the very same waters...
Similar fears, thinking patterns,and feeling traps.
But also, we are part of the same struggling gang, fighting with similar dragons and our common place is our dream to become HEALTHY.
It is not only a weight matter it is all about doing THE RIGHT THING ,
change inside out FOR LIFE,
and especially do that TOGETHER..
Relax and enjoy the ride it is not a change for who witness it only
for who experience it..
Keep on going with this radiant smile of yours

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JURI62 7/1/2010 4:37PM

    Small towns! Aren't they GRAND! Be careful what you focus on, our thoughts have a way of coming true!!! POsitive thinking promotes positive outcomes.
Thanks for another great blog.
Hugs and blessings, Judy

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ANNE-ELIZ 7/1/2010 4:08PM

    It is true that words have great power and you certainly experienced that power in both directions; the negative, posited by those "Optimists" and the positive, by the writer of the blog you mentioned as well as others here on the site.

Those words can engender fear or can give hope. They can be placebo or poison.

But those words need to be processed and evaluated by a human mind; your mind, which works very well! OK, you wrestled with the fear demon but emerged victorious, with a little help from your friends!

emoticon emoticon

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    I'm going to have to slip you some ego boosting pills, John. LOL. When I hear people talk about gaining all the weight back and more I feel sorry for those unfortunate people but I don't relate to them. I don't consider myself in that group. I'm always in the 5-6% that loses what they want and keeps it off and I put you in that group too. Don't allow anyone else to put you in the other group. You don't belong there. You have been put in the group you belong in.

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PENNYAN45 7/1/2010 1:36PM

    If we take our time losing the weight - and make a lifestyle change that we will live with forever - then we will not gain the weight back.

There are many SPers who joined maintenance teams to insure that they did NOT gain the weight back.

Spark could be a part of your life for several more years - while you maintain your weight as well.

Congratulations on your loss so far - and for coming so close to your goal!


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SHEILAKHS1 7/1/2010 1:19PM

    John I love reading your blogs because all in all you make ME feel Normal as i struggle with this lifestyle every day
Thank you for always sharing

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BBGOOGIN 7/1/2010 12:33PM

    Wow, John. I enjoyed your blog today and I'm really glad you were enabled to process that one through. That's the keeping power of God, that you didn't receive those cursed words as your own....

"Now to Him who is able to keep you from stumbling, And to present you faultless before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy...." (Jude 1:24)

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JLUVSHIKIN 7/1/2010 12:16PM

    Thanks for the post. Especially about the part, "I am normal" Sometimes it is hard to feel normal. Good to know that occasionally someone else feels the same way!

Great post. And by the way... you are only cursed if you allow it to be!

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GRANDTO4 7/1/2010 12:11PM

  John, you are so far from "cursed", that comment was just laughable. I felt the same fear you mentioned, when after less than 24 hrs. in the hospital, no food for three days, and I was up in weight TEN pounds! My brain jumped straight to panic (and thoughts of doughnuts), until I talked some sense into myself. It took 2 1/2 weeks post-surgery to lose that ten pounds, but it's gone. Now I understand I need to have patience with my body; it's been through a lot, and is still kickin'. So what if I get where I'm going a few weeks later?? There's no way I can un-learn the tools I have learned on this site, and from great motivators like you!

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    you can and are doing it!

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GETFIT2LIVE 7/1/2010 10:48AM

    You are not at ALL alone in your fears, my friend; you are indeed normal (but extraordinary, too). I have been very successful at losing weight before, but terrible at keeping it off. I've lost 40 pounds now, second best weight loss results to date, and a part of me is terrified that the weight is hiding under the bed, waiting for me to make one little slip and then it will jump back on me again with some extra, then I will be a failure (again) and not be loved . . . it is crazy-making and can lead to under eating, over working our bodies, or worse. Time to start believing in ourselves and keep those foundations for success in front of us; thanks for sharing, it DOES help to know we are not alone.


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FANAMAMA 7/1/2010 10:47AM

    Ummm, didn't you say it was a gathering of OPTIMISTS?!?! They need to change their name!
Or make YOU their C.E.O.!
I think often people gain back the weight they lost because they got on the Express Weight Loss train, closed their eyes and held their breath until the reached their destination. It was simply a means to an end, and once they got there, they didn't really know what to do with themselves so they fell back into their old patterns. (Experience speaking here)
I prefer to think of our Spark journey as the slow but steady Scenic Journey Healthy Living train. We are generally making progress, taking the time to take a good hard look at the world around us and reordering our priorities so that we put being healthy (not skinny) FIRST. We go through valleys, some of them dark and cloudy, but we also go to the tops of the mountains where we can see for miles and dare to whisper, Life is Good!
After all you've already gone through, do you REALLY see yourself ever again sitting on the couch with a bag of chips in one hand and the remote in the other?

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FANAMAMA 7/1/2010 10:47AM

    Ummm, didn't you say it was a gathering of OPTIMISTS?!?! They need to change their name!
Or make YOU their C.E.O.!
I think often people gain back the weight they lost because they got on the Express Weight Loss train, closed their eyes and held their breath until the reached their destination. It was simply a means to an end, and once they got there, they didn't really know what to do with themselves so they fell back into their old patterns. (Experience speaking here)
I prefer to think of our Spark journey as the slow but steady Scenic Journey Healthy Living train. We are generally making progress, taking the time to take a good hard look at the world around us and reordering our priorities so that we put being healthy (not skinny) FIRST. We go through valleys, some of them dark and cloudy, but we also go to the tops of the mountains where we can see for miles and dare to whisper, Life is Good!
After all you've already gone through, do you REALLY see yourself ever again sitting on the couch with a bag of chips in one hand and the remote in the other?

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IMJUSTDUCKIE 7/1/2010 10:25AM

    John, my dear, it's mind over matter :) If you don't 'mind' it, it won't matter :) emoticon

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WALKNLOVE 7/1/2010 10:20AM

    So, I have been sick, more than not the past two weeks, haphazard at best on logging my food in to my nutrition planner, not able to work out much, if at all, and stepped on the scale yesterday to a 6 lb.weight gain! UGH!!! So, you better believe, my 1st thots are going in the wrong direction...what if you fail?
Well, here's a better question for both of us...What if we don't?(Under normal circumstances, I would expand on this, but the truth is I am tired.I need God's strength to get thru.I will let you ponder this question for yourself.Some of our answers will be the same & some will be different, but they will all lead us into clearer thinking!)

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SANDYK4BAMA 7/1/2010 10:16AM

    Oh John - you ARE SO worth it!!! And you are so NOT alone in your craziness. I get scared all the time too. Scared that I will meet my goal, scared that I won't, scared that I'm not losing fast enough, scared that it'll come back, scared-scared-scared.

But you know what? Our preacher taught on this one day in church. The Bible uses the word FEAR 365 times. That's one time for each day of the year, and you know what God says about it: "Fear Not." It's a simple thought really, but boy does the devil really throw that one at us!! After all, he knows all the tricks, and fear, oh boy, fear is one of his meanest and best tricks to keep us from God's blessings.

Keep in mind though, YOU are one of God's blessings too. And if you fall short, don't worry - all your buddies here at SparkWorld will help pick you up, we'll prop you up, and we'll shove you back into action if we have to - just like you'd do for us. None of us is perfect, and even though it seems like we live in a fishbowl sometimes, and EVERYbody is watching and waiting on us to fail, your true friends are not. We are cheering you on, we are on your side. Those other people, well hell, they just DON'T COUNT! Yea! And God is on your side too, he's the best cheerleader of them all. And also, I just bet - you're one of his FAVORITES! You're definitely one of mine! Keep up the good fight, after all, it's for you - not for THEM - whoever they are anyway...

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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ALLISON145 7/1/2010 10:11AM

    I think those amazingly thoughtful people (ahem) who told you that would were doomed to fail actually just did you a favor and pointed out one of the ways that you can be an 'apostle.' It's now your calling to show everyone in your little town that exercising and eating right is NOT an automatic road to failure... that it IS worth it to try to take care of yourself. I think a lot of people never even get started for that very reason - they think they will go to all the trouble to lose the weight and then gain it right back. When (not if) you break your gym's curse and choose to take care of yourself like you would any loved one for the rest of your life, you will inspire others to take that first step.

And remember, even when you don't have faith in yourself, we have faith in you.



P.S. Please try not to worry too much about the scale right now - your body has been through a lot of changes so be kind to yourself and allow some time for adjustment. Just keep doing what you've been doing (nothing crazy) and things will start moving again. Honest!

Comment edited on: 7/1/2010 10:14:44 AM

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JPRICE217 7/1/2010 9:25AM

    John cursed? never! Great blog as always. We can and we will beat the odds

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JERIBERI1 7/1/2010 8:35AM

    John, you definitely AREN'T cursed. Food is fuel for your body and life, just like your friend said. When I first started the SparkJourney, I, too, was obsessed with staying below my calorie range. Then my mind switched over to "healthy living," and what a difference it made!! It's all about being the best YOU you can be, and John, you are doing it!!!

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HDHAWK 7/1/2010 8:13AM

    Can I ever relate to your blog. I was getting compliments all over the place about a year ago, bought all new clothes, and was feeling very confident. Then many things happened in my life and I let those derail my workouts and good eating. I gained most of the weight back and yes, feel like a spark failure. I seem to be the only one who thinks so. I'm way more critical of myself than anyone else is. I'm in the cycle of "almost" being back on plan, but not totally committed. Back and forth with good choices and bad. You are in good company here. I know many of us struggle with the same issue.
I had many comments from people when my weight was down about being too thin, etc. I haven't had any comments from them on gaining some back. That would be rude emoticon. Doesn't seem to be rude to make those comments when we're losing weight. Anyway, we have to do this for us no matter what other people think or say.

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EDWINA172 7/1/2010 8:06AM

    Don't believe in the superstitious poo that your "friends" are telling you. Break the molds. We create our own future. I never get bored with your blogs. I love the fact that you put into print what I am thinking!

You may feel some comfort from one of my favorite quotes...

"Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." A.A.Milne

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BEANPOD77 7/1/2010 8:05AM

    John, I echo MickeyMax's comment..I literally find myself giving a little nod and saying "ya, that's true.." so many times as I read your blogs..Gives me another little boost to carry on..Thanks (yet again!)

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WIGIME 7/1/2010 8:02AM

    Ah, don't you just love small towns?! John, I know you have it in you to be successful and you have come too far to let those last few pounds bluff you.

If it takes another month or 2 to lose them, so what? Life isn't perfect. As long as you have your eye on the prize, you'll get there. Of that I have no doubt!

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CMBELISLE 7/1/2010 7:55AM

    I think in some ways we all fear putting it back on. Hopefully, that will make me more diligent in keeping it off this time. I think it's time someone broke the curse and I'm sure it will be you!

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MICKEYMAX 7/1/2010 7:50AM

    It's a bummer some folks could only focus on the negativity. John, I feel encouraged and uplifted every time I see/read one of your blogs. Keep up the good work. I remind myself every day that I am the one who decides what I do, and how I do it, not popular opinion. Just keep doing the good things for yourself and the rest will follow. You rock! emoticon

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_COSMOPAULATAN_ 7/1/2010 7:40AM

    You aren't cursed unless you choose to be. You have GOT THIS!

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Be Still and Know That I Am God

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

It has always been my favorite quote and it has followed me around all my life. Every time I have hit a rough patch or havenít quite been able to discern something it sits there staring at me.

I had a tooth pulled Monday. Actually it had to be cut out because it had grown into my jaw and needless to say there was pain involved. Most people ask their oral surgeon about post operative care. My questions related to resuming my C25K training, using the elliptical and stationary bike and resuming weight training. Iíll give you the short answer. All I can do is walk until the stitches dissolve which should be by next Monday, hopefully. On the bright side I really didnít need the narcotics they prescribed. By this morning ibuprofen did the trick. But I am digressing here.

All I could do today was sit around. I have a hard time talking. I canít really exercise. Television is, well its television and I wasnít in the mood to read. I began to ask why as in tilting my head upward towards heaven and saying ďWhy?Ē

Be still and know that I am God.

Between me, you and the gate post that really irks me sometimes. I know it is necessary, but it still irks me. Some days I donít want God to be God. I want Him to be what I want Him to be, which is someone who gives me everything I ask for, immediately. The heck with lessons learned and creating foundations and all that rot. Hand it overÖÖÖÖ Now!!!

Be still and know that I am God.

I know why. I just donít like that I know why. God has to slow me down. If He didnít, then only He knows where Iíd be off to with my half baked ideas and plans. He asks me to rest, to relax and mostly He asks me to listen to what He has to say. He gives me all those opportunities to do those things and frankly, most times I pass. I can imagine Him sort of throwing His hands up, rubbing His chine and creating an impact tooth.

He sends me friends with ideas, advice and encouragement and He asks me to take the time to listen. I do, mostly. He asks me to take a deep breath and stand still for a bit so everything can be put into place for me to do my best and be my best.

When I was a kid I hated it when they read the Scripture From the beginning of Matthewsís gospel. It the one with all the ďbegets.Ē Goes from the beginning of time until the birth of Jesus. There are a bunch of names that no one can pronounce and it takes a long time to read. Oh sure there are your heavy hitters in there like Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, David and Solomon. But there were also the people no one really knew. People like Azor and Zadok. You donít hear those names bandied around on Sunday morning
Azor and Zadok and a lot of others were people just like me and you; people who peered off into the fog trying to make sense of it all. Sprinkled in there with the kings and prophets were farmers, carpenters and shepherds; every day folks who struggled and wondered and got bored.

Imagine if it were possible for us to go back in time and tell them that they were a link to salvation. Some car wash dude, scraping gum off a fender wall is in the direct line of salvation history. He probably wouldnít believe you. I know I wouldnít.
I think, like all those folks in Matthews Gospel we arenít supposed to make sense of the whole of creation. We are supposed to have faith, to live good lives and to use every tool God gave us. Sometimes it means letting our engine idle while God directs traffic so we have the best and greatest opportunity to serve Him.

Some days, for me it means that even though I have been a ďgood boy,Ē by doing all my exercise, logging all my food and getting enough rest, the scale needle stays stuck, like some divine hand holds it in place. We are asked and called to believe and I think the most important lesson God gives us to believe in ourselves no matter how small or great the odds. To believe we are worth, we deserve it and we are loved. Some days nothing moves forward because we canít see those amazing things
Itís why we have to sit and nurse a pulled muscle or a broken digit. Itís why the very best thing really always isnít because in the Divine mystery there is something so much better out there for us.

Be still and know that I am God.

So I sit here, trying to make sense of it all. A sore jaw isnít much but I have come to learn that it and things like it can be the beginning of something awesome, wonderful and well, LOL, Divine.

Be still and know that I am God.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KAT573 7/6/2010 11:03AM

    You said it, John:
"I think the most important lesson God gives us to believe in ourselves no matter how small or great the odds. To believe we are worth, we deserve it and we are loved. Some days nothing moves forward because we canÔŅĹt see those amazing things "

and when we stray too far, abominations can happen, like World Wars etc. It is a sobering thought, and being still and listening 'saves' us by keeping us centered in God.
Keep on Keeping ON!

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TINKERBELL200 7/2/2010 10:36PM

    Loved the blog John! Sometimes we do just need to be still and know He is God! I love that scripture! Thank you for sharing. Hope you get to feeling better soon. An impacted tooth can literally be a pain!
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 7/2/2010 10:38:06 PM

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GR8CATSBY 7/2/2010 6:49PM

    Wow - thanks for writing this! What a great reminder that there's a bigger picture. God is weaving a huge tapestry and someday we'll see all of it, but for now we only have a glimpse of a little piece.

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AKATUJE 7/2/2010 2:09AM

    I love this verse!!! It has a way of stopping me in my tracks when i am going round and round trying to understand everything....and also when things get overwhelming!!!

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JAE_HENNINGTON 7/1/2010 6:08PM

  this was my mothers favorite scripture.. I read it to her as she lay dying. such a small scipture but the words are so powerful

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FANAMAMA 6/30/2010 11:45PM

    LOVE this scripture. Say it outloud to myself when I'm running around like a chicken with my head cut off, trying to be everything for everybody. Love it, love the blog, and love you friend!

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CARTOONB 6/30/2010 10:06PM

    Great blog. Something to truly ponder...when God makes me slow down too. Cos I'm not likely to do it on my own! emoticon

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CINDYMCD1 6/30/2010 6:58PM

    Oh my gosh this is my fav too! I walked into a beautiful chuch in Mesa AZ one Sunday and a woman with the voice of an angel sang a song with this title and it was the most beautiful song I believe I had heard. It brought me to my knees and to tears!

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TEACHING1ST 6/30/2010 4:06PM

    I just came across this---I love the quote too and can relate to Matthew's 'long list of begetting!' I'm sorry you have to lay around but take quiet time out and know you'll be up and around soon. Glad you're not in too much pain, either. I was also thinking of the "interview with God" site that someone already mentioned!

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DIASTER 6/30/2010 2:56PM

  Oh John I think I have the perfect message for you, you have been my inspiration forever, saved almost all your posts read them over when the food demons strikes. Please check out it is very special, speeks to the soul and heart, may contain your answer.

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DOLLIE6 6/30/2010 2:43PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticonIt will be better. Be brave.

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RONDAJONES 6/30/2010 1:25PM

    At least God made you rest and "be bored" with a sore eating involved! LOL ;) Praying you get well soon. God actually had you pop into my mind during one of my "prayer sessions" yesterday. Must be something good about to happen! :)

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BECCALYNN75 6/30/2010 1:22PM

    HaHaHa - I so could have written this!
LOL But needed to hear it too!

"Between me, you and the gate post that really irks me sometimes. I know it is necessary, but it still irks me."

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TXNANA_4 6/30/2010 11:07AM

    Thanks for such a wonderful blog today! We all need to remember to "Be Still"!

Hope you mend quickly! emoticon

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MARCYNA 6/30/2010 10:24AM

    As far as I'm concerned I have to trust him being broken-hearted...And - just like you, I always hated the series of names on the Scriptures....Hope your recovery is quick!!!!!. Take your time and know that He's with you.
love emoticon

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MINENA1 6/30/2010 10:21AM

    Thank you for sharing this. Sometimes I forget to "be still" & want to try to fix or hurry everything. Great blog! emoticon

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MORTICIAADDAMS 6/30/2010 10:09AM

    I think too many of us use our faith as an attempt to seize control of our lives not wanting to accept the fact that our destiny is not up to us. You can't control God and sometimes His answer to your requests are a flat no. In the long run He knows what is best and you just have to accept it. Sometimes later on you can appreciate the no when things are revealed and sometimes you never know. At any rate we are told to live by faith and be thankful in all things.

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GERIKRAGH 6/30/2010 9:57AM

    Amen! Thank U. I needed this.

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GETFIT2LIVE 6/30/2010 9:03AM

    Sometimes God whispers and we do stop to listen, other times He has to shout a bit to get our attention (or use an impacted tooth). I have often thought about all those people whose stories we don't get to read in scripture but are listed. In the world's eyes, they are nobodies--no book named after them, no movies made about their lives, nothing to remember they were here except that they are 'in the list' for some reason. Yet God knows their names and made sure they were mentioned, however briefly. He knows your name and mine and has written them on His heart; our job is to make sure His is written on our hearts as well by being still when He calls us to it. Thanks for sharing, John; I am sorry about your tooth, but I'm glad you were able to hear Him speak.


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WALKNLOVE 6/30/2010 8:39AM

    Thanks I needed to hear that today. I too, am having a few days of rest & I don't like it. I find myself turning to comfort food because I am bored and can't exercise.HOW MUCH SENSE DOES THAT MAKE? Nothing like trying to sabotage our own efforts?! Just need to relax and spend a little time chiilin with the Father and listening as He speaks. As always, thanks for sharing! I really enjoy checking in!Often times, you write what seems to be going on in my head.No doubt we'd be good friends b/c we see things so much alike. Blessings to you!

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MSSUNBUG 6/30/2010 8:28AM

    I very much needed to hear this today--thanks for sharing so much hope and truly intelligent insight. I'm impressed (and I promise I'm not easy to impress, LOL).

This is very much the perspective I struggle and strive to take: that even though I've done things "right" and been on my bestest, sometimes things don't look as they "should" for good reason--because I'm being called upon to believe in something greater, to see something bigger, to widen the lens and put my gaze somewhere else. And as a definite HUMAN, sometimes it takes things simply not going my way--or at least the way I think they "should" go in order to get me to do that.

You said this: "I think, like all those folks in Matthews Gospel we arenít supposed to make sense of the whole of creation. We are supposed to have faith, to live good lives and to use every tool God gave us. Sometimes it means letting our engine idle while God directs traffic so we have the best and greatest opportunity to serve Him." Absolutely. Amen.

Thanks again for sharing!

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KPDRMNG 6/30/2010 8:23AM

    Awesome - you have a great writing talent. Love reading your blogs & thank you for sharing!

Hope you heal quickly! emoticon

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The Main Thing........

Monday, June 28, 2010

It took me a few minutes to get it all straight in my head. Iím glad Mass lasts awhile. During the sermon our pastor talked about being on a weeklong youth retreat with one hundred eighth graders. He talked about how they played games and sports and had a lot of fun all day. The evenings he said were reserved for God.
ďThe main thing,Ē he said. ďIs to remember that the main thing is the main thing.Ē Itís really okay if you stop reading and take a few minutes to figure this out. I know it took me a few. Donít worry, this is not going to be a continuation of his sermon, LOL, Iím not that eloquent.

I thought about it and after a bit I thought how it applied to what we are about here at Spark. I can only speak for me, but my purpose in being here is to be healthier tomorrow than I am today. In order to do that I need the support of everyone who is willing to give it to me. Being healthier means I have a lot of choices I can make when it comes to what food goes in my mouth, the exercise I do and the teams and people here I associate with.

Last week while I was out doing my C25K training I jogged past a church that had a sign out front; on the sign was a saying that caught my eye:

ďIt wasnít the apple on the tree that caused the problem; it was the pair beneath the tree.Ē

Choices, LOL, from the beginning of time it has always been about choices. I canít say Iíve always made the best choices in my life. I was morbidly obese at one point in time. I am slowly cycling through obese on my way to simply being overweight. Thatís a choice I made.

I show up here every day on a regular basis and if I do nothing else I chart my food and exercise. At the end of some days I smile and at the end of other days I frown. The main thing is I am here. Itís my choice. I am challenged by many of you to grow in ways I never would have thought about even six months ago. It has opened a whole new world for me.

A healthier me is going to be a me who will be able to do everything he wants to and more importantly everything he is supposed to do. Being worth it and deserving it come with a price. It means that since I know what is expected of me, and how I should live, I have an obligation to pass that on to other people. Some days that can be a difficult choice. Some days I donít feel all ďSparkified.Ē Some days I feel like sitting in a corner and being smug and content. Some weeks if I gain weight I want to be left alone because it is so much easier to ignore the choices I made during the week. Or Maybe I was too tired to hit the gym one day. I donít always want to be reminded of that. Iíd rather sit here and let you think I am the guy who always makes the right choices. I always donít.

The good news is that since I have been here I see the meter trending more and more towards making those right choices on a regular basis. It is easy to forget what the main thing is all about. Itís about you being everything you were meant to be and that comes by choosing wisely.

The main thing has nothing to do with being perfect or being better than anyone else. It means knowing that when you have those glorious days when everything comes together for you that one day you will be able to share that vision with someone who, no matter how hard they are trying, just canít seem to make any progress. It means you will encourage and cajole and maybe sometimes even challenge someone else to be healthy.

ďThe main thing to remember is that main thing is the main thing.Ē If I donít, if I make all the wrong choices for me, and I never get the opportunity to go from disciple, one who learns, to apostle, one who teaches. The main thing is my health and my gratefulness to God for allowing me to find that health.

I am worth it, I do deserve it but really seeing and believing it in my life comes down to the choices I make. Thatís the main thing.

I made a choice to be your friend and you made a choice to be mine.

Thatís a pretty good start donít you think?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MARCYNA 6/29/2010 3:53AM

    Wow...if you met those kids, what would you tell them????? There's a GREAT motivator in you and I think you could give a message to younger people emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 6/29/2010 3:59:33 AM

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ANNE-ELIZ 6/28/2010 11:25PM

    Yes, we did and yes, it is! emoticon

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MORTICIAADDAMS 6/28/2010 10:15PM

    It's easy to lose focus and we all need to remind ourselves why we are here on the most basic level.

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DOLLBABE56 6/28/2010 9:46PM

    Sometimes it is hard to remember that there really is a main thing in our lives. Sometimes we all need reminding what that main thing is.

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JPRICE217 6/28/2010 7:31PM

    Just trying to keep the main thing the main thing, and it seems to be different all the times. Great blog great friend

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JURI62 6/28/2010 6:59PM

    That's an awesome start! Thanks for the great blog.

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STORMTMB 6/28/2010 3:21PM

    You have a pretty smart Pastor - or quite possibly, you're tuned in to what God says to you (and him)! You make that happen by going to church regularly. You have the first main thing already taken care of!!

Now you're doing the next main thing. Thanks for sharing all of these wonderful insights with us. It's good stuff, dude! Have a great day!


Comment edited on: 6/28/2010 3:33:37 PM

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HDHAWK 6/28/2010 3:06PM

    Wonderful blog and wonderful friends here for sure!

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NEEDTOLOSE100LB 6/28/2010 2:21PM

    In my book, you are very eloquent. And, it is obvious that you are very kind and generous...qualities that make a good disciple and a wonderful apostle. Keep up the good work and continue to enjoy the journey you are on, even when you occasionally veer off track.


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KSGROTHE 6/28/2010 2:03PM

    You know, I'm really glad I found your blog to read, that I made the choice to click the link in the "Best Blogs" DailySpark blog that day to discover who you are and what you write. Your blogs really make me think!

Choices really are the Main Thing, and I need to choose to remember that! I have not been making good food choices lately (well really, for a while now), and it makes me feel bad (guilty, mostly). I am still coming back to SP almost every day, tracking my food and exercising most days. But tracking isn't enough to make up for not making good food choices.

Keep up the good work!

- Karen

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KLEONIKI 6/28/2010 11:45AM

    yes, it is!

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ALLISON145 6/28/2010 11:31AM

    You're already an apostle to me, John! Thank you for your blogs - sometimes they make me smile, sometimes they make me emotional, but they always make me think.


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JAE_HENNINGTON 6/28/2010 11:29AM

  The main thing is...I am very blessed you have you as a friend at Sparks.. what a wonderful blessing to have in my corner..

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JUDIL62 6/28/2010 11:13AM


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SUZANDALE 6/28/2010 11:09AM

    Very well said! And a good reminder of what is important!! Thanks John!

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MSSUNBUG 6/28/2010 10:17AM

    Fabulous blog, thanks for sharing.

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PRETTYBLKGYRL 6/28/2010 10:13AM

    "the main thing is the main thing" - I love it NUFF SAID!!!!

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ROCKINFOX 6/28/2010 10:02AM

    I loved this blog!! It's all about making the right choices and learning from our choices each day. emoticon

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MAWRTIAN 6/28/2010 9:42AM

    My new mantra "The main thing is the main thing"!!!! Thanks John!

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GETFIT2LIVE 6/28/2010 9:40AM

    Funny, that sounds an awful lot like something my favorite pastor (who is now enjoying his reward with Jesus) said. So easy to lose sight of the main thing in the press of life. It really does come down to choices. I remember he told the story of counseling a man who had recently come to the Lord who was struggling. He had a habit of going to the bar and always ending up drunk, and he wanted to know what to do. The pastor's advice: don't go there any more! Thanks,John!

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WALKNLOVE 6/28/2010 9:32AM

    It's kinda like keep our eyes focused on the prize! You are so right! Choices brought us here, and good choices keep us here...for ourselves, each other and for you and I, THE ONE who called us!

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well done John

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TRACYDUKA 6/28/2010 8:52AM

    Have you ever noticed that disciple and discipline are very closely related? I think that in order to be a good disciple, you must LEARN a lot of discipline. And when you get that down then you can be the teacher. That all comes with learning the right choices and exercising those choices instead of the alternative. You've given me lots to chew on, because I tend to have a hard time keeping my eye on the main thing because of all the shiny side things keep distracting me. :) I really like this blog. :) I love it when I'm forced to think about something. And that makes me evaluate things in my life and instigates change. :) You challenge me, and I need that. Thank you. :) And the best part is, you are just being you. :)

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SPARKLE1908 6/28/2010 8:51AM

    Excellent blog and a great IS all about choices!!!!

Keep up the great job you have been doing....

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KOPSBABY 6/28/2010 8:51AM

    I try to remember, and sometimes I don't, that we have the choice each morning when we wake up to either be in a good mood or bad. It's the same with food, exercise and everything else in our lives. You make wonderful points and I will try to remember these too.

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MINENA1 6/28/2010 8:44AM

    emoticon I love that!!

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MUSTANG_SALLY2 6/28/2010 8:43AM

    I've often wondered why some of the teachings I received as a child did not include a workshop on choices. It took me a very long time to figure out that choices were responsible for the path that I was on. Some days it's hard to make the right choice, no matter how much you want to reach a goal. I think that takes discipline and that's what I'm focused on this month. Great blog!


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CATHERINEL66 6/28/2010 8:22AM

    Right on target with the main thing ... keep making those better choices! We're getting better all the time (and skinnier!).

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Sometimes It's All In Your Head

Friday, June 25, 2010

Availible on You Tube @

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ANNE-ELIZ 6/27/2010 10:04PM

    Hi John,

Others have spoken eloquently about the forgiveness aspect of your blog.

The issue around your knee injury and the need to take time off your regular exercise routine is something familiar to me.

This is something that I have had to deal with numerous times, both before my Spark People days and during them.

It is always disappointing and upsetting and somehow feels like failure.

You are right about being able to learn something in this situation as in all others. What you learn will be specific to your own situation and we know we can count on you to share it.

In the meantime, if you need any help or just a sounding board, I'm here.

Comment edited on: 6/27/2010 10:08:22 PM

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BEANPOD77 6/27/2010 1:46PM

    Great blog as always John..I like your "welcome a new member" challenge and will be sure to touch base with a new person 3 X per week.
Sorry to hear about your knee..I had a hamstring pull a few weeks back. It's tough, mentally, when you have finally made exercise a part of your routine, to only have it interrupted..Make sure you let it heal fully though, because you don't want to do any damage that will take longer..Best of luck and keep us posted.

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JPRICE217 6/26/2010 11:38AM

    Great blog. WE not only need to forgive people but we need to forgive our self. Sorry about your knee. I have 4 stress fractures in my right foot with a cast on I can't walk or do much of anything. Need to learn to take it easy for a while.

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KATIEGLEN012 6/25/2010 10:25PM

    Let go...let God. I must constantly remind myself of this. Human nature is not always lovely!'

Loved the ad! Great to say I know a real celebrity!

Take care of that'll be back to your old self in a jiffy.

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HDHAWK 6/25/2010 9:55PM

    Take care of the knee John! Have a great weekend!

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DOLLBABE56 6/25/2010 4:53PM

    John, that is a great blog! Sorry about the knee though.

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JAE_HENNINGTON 6/25/2010 4:49PM

  deleted from a friend... say it isn't

found this from the daily om..said it better than I could. Great always, so glad we are friends

We Are All Mirrors for Each Other

When we look at other people, we see many of their qualities in innumerable and seemingly random combinations. However, the qualities that we see in the people around us are directly related to the traits that exist in us. "Like attracts like" is one of the spiritual laws of the universe. We attract individuals into our lives that mirror who we are. Those you feel drawn to reflect your inner self back at you, and you act as a mirror for them. Simply put, when you look at others, you will likely see what exists in you. When you see beauty, divinity, sweetness, or light in the soul of another, you are seeing the goodness that resides in your soul. When you see traits in others that evoke feelings of anger, annoyance, or hatred, you may be seeing reflected back at you those parts of yourself that you have disowned or do not like.

Because we are all mirrors for each other, looking at the people in your life can tell you a lot about yourself. Who you are can be laid bare to you through what you see in others. It is easy to see the traits you do not like in others. It is much more difficult to realize that you possess those same traits. Often, the habits, attitudes, and behaviors of others are closely linked to our unconscious and unresolved issues.

When you come into contact with someone you admire, search your soul for similarly admirable traits. Likewise, when you meet someone exhibiting traits that you dislike, accept that you are looking at your reflection. Looking at yourself through your perception of others can be a humbling and eye-opening experience. You can also cultivate in you the traits and behaviors that you do like. Be loving and respectful to all people, and you will attract individuals that will love and respect you back. Nurture compassion and empathy and let the goodness you see in others be your mirror.

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RONDAJONES 6/25/2010 2:49PM

    Not sure if you could hear me clapping for your article, but I did!

I love this blog. I have a mother and her parents (my grandparents) that do not talk anymore because of something that my grandfather said to my mom. He wasn't being mean...long story...but basically held up the truth for her to see and she didn't like it. My mom's brother...died with them not talking (and he wasn't talking to me due to associating with my mom and we were really close). Even though my grandfather is 86, health is declining FAST, and it has been over a year...she still refuses to call either of her parents. I know how UN-forgiveness can affect a person...even the people that are 'stuck in the middle'. Thanks John (and a few other comments from people) that pointed out that forgiveness is for YOUR benefit...not theirs.

I hope that your knee heals quickly...looks like a few of us need to start and injured group! I am still out with my foot/ankle/achille's tendon.

Happy weekend to you!

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WISEONE68 6/25/2010 12:55PM

    A while back, a friend told me that UNFORGIVENESS is like "drinking poison and expecting the other person to die!"

Unforgiveness generally does NOT hurt the other person--the person who hurt ue, harmed me, or whatever. It HURTS ME. It hurts my relationship with God; with others; and, with myself!!!!!

Good blog, Friend!! Hope others who need the reminder/lesson find their way here. I love encouraging is one of my spiritual gifts (I put it on the list you suggested we put together last week--talents/gifts). I try to do my best at encouraging others here on Spark and in my "everyday" life, too.

(NOTE: I have been out of the gym since Monday due to a BAD back spasm at the gym on Monday. Doctor says Monday will be my day to's amazing that I am actually looking forward to Monday emoticon).

You are awesome, dude!! Way to go!!!

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FANAMAMA 6/25/2010 10:50AM

    Hi John! I wanted to touch base with you and ask if how the new schedule of taking the weekends off from blogging have helped you find more of a balance?
I will also wait, holding my breath, until you find a lesson in your injury. I sprained my ankle on 6/15 and haven't been able to do any cardio in all this time. It's making me crazy! I should learn from you and look for the lesson.
Hope you have a fabulous weekend!

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GETFIT2LIVE 6/25/2010 10:43AM

    John, thanks for sharing this. One of the things I have learned is that the 'f' word, FORGIVENESS, is not something I need to do for the other person who has 'wronged' me in some way. It is for me, so that I can be free from the burden that holding bitterness and anger creates. God doesn't tell us to forgive to release the other person; He does it so that we can be released. The more I hang onto perceived injustices, the more I am bound up and crippled on the inside, and that often expresses itself in physical illness or addictions like food. Our desire to punish the other person for hurting us usually results in us punishing ourselves instead. Part of this journey is learning how to forgive--others AND ourselves--and move on.

Funny you should talk about how others encouraged you when you started on SP and about helping other newbies as they start. I was just thinking about that the other day and let someone else who was among the first to 'friend' me know how much that helped. I've been trying to pay it forward ever since because I wouldn't have made it this far without the support and encouragement of others who have been at this a little longer than me.

Sorry about your knee, hope the brace and rest helps it get better quickly. Running is completely addictive, so it's hard to take it easy when something happens, but you have to. Let it heal up completely and you'll be back on the road (literally!) to running soon. Nice picture in the ad, by the way!


Comment edited on: 6/25/2010 10:53:36 AM

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JENNY888 6/25/2010 10:23AM

    Those temporary annoyances with injuries are tough aren't they. It's hard to deviate from the pattern that we have learned. The great thing about it all is that we have learned hew habits and patterns and they have become part of our lives. I know you will find a way to get the exercise you need. Great blog.

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DANAB1106 6/25/2010 10:10AM

    Thank you for your blog. As a new girl videos like this really keep me going!

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Sometimes, LOL, The Stones Just Have To Suffice.....

Thursday, June 24, 2010

It's been a week. If you could peer through your computer and see my world we could all agree and nod and I could stop writing. It dont work that way. Life never stops.

Since last Friday I have had the gear shift rammed into fifth gear and the good news is I can see the finish line from where I am sitting this morning. It's been a challenge. I have stayed within my calorie limits but I have to tell you it's been on the top end. I have exercised daily to make sure I counter balanced any change in routine but............. my routine has been disrupted and quite frankly I dont care for that. It's made me hard to get along with. I crave the predictable and traveling all over God's green earth and having the challenge of eating whats put in front of you can be daunting.

It is what it is.

No heroic stories about how I found a juice bar and ate with complete nutritional bliss. Just four days chock full of challenge. They are there always for me and for you and for everyone on the face of this earth. They are the days when diamonds are at a premium and we are left to dine on the stones. That's what life gives us.

Anyone can be of good cheer when life tilts their way. I think it takes real courage and strength to slap a smile on your face and a song in your heart when things arent going picture perfect. It's hard to log your food when you see than darned line go upward. You just sort of slog through.

Early on in my journey one of my very first Spark friends allowed me to become a super hero just like she was. She wrote me and told me that it helps you through those days when you need a bit of a push. I am glad I packed my cape this trip.

Nothing overwhelming or exciting, just life, and me taking what it gives me. At least I am doing it with a smile.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUDIL62 6/28/2010 11:15AM


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KLEONIKI 6/27/2010 2:06PM

    Same experience ny dear friend:
Sometimes need to struggle to keep on the right path others things follow their way fluidly and always those sparking voices of out co-sparkers work as a reminder, enhancer, motivator or a caress...
I send you all my admiration and caress for being such a source of motivation just by keep on fighting.
I am almost alone (with my youngest) in a deserted camping... this year everybody is postponing the start of holidays.. and trying hard not to let myself through the well known road of easy , fast, soothing satisfaction in food..
But I guess it worth the effort, isn't it?
Have a nice week

Comment edited on: 6/28/2010 11:37:52 AM

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MYOWNHERO 6/26/2010 10:31PM

    Thanks for the inspiration...just think: next week is bound to be better!

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HDHAWK 6/25/2010 9:40PM

    I like predictable too John, but you're handling the changes quite well!

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STORMTMB 6/25/2010 11:59AM

    It is hard to go through life with a smile when you're meeting challenges at every turn. You've been successful in your healthy lifestyle this week partly because of your choices and partly because I suspect it's in your habits now. We all still want the big piece of chocolate cake, but you have displined yourself to make those excellent choices for your health. I know you're proud of the results (and your family is too!). Because you've made it through this challenging week, you'll be able to get through other challenging days and weeks ahead. You've gained so much inner strength (yes, you have - don't you say otherwise) and I know your faith is helping you too. Celebrate your successes this week and enjoy your weekend. Hope it's a good one.

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MARCYNA 6/25/2010 8:11AM

    Helping others....this is something you won't be able to track but I can see it all over in your blog, to me your help's the most valuable of all the tools I've found here on SP emoticon

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KSGROTHE 6/24/2010 8:53PM

    Sorry to hear that life has been so challenging for you this week, but I just have to say that when I read the title of your blog, I thought maybe you were referring to the Rolling Stones, which I found kind of funny. (Of course, it was even funnier to me when I discovered that that is not the kind of Stones to which you were referring. emoticon)

Hang in there! I'm impressed that you've stayed in your calorie range while eating what's put in front of you! emoticon

- Karen

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    There will be challenges and we will meet them on most days. The other days are just part of the learning curve.

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KAT573 6/24/2010 1:33PM

    YOU are spot on. That is the real test and the real challenge in a Lifestyle change. I, too, have had to come to terms with the fact that just because I do everything in MY power to ensure the greatest possible chance of good health, good living, etc., it ends up being just that; a possibility. Life and health remain gifts; having woken up with dyslopia, dizziness, and trigeminal pain in march of 08, I was so happy I had had the practice the first two years I was with SparkPeople so that I not only could endure this adjustment, and it was a HUGE one, but that I could grow through it. Keep on keeping ON! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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JAE_HENNINGTON 6/24/2010 12:42PM

  One of the wisest things I ever read was written by a philosopher who said, ďTo whom little is not enough, nothing is enough.Ē If you have not learned to be content in whatsoever state you find yourself, you will never be content.It sounds like you are doing ok in this. Bravo!!!!!

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NEEDTOLOSE100LB 6/24/2010 10:49AM

    Maybe you should just wear your cape under superman...and presto, chango...always ready to turn into a super hero.

Oh, that it could be so simple. Thanks for the reminder that we can be superheros, especially when life gets us down.


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WALKAWAY 6/24/2010 10:00AM

    emoticon blog.

"Anyone can be of good cheer when life tilts their way. I think it takes real courage and strength to slap a smile on your face and a song in your heart when things arent going picture perfect" hit home this morning when I was dealing with grumpy DH. He told me I was WAY TO CHEERFUL for so early in the morning. Told him someone had to try to keep a positive attitude otherwise our house would be a very unhappy home.

I'm celebrating today with a smile on my face. emoticon

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KRISSYSWIM16 6/24/2010 9:18AM

    I love the predictable as well, but unfortuantly life doesnt always go that way. I hope your cape is packed and ready. And you can do this- full steam ahead!

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CMBELISLE 6/24/2010 9:10AM

    Challenges are a part of every day life and if you can't figure out how to work with the challenges instead of against them, then you'll just create more work for yourself. Life's too short for MORE work.

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GETFIT2LIVE 6/24/2010 9:06AM

    Ain't it the truth--sometimes you just have to deal with the stones because the diamonds are pretty scarce. That's why I think us 'real' folks are the biggest winners; we are doing this in the midst of life, learning to make the best choices we can while continuing to work and care for our families and our homes and all the challenges of life. No ranch to hide out and focus all our energy on the weight loss and exercise for us; we are doing it in real time.

Gotta remember to always pack your cape for times like this; this is what it's like in the real world, where things are not picture perfect all the time and you don't have total control over your routines. It IS exciting to realize that the changes you have been making are taking root deep enough that when faced with a change in routine, you don't take that as an opportunity to throw in the towel and let things slide but rather look for ways to eat well and get in exercise whenever you can. Would you have believed that was possible six months ago? I know I wouldn't have about myself! We have come so far on this journey; there is no going back now, we are in it to win it . . .


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WALKNLOVE 6/24/2010 8:51AM

    John, you are definately one amazing & yet so real person. You have been gifted with such wonderful writing abilities! You stay positive and yet, allow us to see your vulnerabilites. Oh to have more people in the world like you....true friends, and a gift from God. You represent him well.

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JPRICE217 6/24/2010 7:41AM

    Great blog. Life happens and we do need to roll with it and make the best of it. If we did not have any challenges just think how boring our life would be.

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KATIEGLEN012 6/24/2010 7:07AM

    I so missed you! I have been on vacation...sounds like a good thing, right? And it is...only it was a bit of a challenge also. Not being able to cook for myself for 10 whole days. I had fun...tried not to worry and to error on the safe side. If we are doing all of this and not going to enjoy our life, what would be the point? We cannot let this make us nuts. I think from the sounds of it...we have learned good, healthy habits at this point and we are working with that knowledge through every step of our lives. I want for us to have interesting and varied lives. Routine makes being healthy easier. But when has life ever been consistently easy?
Let's celebrate our new found awareness and the fact that we were outside of our routine and continued our focus. Gosh darn...I think we have made progress!

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