JOE_ANNE2   29,748
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Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Wow, that is so cool :)
I am very greatful, because I was needing that motivational boost. I was feeling sad yesterday, or on New Years eve. It was just the previous year that my son RILEY and I were at home when that midnight hour struck and we went outside to see the fireworks (2 miles from home) and this time he was not here but by GODs blessing I had my grandbaby with me and I was thinking is this how it's supposed to be? GOD is this what you had planned? that I would not be alone? I think yes, GOD has a purpose and I need to be appreciative of even the smallest things.
I did not fall into dispair but the sadness was there and now it is lifted :) and I thank you all who have left me messages. I pray GODs blessings for you all too.
mom to Angel RILEY

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SMILES4383 1/2/2007 9:18PM

    I saw your SP on the spotlight. Reading your SparkPage I realized how strong you ARE to begin your journey to health with such a heavy heart. I appreciate that you are dedicating your journey to your beloved son Riley. Becoming the best YOU that you can be will ensure that you are the healthiest grandma possible. Your experience will motivate others who think they have struggles......Best of SUCCESS to you as you move forward toward your goal. Terri

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    Congrats on being in the spotlight. You deserve it. Keep up the good work.

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Dreams & Stuff

Thursday, December 28, 2006

I had a dream the other day about my Beloved Mom, and she was getting upset with me because she thought I was drinking and partying. Although I would never do this, but in my dream I was with my neices who did. I guess it hurts to see my mom upset in my dreams, because the night before she journeyed to Heaven I had a similar type of dream and it bothered me that I hurt my mom. I know she loved me and would do anything for me and that thought helps me to get through also knowing that my baby boy is in Heaven with his grandma too.

My other stuff, is that I am going back on WW, and have recieved my WW at home stuff. It's great since I had to pack up my old stuff, but all the items are different. I won't start the journal until next Monday but I am using a note book for now.
Oh yes I bought myself an iPOD and have since add music and I even started back walking, two days in a row, WOOHOO!

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JANIERAYE 1/2/2007 9:40AM

    Joanne Thought this poem could help you..
Praying for a better new year for you
A man found a cocoon of an emperor moth. He took it home so that he
could watch the moth come out of the cocoon. On the day a small opening
appeared, he sat and watched the moth for several hours as the moth
struggled to force the body through that little hole.
The moth seemed to be stuck and appeared to have stopped making progress.
It seemed as if it had gotten as far as it could and it could go no farther.
The man, in his kindness, decided to help the moth; so he took a pair of scissors
and snipped off the remaining bit of the cocoon. The moth then emerged
easily. But its body was swollen and small, its wings wrinkled and
shriveled. The man continued to watch the moth because he expected that,
at any moment, the wings would enlarge and expand to and able to
support the body, which would contract in time.
Neither happened! In fact, the little moth spent the rest of its life crawling
around with a small, swollen body and shriveled wings. It never was able to fly.
The man in his kindness and haste did not understand that the struggle required
for the moth to get through the tiny opening was necessary to force fluid from the
body of the moth into its wings so that it would be ready for flight upon achieving
its freedom from the cocoon. Freedom and flight would only come after the
struggle. By depriving the moth of a struggle, he deprived the moth of health.
Sometimes struggles are exactly what we need in our life. If we were to go through
our life without any obstacles, we would be crippled. We would not be as strong as
what we could have been. Give every opportunity a chance, leave no room for
regrets, and don't forget the power in the struggle.
~ Author Unknown ~

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My blues

Saturday, December 23, 2006

I did a bad thing and again I pay for it. I gambled money that I could have used elsewhere and I am feeling such guilt. It is a failure that I just can't get over. I didn't make us poor, but it bothers me. My excuse, is that for a few hours it took me away from my problems, from my grief. BUT it only brought guilt.

Now that I have confessed, I can move on. I will not run away anymore. GOD if your there I need you now more then ever, PLEASE?

mom to Angel RILEY

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SMILES4383 12/23/2006 11:47PM

    Not that I am so knowlegable about this, but have you ever tried to 'gamble' with the games on yahoo, or the other sites....where you don't spend REAL MONEY.....the excitement can be the same and the risk is just not there. Believe me,,,,,God is there......He will hear your plea. Many people use many things to divert themselves from the 'day to day'.....unfortunately, using money in a negative way.....increases grief expotentially.

My father-in-law was very rich. They had a $300,000.000 mobile home......traveled all over the world. He gave my son a very good lesson one day. He pulled out a $100.00 bill, rolled it up, and caught it on fire. He said - with the seriousness of a preacher--.....if you don't have money to BURN, son, you don't have money to gamble.....simple.....plain. Made a great impression on me.

Wishing you a GREAT Holiday and the best possible New Year....remember.....tomorrow is a new day - with no mistakes in it. May it be the beginning of a NEW future for you.....Terri

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Content, or calm before the storm?

Thursday, December 21, 2006

This has been a better week for my family and I. BUT I wonder is it because things will get worse or has GOD finally seen my plight? I will accept what he gives.
I've decided to do the Weight Watchers program, again, and have ordered the new stuff for the At Home program. I have tried to find a doctor who would prescribe weight loss meds but there is none in my area, also I can't find a reliable online site either. I know meds are not the answer but it helps me and I would use it if available.
I did go for a walk once this week and am hoping to go again today. It's just that we have been so busy moving our stuff out of our house that there has been no time for anything even cooking. So we've been eating out for the past three days, but that's getting old and I want a home cooked meal.
Well that all for updates. I am doing my best with what I got,

mom to Angel RILEY


Remembering the good

Thursday, December 14, 2006

Although things seem to be falling apart, it really isn't.
I am trusting that GOD is in control and I am where I need to be. Even in my weight loss efforts I do see progress, or is it just because it is my home scale? I missed my TOPS group this week so I didn't get to weigh in. I will make next week though.

Tonight and probably tomorrow, my family and I are going out for dinner and I will do my best to make good choices.

You all have a blessed weekend with your families.
mom to Angel RILEY

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KELLY_SS 12/15/2006 7:39PM

    Sounds like your family is going thru a very difficult time. I'm so sorry to hear this and I pray things improve for you all very very soon. {{{hugs}}}

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