JOHNTJ1   66,876
SparkPoints
60,000-79,999 SparkPoints
 
 
JOHNTJ1's Recent Blog Entries

Gone With The Wind

Tuesday, May 04, 2010

I have a full day in the car, with three or four stops over the next ten hours. I'll be back later this evening.

I hope everyone has a great day and thank you so much for all your love, friendship and support.

You are a great bunch of people



emoticon

Love

John

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MORTICIAADDAMS 5/6/2010 11:34AM

    Car days. Ugh. I hope you eat on plan.

Report Inappropriate Comment
SANDYK4BAMA 5/5/2010 3:04AM

    Hope you had a great day (even in the car). Remember to stretch really well when you get home. That will help those sore muscles from sitting so long!

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ROTTLADY 5/4/2010 7:52PM

    Take frequent breaks while on your travel to prevent back issues and drink your fluids as you travel through the day. Stick to your menu for the day and stay focused. emoticon. Have a good day.

Report Inappropriate Comment
LILYBELLE8 5/4/2010 3:52PM

    Hii - from your title "Gone With the Wind" I thought you might live in Idaho - where our winds have been up to 75 mph the last few days - hurricane speed, in the valleys of the Rocky Mountains? Makes no sense - but beyond that, have a good trip.

Report Inappropriate Comment
BMRBUDDY 5/4/2010 12:15PM

    Have a great day and will be looking forward to your blog!

Report Inappropriate Comment
IMJUSTDUCKIE 5/4/2010 11:42AM

    Have a wonderful day!

Report Inappropriate Comment
TXNANA_4 5/4/2010 11:11AM

    Have a great day!

Report Inappropriate Comment
BBGOOGIN 5/4/2010 10:55AM

    Ha ha, I love your title!! Have a great day!
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TRISH2229 5/4/2010 10:40AM

    Drink lots of water to stay hydrated! Be blessed!

Report Inappropriate Comment
TRIPLE_EMME 5/4/2010 10:31AM

    Have a happy and healthy day!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
YOYONOMORE1 5/4/2010 10:18AM

    John with all the traveling you do I still say "On The Road Again" should be your theme song, lol. Have a blessed day and safe traveling.

Hugs,
Shirl

Report Inappropriate Comment
STORMTMB 5/4/2010 10:01AM

    Enjoy the wind blowing through your hair, Dude! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DOLLBABE56 5/4/2010 9:50AM

    Have a good day and be safe.

Report Inappropriate Comment
SPARKENISTA 5/4/2010 9:45AM

    I hope you have a happy and productive day. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
AMYTATH 5/4/2010 9:38AM

    Have a great day, drive safe and "make great decisions" emoticon


emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TINKERBELL200 5/4/2010 9:23AM

    Have a wonderful day! Be blessed in your business!

Report Inappropriate Comment
STARLIGHT615 5/4/2010 9:13AM

    Have a safe drive!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MINENA1 5/4/2010 8:47AM

    Have a safe drive & a wonderful day! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
1888MICHELLE 5/4/2010 8:47AM

    Stop and stretch as often as you can.

Report Inappropriate Comment
KRISSYSWIM16 5/4/2010 8:44AM

    drive safe!

Report Inappropriate Comment
AMABILE75 5/4/2010 8:37AM

    emoticon Have a WONDERFUL day!! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MINIBIKKE 5/4/2010 8:37AM

    Drive safely!

Report Inappropriate Comment


Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

Finding Imperfection and Then Smiling

Monday, May 03, 2010

If you have followed the adventures of this over weight middle aged traveler, you will know that for the last two days I had checked into the Anxiety Hotel, penthouse suite, for what apprised to be an extended stay. If you haven’t read Saturday and Sundays blogs I’ll wait here while you do.

Good you’re back!!!

Without the guidance and wisdom my wife provided me I might still be stuck in my gloom. As we were getting ready to go to the gym yesterday afternoon I was struck with another feeling. It was one of relief. I’d like to tell you that the relief came from understanding where I had stumbled or failed. I’d like to tell you it came from reinforcing my plan so that I could minimize future weight gains. That’s what I’d like to tell you.

As I stuffed my back pack I was hit with this wonderful sense of relief that I no longer had to be perfect. See, I have had fourteen consecutive weight losses for sixty pounds before yesterday. That works out to around three pounds per week. Every time I would lose some weight I wouldn’t do the happy dance, there was part of me that went “Oh crap. Now I have to do it again next week.”

As an overweight person I know that I spend a lot of time compensating. I do not fit in to the men’s equivalent of a size zero but somewhere deep in my psyche I think I should. But I don’t and then things get all crazy. That means, my evil twin, also known as my ego, says we have to be a lot better than everyone else just to be equal with everyone else. In other words we have to be perfect.

Until yesterday morning I was like a dog chasing his tail. I created this really vicious cycle that with each weeks weigh in, the stakes got higher and higher and I found it harder and harder to be perfect.

I wasn’t eating enough and what I was eating fulfilled an immediate need but didn’t give me what I needed to sustain myself and to lose some of this weight. I threw reason and rational thinking out the window. I have seen this coming for a couple of weeks now. It’s like going to Vegas with the mortgage money.

“One donut won’t hurt!!! “

“Ah it didn’t!!! Cool I’ll have another this week.” (BTW you don’t need to write it down.)

Two steps forward for every one step back. That’s what we are taught here isn’t it?

I do not have to be perfect. I just have to be John and you sitting there reading this have to be you. When we first joined Spark People we were asked to sign a little pledge card. Mine still hangs on the fridge. I looked at it before I wrote this blog and I am quite sure that no where does it say we have to be perfect from now until the end of time. It says “I promise to make healthy and positive choices so that I can have live a healthy life style and reach my goals.” Pretty straight forward and simple. No mention of perfection.

The real beauty of what happened to me this weekend exists on a lot of different levels and as you read this you may find a few more that apply to you.
First I am blessed to have the guidance, support and wisdom of my family, especially my wife. I have a daughter in law in culinary school who is a “healthy chef” and truly is a size zero. She gives me a lot of recipes for good tasting food without paying that “gourmet calorie price.” The rest of my kids encourage me and some of them have amped up their exercise.

I have you guys. I quit reading all the supportive comments on my blogs and my Spark page around ten last night because my eyes were watering. Wow. You wanna talk about an out pouring of love!!! I was over whelmed by it.

Here is my point: Every one of us has people, places and things in our lives that help us make a difference and keep us on the path most days. You and I have Spark in common, but I’ll bet if we sat down and had a cup of coffee we’d find out we had a lot more in common than that.

Lean on each other, support each other and to those of you who are feeling the strain and maybe leaving this experience I tell you this:

“You do not have to be perfect; you just have to be you. The last time I looked we take all comers here, no matter how silly they get some times.”

Just ask me, I know

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BUNNYCATS 6/7/2010 8:07AM

    Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering.
There is a crack in everything,
That's how the light gets in.
~Leonard Cohen

Report Inappropriate Comment
MORTICIAADDAMS 5/6/2010 11:31AM

    Perfection can be very dull. Some of the coolest things come from aberration like albino squirrels.

Report Inappropriate Comment
JURI62 5/5/2010 11:01PM

    John, thanks for the heartfelt blog. You are an inspiration. I'm struggling with the last 10 lbs to my goal weight and some days it feels like it might as well be 100.
Reading your blogs gives me encouragement, so thank you.
Judy

Report Inappropriate Comment
4DOGNIGHT 5/5/2010 8:51AM

    Thank you for being you, my new best friend and blogger! I love your postive attitude, even in the face of adversity! You might want to read my blog of today.

Report Inappropriate Comment
1DERLAND_BOUND 5/4/2010 4:24PM

    Wow, you are an inspiration. Thank you.

Report Inappropriate Comment
KBUCKMASH 5/4/2010 4:14PM

    John,
Love how you tell it like it is. For some of us who still have a certain about of fear factor in us to make the full commitment to all the tools Spark has to offer because ....(whatever excuse a person has) you have shown we need to get rid of that fear and take a leap of faith. For if we do not take a step, then another, another, another and still another we are standing still. Will we stumble back? More then likely. Will it hurt us? Maybe our pride. Can we recover? From your example - yes we can.
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
HLPRATT 5/4/2010 1:37PM

    I don't think it's that unusual to gain or not to lose at times. It's hard to keep up the momentum or to be perfect all the time. The important thing is not to give up completely and just to keep at it

Report Inappropriate Comment
TINKERBELL200 5/4/2010 9:31AM

    You got it John, you don't have to be perfect, just you, which is a pretty awesome guy! emoticon
Lynne

Report Inappropriate Comment
STARLIGHT615 5/4/2010 9:21AM

    I just love reading your blogs!! They make me feel so much better and but all my little set back into perseptive (Sp?) thank you!! emoticon Your writings are truely an inspiration and a blessing!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LESA2.0 5/4/2010 8:13AM

    Thanks again for your honesty and insight. Reading your blogs always puts me back in the right frame of mind. I too suffer from "perfectioninsm" and am trying to change this harmful attitude. You are helping me along my path, my friend.

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DOLLBABE56 5/4/2010 7:42AM

    I would like to say that I have been as consistent "loser" as you, but I can't. You are doing great. I'm glad you realize that.

Report Inappropriate Comment
KATIEGLEN012 5/4/2010 5:29AM

    It is positively amazing that you describing your imperfections allows me to feel ok with mine. It is a humbling experience. I remain grateful that you share.

Report Inappropriate Comment
KLEONIKI 5/4/2010 3:39AM

    You certainly belong to the "winning team",dear friend!
Grateful for all the burdens that teach us how to fight but also GRATEFUL for all this assistance in abundance..!
Take care!
Kleoniki

Report Inappropriate Comment
KLEONIKI 5/4/2010 3:39AM

    You certainly belong to the "winning team",dear friend!
Grateful for all the burdens that teach us how to fight but also GRATEFUL for all this assistance in abundance..!
Take care!
Kleoniki

Report Inappropriate Comment
MYRNACARRIER 5/4/2010 1:22AM

    Boy, I have read a lot of your blogs and they are making me cry.
You are so open and vulnerable with us.
Thanks for being so real. God has made you a very special person. Keep on taking care of yourself because we need you in the world. I am going to subscribe to your blog. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MITCHPOOH 5/3/2010 11:15PM

    Perfection.. I try so hard to be perfect and I'm not.. Thank you so much for what you wrote.. I need to learn to just be me.. and nothing else matters...Acceptance from others has been hard for me and I think that is why I strive for that perfection that doesn't exist

Report Inappropriate Comment
SPARKENISTA 5/3/2010 10:24PM

    Everything we go through has a lesson behind it. However, I don't see you taking a moment to stand back and give yourself credit for a remarkable weight loss so far.

Report Inappropriate Comment
HAWAIILINDA 5/3/2010 10:11PM

    Another good blog, thanks!
Linda

Report Inappropriate Comment
TEDYBEAR2838 5/3/2010 9:58PM

    WOW, I been there done that and it is a bit of a letdown at first, but then you realize you are not perfect and don't have to have others think you are perfect. What a relief is right!~

You are a total inspiration to all of us, gain or loss, thick or thin.

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ROTTLADY 5/3/2010 9:28PM

    You have a great wife, hope you appreciate her. Welcome to the real world.Everything we put in or near our mouths counts in the end.Glad you were able to go to the gym. Traveling so much has to be hard.
emoticon emoticon stay positive.

Report Inappropriate Comment
CATHERINEL66 5/3/2010 9:13PM

    Dang ... I am mumbling to myself about fourteen weeks of non-stop weight loss! At my snail's pace of a pound every other week, I'm too awed by all that fabulous progress to think past it, LOL!

I think it's great you're continuing forward ... keep on going!



Report Inappropriate Comment
JAKEANDNELLIE 5/3/2010 7:58PM

    I remember how relieved I was the first time I "slipped" and immediately got back on the wagon - it was important to know that I could do that and continue making progress. It was a freedom from having to be perfect, just like you said!
Now, I don't panic when I gain a few pounds - I know the reasons why and they involved choices I made. I can make the choice to return to my program and get on with becoming a healthier me.
Stay positive,
Sheila

Report Inappropriate Comment
IDALUKE 5/3/2010 7:57PM

    That is so true, I just like the way you are, You have such fantastic blogs I love them emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
FANAMAMA 5/3/2010 3:33PM

    Phew. What a relief! You're NOT perfect after all. Welcome to the club! We're glad you're here! emoticon
I happen to love you just the way you are.

Report Inappropriate Comment
BARB3284 5/3/2010 3:10PM

    When I made the goal of getting below 190 by May 1, I got obsessed with the scale and sabatoged myself. That scale became my judge and executioner. I, too, had to go back and remember EXACTLY what it was I was aiming for---eating healthy and being fit, NOT a number, not winning a competition with myself.

Report Inappropriate Comment
GRACEISENUF 5/3/2010 3:03PM

    Great blog! I read the one about your one pound weight loss first and I though to myself.....Pefectionism can be our biggest battle in life.

No one is perfect, not one. If I beat myself up every time I failed at something I wouldn't have any joy in my life. Glad to see you have cut yourself some slack...YOU ARE A WINNER! You will suceed as you continue to have faith.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MARCYNA 5/3/2010 2:42PM

    I 'm learning too emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
BOHEMIANCAT 5/3/2010 2:30PM

    Well, John,
I saw an answer to your blog on another blog... the snowball effect, right?
I like what you have to say and feel much the same way. We are in this together and all my best wishes go to you!
Linda

Report Inappropriate Comment
BMRBUDDY 5/3/2010 2:07PM

    Hi John,

I just came across your page and really enjoyed your blog and sense of humor. I had to go back and read several others. I would love to add you to my friend list.

Very inspiring! Kate

Report Inappropriate Comment
GEEMAWEST 5/3/2010 2:02PM

    We're here for you! Always!

Report Inappropriate Comment
HVMBRU 5/3/2010 1:59PM

    Something just clicked again, and again and when will I just accept it and remember. What I do is give the donut (or whatever) my power over me. Simple as that. And when I am aware of what I am doing or about to do, then I have the power to stop.



Report Inappropriate Comment
WEEZIE1122 5/3/2010 1:59PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
BECCALYNN75 5/3/2010 1:44PM

    I was watching TV this weekend and can't remember what it was on (maybe a music video?) but someone had a sticky note on their computer that said (something like) "I will make better mistakes tomorrow". Yes, we're going to make mistakes everyday but hopefully they aren't the same ones we made today. If we keep improving ourselves and our lives, we'll just be making better mistakes.

Report Inappropriate Comment
HVMBRU 5/3/2010 1:36PM

    So glad I came across your blogs! Just one comment - You are so fortunate you can stop at one donut. Ha! I may be good one day but then the next, I eat 2 and on and on it goes! Makes me realize how I lost my 25 lbs. - I was perfect! I guess I am just one of those people who can't indulge at all. But more power to you!

If you have any suggestions let me know. . .I sure hate being this way.

Helen

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUSIEMILO 5/3/2010 1:28PM

    It's a good lesson to learn, and one that resonates with all of us. Good to hear that you're back to good habits, and I think it won't be too long before you will be reporting to all of us that you kicked that 1.2 to the curb, and some more along with it!


Report Inappropriate Comment
SKIPPELM 5/3/2010 12:37PM

    HI John,
Wow, amazing! I am new to the Spark and so thrilled I cam across your blog. Even though I'm in my first week, I've already been dreading the weight that is always trouble for me. As soon as I lose enough to get there I panic and do an about face and gain all the weight back. And this time around I'm trying to figure out why- thank you so much for finding the answer for me!! It is all aobut perfection, it's this pressure I put on myself without even realizing it, pressure that says you only lost 1 lb this week, or pressure that says you wont get any lower than x weight- you get my drift. Anyhow, this was a huge eye opener for me- THANK YOU! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
BESTSUSIEYET 5/3/2010 12:03PM

    It hadn't occurred to me that with each week of continued success came a sense of "gotta stay perfect" -- but I know you are right. And I recognized myself in the comment about the bad choice last week didn't cause me to gain, so I can do it again this week. Keep on telling us the truth -- and we'll learn to believe it! Thanks again, John! Have a blessed week of wise choices!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
RHAL1462 5/3/2010 11:49AM

    You re very insightful. Thanks for letting us know we don't have to be perfect either. We are who we are and we need to learn to love us anyway don't we.


I have read you last 3 blogs and find you to be inspiring. Thank you. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MINENA1 5/3/2010 11:43AM

    John you're amazing! You're SO right! We DON'T have to be perfect. Nobody is asking us to be perfect. Thank you so much for your blog. You are WONDERFUL!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
CHANGE_4_ME 5/3/2010 11:37AM

    Just came across your blog. One word- uplifting! Hang in there!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
YOYONOMORE1 5/3/2010 10:33AM

    Hi John, somehow I had missed the last two blogs so went back and read them. Glad you have recognized you don't need to be perfect, come on, who on this earth can be totally perfect, no one that I know of. We are human beings and will act like human beings, what we can do though is each day try and be the best we can for that day. I am so glad you are with us on this journey, your blogs add much to my days and you have a way of putting things so very well. Oh, yes, last but not least be thankful for that good woman who stands beside you. You are blessed. Have a great Monday.

Hugs,
Shirl

Report Inappropriate Comment
STILLPOINT 5/3/2010 10:32AM

    JOhn, I loved your blog. Thank you for being so honest! YOu are back on track and learned a huge lesson last week!

I am sooooooooooooooooooo not perfect!!! I have been doing a lot of tweaking. I know I generally eat healthy and am active. All I need to do is step it up a tiny bit and I'll lose the weight. There are times when I think - LOSER! Why can't you keep this up. But mostly, I know I just need to be good to myself, good to my body by feeding it healthy food, exercising, yoga, and taking care of myself. And to never never quit.

Looking forward to hearing more about you! Have a great week.

Report Inappropriate Comment
-H0LY-Y0GA- 5/3/2010 10:14AM

    Just found your blog and have read the last three entries. Such wonderful realism and encouragement. Thank you!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEVENIRBELLE 5/3/2010 9:27AM

    Thanks for your blog. I have been a perfect SP for the last two months as a newbie. And I was so proud to reward myself when I hit the two month mark. But along with the pride came a let down. I was seeing that now I have to do this again for another two months. It did not seem fair. I got discouraged. I decided that I needed a break from all this perfection. I took the weekend to break the routine. I had some white wine, Orville Smart Popcorn and I did not do my usual exercise routine. And today is Monday and I am back on track. We all need a break. It is life. We are not robots. And as they say in the program, we need to be consistent. THe message is over time that we follow a better way of eating and behaving is what is important. A few days is OK to keep us going. I had some guilt but I let it go so I could enjoy my sabbatical!

Good job! Thanks for sharing. This was a message I needed to hear.

Report Inappropriate Comment
JAE_HENNINGTON 5/3/2010 9:11AM

  John,I love your insights, as I consider myself a very insightful person. What makes you unique. You are not afraid to share yourself with us. Every word you write is open and honest and heart felt. I find comfort in what you write from your heart. I am on a road to open myself up to others, not a easy thing to do when I was always taught that is not the best thing to do... your writings touch my heart giving me strength and hope. Wishing for you a wonderful monday with lots of smiles

Report Inappropriate Comment
CATHERINEL66 5/3/2010 8:59AM

    John I am SHOCKED that you ate a donut and didn't put it on your food tracker! OMG!

Glad you have your spark back and see the middle way.

Report Inappropriate Comment
CMBELISLE 5/3/2010 8:52AM

    Funny how our acknowledgment of our imperfections helps us reach our goals better than trying to be perfect.

Last week wasn't the greatest for me food-wise either and your blog reinforced my thought that I'm not alone and that I really don't have to be perfect. I just have to keep at it, keep adjusting and never give up.

Thanks for being a friend and have a great week!

Report Inappropriate Comment
GREENCAT1 5/3/2010 8:52AM

    John you always say the things that I need to hear. I am so glad that perfection is not part of this process. I attended a popular weight loss program years ago and I had to quit when I heard the women behind me, as we were in line for weigh in, discussing how "bad" they were because they had an extra diet chocolate pudding! I can't handle that mentality! We aren't "bad" even when we have a donut or two! It is just a matter of getting back on the path to wellness. I want to be healthy - so do you - it is a life long process - and it truly is a joy. Nothing compares to the freedom of losing the fat that holds us captive inside our bodies. Nothing compares to the feeling of being able to move your body, of sleeping well, and of the feeling of well-being that comes after a healthy meal, eaten with mindfullness. Thank you again, friend, for saying it all. (I think I just wrote my blog for today! i am copying and pasting this one! emoticon



Love you,

Cathy emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
AMABILE75 5/3/2010 8:39AM

    We are so lucky to have a friend like you behind us John. You are so great at offering perspective, always so supportive and your blogs are always thoughtful and inspiring.

Thank you for being you!!! You are wonderful!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

A Setback and A Lesson Learned

Sunday, May 02, 2010

Every morning I receive a small meditation via email. It’s something I have done since the late eighties. A friend gave me the book for a birthday present and in close to twenty years it’s been torn and mutilated to the point it was falling apart. I was really happy to discover that it was online. (What isn’t!!!) Every morning when I open my email I get a little motivation right out of the gate.

This morning’s first line reads as follows:

“To conquer adverse circumstance, conquer yourself.”

This morning was not a good morning for a lot of reasons. For the first time since joining Spark I had a weight gain. It was only 1.2 pounds but I am not going to lie to you, it devastated me. Gosh, I really thought all of those old feelings had gone away when I started losing weight. Guess what? They all returned. I got scared, the hyperventilating type of scared. I cried, just a little. My shoulders slumped and in my mind it was the beginning of the end.

Thank goodness for my wife. Seriously or they’d be preparing the papers to admit to a chocolate rehab facility. There is not a lot that flusters Joan. The first question she asked me was “Are you going to have breakfast soon because if you are I’ll wait and eat with you.” Nerves of steel.

As we ate she looked over her glasses at me and posed this question “If you were one of your coaching clients and they called you this morning, what would you tell them?”

I thought for a minute and said “I’d ask them to write down what they thought went wrong, where their behavior had changed from previous weeks and then put together an action plan to correct it. I’d tell them to put the plan into place and move forward and quit acting like the world ended.”

Joan smiled over her cup of coffee. Game, set and match.

After breakfast I went downstairs and took out my legal pad. What had I done differently? In a nutshell I had gotten sloppy and lazy. I was tracking my food but seriously, who needed to write down everything? After all, if I took a handful of chips, it was okay because I had ramped up my cardio. (Any of this sound familiar to anyone?)

Lazy produces results just like healthy activity produces results only it’s not the kind of results I am looking for. I got cocky and full of myself and figured that the weight would just fall off no matter what. It was small things. I never deviated from my calories but I was close to the top end all week which meant with all my little “cheats” I was over the line. I got lazy by eating out four nights out of seven because I said I was tired, too tired to cook. Oh, I ate healthy, LOL, restaurant healthy.

“To conquer adverse circumstance, conquer yourself.”

I need to tighten a few loose bolts, no big over haul, just getting back to basics. While I am in phase three, I pulled out The Spark and am going back to phase one for a week so I can relearn those good habits that got me started.

It’s a wakeup call and thank goodness it was only a 1.2 pound wake up call. My generally positive attitude is coming back and I don’t feel as devastated. I’ll get there and so will you. We are all in this together and I am grateful for all your support, as always.

In one of his epistles Paul says something about “Keeping your eye on the prize.” That’s really good advice, especially this morning.

Oh yeah. I also noted during all this, as I have known for a long time "Behind every sucessful man stands a wise woman."

Have a blessed Sunday

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SMILINGSARA 5/17/2010 6:39PM

    I understand completely. You described the way I am feeling today. Thanks for posting your feelings and how you were able to stay on track.

Report Inappropriate Comment
BETHANNEBEL 5/8/2010 11:34AM

  I really like this blog. I too am struggling with the little "cheats" and justifying the reasons why it is okay to do so. I plan to do better this week and now I know I can. You are so right about us all being in this together. I am glad I am not alone.
Thanks!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SHEILAKHS1 5/6/2010 2:32PM

    great blog...i have been sitting reading them. i was having a rough time staying motivated and one of my Spark freind told me to stop by your page...i am really glad she led me to yours

Report Inappropriate Comment
TREKJUNKIE 5/6/2010 12:30PM

    Thank you for sharing. I never stick to diets because I get discouraged if I have even one setback. This is encouraging and I will remember it anytime I stumble!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MALEXANDER4 5/6/2010 11:29AM

    Thank you. I myself had been self sabataging myself...now i'm back on track. This is a new week with a whold new set of rules for me...Good luck to you.

Report Inappropriate Comment
EVETROY 5/5/2010 11:31PM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TONIABLAKE 5/5/2010 10:12PM

    Beautifully written. I am grateful too for a wonderfully supportive partner. My husband never gets flustered either and encourages and reassures as I need it.

Report Inappropriate Comment
CHRISTINEW1984 5/5/2010 9:53PM

  Very inspiring---thank you!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JMCADE 5/5/2010 8:26PM

    Great blog, I think we all go through this. It is good that you have the support that you needed. We should all be that lucky. I am glad that you turned it around right away and did not wallow in your misery!

Report Inappropriate Comment
CARUNION 5/5/2010 8:07PM

  I had a 1.5 lb weight gain this week and your blog expressed exactly my recent behavior.I ate a bite of this as I prepared dinner or sampled a treat at work.When I waas presented with the results i was dissappointed to say the least.BUt like you a have a wise and wonderful wife,I have a terrific husaband whoe reminded me to simply get back on track-that this was a journey nota judgement. MY lovey is right! I have wonderful support-SP is the greatest gift and I embrace my journey-roadblocks and all.

Report Inappropriate Comment
CRYSAFROG 5/5/2010 3:09PM

    Excellent blog and so close to what I am going through in my own journey right now. I guess I never equated the plateau I am on (or any weight gain) to me being cocky, but it totally fits. I, too, have "little cheats" and those little cheats are turning into a huge cheat to my new lifestyle.

Thank you for the reality check.

Good luck to you in your journey.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MOM_TO_6 5/5/2010 2:02PM

  Inspiring, thank you! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
STACYLEIGH09 5/5/2010 12:33PM

    Great Blog!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MSLANG1 5/5/2010 10:36AM

  Good read and great reminder that the small things do count. Often, in many aspects of life, we have to return to the basics to continue moving forward. emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SK3333 5/5/2010 9:41AM

    This is the stuff! Thanks for sharing.

Report Inappropriate Comment
FITCHIC75 5/5/2010 9:24AM

    Well said.

Report Inappropriate Comment
TWICETHEMAN 5/5/2010 9:15AM

    Doctor heal thyself, Coach coach thyself. Good insight and good coaching advice for the wife.

Report Inappropriate Comment
THINFROG 5/5/2010 9:04AM

    Great Blog!!! I only started here a few weeks ago, and even though I have been really good about staying in my calories and working out daily, I have just experienced my 1st set back and it has me bummed. I am still not sure where I went wrong, but I will keep plugging away.....Hope you have a great week!

Report Inappropriate Comment
ADREAMA 5/5/2010 6:21AM

    Excellent blog. thanks for sharing, it gave me a giggle with your wifes wisdom.
I can so relate re the little cheats and extra exercise. The main thing I learned over the last year of slipping the weight back on...while I could kid myself that the 'little cheats' here and there were not doing too much damage. the reality is that they do and they have.
The only way I have ever succeeded at weight loss is to religiously write down everything that goes in my mouth. If I cant track it, I cannot put it in my mouth. That is what I have to do to succeed at this, so that is what I will do.


Report Inappropriate Comment
HEARTSTOPPER 5/5/2010 12:30AM

   
Good blog!

Report Inappropriate Comment
KRISTIEE1 5/5/2010 12:15AM

    great blog!!!! sound like your wife is wonderful support My DHis my support system and is also the one who makes me see we all make mistakes but we dont give up cause there is light at the end of the tunnel!! good luck you can do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
TAMMYFOX3 5/4/2010 10:14PM

    Thank you for sharing!!! I been on diet for almost 2 weeks have not lost a pound but i think now everyday before i put any thing in my mouth is this gonna help me reach my goal and it keeps me in check!!!! My sig other is on the same diet and he lost 5 pounds but i cant be mad got to keep jogging along!!! I have faith that we can all do this with the support we got going on here!!! My mind is so full with great information thats here is these pages!!!! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ETPHONEHOME9092 5/4/2010 9:23PM

  Thanks for sharing.

Report Inappropriate Comment
4ABETTERMETODAY 5/4/2010 8:53PM

    I enjoyed reading your blog. Thanks for sharing.

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEBIJEANB 5/4/2010 5:58PM

  We have all been there and being hard on ourselves is our worse enemy.Just remember too love yourselve and know that none of us our perfect.Get back on the horse and start a new day. You can not change the past just learn from it. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TIFF38 5/4/2010 5:51PM

    I have NEVER had a weight loss that has stuck. I will have a low weight and then I will gain a little... ALWAYS, I guess it is just how my body acts, so I never get upset, I still feel a little frustrated, but I know that I will loose the next weigh in. (Well except for the month of April.... somehow I didn't loose a single pound :(
I am a life coach!! I just have not worked as one for a while, wanting to get back into it. I feel ready and like I have better tools this time around.
Have a great day!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LYNNSHARON1 5/4/2010 5:36PM

  Right on, I too had a slow start this week, ate way to much over the weekend. I guess we all have some faults.

Report Inappropriate Comment
SWEETNEENI 5/4/2010 5:22PM

    Great blog! Glad you are back on track emoticon WOOOOO-WOOOOO!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MYLIFEROCKS 5/4/2010 5:18PM

    Wonderful blog!! Love your positivity and your wife rocks!!! emoticon

Thank you for sharing!!

Bev

Report Inappropriate Comment
BABYLOBO3 5/4/2010 4:42PM

    Awesome, thank you...Tina emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MAJOOD85 5/4/2010 3:46PM

    Thanks for sharing!
Reading this post was like me talking to myself...
I gained weight this week... and I was so pissed at first... but then I had to get myself back together... instead of being mad and stopping the exercising and not writing everything down and making things even worse... we have to get back on track and GET BACK what we gained last week!! Stay strong... you can do this!

Comment edited on: 5/4/2010 3:51:00 PM

Report Inappropriate Comment
ANUT4DISNEY 5/4/2010 2:31PM

    Awesome blog. Thank you for posting it, gives me a lot to think about.

Have a great day.

Shirley

Report Inappropriate Comment
GARYJAN 5/4/2010 1:15PM

    Thanks for the very helpful Blog. You have a wise wife and you are pretty sharp yourself!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MCFERRET 5/4/2010 12:39PM

    Good plan - although I think you are a little too hard on yourself. My weight can fluctuate as much as 8 pounds in a week! I try not to get frustrated by it and have gone to weighing myself less frequently. I think keeping the eye and goal on healthy is surpassing the weight only goal. Should you evaluate what is different? Yes! and fix it, if it needs fixing. Get out of sorts - hard to avoid, but try not to. Chin up - we are on this road for a lifetime!

Report Inappropriate Comment
KEEPITSIMPLE_ 5/4/2010 12:33PM

    Thank you! You have hit the nail right on the head. I've had a start to the week pretty much like yours and I'm sure it's directly related to the poor choices I made Friday, Saturday and Sunday. I must have let all those wonderful compliments go straight to my head. Definitely a lesson learned!! Kudos to your wife too for her support in a way that didn't make you feel even worse!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
NANASNOW 5/4/2010 12:29PM

    Awesome Blog. Smart Wife. Good Plan.

Report Inappropriate Comment
BERKLEYGIRL 5/4/2010 12:22PM

    Great blog and good timing for me too. I've lost some ground the last few weeks and I have such a hard time getting started again after I've "slipped". I feel so down on myself and defeated.... Truly it's amazing to me though that this is your first little gain in your journey! That's actually very impressive. I can't go more than two months without posting at least one gain blip. Thanks for the reminders and encouraging blog.

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LOOSE40DEBDEB 5/4/2010 12:09PM

  It's amazing how easy it is to have those little cheats. I can't afford to eat out that much but make up for in those little cheats. Thanks for bringing it all back to reality.

Report Inappropriate Comment
PRAYINGSUZIE 5/4/2010 12:09PM

    Thank you so much for sharing. God bless.

Suzie

Report Inappropriate Comment
DRADISCH 5/4/2010 11:06AM

    Thank you, Thank You Thank You. I just posted on activity that I gained & so ashamed of myself. You hit me right on the mark with what you did & said. Today is my new beginning again.I am starting over with 1 also. I need to get over Restaurant healthy too. The the things i didn't put down that put me over too.
Way to go.
Donna

Report Inappropriate Comment
KARENV986 5/4/2010 10:57AM

  What a blessing you have in your wife! Great action plan - you know what to do. All the tools are at your disposal, you just have to put them to work. Have a great week - I predict those pounds will be gone along with a few more. God bless!

Report Inappropriate Comment
NEEDTOLOSE100LB 5/4/2010 9:54AM

    Isn't it interesting how we can be our own best friend and our own worst enemy. We can make excuses for ourself that we won't for someone else. Keeping focused on that "prize", whatever it may be, is definitely good advice. It keeps us grounded, without time or need to make excuses.
Here's to our prizes and keeping our lives simple.

Laurie

Report Inappropriate Comment
BRINAGU3 5/4/2010 9:25AM

    This was very good for me to read this morning. Thank you for sharing it.

Report Inappropriate Comment
UKTHIRI 5/4/2010 9:11AM

    Wow! The truth will set you free. Right! I loved your blog, and I know that you will be successful. You know how I know? No one can be that honest with themselves and EVERYONE else, and not succeed.

You're going to meet your goals. In fact, I predict you will exceed them. Spark on!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DAWNDMOORE40 5/4/2010 8:42AM

    I think we are both blessed to have such supportive people to spend our lives with! I am getting married in July and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with my best friend!
He is very supportive of my lifestyle changes and he even cooks for me so when I come in that door after 6'oclock in the evening, I don't have to start cooking. He works nights and he likes to cook because that is what he went to school for.

Anyway, I guess I started rambling on about myself when this blog is supposed to be about how proud I am of you that you recognized the areas that were weak and you are doing what is necessary to get yourself back on track! It sounds like you both or people of faith and that is wonderful because God never gives us more then we can handle!

Have a good day and stay forcused! emoticon

Comment edited on: 5/4/2010 8:43:41 AM

Report Inappropriate Comment
JULIA_211 5/4/2010 8:27AM

    You are both lucky to have each other! emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ZIPPYSPINK1 5/4/2010 8:00AM

    thank you so much for yourtruthful experience , It certainly was an encouragment to me.I really wish I knew something to say to you that would encourge you. the only thing that comes to mind is.
"WITH GOD BEFORE US WHO CAN BE AGAINST US" thANK YOU AND YOUR WIFE emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MARTHA6163 5/4/2010 7:08AM

    Thanks for blogging this. It has helped me also. God bless.

Report Inappropriate Comment
EGGENS 5/4/2010 6:12AM

    You have a wise wife! And you are a wise man to listen and put the action plan into motion. I know this will be a good week for you!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SLIMLADY133 5/4/2010 5:36AM

  Thank you for your posting. Your blog reminds me of a small book my mom gave me years ago when I went off to college, so I wouldn't lose my way. (Streams in the Desert) I recently have come back to SP, I started 2 years ago@ a healthy weight/BMI and wanted to slim down to my college hey day weight. (Hence the tag 133) As life would have it I went the Oopposite Direction (spelling intentional) I gained 23 lbs in 2 years and am now at an overweight an unhealthy BMI. Not to mention that's like a pound every month. If you have any advice for me Id gladly take some. Thank you for putting this post out there I realize I have to go over my journal, find out where I went off track and go back to the basics of phase 1. Thanks. And God bless.

Report Inappropriate Comment


Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

The Day Before My Weigh In and A Plea To Those Who Have Reached Their Goals

Saturday, May 01, 2010

Today is the day before my weekly weigh in.

Every Sunday morning I get on the scale and I weigh in. The world holds its breath. The night before I write down my previous week’s weight on a sticky note and put it on the bathroom wall. I place the scale in the same spot. I have a pen handy to immediately record my current weight. My computer is left on and set to Spark. Air traffic control clears a corridor so I can enter said weight almost immediately after it is taken. Oh yeah, I weigh myself twice, just to be sure.

Today I am a nervous wreck. Quiz question number one: What do fat people do when they get nervous? They eat. Every flaw from the past week is exposed during this twenty four hour period. I can forget to pay for the newspaper, why can’t I forget every last crumb I ate this week? Will the ice cream come back to haunt me? What about the potato chip I took off the table last Sunday night? Oy vey!!! All day long I pace like a lion. How will I face my friends if I gain weight? Is it the beginning of the end?

I’m exaggerating, but not by much. LOL

This all crossed my mind an hour or so ago when I was sweating up a storm. A year ago, on a rainy Saturday, I would be perched in front of the television with enough snacks to feed a small nation. Today I logged seventy minutes of cardio. Maybe that’s not a whole lot to some of you but it is to me, and I am proud of it.
So it gets me around to my real reason for writing today. This goes out to you folks who have reached your goal:

Please do not leave. I need you (I am not ashamed to grovel!!!)

You have every reason to be happy, excited and pleased. Please don’t leave here just because you have had success, I need you. Your work is not done. For every one of you who has weathered the storm, there are about ten thousand of us still struggling and we need to hang around with good people who are good role models, who have made it to their goals.

I’m successful to a degree. I’ve lost sixty pounds, and it scares me. I need your positive example. I need your help. You been there, you’ve done that. Saturdays are a lot more fun than they were a year ago, I want them to be even more fun a year from now.

Could ya help……….. Please?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MERALO 5/6/2010 6:17AM

    You only weigh twice??? That's impressive on its own! I weigh about 5 or 6 times...get off, check that the scale is set properly to zero and go again....get off, remove any clothing I think is affecting me and get on again...
emoticon
I'm not at my goal yet, but I can relate to your story...I also used to sit with enough food to feed an army and watch the TV all night, every night. The most exercise I got was lifting my butt off the couch and going to bed. And now? Whole different story and I'm loving it!
Keep going!
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ADELE66 5/6/2010 6:06AM

    When I started reading your blog, I felt a kindred weighing-in spirit!

Thank you - awesome blog!

:o)

Report Inappropriate Comment
DRURY23 5/5/2010 10:48PM

    We all know exactly how you feel... As I get closer to my goal I'm scared that when I raise my calorie intake to maintain that I'll gain instead. So I know that fear you're talking about. The people on here are so wonderful and supportive that even if, I mean WHEN, I reach my goal, I've made great friends I want to continue to stay in touch with, to encourage them, but to also help me stay on track and maintain that goal.

We're here for you! Hang in there!

Thanks for the chuckle about your weigh in routine!!

Laurie

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
NANASNOW 5/5/2010 3:31PM

    To those who have made weight, we who are behind you, do ask for your assistance! I join in the plea for help!

Report Inappropriate Comment
NEWLIFE4ME09 5/5/2010 1:55PM

    You can do it, well we can do it, of course if I could just get under 300, I would start believing it more


keep up the good work emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
4DOGNIGHT 5/5/2010 8:54AM

    The scariest thing in the world might be to lose all the weight you want to lose and than have to admit to yourself that you aren't fat anymore. You will have to live your life as a thin person and what will that mean? Kind of a subject for a new blog don't you think?

Report Inappropriate Comment
WIGIME 5/5/2010 7:37AM

    John - Once again you have made me laugh when sharing your thoguhts about the scale. I have no doubt in my mind that you will make your goal since we are all in this together!

Keep up the good work and THANKS for your blog!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
C-MERRIE11 5/5/2010 1:07AM

    I really appreciate you being here on this blog- your attitude, commitment and successes are an inspiration and a help. Thanks for your vulnerability, I know I am really grateful for those on the site who have made it through to their goals. Thanks for saying what I was thinking. And right now you are one of those people to me and many others- thanks for being here! Great post!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LADY_KATHY 5/4/2010 11:23PM

    Congrats on your successes so far... wishes for more to come... keep focused... keep Sparking... you can do anything you strive to.

Report Inappropriate Comment
LUSHON 5/4/2010 10:07PM

    You've accomplished a lot so far--Yeay! I agree with you--we need each other!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LINDABENEDICT 5/4/2010 6:56PM

    Well good for you !!!!! Keep up the good work !

Report Inappropriate Comment
HAVERYJ 5/4/2010 4:19PM

    I wanted to let you know that you give me the same inspiration that you get from those you send your plea to. To see how hard you've worked, and that you used to be in my "scared" shoes, motivates me that I CAN do it. It's my hope that once i've lost more weight, you don't leave. Because I'll need the same continued motivation from people like you!

Report Inappropriate Comment
STARRYK 5/4/2010 4:16PM

    I can totally relate to the nervousness before weigh in. You wrote a great blog - keep up the good work though - you can do it :) emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SWOMIC 5/4/2010 1:58PM

    I feel you!! Congrats on the 60 lbs.

Report Inappropriate Comment
BCARSON11 5/4/2010 1:12PM

    You can do it. Remember it is a long road. It is like being an alcoholic. You have to learn new ways. There will be stumbles! We have it even harder than an alcoholic because they vow not to touch their addiction. As foodaholics, we have to continue to eat!

I have kept my weight off a long time, but I still need to go back and post the food and count the calories every so often.

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
KITKABOO 5/4/2010 11:31AM

    You're doing so well, an inspiration. Keep going!

Everybody on Sparks realises that we are successful coz we have each other, we keep each other going, we inspire one another and we share the good and the bad

Well done to you!

Weighing doesn't come easy no matter how far you've come though!!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TENACIOUSTIGER 5/4/2010 9:46AM

    Can you read my mind, i do the same thing every time it is weigh in . In fact I reset and stand on the scales a couple of different ways in case I can make them weigh lighter. You have really hit the point. You havr lost a lots of weight, an amazing amount and 70 mins of cardio is a great result, I still have 25lbs to reach my goal but love to read your blogs you are a very sharing person emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
STARLIGHT615 5/4/2010 9:16AM

    You are doing just great!! We all need each other!! I need you just as much as you need me! So we are here for each other!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DAWSTE123 5/4/2010 7:41AM

    Love your blog. We all need each other :) keep up the good work!

Report Inappropriate Comment
NYARAMULA 5/4/2010 2:47AM

    I really get you. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TURQUOISELOTUS 5/3/2010 5:31PM

    60 lbs is very impressive! 70 minutes of cardio is very impressive, too! Keep up the great work! Isn't it amazing the difference a year can make?? (Or even a few months...)

Report Inappropriate Comment
SMOOCHIEFACE 5/3/2010 5:17PM

    OMYGOSH, you are totally inside my head.


Report Inappropriate Comment
TRIPLE_EMME 5/3/2010 12:18PM

    John, This is a great blog post!

I can relate to your feeling the day/night before a weigh-in (WI). You have captured this well. (For me this happens on Sunday because Monday morning is my official WI day.)

Also, I'm glad that you put that plea out there. It is so important to be surrounded by positive people -- and those friends that have successfully met their goals are a great positive network!

Have a happy and healthy week!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LUCKYONE60 5/3/2010 11:01AM

    Working toward the same things and admire your words. Keep on keepin on!

Report Inappropriate Comment
ALLYCPEREZ 5/3/2010 10:44AM

    Loved this blog!! Hope you don't mind if I add you as a friend, so I can keep up with your progress! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SHERRIWEBS 5/3/2010 8:41AM

    I feel exactly where you are coming from. Well stated!! Have a great week. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
PIGLETSMALL 5/3/2010 4:57AM

    John, I loved reading your blog. Are you a professional writer? You reach out to others so easily.

As for your fitness and weight loss ... GULP! emoticon

Truly amazing.

Keep up the good work my friend. Hugs x

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
FLOWINGWATER 5/2/2010 10:22PM

    70 minutes of cardio is fantastic!! That's what counts - that you keep moving, keep reflecting, keep learning, and keep on keepin' on!

Me? Yep, those are my goals, too. I may have reached my weight loss goal, but I've still got a lot to learn. Maintenance brings it's own challenges, and being here on Spark, with a community that shares my goals, is what keeps me going.

So, we ALL need each other!

Hang in there! Losing 60 pounds is an amazing accomplishment!

Oh yeah, and I added you as a friend, so I can respond to your request of those of us who have met our goals. emoticon

Comment edited on: 5/2/2010 10:29:40 PM

Report Inappropriate Comment
FRENCHYFEVER 5/2/2010 10:21PM

    You have really done well by losing 60 pounds, John! Awesome, in fact. I'm still on my journey, but have every intention of sticking around when I do finally reach my goal. My Spark friends are always here for me, and I'm here for them for the long haul.

I wish you the best with your weigh-in and if the results aren't what you expected or desired, there's always tomorrow.

Great blog, by the way!

Report Inappropriate Comment
CRIS76 5/2/2010 9:57PM

    I'm in it for the long haul...

oh.. and 70 minutes is SERIOUSLY impressive, in my book. If I can squeeze 30 minutes in, I'm feeling dandy LOL You are kickin' butt!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LEYETTE 5/2/2010 9:47PM

    To lose sixty pounds is AWESOME!!! Don't give you, you're doing a great job!!!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
AMNAGRLA 5/2/2010 9:27PM

    So?! How did it go!?

Report Inappropriate Comment
LUNADRAGON 5/2/2010 9:22PM

    Hey, I am tagging along, I'm not there yet either, but we are moving in the right direction!
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
WATERMELLEN 5/2/2010 9:21PM

    I'm at my goal weight and have been since last July -- and I'm sticking around. The At Goal and Maintaining Team is a terrific resource! Losing weight is one thing, keeping it off is another -- requiring lifelong vigilance (and tracking) as far as I can tell!! I've been kinda disappointed when some other SP friends have disappeared once they've reached their goals, and I dont' plan to do that.

All best with your weight loss journey and yes: lots of us at goal weight here are staying right here!!

Adding you as a friend in response to your very very honest and moving "plea"!! Gotta pass it forward . .. .

Report Inappropriate Comment
TEENY_BIKINI 5/2/2010 9:14PM

    That was really beautiful and honest. Loved it.

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LAWRALOO 5/2/2010 1:30PM

    You've been dang successful and I'm sooo proud of you!
I'm not going anywhere!

Congrats on how far you've come.
You're here, and you're still here and even if the ice cream rears it's ugly head, I know you'll be back too.

I know you'll make your goal :)
I'll be here to push you along the wholeeee way!



Report Inappropriate Comment
TINKERBELL200 5/2/2010 10:46AM

    Thanks john for recognizing us who have reached our goal. I agree we should stick around for our friends who are still striving to meet theirs. I strive to help people in all areas of their lives, in fact that's what some people don't like about me. Tell me if you can figure that one out??? Encouragement to one another is the best medicine. Lifting each other up, instead of pushing each other down.
I also am staying in Sparks, so that i don't become complacent. I don't want this to be just another diet, that I go off of and end up where I started, overweight and very unhappy with myself. I still faithfully log my food and exercise daily, just to make sure, I'm staying within my limits. That to me is the beauty of this program. Everyone needs limits!!!!
Don't beat yourself up about ice cream or that chip. Everything in moderation. Just work it into your plan for the day. I'm not saying eat ice cream every day or all day, but don't deprive yourself of something you really love all the time either. Eat healthy on the whole, but an occasional ice cream isn't going to cause you a disaster. That is of course, if you can do this, without falling completely off the wagon,suffering bumps and bruises!!!! LOL!!!
I remember reading a Sparks page several months ago where a girl had reached her goal and said good bye to all her friends! I thought how sad. Do we do this in life?? Reach our goal and discard friends??? I have met some of the most supportive people on this site in my life, without really meeting them face to face. Why would I want to leave them behind?? Especially if they haven't reached their goals. We are all in this together. It's not all about me!
So that means, John, you're stuck with me anyway!!! I don't know if that's a good thing, or a bad thing??? LOL!
Hang in there good guy, you are making better choices and becoming the guy you want to be! Just continue to be real, and yourself! Those are 2 things for great success! Keep on Sparkin on!!!!

emoticon
Lynne emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
PACHZIGER 5/2/2010 1:12AM

    Good luck with the weigh-in tomorrow!

I'm rooting for you!

emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
KBUCKMASH 5/1/2010 11:52PM

    Am adding my vote to your request. It is a form of passing it forward. You help me, I help the next person and we all are winners. After all it is the least that can be done since Chris/SparkPeople is providing us with a free website to learn from and get help in changing our lifestyles.

Report Inappropriate Comment
XENA1956 5/1/2010 11:36PM

    I will be adding you to my friends list. I have not reached my goal yet but have lost close to 35 pounds. We (you) all need each other to help motivate us(you) to reach our goals. Even when we(you) mess up there will be somebody to help pick us(you) up. Stay strong, I only weigh in 2 times a month and sometimes I have only lost a pound. I just keep going and so can you! emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUSIEMILO 5/1/2010 11:13PM

    I'm not in the category you requested, in fact I'm behind you in the weight loss tote board. But I'll be here.
And I'm sure as heck hoping that you stick around for a LONG time, because I really enjoy your blogs and I also get a lot of motivation from them.
So I'm going to piggy-back my request to yours:
Please stick around John.
We need you!

PS - I'm proud of you.
PPSS - 70 minutes is nothing to shake a stick at! That's a lot of cardio - and you have earned the right to be proud of that effort!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JUST_TRI_IT 5/1/2010 11:10PM

    I am so glad you just wrote that! I was wondering if I had a right to be here once I reach ed my goal.. I hope to be there in a few months. I don't want to go... but the thought crossed my mind that maybe there is some unspoken rule that I ought to take the side door out. And then I realized there are tons of people on here who have been here for years... many of them here still shining a light on the journey options. Still, it was great to read this blog and know that everyone is welcome.

Good luck tomorrow. I hope the traffic gets out of your way so you can let us know how it went!

Report Inappropriate Comment
KARENE10 5/1/2010 10:02PM

    Always love reading your blogs:)Very Inspirational~

Report Inappropriate Comment
KARENE10 5/1/2010 10:01PM

    Always love reading your blogs:)

Report Inappropriate Comment
ANGIEFAYE818 5/1/2010 8:55PM

    Wow!!! What a genuine plea!!! And I second that!!! So true, we need the inspiration from those who have achieved!!! One day....I will be one!!! ;)


Report Inappropriate Comment
SECRETMUSIC 5/1/2010 8:42PM

    Oh, yes, you have said it so well -- we desperately need to see the day-to-day (or at least week-to-week example of those who have made it. "Your work is not done." That's perfect. And when I make my goal, I want to remember it myself!

Bit by bit we pull each other up...

Thanks so much for blogging!

Report Inappropriate Comment
GEEMAWEST 5/1/2010 8:37PM

    I haven't reached my goal yet but you couldn't pay me to leave this site even when I do. I have made too many wonderful lifetime friends here, and you are one of them.

Love, Cheryl

Report Inappropriate Comment
WEEZIE1122 5/1/2010 8:31PM

    Okay John. I have not reached my goal but I am here for you. I would suggest that you settle down, however, all the "pacing like and lion" and "sweating up a storm" will be have results on the scales in the morning. emoticon Besides, if you were perfect we probably would not love you near as much as we all do.

FYI--Just in case you haven't noticed, you are being followed.

Am I the only one who feels like I am cyber stalking John? Every time I log in I have to refrain from going straight to his blog before my own page.

John, don't tell Joan, but I have become addicted to you blogs.
emoticon Better your blogs than chocolate, I suppose.

And I have the feeling this blog is going to receive the most popular vote again.

emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 5/1/2010 8:38:08 PM

Report Inappropriate Comment
KATIEGLEN012 5/1/2010 8:17PM

    Love the ritual...we should do a ritual weigh-in team! The stories would be hilarious! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
KELLIGIRL523 5/1/2010 8:17PM

    Very well put. We all need each other on this journey. We got your back. I believe if we eat well (and honest), and we move, we will lose. Some weeks it will be more than others, but eventually the scale, and our bodies will catch up with us, and thank us. Just work your program, day in and day out, and regardless what the day is.... it will be a great day.

Report Inappropriate Comment


Voted Popular Blog Post: View All Popular Posts

The Ice Cream Cone

Friday, April 30, 2010

Just because I am over weight doesn’t mean I am a victim. Oh, let me tell you, I have played that role enough times in my life to win a major award. But if I am really serious about my own health than I am anything but a victim. I am the sum total of the choices I make in every minute of every day. When I make positive choices then I get a positive reward. It might be the scale dropping a pound or so, a pair of pants fitting a bit better or I can feel that wonderful “kick’ when I am doing my cardio.

It comes down to choices and being heroes to those around us rather than playing the poor victim.

Buckhannon, West Virginia has the very best Dairy Queen in the world. It’s an old fashioned one. There is no place to sit. You walk up to the window and you order. It closes in October and opens on a limited basis in April. Their ice cream machines are the old fashioned kind. That means you get thick, dense ice cream rather than a lot of air. I spent all day Monday traveling , I was tired and cranky and skipped my cardio workout because as I rationalized, “I was beat.” I wasn’t, however, tired enough to drive the twelve miles from my hotel to eat ice cream. I had a positive dinner, chicken breast, fresh veggies and unsweet tea. Then I walked down the block, in the rain, and purchased a small vanilla cone.

I don’t feel the ice cream cone was the bad choice although until yesterday I convinced myself it was. To find the bad choice you have to scroll up a bit to this line: “I spent all day Monday traveling there; I was tired and cranky and skipped my cardio workout because as I rationalized, “I was beat.” The choice I made was to forego the exercise. A jury of my peers would most likely buy the choice I made. I wasn’t, however, too tired to drive an additional half hour, both ways, to eat ice cream. It bothered me all week.

I didn’t see the lack of exercise as the poor choice, I saw eating the ice cream as being the culprit of my guilt. Time to pull out the violins.

It comes down to what we choose. Later in the week a client and I prepared to eat a meal. He said ‘We’ll go wherever you can eat something.” I smiled and said “I can eat anything. It’s what I choose to eat that gives me a positive or negative outcome.” I could have been a victim and sadly nodded my head and bleated “Broccoli and water please!” That fosters guilt and guilt fosters anger and anger fosters that little voice that grows louder and louder inside of say “What’s the use, this stuff doesn’t work anyways!” I might have played the victim.

What I am learning is that our choices are linked together and affect a lot more than we realize. All week long I scourged myself for eating that stupid ice cream cone. Woes is me.

I had the same long ride back home yesterday. I woke up at 4 AM and had to meet someone for breakfast at 5:30 AM. Trying to stick with your plan in a truck stop is a real challenge. I made the choice to do so. I had a seven hour drive home. I was beat. I threw in a load of laundry and checked my email.

“Ah, a new friend!! I said.

A person new to Spark had added me as a friend. I quickly returned the favor went to their Spark page and saw they had just joined yesterday and they had already written a blog!!! Cool beans.

The blog was about being motivated.

“I wonder if they know about that ice cream cone? If they did they never would have friended me!!!”

It went on to say how everything they read on Spark motivated them to go out and buy a pedometer and start walking.

So there I sat, remnants of ice cream dripping down my psyche. I changed clothes and got on my bike and went to the gym. I worked out and I felt good and it wasn’t until this morning that it dawned on me that I was only using the ice cream as the culprit. I had punked out on my exercise and I felt bad, felt guilty, felt like I let myself down. When I found the issues, I corrected it and now I know that I won’t die if I exercise after a seven hour car ride!!!

It comes down to what you choose and when you make the decision you have to live with it. It’s not magic, rocket science or the ice cream cone. It’s just you. I am proud of most of my choices. I should be. The more positive choices I make the better, stronger and quicker person I become. That’s a real positive for me
It’s just me and me here. The question I ask myself every single morning:

“Am I Worth It?”

I am.

So are you.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JCG702 5/10/2010 9:12PM

  My reward to myself is a cone of vanilla ice cream from Chicl-Fil-A and I never feel guilty. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TOONGIRL150 5/8/2010 6:01PM

  I had bacon for breakfast and have decided not to let it sabbotage the rest of my day. I wanted it and I had it and it was good. On my way to the gym....

Report Inappropriate Comment
ELSCO55 5/5/2010 4:35PM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MUSTANG_SALLY2 5/4/2010 3:19PM

    I adore ice cream. I refuse to live in a world that does not include it. I just work it into my plan. I don't eat a ton and I try to pick really, really good stuff but I'm going to have ice cream. I enjoyed reading your blog. It was a bit spooky as you talk about yourself like I do but alas you have figured it out. Choices... I just have to make the right choices. Thanks for a great blog!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
KRISTY_704 5/4/2010 12:56PM

    Great blog!

Report Inappropriate Comment
NANASNOW 5/4/2010 12:33PM

    I like your blog. Sometimes it is ok to say yes to a small temptation. What was hard for you is that it dragged you around all week! Did you stop, no! Will you keep going yes! I think you are pretty cool!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JAXMI11ER 5/4/2010 10:06AM

    Love it! Though now it's making me want a dilly bar! LOL! :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
ZRAMOMMA 5/4/2010 9:45AM

    Thank you for posting this blog. I always enjoy reading your blogs and come away every time motivated to make positive choices.

Report Inappropriate Comment
TENACIOUSTIGER 5/4/2010 9:42AM

    great blog, i love to read them, thanks for sharing, we are not perfect and the icecream was in reality a lesson learned. Hang in there emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
GEGEFROG 5/4/2010 8:00AM

    John, I love this blog it really puts things in perspective with things..

Report Inappropriate Comment
WIGIME 5/4/2010 7:53AM

    John, you hit the nail on the head with this blog. So true and it's right in front of our face and yet at times we don't see it. Thank you so much for putting this into words, you definitely have a way with them!

Keep up the good work!

Report Inappropriate Comment
AIMEELANI 5/2/2010 1:07PM

    loved thois blog!

Report Inappropriate Comment
TINKERBELL200 5/2/2010 9:59AM

    Great blog John. You are so right our choices do effect us everyday, whether good or bad! I agree too excuses can talk us out of what is good for us. I sometimes push my fitness aside, because it's raining, or I'm tired,or it's another stressful Monday and I'm just beat! Excuses ultimately keep us from reaching our goals!!!!
Thank you for sharing your journey. I always enjoy reading your blogs.
emoticon
Lynne

Report Inappropriate Comment
KELLIGIRL523 5/1/2010 8:23PM

    Great blog... and I agree, out of all the choices you made all week long, I think the ice cream cone pales in camparison.

You GOT this!

Report Inappropriate Comment
IMJUSTDUCKIE 5/1/2010 4:35PM

    Goodness, if I couldn't have a treat every now-and-again I wouldn't be able to stay w/SP or anything else for that matter! :) When I do, I don't feel it's a set-back or feel guilty. If I go beyond that treat, THEN I do. For all that you do, for yourself and everyone else, you deserve a treat and I hope that after all that "beating yourself up" you realized that you ENJOYED it!!!!

P.s. I would have had gone "all out" and had chocolate! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TRISH2229 5/1/2010 2:13AM

    I agree with YOYONOMORE. You know, I would have done the same thing but without the guilt! I would have rationalized it by including it in my nutrition tracker and noticed I gained calcium and 6 grams of protein! emoticon You should pride yourself on choosing to walk (in the rain no less) instead of driving. I agree every things a choice. You could have chosen a hamburger, fries and wash it down with a coke and DQ Big chocolate Blizzard for dessert. In my book you did pretty good! Besides a plain ole vanilla cone will not rock the scale as long as you don't have one everyday. I refuse to tell myself I can't have something. I eat clean every day so if I decide one day to have an ice cream cone - then I'm going to have it! Fortunately I rarely eat sugar anymore and I'm a baker! I just bake and take it out of the house - my neighbors love it! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
NOTGIVINGUP49 4/30/2010 8:54PM

    Your blogs are just so open, honest, and motivational. Thank you for being an inspiration!

Report Inappropriate Comment
BESTSUSIEYET 4/30/2010 7:56PM

    Your choice not to exercise AND your choice to enjoy an ice cream cone were only 2 choices out of how many for the week? My suspicion is that at least 90% of the other choices were good --so, let go of both of these! I worry far more about mindless snacking than about a deliberate choice to enjoy something that isn't always available to you. Glad you wrote about the choice, and your reaction. You continue to inspire many others!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
ROTTLADY 4/30/2010 5:31PM

    I enjoyed your blog as usual. It was honest and motivational at the same time.We have no one to blame but ourselves and the choices we have made.I still deal daily with the question is it worth it, but come the next day and I am still here back for more.

Report Inappropriate Comment
TEDYBEAR2838 4/30/2010 4:38PM

    Well, another great blog, my friend. You always hit the nail squarely on the head.

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
RONDAJONES 4/30/2010 2:50PM

    OMGosh!!!! I use to live in Buckhannon!!!! When I left there...McDonald's was just coming into town. The only 'fast food' places were Tasty Freeze and Hardee's! I couldn't even finish your blog I am so excited!! I went to school at BUHS until '85 then transferred to Ohio to live with my mom. WOW...I need to finish the blog!
OK, finished. LOL I know what you mean in the whole blog. It happens. I gained 30 lbs AFTER my son was born...10 more than I was before him. Being tired does a lot to our system. We just HAVE to find the voice and action that drowns it out so that we can move forward with what we know we NEED to do. It is hard, but we have to work out even when we don't think we can...even if it is just for 15 minutes...just long enough to show our bodies (and that tired voice) who is boss!

Comment edited on: 4/30/2010 2:55:29 PM

Report Inappropriate Comment
FANAMAMA 4/30/2010 1:35PM

    You are so honest with yourself. Is this new for you? Because it sure seems like this is just who you are. It is new for me and it is scary.
Neither the ice cream or not exercising is a problem, because you are in the process of changing your relationship with food, exercise and your body. That takes time and patience and courage. But the change will be worth it because it will be a permanent change. And that is ALL good!


Report Inappropriate Comment
JAE_HENNINGTON 4/30/2010 12:56PM

  Balance... That's the key word I think in life. In anything you choose to do. Now I have a problem. I am a binge eater. If I would let one tsp. of sugar no matter what form it would send me running off the path to find all the junk food I could devour. So I don't I stay true to my program. Sometimes I find myself feeling deprived. You know, oh poor me what is life if you can't enjoy it. But for me. I have enjoyed life a little too much and a little too long with my bad eating. The secret I think is finding something to do that I enjoy as much as eating. I have to confess some days I am hard pressed to find it.
You are so right John everyday we have the choice of life and death and it is up to each of us to make the right choice.
Once again, a wonderful blog

Report Inappropriate Comment
BECCALYNN75 4/30/2010 12:51PM

    emoticonAnother great blog John!

But between this and the SP article "Habits of Fit People: Don't Make Exercise Excuses", I'm beginning to feel pretty guilty about my exercise lately.

Thanks to both you & SP for that "kick in the butt" when I needed it! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JUSTFOXXY 4/30/2010 12:13PM

    Ummm, I was probably standing in line behind you. I am addicted to the DQ Dilly bar. However, I was able to compensate with all the walking, talking and moving of equipment during a work training session I held.

Dilly bars. Yum.

Report Inappropriate Comment
YOYONOMORE1 4/30/2010 10:59AM

    My friend, Margaret and I will be going for our Sunday walk and there is a small shop up town that sells the real ice cream and we have already decided that this Sunday we are going to stop in and buy a single scoop of ice cream, but we have to walk from where I live to up town and then back again, so we'll be eating and exercising at the same time, and this will go in my calorie count for the day, it'd be pretty sad if we could never have a treat. Glad you quit beating yourself up over this, keep moving forward.

Hugs,
Shirl

Report Inappropriate Comment
TXNANA_4 4/30/2010 10:58AM

    I would have a hard time resisting DQ ice cream too!

Report Inappropriate Comment
GERIKRAGH 4/30/2010 10:48AM

    Wow! Loved this blog. You put all our feelings out there for us to see ourselves. Thank you.

Report Inappropriate Comment
TRIPLE_EMME 4/30/2010 10:29AM

    Another brilliant blog, John!

I'm proud of the positive upwards spiral of all your good choices. emoticon to you for owning your choices and behavior! You are an inspiration.

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
CMBELISLE 4/30/2010 10:26AM

    Woo Hoo! I probably would have had the ice cream too, if I had been able to drag myself out of the hotel room to go get it. Last night, I logged in my dinner and noticed that I had met my calorie goals for the day and was well-balanced with a little room to spare. So, I got out my scales and scooped up a tasty little serving of low-fat ice cream. I didn't even go over on the calories and it was a nice way to end the day.

When people ask how I've lost the weight, I keep telling them that I eat what I want when I want just not as much as I used to, plus I exercise. They sometimes get this perplexed look on their faces.

Report Inappropriate Comment
STILLPOINT 4/30/2010 10:01AM

    Brilliant! YOU are worth it - I think the only realization we need for weight loss is self love.



Report Inappropriate Comment
ERODIBLE 4/30/2010 9:54AM

    I also hate it when I hear things like "We'll go somewhere where you can eat something". It makes you feel like someone with a disorder or something and that people feel sorry for you.

The challenge is making (mostly) good choices wherever you are. And if you slip up every now and then, it's not failure, it's just being human.

Good luck! You ARE worth it!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JCDROLSHAGEN 4/30/2010 9:35AM

    John, I hear you! In my case, I was being sociable at dinner. I made the good choices ( I think) for dinner, and then threw in towel when the dessert cart came. My original plan was to have coffee only. In retrospect, I walked miles during the conference I attended so the dessert was not as traumatic a deal as I thought. Yeah the scale kind of yelled at me (it went up a few) but I am home, and back on the plan. But I did have fun and got some good pointers at the meetings! Go me!! emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEWBERRYJAMIE 4/30/2010 9:25AM

    Absolutely we are worth it John!!! This is wonderful! I have a battle each morning to eat breakfast pizza, and when I do, I beat myself up and I rationalize eating it! I worked out this morning, so I can have breakfast pizza. The bottom line is that I need to stop feeling guilty every time I decide to eat a slice of breakfast pizza, because I know that 95% of the time, I am making good choices. We are worth all our efforts! We will stay strong!

Report Inappropriate Comment
TNTEACHER2 4/30/2010 9:15AM

    My main problem for years has been the diet or do not diet mentality. I need to make good choices every day, every meal. You are great at doing that !
Marcy

Report Inappropriate Comment
MORTICIAADDAMS 4/30/2010 9:03AM

    Having an occasional ice cream cone and skipping an occasional work out will not cause irreparable harm. It's getting in the HABIT of eating an ice cream cone and skipping workouts.

As an R.N. I can tell you that there are times it's a good idea to skip the work out. When you are too tired it can lead to injury.

You missed one work out and drove an hour for an ice cream cone. Not a day to brag about but no month long binge either. You are still a winner in my book. Forgive yourself and move on but don't make this a habit.

By the way, I had a small Blizzard when they were on sale. Worked it in my plan and was still on target for calories, carbs. fats, and proteins. A lifetime of no treats is a lifetime of deprivation. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
AMABILE75 4/30/2010 8:42AM

    I am so happy that you stopped beating yourself up over an ice cream cone and realized the true issue behind your guilt. :) Sometimes we really do need to have those items that we love so much and sound so wonderful to us, even if they are not healthy. What I've really noticed during this journey is that the better choices I make, the healthier lifestyle I live... the less I want all those things I used to crave. Even more than that, once I have that item, it seems to have lost its luster. What used to be an item on par with the Holy Grail suddenly seems no more enjoying than eating a rubber shoe! :) Not everything of course, but so many items whatever I have makes me feel so sick I don't want it anymore. And those that I do still love, I eat a much smaller portion. :)

You are great John!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SAFFSTAR 4/30/2010 8:41AM

    Hi John, I loved reading your blog today and I'm glad I helped in some small way! You've helped me too - I'm going to a friend's 40th birthday party tonight (complete with fat laden buffet) and had resigned myself to falling off the wagon. However, after reading your blog it's clicked with me that stuffing my face isn't compulsory so... for the first time EVER, I'm going to have dinner before I go! That way, I decide what I eat. I will still partake in a little buffet, to be sociable if nothing else, but I won't be starving hungry so will make better choices. Thanks John, hope you have a great Friday

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
KATIEGLEN012 4/30/2010 8:31AM

    It is all about choices for sure. We have done this soooooo long...however, WE ARE CATCHING ON NOW!!!!!!!

Celebrate the realization!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DOLLBABE56 4/30/2010 8:31AM

    The sooner we realize that we are not perfect the happier we will be.

I had a sad day yesterday. I shut down. I ate nearly a whole box of chocolate cheerios. Today I threw out what was left. Today I feel better. All day I belittled myself for not exercising. Even last night will I was watching one of my favorite shows, I was thinking "during the next commercial I should get down on that floor and do some crunches, or stretch, or something". I didn't because I still sad. Now this morning I feel better. I acknowledged what was making me sad, had my little pity party (ok, BIG pity party). Now I feel better. After I finish with my spark "job" (I consider my time here in the mornings as my work, and I love it.) I am going to go exercise and the walk my dog.

I see exactly what you are getting at. I am not letting yesterday bother me anymore. It was just a hiccup.

Report Inappropriate Comment


First Page  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 Last Page